REACH OUT
I'm alone
Within my forbidden
Lust
Reach for the past
Slip through the
Future
Another wasted
Soul
Hungry for love
Starving
For something less
Something more
Reach out
Moisture and heat
Limbs have fallen asleep
In sinful positions
Scream out
Inside the lies
Hides the truth
It's not over
I belong in limbo
Bleeding my prey...dry
Reach out
THE DANCING
From my head to the tips of my toes
The heat from your blood spreads
I close my eyes and reach out
And I can feel your coldness inside me
Downward travels the warmth, ardent and fierce
As a liquid fire burns my soul within a kiss
My body writhing beneath yours
Passion rises upwards and consumes my essence
Changes within are too subtle to note
As the desire grows more frenzied
The call of the dead grows more insistant
Towards that summons we both shall go
WANDERING
Another dirty street on which I wander
Breathing the crisp smog-filled air of
The night
I prowl through somber alleys and walk
Across the unmarked graves of those
Unlucky few
Who never knew
The fatal secret that I carry in my soul
I would not weep even if I were able
Each night is new
Even though nothing has changed
Another year passes in the same manner
As the hundred-some years that passed before
I continue on
I'm not certain of anything anymore
I want to live again forever and yet I wish to die
Oh, the night
Oh, the sweetness
Another dirty street on which I wander
COBWEBS
Shadows move slowly across the dark
Street as I gaze longingly past the
Rooftops and over the city's twinkling
Frigid lights though my two story bedroom
Window
Shadows enclose my soul
Memories ebb and flow through the murky
Depths of my shattered mind as
Distant passions still torment my restless
Slumber and my body still burns to ashes for
The touch of his mouth against my flesh
Now the seasons have spun a tapestry of
Misery and pain that would surely
Have driven me insane if it weren't for the
Sweetness of the rare lovemaking we shared
That returns to me in vivid dreams
Shadows fall across my eyes as his face
Becomes more and more faded as
The years turn upon each other and my
Bod begins to feel the toll of the seasons
And my mind is clouded now with cobwebs
COLORS
Colors swirling inside my mind
Hues of desire, bright crimson
Shades of passion, amber
Kisses in a forbidden light
Colors of ecstasy twirl together
Paint for a chaotic portrait
Shadows are darker now than
They were before
WHISPERS IN THE MIST
As shy as a ghost that whispers in the mist
Between the worlds
Behind the silken shawl
As shy as a tender caress on a cold night
Between the sheets
Behind the golden aura
Some people live to love, some just don't care
It's never fair
There's never time enough
The gold-hued aura of love turns suddenly black
Between the crimson
Behind the evening's shroud
Not a cloud in the starless winter skies
Not a word is spoken
Just the distant wind's sobbing
As shy as a woman-child's first plunge
Into the mysteries
Of the darkness of sex
As shy as a teardrop from a broken heart
That melts within my palm
As you did to me
I do to you
The air is charged with a sexual sensation
As the lightning strikes
The light casts an eerie glow upon your face
Pale in the lamp-light
As the ghosts of centuries past rise up at your command
I walk the deadened city streets
Waiting
Watching for you
Between the worlds
Can you hear, can you feel the veil softly swaying in the breeze,
The voices whispering beneath the mist?
MYSTERY
You are a mystery to me, I wonder what you believe you are
Your eyes are insane and I know that I should get away fast
But my feet, they are cemented into the ground on which I stand
My mouth will not move to tell you what I want from you now
I want you, you know that, don't you?
Everything about you has me screaming in my sleep even though
I am awake and dreaming
Oh, tell me what this means!
My mind is splitting completely in two and I see your eyes all the time
I hear the tormented cries of a million banished souls
I hear my own voice join them and it echoes through the darkness
That I have found myself trapped within
SHADES OF NOTHING
You look into my eyes and probe my very soul
Can this be real or just another frenzy fantasy?
Oceans stop rushing to the shore, the world Ceases
Clouds in different shades of nothing pass me by
My eyes feel like fire and my heart is burning Fast
Can this be real?
Oh, I don't think I want to know
Don't turn away when I call your name
Don't leave me yet
Don't pretend you did not hear the ask if I understand
The flames caress my essence as you caress my body
In the early morning light, I alway awake alone Why?
Your kisses always send me someplace filled with pain
Yet tempered with pleasure
Your eyes hold all the mysteries of the ages and scream
The truth you'd rather have kept hidden
You speak to me of the passion, the lust, and the rage you hold Deeply
I sense my time with you grows short, a new hunger flickers across
Your features when we are alone
I feel a tender dread, a premonition of things to come, when we are
making love
CHAOS
The howl of the wind shrieks like an angry
Demon in the somberness of the frigid
Winter night
The moon glares down pregnant with self-righteous
Anger and false pride swelling forth
In the sky
A thousand pins of light prick the ashen
Shawl of evening
As the ebony wings of the raven momentarily
Sheild the moon and passes shadow
Across the land
As flakes of ivory-hued snow descends from
The suddenly gathered darkness
Of the night
The howl of the wind shrieks inside my
Mind as the captive memories beat against
The walls of their prison
NOCTURNAL
As strong arms wrap me in their embrace
Ardent caresses weave a treacherous
Enchantment of scalding desire
As calloused hands rake through my hair
Silently, the moon shines in her envy
For my lover is with me and she has none
As the flames of rapture enfold our gyrating forms
Tenderly the cries of raised to the beauty of the
Evening echoes the bliss within my soul
PASSIONATE
As ardent as the wild lust in your eyes
The blood coursing though my veins begins To boil
As cold as the teeth pressed savagely against My breast
The sudden aroma of death stifles my cries of Objection
As sadistic as the hours which never last
The passion in your eyes had changed so swiftly To hunger
As calm as the existence which hovers amid The shadows
The night seems to prosper in the enchantment You cast.
MISTRESS
As the wind whispers your name
I hear my screams in the air
Although I know everything's insane
I find myself wishing I were there
Clouds of despair around my soul
Summer renders the days long
Waiting for you to make me whole
Night falls in spite of right of wrong
I waste my days wandering these halls
Listening to the echoes of my fears
As I study the ageless paintings upon the walls
The wind calls out a warning through the years
When darkness has at last fell
You appear in the mist and come into my arms
Every caress takes me closer to hell
Still, I cannot help but surrender to your charms
Just a small taste is what you give
Later you say we both may feast
Although I still have another life to live
You tell me in death pleasure will increase
Now my thoughts are my own once more
And I look back on all the lies
Even as I passed willingly through the door
I should have read my fate written in your eyes
AWAKES
Slivers of darklight reflect though the cracked
and somber glass of my hidden emotions
Bleeding memories clot the passageways to my Soul
As crimsonblack night prevades my dreaming
A perverted yearning twists my essence
In it's undeniable grip
Until it awakes
FORBIDDEN
Emptiness drowns within the posion of your soul
Shallow water filled with the dirt of your desire
Sinking deeper into the yellow pool of scum
Bloodied sheet proclaims your denied guilt
Sweat stumbled from your brow as the verdict was Passed
Now candy is the only sweetness you'll ever get
The very air you breathe is condemned to staleness
Tainted life pounds within a crystalized heart
Father died a slow exsistance joining Mother
Inside the windmill of your sudden raging Sickness
WALKING
I was walking down an abandoned
road once upon a night
I thought I caught a glimpse of you
In the glow of the moon
When I called your name, you voice shook
With unshed tears
I knew that it was too late to return
To the tattered page
I was walking down a forked road that
Lead me past my exsistence
I though I caught a glimpse of you
In the flash of a knife
When I turned to look it was
With eyes that saw too well
I knew that it was too late with the blade
I had ceased to be
I WILL FOLLOW
Gather your wits
Your going under
Into the deep
Into the morbid
I cannot aide you
Yet I will follow
I cannot help you
I cannot help myself
Yet I will follow
Gather your thoughts
Your bags have been packed
Your going down
Into the deep
Into the chaos
Of your sheltered nightmares
And I will follow
Yes, you know it's true
Even though I'll be damned
Forever to the shadows
It matters not
I will follow
Through darkness
And back-I will follow
Through agony and pain
I will follow
Just to be with you
To feel your blood against my lips
Once again forever
I will follow
DEAD FLOWERS
Dead flowers lay like children sleeping, so innocent
Within my palms
Dead flowers crumpled into powder in my enraged
And frustrated fists
Dead flowers are so pretty in my hands
Like a wayward heart after the damage
Dead flowers are so symbolic yet I know not what this
Means
Dead flowers blow away in the dust upon the wind never to
Be dead flowers again
THE SCREAMS OF ANGELS
The laughter of the gods echoes within my mind
I am afraid to wander these tormented halls
I am afraid of the hidden truths that I might find
The screams of angels bounces off the walls
The screams of angels echoes within my head
As, laughing delightedly, the demons rip off their wings
And I can't recall just what it was He once said
I know it had something to do with the crowing of king
Ah, well, in the end it matters not what we may recall
The blade has been starving these last days
And I have fed it always knowing, this was my downfall
Now I am forced to wander, alone, this labyrinth
The laughter of the gods shatters the mirrors in here
And the demons have ceased to frighten me
As the way grows darker, the passage narrow, the voices
Of my past, I hear
And from the ghosts of my past, again I flee
EVERYTHING SHALL BE ALLRIGHT
I am standing outside among the snow-covered roses
All that's left of the wonderful blooms is a single thorn
And as I look and think about everything I really know
I feel again the sadness that says my heart was torn
The wind is up and the tears have frozen on my lashes
All of the memories, like snowflakes, fly past my eyes
And I know even as my flesh still burns, our love is ashes
Where once we may have had sweetness, now we have lies
I know that I cannot rely on another's word or deed
And even if I wanted I could not find another one to tell
That even though the knife is out, my soul still bleeds
I have seen the bottom of the pit after I fell
So the roses' thorn in my hand is sharp and cold
And suddenly I can see the winter's sun rising from the night
I know that before long my memories will be old
And when the winter's snow has gone, everything shall be allright
SOMEDAYS
Somedays when I am alone
Without the constant rattle of other's thoughts
Spinning within my mind
I like to stare outside my window and breathe
The dust from the people's ways
I used to sleep all the time before my soul was taken
When the ghosts of morning whisper
I close my mind as completely as I close my bedroom door
Pretending that I was there when I wasn't
Somedays I enjoy the silence
Of sunday evening within the old graveyard
Strolling between the tombstones, I toss the dead flowers
Up into the air as I talk to myself and the
Sunday evening lugubrious
A BIT OF ME DIES
Please hear my scream
I don't want to decend
Into the cruel trap again
Everything's the same
As it was back then
Before all the sin I knew who
I was going to be
Where I was going
The truth I had failed to discern
Help me if you really believe
My darkness I will share
And even though you say you'll never
Dare I know you will deceive
And loneliness is a double-bladed knife
It cuts both ways to take your life
Come walk the tormented halls
Where the darkness screams
In a shadowed voice
I know that our time is coming to
An end
But if you think our love has left
Us blind
Just remember that your always
On my mind and even as I leave
You in my past I cannot be saved
From the memories
EXPLAINATION
I sat up in bed late one night after having
Been awoken by a troubling sensation
The feeling that you were going to do some
Damage to my trusting heart
The strange desire to wake you from your
Contented slumber and scream in your face
Gripped me as I stared across the room
At our wedding photo upon the dresser
I sighed in weary frustration before I threw the
Blankets down and crawled out of bed that night
I walked down the hall and opened the door
To your study, a testosterone haven I rarely visit
I subcumbed to the curiosity as I looked over
The work you've completed and what you were
Still working on. That's when I came across
Her number written on a folded peice of paper
It slipped out of the book it had been stuffed within
The rage which filled me near ruined my calmness
I had to sit down for a moment and count to ten slowly
Trying to convince myself that you probably have a
Good explaination
God, I sure hope so
STORM
As the lightning flashes behind your eyes
The distant thunder herald's your arrival
Breathtaking surrender that I cannot deny
Rain in my soul brings about my survival
Storm clouds cannot hide the sun from your face
When you place me into the light of your love
Making love in the moonlight, and your sweet taste
Spinning into the brightness of the stars above
Allow me to wrap myself about you as we collide together
The earth shall shake and the stars shall fall one by one
As the storm gathers and builds to a passion we share forever
Until the thunder growls and the lightning strikes the moon
I WISH
I wish I knew of a way to show you
I wonder what ever happened to the passion that used to possess us
I wonder where your thoughts are roaming to if they are not roaming to us
I wish I knew of a way to show you what could be once more
I wish I knew of a way to show you
I USED TO STAND OUTSIDE
I used to stand outside and the stars would hear my dreams
They told me that in love and hate, nothing is as it seems
And all is fair and all is right
When we turn out the light
In the silent darkness of the night things can happen so fast
And as highly as a bird flies
It waits not for good-byes
As the morning breeze rushes past to caress my chilled skin
I close my eyes and think back to where I have once been
When all the stars did sing
And nightly bells did ring
When once the memories were still young and everthing was real
And the narrow road to peace was found only by the love we feel
I used to stand alone and wait
Thinking of my true love mate
And wondering where he has gone and wondering if I made a mistake
When he asked me for the night and my body and soul my love did take
Now I have wasted another year
And still my heart will not hear
The truth that looms up like a dark and vengeful beast, screaming at me
I turn my head away from the sight it shows to me and refuse to see
Although I know my dreams are in vain
The truth will not render me insane
That the one I gave my whole life and my whole being to is never coming back
Let me alone to dwell in memories of time and place my heart does lack
And though I bear most of the shame
I know I am not only to blame
I used to stand outside and place my hopes and dreams upon the stars in the skies
Silently mourning, for the day he left me alone forever was the day my soul died
WINDOWS
Some would say that the eyes are the windows to the soul
I don't know if it's true, but when I look into your eyes I feel whole
Who would have guessed that the one I was searching for
Would be right under my nose, just across the kitchen floor
I recall the first time we met and the first night we ever kissed
So scared of doing something wrong, my heart found what it missed
I remember the day you told me that you loved me
And suddenly, I knew that I would never be alone
THE SUN'S PRIDE
The sun's bright and prideful bursts of
Fire has scorched and scalded my eyes
The moon's frigid lure has rendered me as
Deranged as their children who play
In the skies
The twilight wind's mournful call pierces
Me deeper than an arrow that has been
Poison-dipped and the stories I am forced to
Keep by the sun's boastful
Glare
Aided by the ever silent silverswift moon
But now I am resting, peaceful and so content
All of the rays of the sun's blinding Illusions
All of the stars' dreams have certainly been sent
To join the moon's distant delusions
The nightly air is filled with silence and the emotions
Of my soul
Within the moon's sadistic glow I am soothed of a sudden,
Yet familiar, pain as I witness the sun's arrogant show
WILDERNESS
The summer winds breathe through my hair
As I stand amid these ancient trees
In the magnitude of all this splender
I speculate on the bantam grain of sand
That is my presence
The sunlight overhead is soothing to my senses
As the water in the river rushes past
The birds high above are rejoicing to the skies
And I relish in the life that surrounds me
The silence all about me is not a stillness
The forest is animated by it's offspring
Screaming, scampering by and singing out loud
Recognizing their mother for their ancestry
I reach out my arms as if to embrace the vibrations
And seek not to laugh for the enchantment I feel
For to fracture the exquisite spell would be ruinous so I
Turn around and a smile trails me as the deer skirt by
THE GARDEN OF CHILDHOOD
Now that the garden is finally growing and the seeds are sprouted
Watered by the tears and warmed by the last breathe of childhood
The roses all have thorns that prick and another life I have counted
As the gentle rains begin to wash away the dirt
The garden is alone, dwelling deep within it's hurt
False hope that surrounds the last whispers of my shattered dreams
As the weeds arise to chock the flowers I can only witness their deaths
I know that nothing ever stays the same and nothing is as it really
seems
The garden is dark now and the children have all said a sad fare well
Still I sometimes visit the garden secretly weeping
As I watch the weeds around the dainty voilets come creeping
Now the garden grows, tended by the hands of my future children
And the roses have been prospering taller as each season turns
I can think about the time gone and wonder where I have stood
The laughter of the children in the garden in my mind are the sound
The sweet lullaby which sends me deeper into the past
And the future. And the shadows in my mind welcome me home
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