One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

McMurphy: Which one of you nuts has got any guts? McMurphy: That's right, Mr. Martini. There is an Easter Bunny. Chief Bromden: My pop was real big. He did like he pleased. That's why everybody worked on him. The last time I seen my father, he was blind and diseased from drinking. And every time he put the bottle to his mouth, he don't suck out of it, it sucks out of him until he shrunk so wrinkled and yellow even the dogs didn't know him. McMurphy: Killed him, huh? Chief Bromden: I'm not saying they killed him. They just worked on him. The way they're working on you. McMurphy: I must be crazy to be in a loony bin like this. McMurphy: I'm a goddamn marvel of modern science. [McMurphy is pretending to watch the World Series on TV.] McMurphy: Someone get me a fucking wiener before I die. Nurse Ratched: Aren't you ashamed? Billy: No, I'm not. [Applause from friends.] Nurse Ratched: You know Billy, what worries me is how your mother is going to take this. Billy: Um, um, well, y-y-y-you d-d-d-don't have to t-t-t-tell her, Miss Ratched. Nurse Ratched: I don't have to tell her? Your mother and I are old friends. You know that. Billy: P-p-p-please d-d-don't tell my m-m-m-mother. McMurphy: A little dab'll do ya. McMurphy: What are you doin' here? You oughta be out in a convertible bird-doggin' chicks and bangin' beaver. McMurphy: Is that crazy enough for ya'? Want me to take a shit on the floor? McMurphy: [about shock treatments] They was giving me ten thousand watts a day, you know, and I'm hot to trot! The next woman takes me on's gonna light up like a pinball machine and pay off in silver dollars! McMurphy: She was fifteen years old, going on thirty-five, Doc, and she told me she was eighteen, she was very willing, I practically had to take to sewing my pants shut. Between you and me, uh, she might have been fifteen, but when you get that little red beaver right up there in front of you, I don't think it's crazy at all and I don't think you do either. No man alive could resist that, and that's why I got into jail to begin with. And now they're telling me I'm crazy over here because I don't sit there like a goddamn vegetable. Don't make a bit of sense to me. If that's what's being crazy is, then I'm senseless, out of it, gone-down-the-road, wacko. But no more, no less, that's it. Candy: [innocently] You all crazy? McMurphy: In one week, I can put a bug so far up her ass, she don't know whether to shit or wind her wristwatch. McMurphy: I'm here to cooperate with you a hundred percent. A hundred percent. I'll be just right down the line with ya'. You watch. [The inmates are playing cards and betting with cigarettes.] Martini: [rips a cigarette in half] I bet a nickel. McMurphy: Dime's the limit, Martini. Martini: I bet a dime. [Puts the two halves onto the table.] McMurphy: This is not a dime, Martini. This is a dime. [shows a whole cigarette] McMurphy: If you break it in half, you don't get two nickels, you get shit. Try and smoke it. You understand? Martini: Yes. McMurphy: You don't understand. McMurphy: What do you think you are, for Chrissake, crazy or somethin'? Well you're not! You're not! You're no crazier than the average asshole out walkin' around on the streets and that's it. McMurphy: Why don't ya shut your goddamn mouth and play some music. [McMurphy, getting Chief into the basketball game] McMurphy: Hit me, Chief, I got the moves! Nurse Ratched: If Mr. McMurphy doesn't want to take his medication orally, I'm sure we can arrange that he can have it some other way. Cheswick: Rules? PISS ON YOUR FUCKING RULES!!!! Chief Bromden: Mmmmmm, Juicey Fruit. [About Nurse Ratched] McMurphy: Well I don't wanna break up the meeting or nothin', but she's somethin' of a cunt, ain't she Doc? Dr. Spivey: Well, the real reason that you've been sent over here is because they wanted you to be evaluated... to determine whether or not you are mentally ill. This is the real reason. McMurphy: Well, as near as I can figure out, it's 'cause I, uh, fight and fuck too much. McMurphy: Get out of my way son, you're usin' my oxygen. McMurphy: The Chief voted. Now will you please turn on the television set? Nurse Ratched: [she opens the glass window] Mr. McMurphy. The meeting was adjourned and the vote was closed. McMurphy: But the vote was 10 to 8. The Chief, he's got his hand up! Look! Nurse Ratched: No, Mr. McMurphy. When the meeting was adjourned, the vote was 9 to 9. McMurphy: [exasperated] Aw come on, you're not gonna say that now. You're not gonna say that now. You're gonna pull that hen-house shit now when the vote... the Chief just voted - it was 10 to 9. Now I want that television set turned on, *right now*!! [Nurse Ratched closes the glass window] McMurphy: You're not an idiot. Huh! You're not a goddamn looney now, boy. You're a fisherman! Nurse Pilbow: Don't get upset, Mr. McMurphy. McMurphy: I'm not getting upset, Nurse Pilbow. I just don't want anyone to slip me salt peter! [Telling McMurphy about Chief] Billy: He-he-he can't hear you. He's d-d-deaf and d-d-dumb. Chief Bromden: I'm not gonna leave you now. I couldn't leave you this way. Your coming with me. ~ Home ~ Movies ~ Songs ~ Anonymous ~ Women ~ ~ Friendship ~ Life and Success ~ Poems ~ Shakespeare ~ Star Trek ~