Roy: "WHO YOU CALLIN' PSYCHO?!"
Neighbor: "Can you get sick from drinking piss?"
Roy: "Yes, you can."
Neighbor: "Even your own?"
ESPN Announcer: "So Roy, where have you been for the last fifteen years?"
Roy: "Well, I uh, well, ya see, I uh... Drinking. Lot a drinking."
ESPN Announcer: "I see. Well, are you still drinking?"
Roy: "No. I uh... I put... uh... Why, you buying?"
Roy: I woke up early and took the liberty of milking the cow.
Amish man: We don't have a cow, we have a bull.
Roy: I'm gonna brush my teeth.
Landlady: "What is it about good sex that makes me have to crap? You really jarred something loose tiger."
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