Josh's Survey III
Here we are, with the Winter 2000 Survey by Josh! Having learned my lesson with the first survey and picking up a few pointers with last July's Brave New World, I managed to work out something that's short but fun.
Actually, most of it's not my work. I happened to find it in the newspaper and thought it amusing in its ridiculousness and figured that it was surveyable enough for me. I was having trouble creating something fresh, so I find myself lucky to have found this one.
On 13 January 2000, it was found, researched,typed sent out and put in the archives all in the same day. Just five hours now. The quickest it's taken me to do this whole thing.
So here it is: My newest survey!
Josh's Survey III
Greetings, my friends and associates. Welcome once again to yet another survey brought to you by Josh. Yes, it's that time again. Well, it's actually even past it. Time once again to present to you a brand spankin' new survey! I'm doing something different this time around though. I had barely begin my third survey when I decided that it wasn't going well. So I put it on hold. But just today, I was presented something in the local newspaper.
It seems that each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts a list together in a vain attempt to give the faculty a sense of mindset of that year's incoming freshmen. It allows them to try and understand their current crop of students. The list isn't very good. It presents a bunch of things that people born in or around the year 1981 didn't have or don't know anything about whatsoever. It's a bunch of crap, but here it is. Since this is now a survey, fill it out accordingly. Although not stated in direct questions, simply state whether or not you qualify for what's being stated.
This is copied directly, so I didn't add anything to it.
Although, I did search my books and references for the dates of everything, so where applicable I list the date for the event. I also added problem numbers to it for ease in using it.
Also, don't forget that the terms "them" and "they" refer to supposedly any given person born around 1981.
Have fun. : )
NAME:
DATE OF BIRTH:
1. The people who are college freshmen this year across the nation were born around 1981. They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan era (1981-1989) and probably did not know he had ever been shot (March 1981).
2. They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War broke out (in 1991).
3. Black Monday, 1987, is as significant to them as the Great Depression.
4. There has been only one pope (appointed 1978).
5. They were 10 when the Soviet Union broke apart (1991), and do not remember the Cold War (1946-1991).
6. They have never feared a nuclear war.
7. They were too young to remember the space shuttle [Challenger] blowing up (1986).
8. Tiananmen Square (1989) means nothing to them.
9. Their lifetime has always included AIDS (discovered 1981).
10. Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
11. Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums.
12. [Likewise] the expression "You sound like a broken record" means nothing to them.
13. They have never owned a record player.
14. They have likely never played PacMan and have never heard of Pong.
15. They may never have heard of an 8-track. The compact disk was introduced when they were infants (introduced 1981).
16. As far as they know, stamps have always cost at least 32 cents.
17. They have always had an answering machine.
18. Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels, nor have they seen a black-and-white TV.
19. They have always had cable.
20. There have always been VCRs, but they have no idea what BETA is.
21. They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
22. They were born the year the Walkman was introduced by Sony.
23. Roller-skating has always meant in line skating.
24. Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
25. They have no idea when or why Jordache Jeans were cool.
26. Popcorn has always been cooked in a microwave.
27. They have never seen Larry Bird play.
28. They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
29. The Vietnam War (1956-1975) is as ancient history to them as World Wars I and II and the Civil War.
30. They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran (from 1980-1987).
31. They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
32. They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
33. They never heard: "Where's the beef?" or "I'd walk a mile for a Camel" or "de plane, de plane!"
34. They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. is.
35. The Titanic was found? They thought we always knew where it was at.
36. Michael Jackson has always been white.
37. Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not groups.
38. McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
39. There has always been an MTV.
40. They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.
Well, that's it. Can you believe that?!? Jeeze. But, now you all know that you're smarter than a bunch of college professors in Wisconsin. I betcha they all think that this is the new millennium, too.
Hope ya had fun.
Don't forget about the Josh's Survey Archive page!
I'll be back with another survey, Josh's Survey IV: The Voyage Home, on July 2000. See ya then!
. . .
That was it. How'd ya like it? A mess, right? I couldn't believe that thing was actually written by college professors. Says something about Wisconsin.
And now for my favorite part of the archive page: The trivia.
This came out of page 10 of the Toledo Blade, 12 January 2000.
Problem 1: Reagan was shot on the chest and survived in March of 1981 by would-be assassin John W. Hinckley in Washington, DC.
Problem 3: Honestly, I'm not sure what Black Monday was.
Problem 4: Current pope John Paul II (Karol Jozef Wojtyla) was appointed pope in 1978 just after the death of Pope John Paul I (Albino Luciani),who spent only 33 days as a pope, being the shortest pontificate in modern times. Jonh Paul II hold the distinction of being the first non-Italian pope in 450 years, having been born in Poland.
Problem 6: If I recall, wasn't there a little threat of nuclear activity last spring?
Problem 7: Challenger exploded just 60 seconds after liftoff on 28 January 1986 due to faulty O-rings in the solid rocket boosters. They had frozen during the night and did not form a seal, causing the booster rocket to explode and take the shuttle out with it.
Problem 8: Tiananmen Square was the site in Beijing, China where hundreds of students were killed by the Chinese military due to their forming for a large rally to demonstrate a pro-democracy movement on 20 April 1989.
Problem 9: Acquired Immuno-Defency Syndrome was first described in 1981. This was after numerous cases cropped up and befuddled doctors. AIDS was finally figured out in 1981.
Problems 11-15: Yeah, like who hasn't heard of Atari, 8-tracks, and for cryin' out loud Pacman and Pong! Sheesh!
Problem 18: Actually, the first color TVs were developed in 1929 (really), but wern't perfected to the point that they could be put in homes until the '60's. But, the first color broadcast came in 1940. I assume that it was on a theater screen.
Problem 19: The first cable broadcast was in 1948.
Problem 23: Lest we forget that Johnny Carson was the host of the Tonight Show from 1962-1992, when he retired and Jay Leno took over.
Problem 28: Actually, "Jaws" is my favorite pool game.
Problem 31: Mork, the alien played by Robin Williams in Mork and Mindy came from the planet Ork in a large egg.
Problem 33: The phrase "Where's the beef?" is from a Burger King ad. "I'd walk a mile for a Camel" is from a Camel 'Cancer-stick' ad. "De plane, [boss,] de plane" is from... aww, jeeze... it'll come to me later, and I'll post it.
Problem 34: J.R. Ewing was a character on the television show Dallas. On the season's finale in 1980, J.R. was shot by an unseen source. Fans of the series waited in anxious anticipation all summer until the show's season premire autumn, when the shooter was revealed to be the character of Kristen Shepard, a love interest to J.R. The Dallas season premire that revealed Shepard as the shooter aired 21 November 1980 and is rated as the second most watched television event, the first being the M*A*S*H finale on 28 February 1983.
Problem 35: The ocean liner Titanic, was discovered by a joint American-French expedition on 1 September 1985, led by Dr. Robert D. Ballard of Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution, Massachusetts. The liner sunk after colliding with an iceburg 15 April 1912, with a loss of 1523 lives. Ballard's search was one of many attempts to locate the wreck throughout the years. The wreck lies under 2½ miles of water off the coast of Nova Scotia.
Problem 39: The first video played on MTV when it premiered in 1981 was "Video Killed the Radio Star".
BIBLIOGRAPHY.
The Toledo Blade
Edited by John Robinson Block
Wednesday 12 January 2000
The Timetables of Technology
By Bryan Bunch and Alexander Hellemens
1993, Touchstone
The Cambridge Biographical Encyclopedia
Edited by David Crystal
1994, Cambridge University Press
The Cambridge Factfinder
Edited by David Crystal
1994, Cambridge University Press
The Top 10 of Everything 1998
By Russel Ash
1997, DK Publishing
The Handy History Handbook
By Rebecca Nelson
1999, Visible Ink Press
I guess that's all I have for ya. Sorry. See ya in July.
'Night.
MAIN.
This page created on 13 January 2000.
