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A lot of times people think about what life would of been like if it werent all a lie, wishin they could of done things normal kids did, they try so hard to strieve and always seem to manage but through a lot of pain, their skys are never blue, their minds are never clear, too much thinkin bout wat their parents would of done to them, they never cared, they were just drunks wit no sense and of no recoginiton, these people believed life would get better, thought they'd have the chance, they see others having fun and them laying there, and everytime they think, something else crosses their mind, never did they believe in a million years they'd end up there in that hospital bed. Bridge: breaking down walls of life in the past, afraid to move on knowin what more to expect, living a life of distress when before it was all a lie. thinkin about all the times they sat by themself cuz no one cared, tried to understand why it was that way, people always wondering who they were they didnt socialize afraid of what they would say of all those beatings. bridge 2x. They never knew what life could be like, cuz everyday it was the same thing beating before work, beating when they get home, didnt matter how hard they tried, living day after day in a abusive home, cried themselves to sleep wishin they'd die, strieved so much to realize that they were stronger then all the rest, scared to tell all those secrets hiding inside afraid they mite be worst off then they really were, things never changed in that cruel home, took life as a lesson, lived up to their goal til the day they were crushed, every internal part of them was demolished still holdin on hoping fer a chance to live on, asking fer their prayers to be answered, so maybe someday they'll live a life of happiness. If all they ever gain is their full use back, things would be so much betta neva will be the lil fantastic people all those cites and towns known, Their up n tha hip living each day as a new start trying to start over wit a new life, tryin to find a new part, even if its all they get they kno god was there, thinkin bout the past aint gonna help them none, they just got nothin to see back then, needin to find a new way to strieve, they moved outta their crib at the age of 13 cuz nobody cared, now their livin n a ghetto full of gang members and knife bombers, tried crippin fer a while, ended up askin themselves why, couldnt be a gangsta if they couldnt do tha time, 3 years lata get a dollar fer a holla, they stabbed that bitch in the back fo hittin them and she pounded them back. things to think about why people killin, children askin wheres all the love in the world, whys their life so unfair. If all the peoples lifes in this world were just like theirs, they know they aint alone, they know they cant say their worst off, they've lived through so much crime, payed it 50 out there, now their tryin to live it up there they cant believe it turned out this way, got a job and a car cant do either, cuz of stupid macks that dont know what their doin, they blame themselves fer wat friends they had were killed even tho they weren't driving, they said when they died they'd go too, instead they lived on living a horrible life in that hospital bed. think about all the times they've had, now all the questions are, where is all the love in this world, people killin, people dieing wondering why lifes so unfair.
22 Holla
Cryin out fer a dollar, his moma got no scholar, she played screw up n high school, wishin she earned a dolla, ur fatha didnt get promoted he balled fer a bitch wit a gun, she shot his azz wit her 22, ur phat ass ran told da cops they didnt do shit, u cryed fer a holla, played a lil bitch til ur dick went numb, wondered around wishin u played more safely, u caught aids wit dat bitch u were fuckin ova on swindland ave, compton gangsters chased ur ass, u ran til ur feet bled, cried for sorrow, got no pity, no one has pity fer a white boy. Bitches, bastards, lil teeny miffen fuckers. Shot ya down wit a 22 holla bitch.
Growin up hard
lil kids growin up n da hard world, abused every day slammed into walls and bounced off the floors, skipped scool cuz their momma was a hoe all she did was bitch at them, they playd dos lil games til their mouth ran dry, all these lil opportunities towards nothin, turned them into a no one, friendz usin them, family hatin them, they are da lil kids wit nothin, wishin their life could be different, it aint like they asked 2 be brought here, wishin they would die, so no more pain could apply (chorus:) their fuckin losing it, everything they ever dreamed just turned into a relay, crying themselves 2 sleep, while everyone else actually had a life, their fuckin losing it, lil opportunities they couldnt even have. Their pops use 2 rape them, alotta times they was in da hospital, began to run away at da age 7 they said fuck this world they can live it up on their own, became a g-sta learned to rep on their own, denyed they even had a family, cuz all they were wore a bunch of fucked up hoes postulated in a whole of shit. They got no gimmicks, no holdin grudges They were a good ole ghetto run up a long the streets racin their cars they worked fer, got tonz a good friends, livin off da big world, satisfied wit a dolla, when they get a holla give it a minute think bout da day they ran up da bill of da 9/11 fright, beat up their mommaz b/f's they acted like a bunch of sissy's, their moma'z got scared ran and told da police they said fuck u all.
I love you Cassie, ur the best thing that has happen to me in a long time. I would give anything to be there with you right now holding you in my arms, and me telling you all the things i wanna do with you. I hope we always stay true to each other and nothin ever comes between us to where we arent together or friends. You mean the world to me and I never wanna fight with you cuz it would hurt me alot to know that i hurt you. I wanna be the best girlfriend in the world and do everything to make you happy. I am so happy that were together, u make me the happiest gurl alive. Right now ur the only reason i try so hard, u amaze me so much hun. It hasnt been long and it feels like forever. When we meet were gonna have so much fun. I love you so much Cassie and always will til the day that I die!!! I will never give up on you, and hopefully this lasts for a long time. You have really been here alot fer me through the hard times the past couple of days and losing u would be really hard. I will love you forever and I mean it and ill never hurt ya and I cant wait to spend time wit u. Your a dream come to me and ur everything I could ask for, or ever want. Your all I need to survive. I love you so much!!! mauhz ur awesome. I cant believe how much I love you. Im always gonna be here for you and I'll always be ur babygurl. Sorry fer the lil stuff I said that may have hurt you, but I want you to always know that im urs. I love you so much and I have no idea how many times ive said that, but ur the best and thank you for caring, it means alot to me! You can put all ur pain on me gurl and there is no website even big enough to cover all the stuff I love and wanna do with you. I love you so much!!!!
Good morning sunshine when the sun is up, on a clear blue sky you will act like a lover. When the sky is gray, good and the rain comes down, you will run for cover. Feel the heat, come out of cold, and your arm is touching me. Good morning sunshine, you are my only light, lying with me by my side, you keep me warm all day. Just stay with me. Good morning sunshine, be with me all day, just don't let the rain pass you by, when it is cloudy or windy and the snowflakes arrive, you somehow just make me, make me feel I'm alive. When you are in my feelings then you are like the stars fading away in the horizon there is a million streets leading off the night, waiting for sun to be risen. Hold it right there, let me take a minute of your time, to explain how I feel through these rhymes. I do the best I can, and believe me if I could IŽll build you a paradise with these two hands. The top of your skin, makes my body go numb, I'm thinking to myself, if my dream came true, or is it coz you never give me a chance to tell you how I feel, the moments we had were too precious. When it is cloudy or windy, please turn your face at me. Make me I'm alive. All 2 u babygurl!!!
For the ones who have been through a lot of shit in their life, til they sit and cry at night wishin they would die and sit and vibe of why it had to happen. Why they are nothin to you but their the fucking shit in their eyes thats why they freeze the moment try to own it, and hold on it, cuz they consider the minutes golden and maybe they'll admit it when their gone. Just let their spirits live on. There is more pain in their brains than the eyes of a girl inside of a plane that had been aimed towards the world trade center and their lives are full of empty promises and broken dreams.
They sit there as they think about all the great times they had and the tears they have shared, but their love has disappeared, but they still have the feeling that they need each other in life, the comfort that was once given and the ear you had once lended. If they only knew what goodbye had mean't when they said it, They may not be sitting here in a mystery today wondering why this had all happend. They think about the days that they told each other that love was all they ever needed to survive but now their gone and their sitting there livin in a dream that someday could have come true. They still love each other, still care for each other, and never will let each other see their tears even in the darkest scenes.
They never would've dreamed in a million years they'd feel so much pain or see, so many motherfuckin people who feel like them who share the same views and the same exact situations, its like a fuckin abuser marchin in back of them so many lives untouched, so much anger aimed in all particular directions that just spray straight through their minds and waves and plays, till it stays stuck in their head for days, who woulda thought standing in this mirror that their poppa would be reachin and beatin them and that they would fall to the floor with blood everywhere.
They never felt so much sorrow, so much of their life just come undone, its like everyone is fuckin tearing them up, pushin them down, fuckin them over, throwin them away. There ain't no point in gaining anything, cuz it will just be fuckin ruined again. Their friends seem to blame them, their parents don't understand them, their lives have went to hell. Dreams they've had will never come true, people just depress them, life just hates them, school is just a fucked up con, pictures don't show memories, gifts don't satisfy their game, tv is just fake, sleep don't help them cope, music they love, and life they tend to not relate. Pain they feel just gets worst every day, their mind is going crazy, their friends all think their lazy, their life is foolish and it is just one hell of a fucked up game.
September Eleventh 2001...
In school the place where a year ago we feared the threat of an attack from within, the staff and student body learned on september 11th that terror reigned upon our nation. With technology at our fingertips, we watched in horror as terrorists hijacked passenger airplanes and used them as weapons to destroy the World Trade Centers in New York City and the Pentagon outside of Washington D.C. Another Plane crashed in rural Pennsylvania without hitting its intended target. The rug of security was pulled out from underneath each and every one of us. But rather than run and hide, we stood united. With over 5,000 innocent people dead or missing, the pain of our grief was more than one could idly bear. Relief efforts were quickly organized and people responded in amazing ways. Red Cross centers were inundated with blood donors who waited in lines that stretched across city blocks. Business and individuals raised money and collected water, socks, gloves, and food. And a week later, when the fire still smoldered in New York City, something rose from the ash and destruction. Everywhere you looked, a grieving nation spoke through its colors red, white and blue. Flags became our unifying symbol and were displayed in cars, on lawns, and across buildings. Clothing pins and ribbons usually reserved for Independence Day were worn again. Candlelight vigils were held in venues from the Montrose Green to Yankee Stadium. The message was clear. We were changed on 9-11, but not defeated, and never more UNITED. I couldn't believe it. It's absolutely awful. I was scared for the people inside and sad for them. I was absolutely dumbfounded that someone would do this to America. I was totally shocked that they would have the audacity to murder so many people. It was the last thing I would expect to happen. I was scared. I don't want to go to war, the whole day I travelled from class to class in a sorta daze. At first we thought it was an accident, then the second plane crashed. It seemed like a movie and not real life. I also had an immediate fear of what was to come after this horrible occurrence. Something that I thought we were safe from has hit so close to home. I was also scared because I was going to be going on a plane soon. I wanted retaliation right away. Shock and horror... my whole sense of safeness was gone. My initial reaction was disbelief, but now I am sad and angry. I was thinking about all of the people who had just lost their lifes.
A New Beginning...
A new year, a new start, many things can change with just one little change in you. This year I think will be great cuz I can start over and feel that I can accomplish more than ever. Its my time to spread my wings and fly above the rest be who I want to be, live my life the way I want to and it all happens when you get the chance for a new beginning. A beginning to the start of the rest of your life... From now on everything is going to be different, because I aint a prep anymore, a lot of things will change, some of you may not know me anymore, cuz most of you knew me as a prep and well some just may just think its a joke but to the ones who really care, you can start ur new beginning too by just one little change in you.
