SURVIVOR
AFRICA
THE SITE WEBMAINTAINER
UNPLUGGED, UNCENSORED, AND UN-PC!!
(You've been warned. This is
all in fun, promise.)
-- "Here comes Jiffy Jeffy
Probst! My Thursday is now complete!"
-- "Why is everyone fighting
with Clarence over a can of beans? They want to have fun
gas-attacks too?"
-- "What was that Tom just
said?"
-- "Ah-hah! It's token
Tribesman Charles in his groovy party clothes for today's
immunity challenge!"
-- "Yes!! Time for the
traditional 'shot of the Africans mocking the dumbass Americans'.
Need to have at least a dozen of those per episode."
-- "No man can look dignified
while carrying a goat, splay-legged, in his arms."
-- "What was that Tom just
said?"
-- "Oh my achin'--- Will
someone get Big Tom a big shirt?!"
-- "Is it possible that Lex's
tattoos could be spreading?"
-- "Okay. Now Tom's pants seem
to be heading south. HEEEEELP!"
-- "Poor castaways. The
Africans mock 'em, their fellow Americans mock 'em... no win
situation, ya ask me."
-- "Wow. Brandon's real....
erm.... "flamboyant".... Aw, forget it.... he
practically rings!"
-- "Ethan's startin' to look
kinda biblical here. Facial hair reigns!"
-- "Hmmmm. Lex is trustin' his
gut again. Anyone ever told him that it might just be
indigestion?"
-- "Why, how nice! The immunity
necklace looks like a flea-dip cone. You know, the kind that you
put on your dog so he won't scratch himself?"
-- "Yep. Frank's talking with
the elephants, alright. Someone has got to get that man
a buddy out there.... Ah hah! BRANDON TO THE RESCUE!"
-- "Awww. How sweet. Brandon
wore his best skirt for Tribal Council this evening."
-- "Mmm. Ethan's got some damn
hairy armpits."
-- "Oh! Oh! Oh! Gosh... HAHA!
Frank's haircut!! It's like a crop of wheat growing proud and
tall in the center of his head. Hmm. The blight must have eaten
away the stuff that was around the edges."
-- "Why is Frank wearing
Brandon's skirt now?"
-- "I once had a leather pouch
for my jacks that looked a lot like Kim's skin on the 39th
day..."
-- "What was that Tom said?....
Pfft. Poor fella can't even spell Ethan. E-A-T-H-E-N. Unless he
was trying to say 'Eat Hen.' One never knows."
-- "Dang. I miss Ethan's
beard."