-----
THE PACK -----
Season
1, Episode 6
***Guest Fiver by Fat Mat ***
Buffy: (singing while skipping) La-La-La, I just love the zoo
--
Kyle & Pack of Kids: Hey Buffy, how ya doin'? -- Loser!
Buffy: Ok -- Who are you people and when do I get to slay you?
Kyle: Hey Lance, how ya doin'?
Lance: H-hunh?
Principal Flutie: What's going on here?
Kyle: We were just talking to our friend, Right?
Lance: (gulp) Uh, well --
Flutie: Ah! That's great... I'll just be standing over here
looking stupid.
Xander: I'll save Lance while you women stay here with Principal
Flutie.
Willow: (sighs) He's SO cute, let's go help him.
Zookeeper: Oooga -- Booga!
Buffy & Willow: YAH!
Zookeeper: Stay away from the hyenas. They take possession of the
weak --
Buffy: That doesn't sound too bad.
Zookeeper: -- Right before they eat them!
Willow: We'll be over here by Flutie.
Kyle: Look, Hyenas! Let's feed 'em some fresh meat --
Lance: Ah! H-Help!
Xander: Leave him alone!
Hyenas: *SNARL!* These kids seem pretty cool.
Xander and the Pack: (eyes Flash! green) Grrr...!
Buffy: So then Angel said to me --
Willow: Enough about Angel, I'd rather talk about Xander --
Xander -- Xander...
Xander: Hey ladies. (sniff) Mmm, you smell good!
Buffy: What's up with that?
Flutie: Catch that pig!
Herbert: (squeals) Outta my way kids!
Buffy: C'mere cutie. Aw, aren't you precious?
Xander: He looks quite delicious too.
Buffy: Xander is acting weird.
Giles: No he's not. He's just a typical moody teenager.
Willow: But it's not every day he tries to kill me with a dodge
ball.
Xander: (licks lips) MMmmm -- Pass the mustard.
Herbert: Can't we talk about this?
Xander and the Pack: (laugh viciously like a bunch of hyenas)
Flutie: You! -- I! -- The pig! - D'oh!
Kyle: Why don't you yell at us in your office instead?
Flutie: Sure, right this way. Now, as I was saying --
Kyle: Pass the ketchup.
Flutie: What the--? *ARGH!*
Xander: BwaHaHa! C'mere cutie!
Buffy: Ki-YAAAH!
Xander: OW! No wonder you can't keep a boyfriend.
Buffy: Stay here and guard Xander.
Willow: But I may still have feelings for him.
Buffy: (pulls out a stake) I can easily take care of that!
Xander: NO! She hates me -- Just go!
Buffy: Xander got possessed by a hyena, change him back.
Giles: Ok, sure. Uh... how?
Zookeeper: Perhaps I can help --
Buffy & Giles: YAH!
Zookeeper: Why does everyone keep saying that?!
Kyle: Will--LOWWWW...
Willow: Yes?
Pack: *GROWL!*
Willow: Eeek!
Xander and the Pack: (sniff, sniff, sniff)
Giles: Buffy, go get the Pack and bring them to the zoo --
Buffy: --while you prepare for the reverse trans-possession.
Willow: And what should I do?
Zookeeper: You can be the bait -- Er, I mean... my assistant.
Buffy: Come and get me you stinking dogs!
Pack: *GROWL!* Wait up!
Willow: Here comes the Pack!
Zookeeper: (walks out wearing face paint & witch-doctor
clothes) Oooga -- Booga!
Buffy: Now there's something you don't see everyday.
Zookeeper: Yabba-Dabba-Doo!
Xander and the Pack: (eyes Flash! green) Grrr...?
Zookeeper: GRAAaaaaarrr!
Buffy: HI-YAAAAAH! (flips him into the pit)
Hyenas: Thanks!! *Munch, crunch, slobber*
Xander: So... I didn't eat the principle?
Buffy: No, you only ate a pig.
Willow: And then you tried to sexually assault Buffy.
Giles: That's odd, you should be able to remember this.
Xander: Not if I use the Jedi mind trick on myself... *POOF*
There, memory's gone.
The little Grr! Argh! demon howls like a hyena while leaping
across the screen trying to catch a baby pig.