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The Top Ten High School Songs
the songs you know are about you but you won't admit it

Ah, high school.....dances, sports, girls, alcohol abuse and schoolyard shootings...the great memories we will have in our latter years when we look back on these treasured days (speaking of guns check out that picture of Oz! Oooo! Just kidding). The story of how I came up with this idea is pretty simple: I was sitting around one night writing an essay about Gulliver's Travels or something when I thought, "jeez, this blows like all hell." I started wondering, "is this what I want to look back on my glorious days of youth and remember? Always being preoccupied with homework and shit? NO!" With which I immediately stopped working on the god forsaken essay (consequently I failed....ah what the hell I would have anyway), but that doesn't matter-- We must live these days to the fullest, because they will be gone in a blink of an eye, and we will look back and say damn, what just happened? This is why I am honoring here those that have really captured the essence of what high school should be like. Most of these songs suck, but hey, it's the thought that matters, right? Enjoy

10) Youth of the Nation - P.O.D. This one is a bit dark, but it represents the realist's view on high school. The singer rhymes about how he got shot in school, about how a girl named Suzie turns into a slut, and how some kid named Johnny has no friends and shoots himself. it's actually pretty good. It kind of makes you wonder, what is happening to the youth of our nation? What's wrong with those damn kids? Why do they think they have so many problems? It kind of sounds like the writer is blaming society for all the shit that happens to 'em.

9) Song for the Dumped - Ben Folds Five What would high school be like without getting your sorry ass dumped once or twice? It would be a hell of a lot better, that's what. Nah, just kidding. Everyone needs to be dumped once in awhile. It builds character. So stop crying like a bitch you fricking pansies. Look on the bright side, at least you can check out other girls again. Or at least not feel guilty about it. This song is actually really funny, and as a matter of fact doesn't have anything to do with what I've been talking about so far. Apparently, this dude takes his woman out to dinner, and then she dumps him that same night. The chorus is what really makes the song though: "Give me my money back, Give me my money back, you bitch" HaHa. Definitely a song that belongs on this list.

8) Girls - Beastie Boys Hey man, I can't deny my inherit masculinity. As pointed out in American Pie, the point of high school is to get laid. This is the ultimate song about girls. I mean, dude, even if you are a girl you have to like it. "back in the day/there was this girl around the way/she liked my home piece MCA/he said he would not give her play/i asked him please he said you may/her pants are tight and that's ok/if she could dance i would dj/we took a walk down to the bay/i hope she'll say/hey you and me should hit the hay/i asked her out she said no way/i shoulda probly guessed her gay/so i broke off with no delay/i heard she moved real far away/that was two years ago this may/i seen her just the other day/JOCKIN MIKE D TO MY DISMAY!" well said, sir Adrock.

7) My Iron Lung - Radiohead Before any biased judgements are made, I would like to make one thing clear: this song is about YOU. I don't care who you are or where you are from. Radiohead knows. Well, admittedly this is one of the more obscure ones on this list. But I never said this would be straightforward did I. Well, basically the deal is, you do something, Radiohead gets on your nuts about it. But don't forget, it was society that devastated Thom anyway. So it's our fault in the long run. Don't say you weren't warned next time a Radiohead album comes out.

6) I Wanna Hold Your Hand - The Beatles What can I say, gotta give credit where credit is due. The Beatles were the grandfathers of all this utopian love music. This might be a little more middle-schoolish, but the innocence of it all is what we're focusing on here. What makes this song even greater is the fact that nobody can stand it. But somehow it gives you a longing for that wonderful feeling of the first time you held your little lady-friend's hand. Another great Beatles follow-up to this lovey-dovey mindset is "Why Don't We Do it in the Road."

5) First Date - Blink 182 Need I say more?

4) Smells Like Teen Spirit - Nirvana Now we are getting into the serious stuff. Now this one, gosh, even if we could understand one line of the song, we still wouldn't be able to figure out what he was talking about. But forget what Kurt might be roaring, listen to the music! The scratchy guitars are just shrieking with angst. On top of this all, Check out how Kurt would dress: Ripped up jeans, dirty old t-shirt, unkempt hair. It brings a tear to my eye...

3) Popular - Nadasurf This song is so great. It is the ultimate high school satire. For you heathens that don't get what I'm talking about, THIS SONG IS MAKING FUN OF YOU. It's hilarious too. The guy in it is giving some advice to girls for how to date guys or something. He proposes a "one-month limit," and suggests girls wash their hair "at least once every two weeks." Before leaving, he notifies the girls that "every boy in the world can be yours" if you just read his book, "The Teenage Guide to Popularity." The sad thing is, some people might think this isn't a joke. In fact many people might not. In fact, you probably didn't until you read that last sentence.

2) High School - Nerf Herder It shouldn't be any surprise that a song bearing this name found its way onto this list. The chorus of this song goes: "These are the things I wish I knew in high school." The rest of the song, well, the dude is telling us about stuff he wishes he knew in high school. A few examples? "Don't bother going to class, cos nobody cares if you cut." "Don't hold out for that one special girl cos she'll never have sex with you." "If you ask her out and she says maybe, what she really means is no way." Oh and I particularly like this one: "It's not smart to experiment with bengay on your nuts." I have to say that I'm glad this guy wrote this song, to steer us rookies in the right direction. Good thing I listened to this song before I bought BenGay!

1) Fight For Your Right - Beastie Boys First of all, I would like to apologize to all of you Vitamin C fans out there that "Graduation" didn't make the list. Let's just say it came in number 11 (not). But for any of you that didn't expect "Fight for your Right" to be on here, shame on you! This is the ultimate, most triumphant, indisputable high school song. It's the greatest. It's a message to all the kids (or "young people" for you dumb liberals), never to give in to "the man," always be whatever you want to be, and have fun doing it. Oh yeah, and FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT TO PARTY!

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