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A Real-Time Saga:
She's Not a Smoker . . . Right? (Part 1)

So the technical back-story of this is that it took place WAAAY before I place it, but I just thought the whole scenario was too good to pass up! This one should be okay, is pretty suitable for most viewers, yada yada yada. Just read the damn thing already!

Well, nothing worth noting has happened in the past while. School's gotten a little harder, days have gotten a little longer, ya know.

It was a late evening, the episode of "The Simpsons" kinda sucked, and I hadn't checked my mail yet. Luckily for me, the brothers were screwing around elsewhere. The older one was out at school (I am seriously NOT going to be able to handle post-secondary), the other was off at hockey. Too good, right? Yeah, that's why my mom was playing solitaire, I think. Before I got off the last couple steps to enter the basement, I heard the rampant clicking only the world's most addictive electronic card-game could cause. I hurdled onto the couch and read my English novel until then. Am I not the only one that's always surprised at how good those books always turn out?

A little while later I heard my mom walking up the steps. Just as I looked up from my over-creased borrow, my mom tossed me the now-infamous Panasonic cordless phone.
"If anyone calls, I'm asleep," she tells me, "go to bed soon, okay?"
"Can do," I reply. Yeah, like I'm going to sleep at nine! I hopped down the stairs and fired up the Internet. Right after that, I could hear the garage-door opening. So Dan's home now; better step things up now. Damn, too late. His 195-pound body came swinging down the stairs, "whooing" all the way down. HE scares me sometimes.
"I'm gonna need the computer soon, okay?" I'd swear I just did this . . .
"Sure, whatever . . ." He was walking towards the bathroom (he's gotta be the cleanest of all of us) when he suddenly U-turned back through the hall.
"Oh, Ern, one more thing."
"What would that . . . . ." and he let one rrrip! THEN he went back to the bathroom, laughing and "whooing" all the way.

That whole gassy-ordeal aside, ICQ popped online as I simultaneously brought up my e-mail. As I typed in passwords and the like, Jason messaged me. I haven't talked to the guy in about a month, so this was interesting:

Hey what up

Hey, nothin' much. And you?

Ya nothing happening

Oh well. "I guess I could always do homework, right?" Ah, screw it!

Ya so id you know that Jody smokes
(The hell? Oh, did, I see now. My my, Jason. A little late for telling bad jokes, don't ya think? Eh, might as well use it, lest I lose this conversation . . .)

Yeah, I heard. Don't know what to make of it.

Me neither

Guess we'll just hafta see what happens, eh?

Guesso

Yeah. So what've you been upta?

Not to much i'm getting all my friend sto believe that anothe rfriend is a smoker now so much fun

"Oh yeah, really funny . . ."

What you don't believe me
(What the suck? This is getting a little far-fetched . . .)

Seriously? I don't know what to believe now.

Why

. . . . . I dunno. I just . . . can't see it.

Oh i see or you don'y weont to believe it

I just don't know anymore . . . (shrugs shoulders)

Ho i see now

You do, do you? Or do you only think you do?

Oh i see it

Whatever. My brother needs to use the computer, so I'll see ya tomorrow.

I called the "gassy big kid" out so he could do his homework (spelt "online hockey-pool"). Well, Jason's typing might not be the best, but it really didn't matter, since the message was conveyed. I just don't believe it. No way Jody would take up smoking! She's WAY too smart for that! And yet . . . for some reason I'm not entirely convinced . . . . . Okay, it's given that Jason IS an ultra-liar, but then again, with him, you just never know.

I mean, there was this one time when supposedly he had a girlfriend half-an-hour out of town he met a little before November. No one ever met her (and some of us are still skeptical that she ever existed!), but then again, why shouldn't we believe him, right? Well, consequently, everyone was wondering about the whole Tina-Jason thing. It didn't really seem to click after Jason's "girlfriend". HOWEVER, the story (**THIS is a good story. Don't miss it!**) goes that they broke up soon after, due to distance and time and stuff, I think. THEN, during this Halloween party we all went to at Natalie's place (you remember her, right? I mentioned her over the summer, I think). Let's just say that, Jason & Tina, well . . . they had a fling. I'm not kidding, I'm talkin' serious face IN face! That whole thing kinda cut off a lot of space during that party.
Next day, no one would've guessed they had anything happen. Strangest relationship EVER.

Aaaaaaanyway, flashback aside, this was really bugging me now. I stopped to think about other "friends" that I knew that took up the cancerous habit. I was thinking that I remember one guy said he did it because "it relaxed him". What that tells me is that he really went to it because, well, he just had too much stress and couldn't handle it. Then I think about all the stuff Jody went through. All these guys just going all out for her attention, none of them getting anywhere, but none slowing at all . . . I mean, Tony & I never spoke of this stuff until recently when it all just came out. It was kinda messy, but I could kinda feel that well . . . . . he wasn't handling it well. That in mind, Jody also told me she felt responsible for his current state. Could all this stress have been enough to make her turn to cigarettes?

Of course not! That's absolutely crazy . . . . . isn't it?