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Time: 1988. Mason and Tori had traveled to a foreign tropical island to seek a quick divorce in order to get on with their lives. What Mason hadn't counted on was Julia showing up to surprise him. Because of this, Mason spent lunchtime tablehopping so that neither Julia nor Tori would know he was with the other. But Tori did find out, and Julia, in a rare display of insecurity, accused Tori of using the trip to try to win Mason back. In the heat of battle, Tori told Julia that the divorce was off, since Julia felt that Tori would be so underhanded. Alas, cooler heads prevailed, leading the former friends to have a real conversation and decide that they wanted to try and repair that friendship. Both decided, with some laughing, that since poor Mason didn't get much of a chance to eat lunch, that they'd spring for dinner. Then it was off to find Mason. Mason, unaware of the truce, was drowning his sorrows and wondering about his fate, while using the bartender as a sounding board. Here we have Mason's insight about his plight through the clichéd, though amusing, spilling of the guts to the bartender.
Island music is playing. There is a display of empty glasses on the bar, as an inebriated Mason puts some umbrella straws on top to finish off his creative masterpiece. Satisfied, he turns his attention to other matters...summoning the bartender.
"Camarero." Mason mutters. "How do you say bartender?" he asks himself. Trying again, he slurs, "Camarillo." He says another variation of the same word afterwards, but soon gives up and goes for the obvious choice: "Bartendero." As the bartender finishes cleaning a glass and goes over to him, Mason is pleased. "Oh, well what do you know? I guessed right."
The bartender stands in front of Mason. "Sí, señor?"
"Uno más, por favor." Mason points to the empty glasses, as if to emphasize what it is he wants. The bartender is quick to shake his head no. Mason tries again. "Come on, set 'em up, José."
The bartender corrects Mason. "Alberto."
With a sort of mini salute, Mason repeats, "Alberto. One for my wife, one for my baby, and one for...the lonesome road."
The bartender still refuses to give Mason another drink.
"Wh...What's the matter, Alberto? You run out or something?" Mason wonders.
With another shake of the head, the bartender gives Mason the obvious explanation. "I'm sorry. You've had too many to drink, my amigo."
Unfortunately for Alberto, Mason takes the amigo thing to heart, in his intoxicated state and decides to unburden himself to his captive audience, spilling his tale of woe. "Amigo," Mason reaches over to grasp the bartender's hand. "You call me your friend. I can't tell you how that touches me...in my outcast state. Have I told you my story?" The bartender looks at Mason warily as Mason still forges on. "I am doomed, Alberto, to roam the world with this divorce around my neck." Mason wraps a hand around his neck to illustrate his point. "It's choking me! And the only thing that helps..." Mason once more taps on the tower of empty glasses and umbrella straws in front of him. "...is this."
As Mason is spilling his guts, Julia and Tori silently come up behind him and watch, amused, as Mason keeps going. "You wanna hear my sad story?" Mason doesn't give the bartender a chance to reply. As Julia and Tori smile, and look as if they are silently giggling, Mason goes into the gory details of his messed up love life. "At this very moment, my wife, or I should say, my ex-wife, and my fiancé are up in a room, probably killing each other." As Mason says this, Julia wraps a friendly arm around Tori's shoulder and Tori pats Julia's hand with a grin. "That's why I'm getting embalmed," Mason relates.
At that moment, the women decide to make their presence known. "Look, honey," Julia interjects, "no corpse!" With another smile, Tori adds, "Just like old times, huh?"
A stupefied Mason turns around, shocked beyond belief at seeing the two women in his life acting like what they used to be and somehow were again...friends.
After seeing the impossible, Mason falls off the barstool and passes out, leaving Tori and Julia in a fit of laughter.
End
