March 6, 2000
***The Extreme Screen the backstage area where we see EMT's attending to The Rock. Triple H is there and he looks upset.***
Triple H: Man, what the HELL happened Rock?
[We see the EMT's start to stich up the gash over The People's eyebrow. The medic alerts Rock that they cant stitch it up with the eyebrow in the way. Medic #2 proceeds to shave the people's eyebrow off.]
The Rock: The Rock says THIS is what happened... The Rock had just pulled his magnificent 6 foot 5, 275 pound, frame out of the shower, The Rock was trying to locate the people's towel when some ROODY-POOH hands The Rock is towel, only it's over The People's head. This Candy-Ass then proceeds to HIT the People's Champion with a GLASS beer bottle. Hence you see The Rock bleeding, and THIS [Rock motions to slap the medic] Jabroni putting thread in The Rocks best feature...
Triple H: Any idea who did this?
The Rock: The Rock says IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO DID IT!! The Rock says it was Portal, The Rock says it was that dead freakshow Undertaker, hell for all I know it was YOUR MOTHER who did it. But it JUST doesn't MATTER. The Rock has a job to do tonight, and that's what will get done...
[The camera shows Rock walking off.]
[We go to the inside of the Midnight Mnistry's locker room where Synister and Paul bearer are BOTH slamming down beers, in glass bottles no less. Undertaker is on the phone.]
Undertaker: Don't worry Steve, I GUARANTEE X-Man has NO idea what we have planned tonight.
[Undertaker laughs as the show starts.]
[EWF Monday Mayhem 2000 starts up as we get live shots of the crowd and the pyro that goes off. We are introduced to our two color commentators, Shane Douglas, and Steve Albert (brother of Knicks commentator Marv Albert. guess we know who wears the DRESS in the family.)]
Shane: Hello everyone, what a SHOW we have ready for you tonight.
Steve: Thats right Shane. Tonight, we have FOUR matches from the "Tournement of 16" to decide the new HEAVYWEIGHT champion of EWF.
Shane: In addition to that, we will bring you one of THE MOST dangerous matches in the HISTORY of this company. A three way dance in a barbwire match. The contestants are Mike Angel, and the two men fighting to be the "TRUE Extreme ICON" Mike Rage and Chapel.
Steve: We can't forget our MAIN EVENT. The united team of Tommy Dreamer and the "X-Man" Xavier Corsica, go up against the BEAST of the Midnight Ministry... SYNISTER!!
Shane: But first up, we've got the CONTRACT match. Chase Michaels must defeat ONE of three men to get a deal here in EWF. Unfortunatley for Chase, those 3 men are Kurt Angle, Mad Dog, and KANE!
Steve: Let's go backstage to Sean Mooney who is live with Kurt Angle, Sean?
[We see Angle stuffing a bunch of 20's in his jeans, he's not even dressed to wrestle.]
Sean: Thanks guys. I'm here with Kurt Angle, and Kurt, why aren't you dressed for this evening?
Kurt Angle: Well Sean, It wasn't an easy decision to come to, but I have been ill all day, you know, feeling kinda GREEN. And showing ONE of the three I's, Intelligence, I'm going home, so NO ONE else gets sick... Thank You...
[Angle walks off.]
Sean: Ok... Lets go back to ringside...
Shane: Thanks Sean...
Steve: First out is Chase Michaels... You gotta admit, Chase looks a lot better since his days as an nWo2k superstar...
Shane: ...
Steve: Anyways, Michaels has a hell of a task to face next. A man who wants him DEAD in Mad Dog, and a man that just likes DEAD things in KANE...
Shane: Here come the killers of Chase now...
[Mad Dog and Kane come out to no music as Chase did. The fans give a HIGH heat reaction to Kane as he is a memeber of the Ministry.]
Shane: Chase should have worn track shoes... This is gonna be a BLOODBATH!
[Chase pulls out a pair of nunchucks and starts swinging them around. Mad Dog attempts to step up to Chase, but Chase strikes Mad Dog in the temple and he drops like a rock.]
Steve: Now that's not LEGAL! Where's the DQ?
Shane: We are the EXTREME, aren't we?
Steve: I guess the band plays on..
[Chase then attacks the ribs of Kane with the nunchucks. Kane stands like a statue, absorbing every blow Chase dishes out. Kane finally gets tired and wraps his hand around Chase's neck.}
Shane: CHOKESLAM!!!
Steve: Shane... Chase is back up...
Shane: Must be nerves...
[Chase deals a solid right hand to Kane, who goes over the ropes and lands on his feet. Chase makes a cover on Mad Dog, but gets tossed off before the 1 count.]
Shane: Oh boy... we got a Chase Michaels FIGHT going on... yippe!
Steve: Maybe not... Kane's got a sledgehammer...
[Kane slides back in. Chase turns around and Kane is standing in FRONT of him. Chase falls on his ass and slides backwards into the legs of Mad Dog. Mad Dog tosses Chase towards Kane, who swings the sledge into the stomach of Chase and Chase stumbles back to Mad Dog. Mad Dog punches chase with a stiff right hook, busting his nose and lip wide open. Chase then stumbles BACK to Kane who picks up Chase on his shoulder.]
Shane: Time for the TOMBSTONE!!!
[Kane drives Chase down with the Tombstone and the referee takes the slow 3 count.]
Shane: looks like no contract for Chase Michaels... THANK GOD!
Steve: We're BACK!! Here comes Hunter Sanzio with the lovely as always Neve... Hunter has been an EWF World Champion before, Test has never held a major title, but many favor Test to win this one... what do you think Shane?
Shane: They couldn't be MORE wrong. We were up close last week. We saw the CLINIC that Sanzio put on against Test's buddy Dreamer. Now even though Test has a better record versus Dreamer than Sanzio, I don't see any way Test has a chance...
Steve: Here comes Test. What a determined young man. Seems to be having problems with the woman in his life, Beulah, but other than that, this Kid was JUST AS FOCUSED when he beat FORMER EWF CHAMP Xavier Corsica in round 1. And Mr. Douglas, YOU said Test would lose that as well...
Shane: People saw last week... and they know what I said, so don't lie to them...
[The opening bell sounds.]
[Sanzio and Test walk up to the center of the ring and measure up. At 6'7", Test has a giant height advantage over Sanzio. Sanzio delivers a kick to the gut and then a snap mare on Test.]
Steve: The mat classic starts... Let's see if Sanzio is as savy as Shane Douglas thinks he is...
[Test rolls back and Monkey flips Sanzio. Sanzio charges Test, Test counters with a hiplock take over. Sanzio tries again, same result.]
Shane: STAY ON HIM NUNTER!!!
[Sanzio charges again. Test gives Sanzio his arm, attempting a third hiplock, but Sanzio counters with a reverse punch to Test's neck. Sanzio then slams Test's head into the Turnbuckle pad. Sanzio grips on a vice-like chinlock.]
Steve: I never said Sanzio didn't know his way around a ring... The Great ICON cant get that name by jobbing week in and week out.
Shane: Then how did Chapel get HIS name?
[Sanzio moves down to the knee of Test. He clips Test and applies a Half-Crab on the assaulted leg. He then pulls Test FAR from the ropes.]
Shane: Mat technician... hell of a move by Sanzio...
[Test powers himself to his feet. Sanzio falls flat on his face. Test works on the shoulder with a shoulderbreaker, then hooks on a shoulderlock.]
Steve: Looks like the tables are turned again huh?
Shane: Oh like when your Brother wore a dress and bit a woman, that was pretty cool...
Steve: Shut up...
[Sanzio uses a series of flips and rolls to escape. He then assaults Test with a series of kicks to the legs followed by a lightning quick snap suplex. The crowd claps.]
Shane: BOY! That was fast...
[Sanzio whips Test to the corner HARD. Test comes stumbling out and Sanzio lowers his head, telegraphing a backdrop. Test lynches up Sanzio's arms and sets him up for the "Cheat Sheet" (Pumphandle slam).]
Shane: NO NO NO HUNTER NO!
[Test nails the move but takes a moment to rehabilitate his back. Test then climbs the post.]
Shane: Get UP HUNTER!!
[Test jumps off the top rope to deliver the "Exclamation Point", but Sanzio moves amd Test hits nothing but the mat.]
Steve: Test is down...
Shane: Yeah Yeah Yeah!!!
[Sanzio stomps the back of Test. He then picks up Test and delivers a running Powerslam. The crowd starts to cheer.]
Shane: ICON leg drop, do it, do it!!!
[Sanzio starts to climb the post but slips on the second rope. He regains balance, but Test gets back to his feet. Test then suplexes Saznio off the top rope. Instead of going for a cover, HE runs over to the corner on the other side.]
Shane: Too long of a jump, he'll NEVER make it...
[Test leaps off the ropes and buries an elbow to the heart of Hunter Sanzio. The referee slides in..]
Steve: 1...2...3!!! Hunter Sanzio goes home, TEST goes to the semi-finals!!!
[Shane bangs his head on the table.]
Shane: I.... I.... Can't believe it...
Steve: Lets go backstage to Sean Mooney who is standing by with Stephanie McMahon and Triple H, Mooney?
Sean: Thanks, Steve I'm here with...
Triple H: Mooney, you shut up... Undertaker, you don't scare me. I'm gong to smash that nose of yours with The Pedigree, then if X-Man and Rage are lucky, I might just save Brenda. One thing is for sure... You best keep your hands off of Steph tonight...
Sean: Ok... Well, Let's gp to Ronie Garvin who is live with The Undertaker... Ronnie?
Ronnie Garvin: Thank you Mr. Mooney. I'm here with The Undertaker who is going head to head with Triple H and is gonna kick his ass... AM I right Undertaker?
[Undertaker grabs the mic from Ronnie Garvin.]
Undertaker: I can't tell if your brown nosing, just full of s---, or a combination, but whatever the case, you have LOST your interviewing prividge for this evening. Now screw...
Undertaker: Triple H... You are a pathetic piece of CRAP. Tonight you will step into the Web of Darkness against The Phenom. You will leave knowing the Midinight Ministry struck first blood, and someone will need to drain the venom from your ass so you can breathe to fight another day. As for Rocky, I can't imagine who would want to hurt him... but then again, I can't imagine who would dare save him... or YOU for that matter... The bell tolls Triple H. Are you ready to face me now BOY?
[Undertaker sticks the mic in Garvin's mouth as we go to ringside.]
["My Time" plays as HHH and Steph McMahon walk out. HHH looks confident. He pours some water on his head, drinks some, then spits it out. The two pace towards the ring.]
Steve: Shane, what do you suppose Taker meant with those words?
Shane: Hell if I know, I can't understand psychobabble...
["For Whom the Bell Tolls" plays as the lights go out. Undertaker makes his way out with Paul Bearer and Jezibelle by his side. His robe drags behind him. On the Extreme Screen the symbol of the Midnight Ministry pops up, surrounded by fire. The camera gets shots of some children covering their eyes.]
Steve: what an entrance... And that Jezibelle...
Shane: She IS a real looker though ain't she?
[As soon as Taker's robe comes off Triple H asaults him with a high knee.]
[The bell rings.]
Shane: Let's NOT forget the winner of this match faces either Silver or Danny Rage.
Steve: That's true, could be... it's a longshout, but... Could be Undertaker vs Danny Rage.
Shane: Bet $30, walk off richer then Bill Gates if Steve's right... But then again, he ain't been right once tonight.
[Steve Albert gives The People's eyebrow.]
Steve: Wait a minute... there is a situation in the back... Do we a have a camera back there?
[We see The Rock cornered in the center of Triple Threat's locker room by a snake. A very dark green rattlesnake has The Rock and Mad Dog making no sudden moves. The snake moves close and sanps and bites Mad Dog on the leg. A man burts into the room and stomps on the snake's neck, thus breaking it. The Rock doesn't see his face, he was busy using his cell phone calling for help. Mad Dog is unconsious so he didn't see the man either.]
Shane: Looks like someone foiled Undertaker's snake attack. I think it was meant for Rock. No one knew Mad Dog was there...
Steve: I think your right. But that man, who was it? From the back, it looked like Undertaker, but he's right here. Couldn't be Kane, Kane is with Synister and Brenda and Danny... I wonder who it was.
[Undertaker drops a fist after the tight rope walk. Triple H snaps Taker down by that arm and starts to assault Taker in the corner.]
Shane: This has been one hell of a brawl...
[Taker stumbles out of the corner. HHH misses a clothesline and Taker grabs HHH by the throat. Steph McMahon jumps on the apron. Referee is distracted, HHH low blows Taker. Jezibelle goes around the ring and pulls Steph off the apron, the two girls roll into the ring and Catfight. HHH whips Undertaker to the ropes, Undertaker comes off with a flying clothesline which wipes out HHH and The Ref. The crowd focuses on the catfight..]
Shane: Glorify the woman on woman violence Albert!
Steve: TESTIFY!!! AMEN!!
[A crashing sound comes from the PA. The crowd jumps as a song begins to play...]
Song: "People think they KNOW me, say I'm WOUND a little TIGHT... say I go in lookin for trouble, that I'm ALWAYS ready for a fight. But I'm just an easy going guy, not crossing any lines, I'm a caring individual, most all the time..."
[Undertaker and Triple H start looking around the crowd who is all standing and singing the song in unison. Undertaker looks scared.]
Song: "...Most all the time, try alot of the time, its just that, ITS JUST THAT, OH HELL YEAH!!"
Steve and Shane: IT'S STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN!!
Steve: He's coming right down the entrance way, looking right at Undertaker and saying some choice cuss words, this roof is about to come off.
[A security guard gets in Austin's way, but Austin throws a punch and the rent a cop goes into the crowd. Everyone cheers as Austin slides in.]
[Taker charges Austin but Austin leapfrogs him landing FLUSH on Triple H. He then starts punching Triple H with a vengence. The cheers quickly turn to boos. Bearer hands Austin a beer which he takes a sip of then pours it in the eyes of Triple H. Austin gets off and taunts the booing crowd. Undertaker walks up and gives an evil grin as he grabs Austin's beer and drinks it down.]
Steve: AUSTIN.... AUSTIN is part of the Midnight Ministry?
Shane: I guess we know where the SNAKE came from then huh?
[Austin slides out as The Ref wakes up. Triple H makes it to his feet but is still blinded by booze. Austin pulls Stephanie McMahon off of Jezibelle and gives Stephanie two middle fingers before a Stunner.]
Shane: Looks like THIS is the end of Triple H.
Steve: Synister and Kane are fighting off The Rock in the back...
[Undertaker buries HHH with a Tombstone™ and the referee makes a traditional slow 3 count.]
[Undertaker looks up and sees whats going on in the back as Xavier, Test and Tommy Dreamer run out. Paul Bearer and Jezibelle stand their ground. Undertaker and Austin RUN to the back. Dreamer punches Jezibelle in the mouth, Test and Xavier start pounding on Paul Bearer.]
[Meanwhile in the back, Undertaker and Austin arrive at the locker room and see Brenda, but Danny Rage is GONE!!]
Steve: We'll be right back with the Barbwire match...
Shane: Welcome back to Mayhem. Folks, we are about to see the MOST brutal match in the history of Mayhem. a Three way Babwire match.
Steve: First making his way out, the HaRdCoRe Champ, and one half of the "Tag Team Chammpions of the Galaxy", Mike Angel.
Shane: You gotta believe that Turner is CLOSELY watching this one... In fact, here he comes...
[Vince Turner makes his way out, chair in hand.]
Steve: Next out, "The ONLY Extreme ICON" Chapel, former EWF Extreme champion, now looking to kill two birds or pigeons as Chapel says, with one stone.
Vince Turner: Hello gentlemen...
Both: hello Vince..
Vince: Finally coming out here is Mike Rage, "The NEW Extreme ICON", member of the nWd, former champion in his own right, I guess, and an all around nice guy who lost his son. This should be a dandy...
Steve: Great job Vince!
Shane: Kiss ass...
[The Opening bell rings as the two nWd members POUNCE on Angel.]
Vince: Syndicate wants to play games? LETS PLAY SOME GAMES!
[Angel bounces Rage off the ropes, Rage gets stuck.]
Vince: That's gonna leave a MARK!
[Chapel starts kicking Rage and tries to tie up Rage in Barbwire. Angel school boy's Chapel but gets only 2.]
Vince: DAMN IT! STAY ON ANGEL!!
Steve: I think this was a bad idea...
[Chapel is getting thrown around by a Angelic suplex series. Rage untangles himself and starts beating on Angel.]
Vince: Thats good...
Steve: I have a feeling someone here is getting screwed...
Vince: Only screwing here is in this table... That was done when it got built a while back.
Shane: Who got screwed on this table?
[Steve slaps his forehead.]
[Chapel and Rage continue to assault Angel. Rage sets up for "The Rage", but Chapel clotheslines Rage and Rage is forced to dive over the barbwire to the floor in order to avoid getting tangled up.]
Steve: Angel is doing a hell of a job in there against to EXTREME ICONS.
Vince: You however... are not
Shane: Whoa! [Laughs]
[Rage pulls out Angel to the floor. Angel scrapes is face on the barbwire, but no blood, just a scratch.]
[Chapel backs up, and does a running dive onto both men. Rage goes and hides under the ring.]
Shane: Vince, do you hear that?
Vince: Hear WHAT?
Steve: Sounds like laughing...
Vince: Danny?
Shane: WORSE...
Steve: PSYCHOPATH!
[Psychopath slides out from under the ring with a barbwire baseball batt in one hand, and Mike Rage's hair in the other. Rage tries to fight him off, but the big man grounds Rage with a kick to the lower reigion.]
Vince: GODDAMNIT!!!
[Vince leaves the commentary position and pounces on Psychopath with a fury of punches. Rage picks up the bat and captain caveclubs Chapel's head. Chapel bleeds like a waterfall. Angel attempts to jump Rage from behind, but eats the handle of the bat for his trouble.]
Steve: I guess this IS the New Extreme?!?
Shane: NewExtreme.cjb.net, dont forget!
[Psychopath throws Vince into the crowd. He then attacks Rage who had the bat ready to attack Angel.]
Steve: Rage and Psychopath are fighting off to the back. Angel meanwhile is going to work on Chapel with the bat.
[Angel throws Chapel in and Chapel gets cut on the lowest rope.]
Shane: Oh! Chapel tossed into the corner. Angel stands, perched like Mark McGuire with the barbwire bat in his hand!
[Chapel stumbles out and Angel connects with a vicious clubbing to Chapel. Chapel drops like the economy. Rage makes his way back in the ring. Vince jumps the wall with a chair. The Barbwire ropes are destroyed. Mike Rage sets up Chapel for The Rage as Vince runs in with a chair. Chapel hits a low blow and shoves Rage into the back of Mike Angel. Vince swings the chair and almost decapitates BOTH Rage and Angel. Vince looks at Chapel and shrugs his shoulders.]
Shane: That sonnuva bitch Chapel is gonna WIN!!
Steve: 1...2...3!!! Chapel is the NEW Hardcore champ! Vince has won this battle!
Shane: But he's losing the war, Psychopath has Vince and he's bouncing his face off of anything made of metal.
Steve: Look at the bloodbath. Chapel and Rage are a bloody mess, Angel is barely scratched, and NOW Chapel and Rage are brawling again!
Shane: Luckily, here comes the rest of nWd to break this up... Fans, we'll be RIGHT back!
Sean: Hello people, I'm here with Danny Rage, who if he can get that leg of chicken out of his MOUTH will answer a few questions.
Danny Rage: I'm f---ing hungry dude, I ain't ate in days, what do you want?
Sean: What was it like to be in capture by the Midnight Ministry?
[Undertaker is standing at the back of the hall.]
Undertaker: DANNY!! COME BACK HERE BOY!!
Danny: Sorry! Gotta split!
[Danny takes off towards the ring, ready for his match against Silver.]
Steve: Here comes Daniel Rage, in a MAD rush. I bet he can't wait to get started with FORMER EWF champ, "The Real Franchise", Silver.
Shane: Real franchise MY ASS Albert! Everyone knows Shane Douglas is the REAL Franchise hands down. This guy who is on his way out is a tracing of what I am. He couldn't DREAM of being at my level, and if he did, I'd pour warm water on him so he pisses his pj's. I am the ONLY real Franchise, this guy just looks a lot like Jerry Lynn.
Steve: OOOOOKAY....
[Silver enters the ring and Danny attacks him with a violent temper. Danny continues pounding on Silver and The Referee doesn't stop him.]
Steve: Vince Turner must have the ref's on the payroll for this one.
Shane: I like this Rage kid, maybe he's better than his pops, who did the job before the commercial.
Steve: Because of VINCE TURNER!
Shane: Details... Details... A loss is a loss.
[Silver takes control and slows down the pace with a hammerlock. Danny struggles a little then subsides. Silver then uses a back suplex and grapevines Danny's leg after. The crowd claps for such a nice combo. Silver holds on to a shoulder an an ankle in an attempt to stretch young Rage out.]
Steve: ONE SECOND later, Silver gets control. These young guys don't have the patience to deal with such an athlete.
Shane: Your worse then Garvin...
[Silver uses a reverse suplex on Danny. The crowd begins to stand as Undertaker and Kane stand in the entry way.]
Shane: They FOUND HIM!!
Steve: Amazing dective skills... Danny is on TV... IN THE RING!!!
Shane: More HEAT in the back?
[We see Stone Cold fighting off HHH and stuffing Stephanie McMahon's face in a toilet. Rock has gone to the hospital with Mad Dog so no one is there to help HHH.]
Shane: I'm SURE there is more to mention, but the audio isnt working in the back.
[Danny and Silver are fighting on the outside of the ring. Silver hits Danny in the face with a chair, Danny rolls onto the announcer's table. Silver picks Danny up and locks on Mercury Rising. Danny drops to his seat and Silver bites his toungue. Danny spins around and grabs Silver, the announcers scatter as Danny executes "Skid Row" on top of the chair, causing the table to collapse. Silver lands hard the wrong way.]
Steve: This is BAD folks... Silver might be seriously hurt.
Shane: Silver gets rolled in. He looks out of it... What do you do in this situation?
Steve: What a sadistic bastard! Danny has locked Mercury Rising on Silver!!
[The Referee calls for the bell. Medics come running out from everywhere. We see Undertaker and Kane shake their heads and walk off. Danny celebrates for a second and jumps the wall where Jezibelle is waiting for him with a knife to his throat. Danny is recaptured.]
Steve: The good news is Danny get to face Undertaker in two weeks...
Shane: The BAD news is Danny has to face UNDERTAKER in two weeks!
Steve: The BAD news is Silver is leaving on a stretcher. He just gave us a "thumbs up" so I think he may be back in action... One day.
Shane: So, if The Rock went to the hospital, does that give Portal a bye to the next round?
Vince: NO, it does NOT, it just means he has an opponent tonight.
[Vince appears on the Video screen. Rock strolls in behind Vince Turner. He has a patch over his eye. The crowd goes nuts.]
Vince: Now Rock doesn't have medical clearance due to injuries, but Portal doesn't have clearance due to Mental problems, perfect grounds for a match... Good Luck!
Steve: Portal and The Rock coming up NEXT!
[Portal's theme plays as Portal walks out.]
Shane: Portal is the odds on favorite in this one, and the winner goes on to face TEST in the finals.
Steve: Don't look past The Rock.
["Hells Bells" plays as Triple Threat makes its way out. (Minus Mad Dog who is getting treatment for a snakebite.)]
Steve: Never leave home without the Triple Threat huh?
Shane: If you were Austin's Enemy, would YOU be anywhere he can kill you with no witness?
Steve: True...
Shane: Portal lost a very dear friend this week in Gateway. He was like a second family to Portal, it will be interesting to see how well Portal fares in here with The People's PIRATE, arrrrgh!!
[Steve Albert laughs.]
[The Bell rings. Portal makes a peg-leg charade and The rock laughs before he lays the SMACK down on Portal.]
Steve: Wonder what that Main event has in store, and what Team Dreamer/Corsica has in store for Synister.
[Rock punches Portal into one corner, Portal punches out and punches Rock into a corner. Portal whips Rock into a third corner, Rock counters with a clothesline.]
Steve: The counters in this match? This was supposed to be a high impact slugfest!
[Portal grabs Rock and starts gnawing at his patch. HHH reaches through the ropes and gives Portal a low blow. The ref admonishes HHH and Rock sets up for Rock bottom.]
Steve: Portal has just hit ROCK BOTTOM!!!
[The Rock stands over Portal. Slowly pulls off the elbow pad and does the motion for the peoples elbow.]
Shane: I hate this move...
Steve: HE MISSED!! Portal didn't move, The Rock just MISSED!!!
Shane: Portal rolls up Rock.... 1....2....3!!! Portal versus Test in two weeks!!
Shane: Now let me explain why it is two weeks. NEXT week we are having the four way dance for the TV title, which is between Stone Cold, Hunter Sanzio, Silver, and Flood.
Steve: We are ALSO having the Tag Team titles match. A gauntlet style match starting between Dreamer and Test vs Kane and Undertaker, and then Xavier and Mike Rage, and then Mike Angel and Psychopath.
Shane: and Finally, round 1 of the National title tournement. Triple H versus Sid and Synister versus Kane.
Steve: But Next... Dreamer and Xavier versus Synister. We'll be back to show the entirety of this match.
[We are back. The Entire Midnight Ministry is in the ring. A woman we assume is Brenda is tied to the Midnight Ministry symbol and Undertaker has a few choice words.]
Undertaker: Corsica... The Charade has gone on long enough. Tonight, you will either BEAT the man known as Synister, or we're gonna do something BAD to Brenda, REAL bad. Mike Rage, don't worry about Danny, he's in a place he CAN'T escape from. I cannot remove the vale from Brenda's face, but I assure you she hasn't been harmed. That vale is there because right now she is sleeping. When she wakes up, she will not know she is 45ft from the ground. Douglas, you are now FORCED to call a fair match... Come out here and do your job, BOY!
[The Midnight Ministry exits through the crowd.]
["Man in the box" plays as Tommy Dreamer and Xavier Corsica walk out. They both look determined. They give a hard stare at Synister who stares right back.]
Steve: Synister has the mic...
Synister: Come and get it... boys...
Shane: Sounds like Synister's voice is going. Of course it could be from all the yelling he does at Brenda and Danny. The man is a solid guard.
Steve: The guy is a BRICK WALL!
[Douglas enters the ring. The bell rings. Dreamer runs at Synister, but gets cut down with a chop to the throat. Xavier does the same, and gets the same.]
Steve: If you remember, Synister is a former tag team champion, BY HIMSELF!
[Synister starts stomping on Xavier and Dreamer relentlessly.]
Shane: Sorry to cut away, but we got MORE heat from the back...
Test: What the hell does BLUE mean?
Beulah: I knew you were blonde, but I didn't think you were that dumb...
Test: we're... we're... PREGNANT?
[Test grabs beulah and hugs her. Beulah pulls away...]
Beulah: Andrew hun, I don't know if WE are pregnant...
Test: Of course babe, I meant you. I mean its our baby, but you will be the one holding on to it...
Beulah: Andrew... I don't exactly KNOW if it's OUR baby. I do know it is MINE...
Test: WHAT!?!
Shane: We're back. My goodness. Synister has destroyed the team. X-Man is gasping for air and Dreamer is out after taking a chokeslam.
Steve: You know Shane, I am not so sure these guys are fighting the guy they prepared for...
Shane: Who ELSE could be that big and fit in that costume?
[Douglas looks up and sees his sister dangling on the symbol. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out some brass knuckles.]
Steve: Synister doesn't use the Tombstone!
[Synister prepares to drop Xavier with a Tombstone when Douglas punches him in the back of the head with the brass knuckles. Xavier slips free. Synister sees his head is bleeding and turns towards Douglas. Xavier pulls Synister around and nails him with Perfection personified. Synister is still on his feet as he stumbles into Dreamer who gives Synister the Spicoli Driver.]
Steve: That's gotta be it!
[Flames shoot up from the post. The lights go out. Undertaker, Austin, Paul Bearer walk out. Undertaker orders the symbol lowered and Xavier runs and kisses the vale of the victim before he pulls it off.]
Shane: THAT'S JEZIBELLE!!!
Steve: THEN THATS NOT SYNISTER!!!
Both: It's KANE!!
[The Midnight Ministry charge the ring and begin to beat down Dreamer and X-man. Test comes walking slowly from the back. Undertaker gets in Test's face, Test pushes Taker aside and helps up Dreamer. Test then punches Dreamer dead in the face, knocking him out cold.]
Steve: What the hell was that for?
[Test leaves the ring as the nWd comes running out. The "Mystery Guy" is with them. Triple H comes running out as well. Midnight Ministry bails as X-Man helps up Dreamer.]
X-man: Why did Test do that?
Dreamer: X, it's ok... I deserved it.
Flood: Everyone, I just want you all to meet my Brother, Hurricane. Rock, he says your welcome for the save.
Steve: So Hurricane is The Rock's savior. Undertaker still has Danny and Brenda, and Test and Tommy have a problem. We'll see you NEXT WEEK!
Shane: PEACE!
