Well, what would YOU call a group of women, and I don't want to hear any disparaging remarks about "hen parties". Come to think of it, though, what's wrong with hens? They are pretty independent, they run the barnyard, they can find food for themselves and their chicks in the most remarkable places, and they have natural instincts for protecting their young. And what about eggs? Even the Psalmist asks God to "hide me under the shadow of your wings."
But this is about women; not livestock. I have just finished a wonderful three weeks in an incredible class, which I have already raved about. Even though the class, and the professor, were outstanding, what stands out in my mind now that I have a few day's distance from the experience, is the women with whom I bonded.
I was a young mother, happy in her traditional role, when all the hullabaloo about the women's movement began. It took me a while to grasp the import of all the hype, but not long after that I became a raving feminist myself. In a quiet sort of way; no marches or bra-burning, although I would have marched if I didn't have children at home, mine and other's.
So I have been convinced about the power of the sisterhood for a long time. Now, I think, the young women don't realize how much they have to thank those brave pioneers for, nor realize just how much grief the women had to endure to get some basic rights. But this entry isn't really about that, either.
I had to start there because it IS about how the women's movement has freed us to be friends. And unless you were there, in the 50's and early 60's you may not understand what I am saying. But, you see, in the "old days", our lives were governed by what the male world said, not only in the larger life but in our homes. This set up a natural competition between women for the attention of men. Even among "best friends", there was the unwritten law of the jungle. Consequently, women's friendship, except for a lucky few, was shaky. A simplistic example is that if you were invited to the movies by a BOY, you didn't hesitate to break a date with your female friends and leave them in the lurch.
I believe that it is rare these days, except maybe in some circles, for a girl to go to college to get her "Mrs." degree. It was all too common in my day. In fact, even very bright girls were encouraged to go into business school to become a secretary, because that was the best place to meet eligible men.
Now to the point: these past three weeks, a small group of us women, all from different denominations, have begun and nurtured a true friendship. Most of us were in the Islam class, which made it easier to be in contact with each other. However, even the two who were taking a different class joined us when their schedules allowed. During the regular semester, we go separate ways, as most of us are commuters.
These three weeks found us cooking together, eating together, hanging around in our bathrobes, watching a "lawrence of Arabia" video, and studying together. We shared, as women do, our lives, our hopes, our dreams, and supported each other in our struggles to get our papers done. We learned each other's histories, talked about our "calls", and generally enjoyed each other's company.
We also joined together to worship, sometimes in the chapel, sometimes in my rooms, sometimes in the kitchen. As we read the old prayers in unison, listened to the Word of God read by one of us, and prayed our individual intercessions, we became a little closer.
The last week, at our trip to the Mosque, which will have to be another entry, the professor gave us a list of 25 questions (most of which we had never heard about) and told us that 5 of them, plus 2 for bonus points, would be on the final the next day. Panic set in, and one of the women suggested that we each take a different question and research it and then E-Mail it to everyone else. She organized this, became the "Postmaster", and we were off.
Meanwhile the little group in the dorm began to share what they were learning in their research. The next morning, armed with all these questions, a group of us got together, 7 women and one brave man ("Don't worry," he said, when things got a little carried away, "I grew up with 4 sisters."). We spent two solid hours reading the research aloud, discussing it, hashing it over, practicing what one might say in an essay, and LEARNING! We could never have done it alone. Never.
In class, later that day, our study group wrote fast and furiously, because we knew the material. We passed in our papers and gave a communal sigh. We had done it! Six of us went out to dinner that night, loathe to part after our intense experience. We have promised each other that we won't let our various schedules get in the way of eating together at least once a week. We hated to say goodbye, even though we were all anxious to get back to families.
Yesterday morning, there was an e-mail from one of them to the rest of us, just touching base. It was a powerful three weeks in so many dimensions. The most lasting will be the love and support we will feel from each other the rest of the year, and for those of us who won't graduate this spring, the rest of our seminary time.
Life is Good; thanks be to God! Amen
1:10 PM
I really should be putting together a shopping list for favorite grocery store, but I waited too long to claim the computer yesterday, and never got it. DB is working on taxes, and I don't dare interrupt when that is happening. So, first things first: an entry and then shopping. (And speaking of shopping, I don't remember if I wrote that I've found the mother ---literally---of the store I am so enamored with only two miles from the seminary! I love it! Not more than my local one, which I know like the backof my hand, but certainly more than any other supermarket. The deli section alone is 1/3 of my store. I love to go there and just gawk and sample ---everyone is very generous about giving you a "taste".)
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