I was so proud of my teens today. We hosted the ECS coffee hour after the 10 o'clock service. ECS is the Episcopal Community Services drive, similar to, but very different from Catholic Charities. I baked cookies all afternoon yesterday, and the kids decorated the coffee "bar" in the undercroft with crepe paper streamers, balloons, and signs. They helped pour coffee and tea, and wielded mean dish towels during cleanup. The campaign features a lovely picture of a child with bubbles, so I bought little bubble jars for the younger children, and the teen boys had a ball helping them blow bubbles.
The boys were pretty wound up during Sunday School earlier. Poor Kathy had a hard time leading the lesson. She is the only girl in the class, and has a good self-image, but 5 rowdy teen boys were a little too much for her. I finally stepped in and pulled them together. They are very respectful of me, and settle down quickly when I ask them to. Generally, I let them horse around a bit, as they come from several schools in the area, and are only together on Sundays. They get along well; they have known each other since nursery days.
I think it may have been the sun, after many days of snow showers and snow storms. The sky was absolutely, perfectly blue today, without a cloud. After yesterday and last night's storms, the snow and ice sparkled in the sun. It even warmed up some in that lovely sun. But tonight it will drop into the low teens. It is already very cold, under a cloudless night sky.
Mr. Priest told the congregation today about my plans. There was a warm and loving response. Only a few people realize that it means I will no longer be around at St. Luke's. They will figure it out when the article comes out in our newsletter.
My daughter is worried about my being too busy to garden, visit her, and have a retirement. She is right that I will be very busy. I have no illusions about that. I will have many, many pages to read, papers to write, and duties at church. And it won't be as easy as it was even 16 years ago. However, there will be other payoffs besides the end goal.
I will be a little freer to travel to see her. And the summer after my first year, I shouldn't be as busy as this summer. Although, if there are summer classes, I may take them, just to shorten the seminary time a little. Two summers of classes could take a semester off my program. The seminary is very tiny, however, and may not have enough students to run a full summer program, in which case I will have some time off.
I should have most of January off, too. If we have enough funds, we may go on a long trip then. If we don't, I will have some time to spend at home and visiting special people, like daughter and family.
I know it's hard for my family, although not as hard as my undergraduate degree was. But I've always been busy, either with work outside the home, school, gardens, quilting, volunteering, consulting. I don't think it will be much worse than all that. And I come from a family that works hard. I admit I love lying around, reading, writing, walking, but whenever I have taken the time off to do that, I have found something to do that filled my days to overflowing.
She's right about wishing we were closer geographically. I have the same regret that we don't live in the same town. I miss so much with the miles between us. There is a family in town with three sisters who lunch together often, and, when she was alive, at least weekly the three were in one of our local eateries lunching with their mom. There were times when I hated them, and I always envied them. But those sisters have other problems that I wouldn't want to have. My life has been so full and so rewarding, that I don't waste a lot of it with regrets.
And I guess that is one of the motivations behind this need to pursue a role in the Church. I have been so blessed, I need to give something back. And being able to offer the Sacraments to others seems to be what I have been working towards all my life. Each step along the way pulled me closer to the center of my faith. Now I want to help others make that connection. And the connecting glue is the Eucharist, and the other Sacraments.
Especially, I want to bring that connection to families that haven't had the benefits I have had. It's the best way I know to live out my faith.
It's funny that Lyra's lament about not being able to learn how to retire if I can't model it for her is the same refrain I sang to my grandmother, the indomitable Jenny. "Grandma, how am I ever to learn how to rock away my old age if you are always on the go?" I asked her one day. This was the same day, when she was 92 or 3, that she tottered into the bedroom and came out triumphantly CARRYING her new walker. "See what the doctor got for me?" she said proudly. She kept it in a place of honor in her bedroom, but never got the point that she was to USE it.
As for me and DB; we have climbed many mountains together. We will conquer this one together, too. We have always been able to enjoy the moment. That won't change.
Life is good; thanks be to God. Amen
8:06 PM
Just came back from our gourmet restaurant in the Village; DB took me out for congratulatory drink and dessert. It was very quiet there, and very relaxing. I am now sitting at the computer in the glow of the "grow light", which is coaxing my baby tomatoes along.
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