Fr. J's wedding was beautiful and moving. It took place within the Eucharistic service, rather than the service being tacked on at the end like an afterthought. 15 minutes before the processional, the prelude included an organ piece, a reading from Madeleine L'Engle's An Irrational Season to explain how the bride's art relates to her spiritual life and to the marriage, a violin solo by the bride's son, a second reading explaining what the priesthood means to Fr. J and what it will bring to the marriage, and then a choir anthem. It all tied together wonderfully; not surprising with Fr.J and his beloved in charge!
A reception in the lovely side yard of the church, and a chicken barbecue later on the river at Sweet Briar College, completed the festivities. Except for:
The 10 of us from our church gathering back at the Inn for wine, cheese and crackers, grapes, and lots of laughter. The flying 4 had made it safely, and the 87 1/2 year old gal for whom this was her first flight (and in a small plane at that), had a wonderful time.
It was a long ride home the next day, but DB and I were a little giddy from the celebrations and our Anniversary, so it went smoothly. We went out to dinner when we finally got home, for a quiet celebration of our own. 45 years together in this marriage; we've been a couple for 48 years. We've gone from young love to cherishing. And romantic love? Ahh! DB is more romantic now than he ever was as a young man. He is the one, after all, who tried to get our priest to let him have a stand-in so that he wouldn't have to attend the wedding. It didn't work, of course, but he did get his way about staying at the reception for only 20 minutes.
I know, I know, it was rude and crass, but I knew he'd eventually grow into his potential, and I was willing to wait it out. There were times I despaired, but by 10 years of marriage, he had matured. The romantic part came much later. As for me, I was always sloppily emotional, and that hasn't changed much! He tolerates that much better than he did, however.
ALWAYS he has been there, steady, working hard. And inspite of the ups and downs, we have always been able to communicate, even if it was only about our daily lives. Sometimes confrontations have been painful, mostly because I don't confront easily, and that leads to resentment on my part and bewilderment on his. Now I'm better at addressing things before they get too bad, but there have been times when I just smolder until the volcano erupts. I wish I could change that.
Anyway, it's been a good marriage, no, a GREAT marriage. We have moved closer and closer. He has always been my best friend, and that hasn't changed at all. I think I finally know what the marriage vows are all about. I listened to them with a fresh ear the other day, and "til death do you part" moves me to tears with all its implications.
We have a new chapter facing us. The Discernment Committee will help to make it a little clearer, but mostly it is pretty muddy, full of "what if's", and " do you really's". But we are together and that allays some of the trepidation. I wrote in my paper journal, "45 years of a happy, Christian marriage." That says it all, I think.
1:28 PM
I have a few minutes before I have to scurry around to leave for the airport. I am all packed, have DB's dinner simmering on the stove, and have a few little things that have been nagging at me.
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