Chapter Two: What Comes In-between
Brian was killing me at hang-man. I can never guess his words, I mean who the heck would use beatitude? Brain, that’s who.
“Nick?”
“Just a minute.” I almost had this one.
“Nick.”
“h?”
“It’s Bible, Nick.” BIBLE? Who ever guesses B!
“Can’t you do anything besides religious stuff?”
“It’s OK to be a virgin.” Talk about changing the subject.
“Let’s play again. But no religious stuff.”
“Nick...”
“How old were you?” I might as well go with the flow. Once Brian gets set on a topic he’s worse than those little dogs he likes. He says he wants to get a Chihuahua as soon as we get home, but I’m hoping for something more attractive. A one-eyed lizard with mange should do it.
“Let’s not get into that.”
“You were 16, right?”
“Everyone does it in their own time.”
“I see.” An early sixteen.
“It doesn’t matter what I did when. Or what AJ did when. Or what Kevin...”
“Me what?” Great. My humiliation can now be spread throughout the group.
“Nothing. AJ’s just been teasing Nick.”
“About what?”
“NOTHING.” Yelling was not a good idea. Both of us yelling at the same time was an open innovation.
“Right. HEY, AJ!” Great. Now my humiliation can be spread throughout the bus.
“That’s my name, don’t wear it out!”
“Kevin! Just leave it.” Brian should know better. Kevin may be his cousin, but when he smells blood all ties are forgotten.
“Like he let Cecilia and I alone last weekend?”
I guess I shouldn’t have put the superglue on the chair-seat in Kevin’s hotel room. Being cut out of his pants interfered with his “smooth moves.” Personally I think it helped. Cecilia said she hadn’t laughed that hard in years. And besides, Howie said it was no great loss, those pants were ugly.
“Howie said those pants were ugly.” For some reason I thought this would help. I should never reason.
“Really? Hey, Howie! Come here.” Great. Now my humiliation can be spread throughout the Spanish-speaking world.
“What’s up?”
“Brain and Nick are having a conversation and the little buggers are leaving us out.” Kevin sounded so put upon. I hope someone puts him in a coffin and lays dirt upon it.
“Guys,” Howie broke into his ‘let me fix things’ mode. “...we are a group. We SHARE things. Right AJ?”
“Yea. Give.”
“My feelings exactly.” Kevin gave us his ‘all for one’ stare. “What’s up guys?”
“I’m leaving.” I thought it best to make a break for it.
“Were on the bus.” Kevin is very good at Geography.
“I’m getting off.”
“It’s moving.”
“I’ll jump.”
“It’s going over 60.”
“I’ll jump fast.” Not fast enough. Kevin grabbed me by the back of my neck. “Brain!” No help there. Kevin had him as well.
“OK guys. Spill.”
“No.” Brain was getting pissed. “He has a right to his privacy.” Brian! Don’t say that. It’s like leaving a blood trail and telling the vampires not to follow.
“Does this have anything to do with Nick being a virgin?” I hope AJ wasn’t expecting an answer. Everyone was shocked into silence. I wish they had been shocked into blindness, but no such luck. They could all see, and apparently they wanted to see me.
AJ was looking smug, the rat. Brain looked embarrassed for me. Howie and Kevin looked, normal. Not a smidgen of surprise could be seen on their faces.
“So?” Now AJ looked surprised at Howie’s question.
“So? How can you say so?”
“So. See? I said it again.” Now Howie looked like he was having a good time. It’s not often he gets to be the smart-ass. “Why does it matter?”
“WHY DOES IT MATTER?” It would seem this issue was one of great importance to AJ.
“Yea.”
“Yea!” Brain jumped on the bandwagon. “Why does it matter?”
“He’s 16, that’s why! He’ll be seventeen next month and he’s still doing the happy hand-dance!”
“SHUT UP!” Thank you Brian, but I can look embarrassed for myself.
“Like you never do it.” Maybe Howie was on drugs or something.
“Excuse me?” Now AJ looked embarrassed. And mad. Maybe Howie should think this through.
“Cut it out.” Brian glared at the guys. “And Kevin, stop laughing! It’s Nick’s business, so but out.”
“Oh come on Nicky.” Kevin, who had been doing a hyena impersonation, decided to make all nice. “Where’s your sense of humor?” I must have left it in my other pants.
“Excuse me.” I jumped over the back of the seat and headed for the bunks.
“Nick! Don’t run away!”
“Back off Kevin!” Brian was spoiling for a cousin fight.
“You baby him.” And Kevin was close behind.
“You treat him like crap!”
“Easy man!” For some reason AJ hates it when Kevin and Brian fight. I think he hates to see blood-relatives go at it. “We were just teasing. We didn’t mean anything.”
“You always...” That’ all I heard. I had made it to my bunk and crawled in, pulling the covers up to block the sound. Sometimes I really hate the guys, or at least the way they treat me. And I’m not a baby, right Bookie-bear? No comments from the gallery, please. Besides, my sister Angel gave him to me. When your friends are treating you like crap and your family is an ocean away you have to make do.
“Nick?”
“Go away Howie, I’m taking a nap.” Bookie and I are tired.
I guess Howie was as well. He pulled open the curtain and crawled in, pushing me against the wall. Good thing I had Bookie to cushion my ribs.
“Don’t let them bug you.”
“I’m not. I’m just tired.”
“I was nineteen.”
“You?”
“Nineteen, my first time.”
“NINETEEN!”
“You don’t have to shout it! But yea, I was.”
“Why?”
“Why?” Howie almost choked laughing. “Well, who knows? That’s just when it happened. So it’s fine. You do it in your own time and don’t let anyone pressure you.”
“Does AJ know?”
“Hell no! What, you think I’m a masochist?”
“I see your point.”
“And about that other thing, just because a guy is not a virgin doesn’t mean he puts the happy hand-dance to rest. So don’t be embarrassed.” I won’t. And when was the last time you washed the hand that’s on my spare pillow?
“Was it nice?” I might as well get as much info as I could.
“You mean...oh, my first time.” Way to show that intelligence, Howie. “In a way.”
“What’s that mean?”
“It’s hard to explain, but ...”
“Yea?”
“Nick, I think maybe you should ask ...”
“Who? Brian won’t ever talk about it and I don’t have an older brother. That leaves Kevin and AJ!” If those were my only options for information I’d have to die a virgin! Howie seemed to grasps my situation.
“It was....awkward. Not bad awkward. Just ...”
“How can awkward not be bad?”
“It’s not something you can explain. How it was for me won’t be how it is for you. Don’t worry and don’t sweat it.”
“Howie?”
“Yea?”
“What if ...”
“What if what?”
“Swear you won’t tell?”
“Nick.”
“Swear.”
“Fine. Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye.” Good. Now I could trust him.
“What if ...” I dropped my voice to a whisper. “...I don’t know what to do?”
“Nick?” Howie looked .... I don’t really know. I’ve never seen that facial expression before. “Are you kidding me?”
“What do you mean am I kidding you?”
“Did you read that book Kevin gave you?”
“Yes! I mean I know what to do in
the technical
sense, but that’s not reality, right?”
“Yea.” Howie sounded so relieved. “It’s not,
but it’s basically the same. Just let her lead, that’s
all you have to remember.”
“What if she doesn’t know what to do?”
“Do you plan to sleep with someone at least your age?”
“Hell yes!” I’m no pervert.
“She’ll know.” Well. Thank you. “And Nick? Can I give you ONE little bit of advice?”
“Sure Howie.”
“It’s time you got rid of that bear.”
“Howie..”
“Nick, 16 almost 17 year olds don’t sleep with bears.”
“I don’t sleep with the bear! He stays in my trunk most of the time! But Angel gave him to me and ...”
“I know. She asked you to keep him always and think of her whenever you see him. That’s all good Nick, but it’s balancing on the edge of weird now. You are too old to have a bear.”
“AJ has a blanket.”
“Well .... you have a good point there.”
“Yea, and it was HIS blanket. At least this was my sisters bear.”
“Sleeping with your sister’s bear is not normal.”
“You read too much into stuff. And I DON’T sleep with the bear!”
“You sleep with the light on.”
“Just the bathroom light. AND not when I room with you.” The creep wouldn’t let me.
“I can’t sleep with the bathroom light on!”
“I can’t sleep when you snore!”
“Fine. I’m outta here.” So much for the Nick/Howie moment.
Anyway, I took a nap ... with Bookie at the foot of the bed. Somewhere between where ever we were and where ever we were going I considered the fact that it might be time to make some definite steps towards adulthood. I’m not sure what they should be. Maybe I’ll make a list. Yea, my top ten things to do before I turn 17. Let’s start at the bottom. Number 10, get rid of bear. Number one, loose virginity. Now all I have to do if figure out what comes between.