Hello! Welcome to the Psychiatric
Hotline......
-
If you are obsessive-compulsive,
please press 1 repeatedly.......
-
If you are co-dependent, please
ask someone to press 2.....
-
If you have multiple personalities,
please press 3, 4, 5, and 6......
-
If you are paranoid-delusional,
we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so
we can trace the call........
-
If you are schizophrenic, listen
carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press........
-
If you are manic-depressive,
it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer......
-
If you are anxious, just start
pressing numbers at random.......
-
If you are phobic, don't
press anything......
-
If you are anal-retentive, please
hold.
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