Live! from Las Vegas

Vince's yells could always be expected, but still, when they were especially loud, they were always somewhat of a shock.

"MICHAELS!! GET IN HERE RIGHT AWAY!!"

"What's wrong with Vince today?" Stanley asked Jay.

"Who knows?" Jay replied. "I'd better go see what he wants."

"This kid named Tim keeps asking for his godfather!" Vince said angrily to Jay.

"What's so bad about that?" Jay asked. "I don't get it."

"That's not the crazy part," Vince replied. "He also claims his godfather is a desk!!!"

Jay looked down at Vince's oak desk. "A desk?" he repeated.

"THAT'S RIGHT!!!" Vince yelled. "It's ridiculous!!"

"How old does this kid sound?" Jay asked.

"Maybe about four or five," Vince said after a moment's thought.

"In that case, I'm sure it's just the usual kid's imagination," Jay said.

"You should listen to him talk!" Vince snapped, throwing the phone receiver to Jay. "Here! See if you can talk some sense into him!"

A young voice wafted through the receiver. "Are you sure my godfather isn't there, sir?"

Jay looked at Vince, then said into the phone, "Tim, you say your godfather is a desk?"

"Yup," replied the young voice. "Pine. He went for his usual walk. Sometimes he heads over to the Stratosphere and I thought maybe he went there today, Jay."

"Okay," Jay said slowly to himself, "this Tim is looking for his godfather, who is a pine desk. He thought maybe the desk came over to the Stratosphere." He wondered how Tim knew his name.

"See how outrageous it all is?" Vince exclaimed.

"It is a little strange," Jay admitted. "But I'm sure it's just the typical kid's imagination."

"HE SOUNDS DEADLY SERIOUS!!" Vince yelled.

"It's almost dinnertime, and my godfather never wants to miss dinner," Tim added.

Jay wasn't sure what to do with this strange situation. Finally he said to Tim, "Are you in the house alone?" He thought maybe if Tim was alone, he'd call someone with a strange tale like this to keep him amused.

"No," Tim replied. "My mommy's here, and so are my godmother, godgrandmother, and godgrandfather." Suddenly he said enthusiastically, "Would you like to speak with my godgrandfather?"

"Sure," Jay replied.

"'Kay. Just a minute!" Tim hurried off.

Vince looked at Jay as if to say, "Well?"

"He said he was going to bring his godgrandfather to the phone," Jay explained.

Then Marty and Stanley peeked in. "What's happening in here?" Marty asked.

"NONSENSE!" Vince replied, and explained what was happening.

Pretty sure Tim came back to the phone. "Okay, here's my godgrandfather," he told Jay.

"Uh, hello, godgrandfather," Jay said hesitantly.

All he heard in response was bong, bong, bong.

He took the phone away from his ear and stared at it.

"What's wrong?" Stanley asked.

In response, Jay handed him the phone.

After five bongs, Stanley gave the phone to Marty, who then gave it to Vince.

"RIDICULOUS!!" Vince yelled after three bongs.

"What is that??!" Stanley demanded.

"Well, actually," Marty said, "it sounded like a grandfather clock."

Jay took the phone again, and said to Tim, "Uh . . . can I speak with your mother?"

"'Kay," Tim replied, then asked, "Did you have a nice chat with my godgrandfather?"

"Uh, yeah," was all Jay said.

Within the minute, a woman's voice said, "Hello?"

Jay was relieved that a person had answered instead of a pole lamp or a stereo. "Uh, hello," he said. "Are you Tim's mother?"

"Oh, yes," the woman replied. She sounded slightly edgy. "I hope his godfather Frank will get home soon. Dinner is in fifteen minutes!"

Jay turned to the others and told them what Tim's mom had said. "Something very strange is going on here," he said.

"THAT GOES WITHOUT SAYING!" Vince yelled.

"Well, let's not go to pieces," Stanley advised. "Let's calmly try to figure out what's happening here."

Before he or anyone else could say anything more, Dan Allen called from down the hall. "Hey! Where'd this pine desk come from??"

Everyone looked at each other in speechless shock.

Then, from the cordless phone Jay was still holding, Tim's voice said, "Is my godfather there? It's almost dinnertime!"

The pine desk suddenly perked up, seemed to listen to what Tim was saying, then headed for the door.

Jay was too shocked at this sight to say anything.

Finally Stanley said, "Let's follow that desk! There's something very strange about all this, and it might not even be on the up and up!"

The other deejays quickly agreed to this and followed the desk out the door.

"Hey! Wait a minute!" Dan called after them. "What's going on here??"

Jay came back and gave the phone to Dan. "Here. Tell Tim we think we've found his godfather and that he's probably on his way home."

Dan took the phone and looked down at it, totally baffled.

"The desk lives in this area?" Marty said in surprise.

"Apparently," Jay replied.

"I hope we're not walking into some kind of trap," Stanley muttered.

Before long, the desk stopped in front of a large white house with a wraparound porch and a tower. The desk then walked up the stairs and rang the doorbell.

"This is really weird," Jay declared, as they walked up on the porch with the desk.

The door was opened by a pretty woman in her thirties. "Oh! Frank! You're back just in time for dinner!" she said to the desk, opening the screen door and admitting the desk. Jay recognized the voice as the one belonging to Tim's mother.

Only after the desk was inside did the woman notice the deejays. "Oh, hello," she said. "Can I help you with something?"

Before they could answer, a young red-haired boy of about six rushed out on the porch. "Hi!" he greeted the deejays.

"Hi," they all replied. Then Jay asked, "Are you Tim?"

The boy nodded. "Yup. I'm so glad my godfather got back!" He turned to his mother. "This is Marty, Jay, and Stanley from Live from Las Vegas," he said enthusiastically. "Godfather must've visited the Stratosphere today!"

Tim's mother looked at Marty, Jay, and Stanley with new interest. "You're the disc jockeys on Live from Las Vegas?" she asked.

"Yeah," Stanley answered for all of them.

"Tim just adores Live from Las Vegas," the woman told them. "He listens every night."

"Yup!" Tim grinned at the deejays. "I'm so excited to finally get to meet you all in person!

"I've got the Live from Las Vegas logo pasted on our car!" Tim stated proudly. "And I'm the vice president of the National Live from Las Vegas Fan Club!"

"Well, we're honored to meet such a dedicated fan," Marty said.

Tim turned to his mother. "Can they stay for dinner, Mom? Please?"

Tim's mother smiled. "Of course. We'd be honored if you would."

The deejays looked at each other. Then Jay said to Tim and his mother, "Thanks for asking us. We accept."

"Yeah!" Tim shrieked in delight.

Jay nodded. "Apparently."

"That's crazy!" Dan protested.

"Yeah, it is," Stanley agreed.

"Maybe there is something to that Oriental ‘inner life' philosophy after all," Marty said.

Just then Vince started shrieking. "MICHAELS!!! THOMPSON!!! KNOX!!! GET IN HERE!! THAT KID'S CALLING AGAIN!!"

In what seemed like two seconds, the engineer appeared in the broadcast booth, holding the cordless phone and looking furious.

"Has Tim's godfather gone out for another walk?" Jay asked.

"Or is the godgrandfather calling again?" Marty added.

"NO!!" Vince yelled. "THIS TIME HIS GODMOTHER HAS GONE TO AN ANTIQUE SHOW!!"

Jay took the phone. "Hello?"

"Hi!" Tim said. "Have you seen my godmother? She went to an antique show at the Stratosphere."

"No, I haven't seen her," Jay replied. "What does she look like?"

"She's a pole lamp," Tim said.

Then Frankie the engineer came in. "Hey, you know that antique show on the Stratosphere's first floor?"

"Yeah," all four deejays said in unison.

"Well, I just saw a pole lamp down there," Frankie announced. "I must need glasses or something, because it looked like the lamp was walking around by itself!!"

The deejays looked at each other.

"I think we've found your godmother, Tim," Jay said into the phone.

"Oh brother," Dan and Stanley sighed.

"Here we go again," Marty stated.