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Shatika's HuGStory

Well, basically my story is much like all of yours. My GYN told me at 21 years old that I would have trouble getting pregnant and that I would need fertility meds, so of course I was upset about that. When I found myself pregnant less than 2 months after being married, I was ecstatic! We danced around our apartment and did approximately 4 more home pregnancy tests after the first one. We were so giddy , we could not even read the Sunday comics ( a weekly ritual), instead we turned to the baby sections of the sale papers. Well, our joy was short lived when I began to get sick. Soon I was throwing up all day, every day. My doctors only advice at the time was, " don't throw up when you get home." When he tested me finally and found out htat I was spilling ketones and losing weight, he admitted me to the hospital ( the first of many such admittances).

Still there was no relief from the constant debilitating nausea and vomiting. I eventually ended up having a midline catheter placed in my arm and was fed by TPN. My family did not believe me, my friends distanced themselves, so it was just David and me to get through this. Then I felt her move and all was right with the world. the nausea was still there and I still threw up, but I got to feel my precious baby move.

Unfortunately I lost her at 24 weeks. I went into pre term labor and stayed in the hospital for 5 days, bu they did nothing to help her live. I was crushed. The pain so much that I felt I would not live through it. My only thought was to get pregnant again, and that would ease the pain. Well, we would not get pregnant again for 4 years, during which time we adopted a beautiful baby girl. When I did get pregnant again, I lost that baby at 9 weeks and never felt any nausea at all, but we found out that the baby stopped growing at about 6 weeks, just when my HG begins. Finally I was pregnant again, but then it started again. I thought that this time soemthing would be done. But everything was the same, my doctor ( different this time) tried but I think that he didn't know much about HG and how to treat it. My family thought it was psychological, except for my sister who really tried to help me, but she was at a loss as well. I was constantly hospitalized, could not take care of my 3 year old daughter, was made to feel guilty about it and this time had a central line placed in my neck for TPN ( the midline catheter blew in my arm, so they couldn't use that anymore). With everything falling down around me, I decided to terminate this much wanted ( and expenseive, since I had to use fertility drugs) pregnancy. I thought that this was the only way to make all the pain and suffering go away. After it was done, I realized that I had made the biggest mistake of my life, one I regret to this day. But I had no options. There was no way I could have gone on for 7 more months like that.

This time, though, we are armed with lots of info about HG and sosme treatment options that we will demand. Termination is not only no longer an option, but the word is almost banned from my house! I know that I have to have all of my support in place the moment we find out we are pregnant again, and this time it will be OK. Plus as a present to myself, I'll be getting my tubes tied right after I "give-birth-to-a-full-term-healthy-baby."

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