Just then a white Camero pulled up to Nick’s house.
“ What’s she doing here?” Nick thought as he saw his ex-girlfriend walk up to his door.
The day that I realized that I really, really liked Nick I went over to his house. I drove up to Nick’s driveway just in time to see a tall blond girl leave Nick’s house.
“ I wonder who that is?” I thought as I got out of the car.
Nick looked a little uncomfortable when he saw that we were both there.
“ Oh, man! I hope that Nina doesn’t find out because I really want to tell her how I feel. I don’t want Amanda to ruin it,” Nick thought worriedly.
The girl came up to me and cheerfully said,” Hi, I’m Nick’s girlfriend, Amanda. Who are you?”
“ Oh no,” Nick whispered to himself, but there wasn’t anything he could do to stop her.
I stared at her not knowing what to think. How could Nick not mention that he had a girlfriend? A look of hurt passed through my eyes, but I quickly changed it so that she wouldn’t see it, “ Hi,” I said just as joyful, so that she would not hear the disappointment in my voice. “ I’m Evelina, a friend of Nick’s, nice to meet you.”
“ Well it is nice to meet you, too. I have to go now, but maybe we can get together sometime. What do you think Nicky?” she turned around and asked him.
He had quietly been watching the scene from his porch, and I saw him cringe at the sound of the nickname that he hated. I looked to him for an answer and he weakly answered, “Sure.”
I turned and smiled at Amanda, a fake smile of course, because inside my heart was breaking into a million pieces. She turned to leave, and she blew a kiss towards Nick. I flinched at the sight of that, and I think that he cringed, too. But it could have been my head trying to cover the fact that Nick already had a girlfriend, and that I didn’t have a chance in hell to compete with this girl. We were complete opposites, and in my eyes that was enough to disqualify me from the race for Nick’s affection. Once she had left I turned to face Nick. I didn’t know what to say or how to react; I just stared at him in disbelief.
“ So that was your girlfriend?” I asked as he leaned forward a bit to hear me because I said it so softly.
“ Well, yeah in a way,” he answered back just as softly.
I thought I sensed a feeling of regret, and I tried to look in his eyes so that I could see for sure what it was he was feeling. But I couldn’t really get a good look because he had his head bent like he was ashamed.
“ Nick is something wrong?” I asked.
“ I really need to talk to you. Do you want to come inside?” Nick asked hopefully.
I didn’t really want to go inside because I was afraid that I would break down and cry right in front of him. I just wanted to go to my room and cry for hours. My head kept of telling me that I let myself get hurt again, and that I was stupid for letting myself fall for someone again, and I should just go home. But my heart wanted to hear his explanation because of that small chance that it was actually a decent one. I silently walked inside letting my heart lead the way.
“ How am I going to tell Evelina that I am going out with Amanda out of pity, and all I really want to do is be with her?” Nick asked himself as he followed me to the living room.
He looked me in the eye and saw how hurt I was. I tried my best to hide it, but Nick knew me too well, and I knew that he knew that I was hurt (Does that make sense?)
Nick sat down across from me and took a deep breath. “ Evelina I know that this whole girlfriend thing comes as a surprise to you, and I’m sorry I never told you about her before. But she was never really important to me...”
“ It’s okay. You don’t have to explain,” I interrupted.
“ But I want to,” Nick said with pleading eyes. “ I went out with Amanda for about six months, but I was never really comfortable around her. She seemed to be so caught up in my fame, and she seemed to like me for that and not for me. I knew I had to stop going out with her, but I was stuck for awhile because I didn’t know what to do. I mean I knew what I had to do, but I didn’t want to hurt her, so I kind of just stayed with her out of pity,” Nick suddenly stopped and looked at me.
I was looking down at my hands, which he was holding, and I looked up at him to ask him why he had stopped talking.
He didn’t make an attempt at finishing so I asked him, ” So why did you finally break up with her?” I was surprised at how strong my voice sounded compared to how weak I felt inside.
“ I finally realized that I couldn’t be happy with her, and that I needed to put my feelings before hers for once in our relationship,” Nick explained calmly.
“ So then why did you go back with her?” I asked softly.
“ I don’t know I guess I just felt like I needed to do this as a favor to her. She came back the night you got to college, and I talked to her for a few minutes. She begged me to go back with her. I told her that I just couldn’t. I don’t know if you noticed, but that was the reason I was so distant.”
I nodded my head as I remembered that night, “ Is that why you got off the phone so quickly the next day?”
He looked up at me surprised that I remembered. “ Yeah, she had barely gotten there when I was talking to you. She came back this morning, and started begging me and crying again. You know me; I’m a real softie, so I gave in before I realized what I had done. Then I saw how happy it made her, so I couldn’t tell her no,” Nick tried to explain to me.
“ But that means your putting her feelings in front of yours again, and wasn’t that the reason you broke up with her?” I asked trying to get him to see that he was making the same mistake all over again.
He quietly sat back to think about what I had said. I wasn’t telling him these things so that he would break up with her, and leave the path clear for me, but because I wanted him to be happy. I looked at him trying to figure out what to do, and I could honestly say that I would have let Amanda have him if I knew that he would be happy with her. But I knew that he wouldn’t be, so I couldn’t keep my mouth shut.
“ I’ll leave you here so that you can think about it,” I told him as I got up to leave.
He nodded and I left him sitting on the couch trying to decide if he wanted to be happy for once in his life or make someone else happy but be miserable himself.
“ How do I get myself in these messes? All I really want is to be happy, and I can’t be happy with Amanda because I just don’t love her. The only person I can be happy with is Evelina,” Nick thought to himself. “ So then why can’t I just tell Amanda that I can’t be with her, and tell Evelina that I love her,” Nick suddenly sat up. “ I can’t believe I just admitted that. Do I really love her?” Nick thought back to all the conversations we had and all the times we had spent together and I smile slowly appeared on his lips, “ Yes I definitely love her.”
As soon as I left Nick’s house I drove to my dorm, and ran up to my room. I buried my face into my pillow and cried until I thought I had run out of tears. By the time I had finished crying I had the biggest headache, and all I could think about was how much I wanted to be with Nick. My heart kept on insisting that I still had a chance to be with Nick, but my head finally spoke up and I listened. I couldn’t risk being hurt again; it was just too much for me to handle. I promised myself then and there that I wouldn’t let myself fall for Nick any more, and that I would try my hardest to forget about him.
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