Alex injects his head with helium in an attempt to fly!

In a recent story sent to me by someone close to Alex, who, for obvious reasons wishes to remain anonomous, it is revealed that Dorkshire's most grotesque Dictator uses a bizarre method of transportation to travel from place to place, and even lift him out of bed!

Apparently inspired by a childhood ride in a hot air balloon, it has been revealed that Alex has taken to injecting his head with helium, forcing his rubberised skull to expand, and lift him from the ground.



The above photograph, taken from the very pages of the Dorkshire web site, shows Alex, apparently attempting to lift himself out of a tank with the aid a horrifically oversized head. Many believe that this is further proof of Alex's descent into insanity, as he abandons conventional methods of transport for the more bizzarre...
Who knows what will come next - a wheeled sledge pulled by teams of babies, perhaps, or rolling down hills in a tube made from butterscotch?

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