I think that all prophets have to go through a time of rejection
after accepting their personal calling as a prophet. I don't know
if this period is a part of a prophet's ministry, per se, (Jesus'
ministry began at age 30) but I believe it _is_ part of our training.
Our Lord is much acquainted with grief, and until we can enter into
that with Him, we don't know that part of His heart. So, although
I've had some difficult years, some heart fruit, at least, is now
coming out of that.
Vision: Hang Gliding.
This is my first post to this list. This is actually new territory
for me. Not the idea of prophecy or hearing from God, but for me
it's been difficult to accept the calling God has for me. Mostly,
I struggle with sin and I never believed that God would want to use
someone was wretched as myself.
I am sharing this partially in obedience to "not hiding my light
under a bushel" and partially in the hope that others may find it
helpful.
During March of 1997 I was crying out to God, asking Him
what His calling on my life was all about.
God answered me with a vision, one that took three days
to completely unfold. This is the most intense vision
I've ever received. I was not just watching it on a
"movie screen", I was participating in it as though it
were actually happening. Even now, a year later, the
memory has not faded - it's as though I am remembering
something that actually happened. I could see, hear,
touch, smell, and taste my surroundings -- I even
developed vertigo.
This is that vision:
I am standing on the edge of a very high cliff. It's
the dark of the night, and I can see thousands or even
millions of lights spread out below me. Some of the
lights are small, and some are large and spread out
across a wide area. Some are bright, while others are
so dim I can barely see them. The large lights were not
necessarily the brightest -- in fact, some of the
smallest were also among the brightest. Overall I could
see no correlation between the size of a light and how
bright it was.
I knew immediately that the lights were churches in all
their denominations, sects, and varieties, and that I
was seeing churches all over the world. Some of the
lights were connected with others, like a string of
towns along a freeway in a nighttime satellite picture,
while others were isolated. Some were so close together
that I had to shield the brighter ones in order to see
the dimmer. My overall impression was of a vast
uncomprehendingly complex network.
I spent a long time -- most of the night in the vision
-- just looking at the lights and marveling at their
striking, almost unearthly beauty. As I looked at this
beautiful network of lights, I realized that something
was going to happen soon, and that after this event the
world below would be plunged into a darkness such as it
had never known.
As the sky started to brighten with the dawn, I noticed
some things nearby.
First, I realized that I was strapped into a hang
glider. I knew I was in that hang glider to take part
in some sort of battle -- a rescue operation for the
lights (churches and people) below.
Next I noticed that there were people on either side of
me, also strapped into hang gliders. As I looked in the
ever increasing light, I realized that the entire cliff
section was lined with people who were ready -- even
anxious -- to jump off the cliff and begin the rescue.
There were many thousands of warriors on this cliff
edge, all straining forward, anxious to fight that final
battle. As I gazed farther and farther out to my sides,
I saw more cliff sections like the one I was on. Each
cliff was lined with people ready to go, just like the
cliff I was on. I knew that we were all waiting to
swoop down to those lights below to carry them back up
to this cliff and to safety.
I saw many Great Men of God there. Some were young,
some old, some had years of battle experience, while
others just seemed to have an anointing which prepared
them for the battle to follow. I felt humbled to be in
such company. My initial surge of excitement over the
glory of the coming battle dissipated as I realized how
many of these veterans were so much more qualified than
I. I began to wonder if God had made a mistake placing
me among such pillars of the kingdom.
After a while, I noticed that the hang glider of the
person on my right was not assembled quite correctly.
One of the tensioning wires that held it together was
dangerously loose. It would probably hold in normal,
sedate cruising, but I knew that in the stress and
strain of battle he was going to loose a wing. He was
going to fall to his death, or at the very least he was
going to be neutralized from the battle, right when he
would be needed the most.
The person on my left was a grizzled old veteran, with
the battle scars to prove it. Both his own body and his
craft showed signs of former damage, but both were
repaired and healthy. One wing spar was a different
color because it had been replaced, there were many
patches on the fabric, and the handlebar covering was
worn through to the bare metal in places. But the
overall craft was sound and ready for battle.
As I looked around, I saw other details about many of
the hang gliders. Some were assembled incorrectly , or
had something broken, or were not strapped on quite
right. A few were even being worn backward. But no one
seemed to notice. I grieved when I realized how many of
these warriors would be neutralized in the battle, and
that some would even fall to their deaths and be lost
entirely.
I was puzzled by this, so I asked the Lord, "What's
going on Lord? Why are so many of these people so ill
prepared? Why do they care so much about the future
glory of the battle, and so little about themselves and
their neighbors?"
In reply He simply said, "Turn around." I unstrapped my
glider, turned, and looked.
What I saw next broke my heart.
Immediately behind me was another row of people in hang
gliders. Behind these there were even more, and behind
those, more. Row upon row of warriors, all waiting for
the opportunity to move up to the cliff's edge for that
final glorious jump.
But these warriors' crafts were even less prepared than
the ones in the front row. The farther back I looked,
the more I saw hazards among the hang gliders. Some had
perfectly assembled and balanced frames, but no fabric
on their wings. Others had only half a frame, with the
extra fabric flapping uselessly in the wind. A few had
no frame at all, they simply had their fabric wrapped
around their bodies. There were many, many variations
on this, some obvious, like the missing frame, and some
more subtle, like the loose tensioning wire on my
immediate right.
A couple warriors even had no evidence of a hang glider
at all. Those ones were the most arrogant and boastful,
utterly confidant that their abilities and inherent
"goodness" would bring them great glory in the coming
battle.
Most, however, truly meant well but were simply unaware
that their craft was not ready.
Many of the warriors were prepared, or at least their
hang gliders were. But the number of those who were not
astounded and shocked me. Even more shocking to me was
the utter lack of concern each man demonstrated for his
neighbor. Each ill prepared craft had the potential to
neutralize two warriors in this vast army: the wearer of
that glider, and the one who was going to have to
abandon the harvest below to rescue him or her.
As I looked even farther back, I saw the rear edge of
those who were in place for the battle. There was a lot
of turbulence there as the people in the last few rows
were settling in.
Back further yet, almost at the limits of my vision, I
saw the most heartbreaking sight of all. I saw millions
of people running and leaping forward, all anxious to
get in line for the final battle. They were running
across a vast plain, but in places their progress was
impeded by large hills and even a few small mountains.
Most just ran around the hills and mountains. A few
climbed over, and just a few -- a very precious few --
stopped long enough to investigate the mountains
themselves. Of those few who stopped and looked, most
soon gave up and rejoined the crowd rushing headlong to
the final battle.
Of all the hills and mountains out on the plain, a
couple had been exposed for what actually they were.
They were not really hills at all, but vast piles of
unassembled hang gliders covered by immense tarps. The
majority of the people were ignoring the very things
they needed to survive the coming harvest, much less
have an effective role in it.
When I realized this, I fell down sobbing in grief. For
someone who has rejected God to fall to their death is
one thing, but for the vast numbers of newly converted
who were going to lose their lives -- that crushed the
breath right out of me.
As I lay there crying in grief and gasping for air, I
cried out in my heart to God "Why have you given me this
terrible, terrible burden? Isn't it enough that you've
had me so many years in the desert? What can I possibly
do?"
He answered with words from Ezekiel 38:
"Son of man, speak to your countrymen and say to
them: `When I bring the sword against a land, and
the people of the land choose one of their men and
make him their watchman, and he sees the sword
coming against the land and blows the trumpet to
warn the people, then if anyone hears the trumpet
but does not take warning and the sword comes and
takes his life, his blood will be on his own head.
Since he heard the sound of the trumpet but did
not take warning, his blood will be on his own
head. If he had taken warning, he would have
saved himself. But if the watchman sees the sword
coming and does not blow the trumpet to warn the
people and the sword comes and takes the life of
one of them, that man will be taken away because
of his sin, but I will hold the watchman
accountable for his blood.'
"Son of man, I have made you a watchman for the
house of Israel; so hear the word I speak and give
them warning from me. When I say to the wicked,
`O wicked man, you will surely die,' and you do
not speak out to dissuade him from his ways, that
wicked man will die for his sin, and I will hold
you accountable for his blood. But if you do warn
the wicked man to turn from his ways and he does
not do so, he will die for his sin, but you will
have saved yourself.
With that promise, the constriction in my chest eased,
my sobs slowly ebbed, and once again I could see some
hope.
I started telling the others there on the cliff's edge,
making them aware of the state of their crafts. Even
more importantly -- far far more importantly -- I
started encouraging them to check their neighbors.
Eventually I was exhorting all of them to pass along
this Spirit of holiness, of critically examining oneself
and one's craft in the Light of truth and love.
I watched as this spread out like a wave. As each
pastor came to understand the need for checking to make
sure their craft was O.K. -- and why -- they passed it
along to their neighbors. As I watched I saw similar
splashes in the vast army, where other watchmen had
sounded the same cry.
The final thing I and the other watchmen did was direct
the attention of the leaders to the hundred of thousands
of leaders behind them and to the millions of new
believers still running up to the battle formation. We
started exhorting the pastors to prepare their leaders
and this horde for what was ahead.
Interpretation
For me personally, this vision is has brought a lot of
clarity and definition about my role in God's Kingdom.
Dad has spent many years teaching me who I am in
relation to Him, that I am His son, and that he takes
immense pleasure in me for that reason alone and not
because I "perform" to His satisfaction. I know the
fact the Dad says I am a watchman does not mean He loves
me more or less than anyone else. In fact, although I
can see indications of this calling as far back in my
life as early childhood, it was not until I got my basic
identity as Dad's son and the Son's bride settled that I
could actually be of any use to Him in this role.
I've always had a heart for unity, particularly between
churches that are geographically close but infinitely
separated by the wily ploys of the devourer...
If nothing else, this vision helps me realize that when
God tells me something and asks me to pass it on, there
might actually be a possibility that maybe He really
does want me to be obedient in following through. (I
think the bible refers to this as having a "mustard
seed's" amount of faith.)
Almost as important for me in this vision is what I
didn't see. In the vision I didn't notice or
particularly care about the individual weapons and tools
which each warrior had. I was not concerned about their
skills at using them. Although I could clearly see the
personality and heart of each person when I looked at
them, the reason for that was not that I should somehow
"fix" who they are or teach them how to fight the
fight. Rather, by seeing each person's heart, I could
more effectively communicate with them about the need
for tending to their craft and helping others do the
same.
For me, knowing this sets some boundaries that I know I
can only cross with the most extreme unction from the
Spirit. All my life I've struggled with the fact that I
"see" a person's inner heart as easily as I see their
outer characteristics, their physical body and their
personality. I was always a social outcast as a child,
because I had no clue how to respond socially. I never
understood that others didn't see people as I did. As
an adult I've had to learn how to respond to the social
cues that others seem to be able to handle naturally.
In the process of working this out, I've learned that I
can easily, almost naturally, manipulate people. I've
also learned that this is witchcraft, and is something I
need to run from.
Working out my prophetical calling has been as much
about learning where _not_ to go and what _not_ to do
as it has about learning what _to_ do.
As I've prayed about this vision, I've asked God if this
is just a personal word meant to encourage only me, or
if there is something in this for the greater body of
Christ. What follows is my best attempt to date figuring out
discern what, if anything, He may want to say to others
than myself through this vision.
First, to the prophets, the other watchmen (and women)
God is calling to sound this cry:
I believe that the measure of a prophet is not in how
loudly or boldly he or she proclaims the truth, nor is
it in how popular they manage to become. Rather, our
measure is in how effective we are at introducing
change.
Actually, our true measure is in our character and our
heart, and in our obedience to God. But change is
something a bit more tangible which can only flow from
our hearts as regulated by our character. Having a Godly
heart and a Godly character are inner fruit, while the
"change" I am speaking of is the external fruit of a
prophetical ministry.
So, if you as a prophet don't see a lot of positive
fruit on the outside, take look at your fruit on the
inside. External positive fruit is not popularity.
Rather it's the Father's purposes being accomplished.
In this vision, if I'd gone around ranting and raving at
those pastors and cursing and condemning them to hell
because of the imperfections, far fewer would have
bothered to take note, except perhaps to encourage me
most strongly to move on to "wherever God may be calling
me." I know this from very painful personal experience.
On the other hand, if I had been so fearful of loosing
my popularity, I would never have been able to approach
many of those pastors in boldness to speak the truth
with love. Again, been there, done that.
Believe it or not, prophets, many pastors _do_ actually
hear God on occasion, and most pastors really _are_ at
least a little sensitive in their spirits. If you
approach them with arrogance in your hearts, most
pastors will discern that. Or if you cower before them
with fear in your hearts, most of them will also see
that too. In either case many of those pastors will not
be able to receive what you have to say because the
"static" so overpowers the "radio station".
Above all, remember that prophetical ministry is
absolutely _not_ about glorifying the prophet, but
absolutely _is_ about glorifying the bride.
Pastors and other leaders:
Please try to remember that prophets are people too. I
have found many times that pastors are afraid of those
with prophetical anointing. It seems like most people
tend to either fear and despise prophets, or they tend
to worship them. I don't think that any pastor in their
right mind would want to release either of those
dynamics into their flocks.
But know that in the majority of cases these prophets
are completely on their own. Most pastors have a lesser
or greater amount of schooling -- they almost certainly
have some specific training to learn how to be a
pastor. Almost all churches and denominations have
avenues for raising up and guiding young pastors, and
for keeping at bay the wolves in sheep's clothing. And
every pastor I have ever known has _some_ sort of
support mechanism in place once they are actually out
pastoring in the real word.
In today's greater Christian community, how many of
God's prophets have the same preparation? How many are
trained? How many are recognized by their church's
leadership and guided towards maturity?
Many whom God has called as prophets are a little (or
even a lot) rough around the edges. Please try to
understand what we go through as we try to be obedient
to God's call on our lives. I have, at various times,
thought I was: worthless; the next John the Baptist;
certifiably crazy; the only sane person left; ready to
be used by God when I wasn't; not ready when in fact I
was; and just about everything in between. But rarely
have I been provided guidelines and encouragement from
my _church_ leadership. Most of the other people I've
known who have prophetical anointing have had similar
experiences.
If you have someone in your flock who seems to exhibit
this kind of anointing, please don't be afraid of them.
Whatever they may be like on the outside, every person I
have ever met with even an ounce of prophetical
anointing has started out with a very sensitive heart on
the inside. Some prophets have developed hard hearts,
but in my experience most of the time this is a reaction
to being simultaneously worshiped and feared by other
people.
If someone is coming to you claiming to have a
prophetical word from God, please try to look past their
pride and insecurity, and at the same time don't be
upset or overawed by the idea that God my choose to
speak something through them some of the time. Just
take what they say and apply the discernment God has
given you to the content.
Above all, please, please try to work with them, setting
boundaries and guiding them as necessary, but also
encouraging them to become who God is calling them to be.
Many prophets would give their right leg simply to be
accepted as people who happen to have a particular
gifting or anointing. (Of course, a lot of the pastors
I've known would probably say the same thing about
themselves.)
To the new believers:
Hang on!
This is going to be the ride of your life. In fact,
it's going to be the ride of everybody's life. None of
us have _ever_ done this before, at least not on this
scale. While many leaders are experienced at hang
gliding (to use the metaphor from the vision), never
before has there been an operation in God's kingdom on
this massive a scale.
To everyone:
This interpretation -- all of it, but especially that
which is directed to others than myself -- is composed
primarily of my thoughts as I've tried to come to grips
with this vision. As such, to me the interpretation
carries less weight than the vision itself. I've
certainly sought the Lord's Heart in interpreting this,
but in the end I must confess that any interpretation has
been primarily my efforts at comprehension and
understanding.
Application
Absolutely the last way I want to apply this vision is
by rushing out on my own in an attempt to make it happen
by "helping" God along.
At the present time God has been very clearly and
strongly telling me to "Stop hiding my light under a
bushel." That's one of the reasons I'm sending this to
the list.
This vision is not an isolated event in my life; it
confirms many things that have happened before and
since. For years I've had an intense passion to see the
Son's bride made ready for her Bridegroom. While this
vision has provided me a few more clues about what that
might look like, none of the essential elements or
underlying passions are new.
For me personally, I'm waiting, and watching in wonder
and awe as this is starting to unfold.
Timing
Since God almost _always_ seems to miss it on this one,
I will spare him the embarrassment of making yet another
mistake.
*grin*
Except for instances when God has _clearly_ told me a
specific time or date as part of a word or vision, I've
learned to be cautions about trying to attach a sense of
timing to what I learn in the Spirit, other than reporting a
sense of urgency if that is there.
My sense for this vision is that it is first and
foremost meant for the prophets, and I see it as a call
to allow God to make us effective instruments. ones that
He can use to bring about the change _He_ wants, _when_
He want's it. That's the other reason I'm posting it.
I also see here things which are coming (the second wave
of the harvest) and things which may be happening now
(the first wave)...
-Michael D. O'Quinn.
