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Do I Really Have To Obey Him?

Isn't That Just A Little Bit Old-Fashioned?

Bible verses that clearly teach we are to obey our husbands:

(Eph 5:24 KJV) Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

That's pretty plain, isn't it? The church is supposed to obey God by DOING WHAT HE SAID, so are the wives to OBEY WHAT OUR HUSBANDS SAY "in everything."

(Titus 2:3-5 KJV) The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

The older women are to be an example & teach the younger women to be obedient to their husbands.

(1 Pet 3:5-6 KJV) For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord:

If you want God to consider you a holy woman, obey your husband.

I think one of the most widely misunderstood concepts of marriage today is that of submission. Today, women seem to think that they should have as much as or more authority in the marriage than their husband. Moreover they think those wives who submit to their husbands ought to be more "enlightened." Actually, itís the other way around. The wife who bucks her husband on every decision he tries to make has no peace in the home.

The biblical precept of a wife submitting to her husband is such a beautiful concept when applied properly. Have you ever stopped to consider the "modern" woman? How many of them truly look happy to you? The one's I've seen that come to mind look bitter & hardened by the world; not at all feminine or happy. The women I've seen that are obedient to their husbands look to be the happier lot(you mean it's not just that God wants the women trodden down by man?) God actually wants you to be happy & He knows you won't be happy until you live your life the way God designed you to live.

Women nowadays seem to think submission to her husband means they are the silent slave who has no say in the marriage whatsoever; whatever hubby says, do it; just like a robot. Actually, a wife's submission is when two people who are "one" with the same goal, going the same direction on the same pathway; it's the wife saying, "I chose this man to be my husband, to follow his lead because we're going the same way."

(Gen 2:24 KJV) Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

(Amos 3:3 KJV) Can two walk together, except they be agreed?

We should chose our life's partner because we have something in common, we're going in the same direction; there was an attraction there that said, "I want to be with this man for the rest of my life." We aren't enemies to our husbands (or we shouldn't be), God designed us to complement & complete our husbands.

We have a family to raise & my little girls need a godly lady to immitate, just as my sons need a godly man for an example. If I'm contenteous toward my husband & what he tells me to do, my little girls will only see marriage as a burden; then they won't fulfill God's design for their life. We can confuse them by how we behave & live.

Here is the classic question, "Well, what if my husband tells me to do something that's a sin?" Now if this is actually a valid question for you I will talk on this subject in a short time. But for most of us, how many can actually say that is a valid question for ME? Most husbands aren't trying to get you into sin; they're trying to keep you out of sin. Does this sound familiar: "Quit watching those soap operas and get this house clean!!" Or how about: "Get off the internet & fix some supper!!" (OUCH!!) Now let's be honest, most husbands are not saying, "Let's go out to a bar, dance all night, get drunk & try to find someone new." Wives, OBEY your husbands!! Don't try to find cheap excuses as to why you are the ONE exception to the rule.

If this truly is a concern for you, then you should strive to be the best wife to your husband in the areas you can. Make sure if you have to tell him no, that it's for a clearly biblical reason. He will be able to tell if you're using "that Bible stuff" as an excuse or as a proper reason. Be sure of YOUR motives. Be ABLE to show him why you can't obey him; even if you know he won't ask. This is mostly for your sake; YOU need to know for sure it's biblical, not just that you think it is, or your best friend says it is; you are accountable to God if you disobey him & it turns out to be something that wasn't biblical. If you have to disobey him over a Bible principle, don't be contentious; he will see that as the reason you told him no, instead of the Bible.

Do not disobey your husband over money issues!! Your husband is the leader of your house, period. The money should be spent how he says. "But what if there is a real need in the house & he says no & spends it selfishly?" Let HIM learn the lesson of being foolish with his money; instead of YOU learning the lesson of disobeying authority. You will be blessed for your obedience. You can appeal to him, don't nag or beg.

Why did God say the man was to be the one to have the final say?

(Gen 3:16 KJV) Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

As unappealing as it sounds, the woman (Eve) was the one who was deceived. Women are emotional creatures. That's how God made us. We are deceived easier than men because of that; therefore God knew we needed a man to balance us.

I guess you could blame it on Eve, but be careful before you do; each of us would have done the same thing if we had been Eve. It was in God's design.

Here's one to make you think: Your husband was not complete until you married him!! God went to alot of trouble to show that to Adam & to us through his example. Man was not made to be alone; God knew he needed someone to complete man. Just as you need your husband to balance & complete you, your husband needs you to complete him.

(Gen 2:18-24 KJV) And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

What do we get for being obedient to out husbands? Well, for one, peace in the home. Two, the children have a living example of how they should treat you & other authority figures & eventually their spouse. Three, you get a more fulfilling life because you're doing what God said to do. May we all strive for sweet harmony in our homes because of our obedience to our own husbands.

Kim Camp