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Okay, quite a few of motorists are idiots.  The scary part is, most idiots don't know that
they indeed are idiots.  As a public service, I'm going to list a few things that 
separate idiot drivers from non idiot drivers.
  1. If you cruise in the left lane of a freeway and don't pass, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  2. If you have to make more than a 1 lane move to exit a freeway (far right lane to exit lane), YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  3. If you don't slow down in a school zone when children are present, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  4. If you do slow down in a school zone when children aren't present, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  5. If you use a lane that's about to end as a passing line, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  6. If you use a turning lane as a passing lane, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  7. If you don't turn from the far left or far right lane, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
    • Exception being if there are 2 or more turning lanes
  8. If you blare your horn within 1/4 second of a traffic light turning green, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  9. If you cut someone out in traffic, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT
  10. If you drive more than 10 miles an hour below the speed limit, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
    • Exception being if you're doing so in retaliation for someone breaking rule 8 or 13
    10b. If you drive slow, then speed up when someone tries to pass you, YOU ARE AN ASS HOLE and AN IDIOT (*)
    • Again, exception being if you're doing so in retaliation for someone breaking rules 8 or 13
  11. If you drive more than 10 miles an hour above the speed limit, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  12. If you intentionally hold up the car behind you by catching every light red, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT
    • Again, exception being if you're doing so in retaliation for someone breaking rule 8 or 13
  13. If you tailgate, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
    • Exception being if you're doing so in retaliation for someone breaking rule 9
  14. If you blow a 4 way stop sign, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  15. If you blow a 2 way stop sign, YOU ARE A HUGE IDIOT
  16. If you come out from a 2 way stop sign a split second before the car on the intersecting street clears the intersection, YOU ARE A GOD DAMN IDIOT
  17. If you pass a car stopped at a stop sign so you can blow the stop sign, YOU OUGHT TO BLOW YOURSELF. By the way, YOU ARE A GOD DAMN FUCKING IDIOT
  18. If you blow a red light, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  19. If you blow a red light against a very busy road, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT
  20. If you're in the left turn lane, the left turn arrow comes on, and you sit there and don't move, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
    • Possible exception if the IDIOT behind you is guilty of breaking rule 13, and you didn't break rule 9
  21. If you're in the left turn lane, the left turn arrow has cycled through, and you still cut in front of traffic to make your left turn, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  22. If you come out of a parking space without any regards for traffic in the road, YOU ARE AN IDIOT
  23. If you intentionally try to bash another car with yours, YOU ARE A SUICIDAL, MORONIC IDIOT (*)
  24. If you hit and run, the hit may be an accident. The run part, don't get me started on how much YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT
  25. If you see someone waiting for someone to pull out a parking space, and you decide to muscle in on them, and steal that parking space, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT, and YOU OUGHT TO HAVE YOUR HEAD BASHED IN
  26. If you activate your left turn signal to make a right turn, or your right turn signal to make a left turn, YOU ARE AN IDIOT!
  27. If you're an unauthorized driver (no license, no permit, or a permit with no licensed driver in the front seat with you), YOU ARE THE SUPREME IDIOT
  28. If you stop where there is no stop sign and you're not making a left-hand turn, YOU ARE A HUGE IDIOT (**)
  29. If you follow GPS directions, despite the fact that the stupid unit has you pull an illegal maneuver (wrong way on a one way street, left turn at a "no left turn" intersection, turn onto railroad tracks etc), your GPS may be a stupid unit, but, YOU ARE STILL AN IDIOT!
  30. If you stop in the middle of the road instead of pulling over to pick someone up, YOU ARE AN IDIOT! (***)
  31. If you stop in the middle of the road to unload your groceries, YOU ARE AN IDIOT!
  32. If you get out of your car at a traffic light to run in a store instead of using the parking lot, YOU ARE AN IDIOT!
  33. If you are a cop whose traffic stop forces eastbound traffic into the westbound lane, the fact that you're a cop doesn't change the fact that YOU ARE AN IDIOT!
  34. If you yell at a fellow motorist for following traffic laws, FUCK YOU, YOU ARE AN IDIOT. If I'm the motorist you yell at, I'VE TAKEN A PICTURE OF YOUR LICENSE PLATE, JACKASS!
  35. If you pass a school bus displaying blinking red lights, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT! More to come later! If you are an idiot, please do all us non idiots a favor, and give up your license. You are a menace to the motoring public who just wants to get from point A to point B. (*) Thanks to Anne Cooper for bringing the idiots with a (*) to my attention. (**) Thanks to retrogames.com message board for bringing idiots with a (**) to my attention. (***)Thanks to Katie for bringing the idiots with a (***) to my attention. Click here for other driving guides. Email other things that make an idiot driver Someone else's list of idiot drivers.
Are you an idiot?

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