Susannah couldn't do it. Before they had a chance to see her coming toward them, Susannah went into the doctors lounge. It was empty. She stood by the window. Susannah realized the view from this window was the same as the one from her office window. The one Todd had spent so much time staring out at. The tears that trickled down Susannah's face quickly gave way to the huge sobs that escaped her throat and shook her body. Susannah sank down to the floor under the window; her head met her knees, much like Timmy's little ball position. Susannah wept in a way she had never done before. For the first time, she was truly able to understand the grief a parent felt when they were about to lose a child.

*****

Susannah had never experienced the flood of emotions she was now feeling. She had seen other people experience grief so profound that it devastated them to the core of their souls. She had empathized and sympathized with them. Until now she could never have imagined what it truly felt like. Susannah realized she had crossed a line. Todd was no longer just a patient to her. She realized that what she was feeling was a parent's grief. She loved Todd as if he were her child. She could not accept that all the suffering Todd had been through his entire life, all the suffering that she had put him through in her efforts to help him would end like this. Perhaps, it was being able to acknowledge her feelings to herself or the inner strength that had always allowed Susannah to face any challenge that came her way, but suddenly she composed herself. She realized that she had responsibilities, not only to Todd, but also to Viki and Sam as well. Susannah washed her face and headed off to speak with them.

As she approached the waiting area outside the ICU Susannah could hear Viki shouting. "HOW DARE YOU ASK ME THAT! MY BROTHER IS ONLY TWENTY-EIGHT! HE HASN'T EVEN STARTED LIVING YET!" Sam was trying to quiet her down. Susannah rushed to them. "What's going on? Viki?" "This!" Viki answered and held a piece of paper up for Susannah to see.

Susannah saw that a resident had approached Viki about the DNR order. "They want me to sign a release for them not to resuscitate him if . . . if . . . Susannah! I will not let them give up on Todd. I will not allow them to let him die!" Viki cried out angrily. "All right Viki, shhhh, calm down. It's all right. No one is forcing you to sign anything." Susannah turned around to the young doctor. "Can you please leave us alone for now? I will speak with the family."

After the doctor walked away Susannah suggested, "Let's sit down." "Susannah, just get that away from me!" Viki ordered. Susannah put the form down on a table across the room and came back to where Viki sat. Sam looked at her helplessly and asked, "It's really bad isn't it?" Susannah nodded and said, "Todd is in extremely critical condition. He's in a coma."

Susannah chose not to mention anything about possible brain damage at this point. She didn't think either Viki or Sam could handle that right now. She also knew, that even with that knowledge Viki would still want everything humanly possible done for Todd. Susannah put her arm around Viki. She gently asked, "Viki, do you want to see Todd now? It would be all right." Viki looked at Susannah. The look in her eyes turned from one of fear to one of strength and she asked, "Should I call Tea and Blair and ask them if they want to see Todd?" "Yes, I think that would be a good idea," Susannah answered.

Sam and Viki stood beside Todd's bed. If possible, he looked even more fragile than he had before. His skin was almost translucent. He looked small and emaciated in the tangle of all the tubes that were attached to him. They could not believe he had gotten to this stage so quickly. There were no words left to say to him. Sam and Viki knew that somewhere in there Todd was struggling, as usual. They only hoped he was still able to try as hard as he could.

Tea had been in the middle of checking out some web sites that locate missing people when Viki called. She felt as if her heart had stopped when Viki told her about Todd's condition. She said she would be there as quickly as she could drive. Sam had called Blair. He could hear Blair start to cry over the phone when he told her that if she wanted to see Todd she should get to the hospital as soon as possible. Blair was on her way. Sam and Viki both knew that Todd would not want either Tea or Blair to see him this way. They also knew that to allow them the opportunity to see Todd, if they chose, was the only decent thing to do and prayed they that Todd would forgive them.

Blair was the first to arrive. Viki had been in contact with her all along, but had not gone into the specific details of Todd's therapy. Blair had no idea it had come to this. Now, Blair stood over the man she considered to be the great love of her life. Blair had seen Todd close to death before. She remembered the night she found him, nearly stabbed to death, by Powell. Even that could not prepare her for this.

Todd barely resembled the man she knew. He looked so pale and thin and helpless, as he lay perfectly still among the machines that were keeping him alive. She had spoken with Susannah for a few moments before she went in. "Do you think I should bring Starr to see him?" She asked. "No, I don't think it would be in Starr's best interest to see her father like that and I know Todd would not want Starr to see him this way," Susannah replied.

Even though the ventilator made it difficult Blair bent down and kissed Todd on the lips. "I'm here baby. Blair is here." Tears poured down Blair's face. She caressed Todd's cheek and spoke to him softly.

"Todd, all these years later and you are still trying to win the most pathetic contest. Okay, I give up. You are the all time champ. Oh, come on baby, don't do this. You have a little girl who's waiting for her daddy to come home to her. Todd, not a day goes by when Starr doesn't miss you or ask about you. I know what it's like to grow up without a daddy. Don't do that to Starr. As much as I hate to admit it, you are the best daddy any little girl could have. Don't make our daughter miss knowing that. You have to be there to keep all those boys away when she gets into high school. You have to be there for her."

Blair started to weep. "Oh Todd, and for me too. I never stopped loving you. Oh baby, don't you know that? I know I have acted like I don't care or sometimes like I hated you. You have to know I still love you. No one ever gets over what we had. I'm sorry I acted like I thought you killed Georgie. I never really believed that, not in my heart. Did that make you do what you did? Did you think no one would believe you if I didn't? You know I don't love Max. I have never loved anyone but you. I'm keeping the Sun going for you. Just like I did when you were in Ireland."

Blair paused to wipe away her tears and then continued. "I'm sorry for all the times I tried to keep Starr away from you. And for all the times I let Dorian influence the way I treated you. I was never on your side. I always took up for someone else against you. Todd Manning! Don't you dare die on me and leave me with all these feelings. Don't you dare leave your little girl to face this world without you. Todd, don't you dare!" Blair sobbed, unable to go on.

Blair kissed Todd one more time and left his room. She went over to Viki. They hugged each other without saying a word and Blair headed to the elevator. As the door opened, Tea got off the elevator. Blair looked at her and snidely remarked, "Well, you may finally be rid of Todd. At least you still have his money." Tea looked at Blair and slapped her across the face. Then, without saying a word, Tea just walked towards a stunned Sam and Viki. Blair hesitated for a moment. She looked as if she were about to say something. When the next elevator came she got on it and left.

"Tea, I'm sorry. Blair is very upset," Viki apologized for Blair. "I didn't come here to discuss Blair," Tea stated. "I want to see Todd."

Tea had made up her mind on the way over she was not going to allow herself to be cut out of Todd's life anymore. Not by her own feelings about seeing him this way and not by Todd himself. He was still her husband and no matter how difficult it became she was going to stand by him. She only prayed she'd be given the chance.

"Has there been any change since I spoke with you?" Tea asked Viki. "No, Todd is still in a coma and still in extremely critical condition." "Can I see him now?" Tea's fingernails cut into the palms of her hands as she waited for Viki's reply. Viki nodded.

As bad as Tea had imagined it, this was worse. She could not keep herself from trembling as she looked at Todd. The sounds of the machines only magnified the horror of the situation. She could not believe that the person lying among all those tubes and wires was Todd. She could not believe how frail he had become.

"Todd it's Te . . . it's Delgado. I'm here. I know you don't want me here but you're just going to have to tell me to leave yourself if you want me to go. Todd, can you feel this?" Tea gently lifted his swollen hand so his fingers could feel the ring she was wearing.

"It's my wedding ring. I never took it off you know. The whole world knows I'm still Mrs. Todd Manning. It's what I still want. It's what I've always wanted. I want to be your wife. I know I didn't always make it easy for you to trust me. I know I asked for more than you could give. I also know that you tried your best. Todd I know that now. I know you gave me all you could and that's all anyone can ask. Mi corazon, I've never known you to give up on anything. Getting custody of Starr is proof of that. Don't give up now. Sam and Viki love you so much. They think of you as their son. They've grown to love each other. Do you know that? And, do you know this?"

Tea bent down to him and whispered in his ear. "I love you. I've never stopped and I never will. No matter how long it takes; I'll be waiting for that life you promised me. Todd I won't leave you. Querido, I swear! No matter what you say or do, I won't ever leave you! Todd Please!" Tea took his hand.

"Ay dios mio!" Tea's eyes became wide with shock. She felt Todd squeeze her hand. Thinking it might just be her imagination she tried again. "Todd, if you can hear me squeeze my hand!" She felt him do it again. Tea called the nurse over to Todd's bed and then called Viki and Sam to come into the room. She once again asked Todd to squeeze her hand and he did.

Todd's temperature started to drop. The powerful diuretics, that previously had no effect, started to remove some of the fluid in his body. Gradually, over the next three days his kidneys started to function on their own. He still needed the help of a ventilator; however, he was starting to come out of the coma.

Viki, Sam, Tea, Susannah and Blair all took turns talking to him. They would hold his hand or stroke his hair, always letting him know that someone was there with him. When Viki and Sam were with him, talking to him, he would sometimes squeeze their hands, but had still not opened his eyes.

"Todd. Come on pal. I know you can hear me. You've been asleep long enough. Come on it's time to wake up. Come on Boomer. Open your eyes," Sam would coax, over and over again.

"Sweetheart, please wake up. It's Viki. Baby please talk to me. It's safe to come back. Everyone is waiting for you to wake up and talk to us. Sweetheart, we miss you. Please Todd, open your eyes!"

Blair would kiss Todd on the lips and tell him all the things Starr was up to. Tea would hold his hand and stroke his hair. She would whisper in his ear and tell him how much she loved him.

They played music for him. They tried to talk to each of the alters and try to get one of them to wake up. Todd eyes still stayed closed. Susannah feared possible brain damage.

On the fifth day after he first squeezed Tea's hand, Todd was taken off the ventilator. Finally, on day six, Todd's eyes fluttered. Viki and Sam were with him. "CALL DOCTOR HANEN!" Sam shouted, to one of the nurses. "I think he's waking up." Sam added, quietly.

"Todd. Todd. That's it Boomer. Open your eyes. Come on. It's Coach. I'm telling you to open your eyes." Susannah rushed into Todd's room. "Todd. It's Doctor Hanen," Susannah checked Todd's pupils with a penlight. "Todd! I want you to open your eyes. I know it's hard but I want you to use all your strength now and open up those eyes."

"Todd's hiding," they heard Timmy's voice whisper, slowly. Sam grabbed him in his arms and held him as tightly as Todd's fragile body and the equipment still attached to it would allow. Viki held onto Todd's hand.

Timmy's eyes opened, "My throat hurts," Timmy cried. Sam, carefully and gently, laid him back down so Susannah could look at him. "Hi, sweetie. " Tears formed in Susannah's eyes, as she leaned over the bed and stroked his cheek.

"My throat hurts a lot," Timmy whispered hoarsely, as tears trickled down his cheeks. "I know it does sweetie. I'm sorry. It hurts because there was a tube in your throat, but it's gone now and it will get better. I promise."

Timmy looked around. They could see he was becoming frightened. "This isn't my room and this isn't my house." When he saw the equipment and the various IV's that were still attached to him he started to cry for his mother.

Viki gently lifted him to her and clutched him to her chest. She hugged him and rocked him in her arms and whispered to him. "Timmy, Timmy, it's going to be all right. Darling, you're going to be okay now. Shhh, it's all right baby, shhhh." Timmy slowly calmed down and with the comforting sound of Viki's heartbeat in his ear he fell asleep in her arms. Sam put his arm around Viki. She continued to hold Timmy as he slept. She felt like she never wanted to let go. Susannah smiled at the scene before her. Never a religious person, Susannah said a silent prayer of thanks.