Don't take this personally ^_^ All of these are all copyrighted to their respectable owners. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ GUILTY VERSION 2.2: EPISODE 18= SHITTY FAN FIC ATTEMPT ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ In the far and distant future During a big fight, Guilty Gear fighters are gone away To a world of stories that bite. Edgey made a great attack, They could not even counter-act Edgey grinned a grin so sly She'll brake their brains until they cry. EVERYONE: "What... The... HELL!!" EDGEY: "I'll send them cheesy fanfics the ones that make you insane" (la la la) But they like to fight alot, so they can take the pain (la la la) Now keep in mind, they can't take control to make the fanfics stop Fighting is not the answer here Even if they want to kill each other GUILTY ROLL CALL ("Lets Rock!") Testament ("What the...?") Millia ("Oh boy!") Ky Kiske ("I don't like this") Sooooooooooool ("Go to hell") If your wondering why Edgey's mean and other pointless facts (la la la) EDGEY "Shut up and watch the fricken show! So sit down and relax" for Edgey's Theater of Brain Breaking (TWANG) ------------------------------------------------------------- {{WARNING FAIR READERS: Millia, Sol, Ky and Testament would like to appologize for their hostile behavior in todays fanfic. They, like you and me, feel pain too. Thank you.}} [[This has been an Edgey public service, we now return you To your MST. Thank you and God bless]] SOL: HARRY POOOOOTTTERRRRR!! MILLIA: What in the hell are you screaming that out for??? SOL: Well it just so happens that I read the novel today! TESTAMENT: YOU MEAN YOU CAN READ??? KY: WHAT HE CAN READ?? SOL: YES I CAN READ!! MILLIA: An amazing descovery! SOL: BITE ME! MILLIA: Oh look! Edgey is calling! SOL: HARRY POOOOTTTERRRRR!! [Office of Brain Breaking (OBB)] EDGEY: UGH! That voice is too high pitch! VENOM: It sounds like someone kicked your.. EVERYONE: FLAMING ROD! [LOBBY] EVERYONE: BOOM CHICKA WOW! [OBB] ZATO: Anyways. We figured we'd send you a fic that involves the ever so lovely Mary Sue character! EDGEY: Worse yet... the title of this fic is called "Shitty Fanfic Attempt" EVERYONE: We kid you not! EDGEY: It features someones crappy randition of the Harry Potter story. Enjoy! [LOBBY] SOL: H... H...... harry... pot...ter... *cries* EVERYONE: WE HAVE FANFIC SIGN!!!! <6 5 4 3 2 1> >>Sati stood in the top box at the quiditch world cup. SOL: (Sati) Hi! I'm a Mary-Sue... this is my story. TESTAMENT: Please let a bulger hit her in the face and she falls from the rafters! Please please please! >>The box was completely empty apart from her, >>and her father's house elf, Winky. KY: and Winky pushes her off the ledge thus ending the fic, The end... MILLIA: Dark already??? >>She paced back and forth, angrily swearing at her father under her breath. >>"Stupid prat." She muttered. "Making me go to my grandfather's school. I hate him!" MILLIA: I'm confused... So Barty Crouch has a daughter and then someone who's related to him owns a school... but that's not in the story! KY: But in order for a Mary-Sue to work, they will change anything possible to make the Mary-Sue workable! SOL: DEATH TO MARY-SUE!! >>Sati's father, Barty Crouch, was having her transferred from her old school, >>Durmstrang, to Hogwarts, where her grandfather, Albus Dumbledore, was headmaster. EVERYONE: WAIT A DARN MINUTE! SOL: (flipping through the book) I don't remember reading that!!!?? TESTAMENT: (flipping off the fic) BITE ME FIC! >>It was known to only a few, that Barty Crouch, was Barty Dumbledore, by birth. MILLIA: Known to few... BECAUSE IT DIDN'T EVEN HAPPEN!!! >>She resented her grandfather, KY: For not even being her grandfather. >>and her father for that matter, but she had to admit, they spoiled her, >>and she loved every bit of it. >>Her thoughts were interrupted when the door to the box opened SOL: Vincent from Final Fantasy 7 opened his coffin only to find where his new location is. MILLIA: (Vincent) This isn't the Shinra Mansion!! >>and in came the Weasleys, Harry Potter, and a brown, bushy haired girl. TESTAMENT: Cousin It??? >>She completely ignored every one of them except for Percy Weasley, >>her father's assistant. She gave him a small smile when he smiled at her. MILLIA: (Sati) Stuck up asshole. SOL: (Percy) Stupid hoe. >>She turned back to the quiditch pitch, and immersed herself in her inner thoughts. KY: (Sati) I wonder if they still make that shampoo I like? SOL: (Sati) so if I spit on the people in the bottom row, I can knock someone out? TESTAMENT: (Sati) I like pie. MILLIA: (Sati) Toco Bell is made of people!!! >>She was interrupted again, when Cornelius Fudge came in with another man. SOL: The other man was grabbing Fudge's butt! (Everyone gasps) >>Seeing as Fudge was the minister of magic, she couldn't ignore him, >>as much as she wanted to. Besides, Fudge spotted her, and addressed her loudly. TESTAMENT: (Fudge) LOOK EVERYONE! A MARY-SUE CHARACTER!!! >>"Ah, miss Crouch." He said. "I would like to introduce the Bulgarian minister. >> He doesn't speak a word of English." KY: (Bulgarian Minister) Je m'appelle Bite me. >>Sati smiled, she knew very well that the Bulgarian minister spoke very good English, >>but she was interested in seeing how long it took Fudge to figure that out. MILLIA: (Fudge) So what's your favorite sport? SOL: (Minister guy) Mange le mare! >>She had spoken to the Bulgarian minister on many occasions, >>but Fudge didn't need to know that. She was about to focus on the pitch again, >>but the door swung open. SOL: Killing 10, injuring hundreds! TESTAMENT: Story at 11! >>"Lucius." Said Fudge. "Wonderful to see you again." KY: (Lucius) About as wonderful as getting my ass rammed by a donkey! [Everyone looks at Ky] KY: What? >>"Good to see you too Cornelius." Replied the man. >>"I don't believe that you have met my wife, Narcissa. Or my son, Draco." MILLIA: and both of them immediatly kill Lucious for even introducing wormy guy to them. >>"Pleased to meet both of you. Am I wrong to believe that >>young Draco here goes to Hogwarts?" >>"Draco does attend Hogwarts, yes." SOL: I have a bad feeling our good friend Draco is going to have a relationship with the Mary-sue! MILLIA: UGH! SELF INSERTION MARY-SUE! TESTAMENT: Don't say insertion!! >>"Barty Crouch's daughter here," began Fudge. "Will be attending Hogwarts >>this year. Transferring from Durmstrang." >>"What year? Draco is entering year four." MILLIA: Saaaaaay... who's talking? KY: My guess is Draco likes to talk in the third person. >>"Sati is the same. You see Sati; surely you won't find >>Hogwarts as horrible as you think it is." SOL: (Sati) oh right first Voldemort is almost ressurrected, and then a Basilisk is running amoke, not to mention a convicted murder! Oh I'll have a swell time! >>"Any school where my grandfather is headmaster is sure to be a drag." Sati said. >>"Oh come, come." EVERYONE: DON'T SAY COME!! >>"As I have already informed my father, there is no way in hell that I >>am going anywhere near my grandfather, or his school." TESTAMENT: (Fudge) get the sledge hammer. >>"Your father did mention something about you being rather reluctant about going to Hogwarts." >>"Why wouldn't I be? Durmstrang is the best school in the world. And always will be." >>"You will love it there." KY: (Sati) Yeah about as much as getting a ladder shoved up my nose! >>"My ass." She turned back to the pitch, half listening to the continued conversation. TESTAMENT: What about your ass?? SOL: Sati's Ass... what is the mystery? We may never know! MILLIA: They better say something about her ass! It's the only part of this fic I understand! KY: Ass... that sounds about a good place to shove this fic up. [Everyone laughs] >>"She's impossible." Fudge was saying. "She has been like this her whole life. MILLIA: Talking about her ass? >>Her father lets her do whatever she wants. SOL: (Fudge) You know, drugs, smoking, shooting up heroin! >>Well almost anything. SOL: (Fudge) She's not allowed to smoke raisins though. >>There is no way he's letting her go back to Durmstrang." MILLIA: (Fudge) She kept on talking about her ass and she got expelled for it. >>"Must take after her grandfather." Said Lucius. >>"I should hope so." Said Sati. "As long as you're not talking about Dumbledore anyways." SOL: DUMBLEDORE IS NOT YOUR GRANDFATHER! IT'S YOUR IMAGINATION STUPID FIC GIRL!! >>"Why would I be?" Said Lucius. >>"Good. I hope I'm right in thinking I am nothing like him. He is so. so. nice. TESTAMENT: (Sati) and I'm so... so... not nice! >>It scares me how nice he can be to anyone. KY: (Sati) One time he was nice to a fly! How scary is that?? >>And then when he's around me, it's sickening. MILLIA: (Sati) What he does to my dog! UGH! >>I much prefer my other grandfather, Voldemort. EVERYONE: HUH!??!?!? TESTAMENT: OKAY FIC! YOU LOST ME!! KY: I can see why this is called a Shitty attempt at a Fic. >>Even though I've never met him." She smiled at some people's shocked faces. Especially Harry's. SOL: And Harry immediatly goes medivil on her ass! MILLIA: (HARRY) DIE YOU NOT NICE PERSON! KY: (SATI) MY ASS! MY ASS! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY ASS??? >>"Now, now Sati." Said Cornelius. >>They all fell silent; Sati turned back to the pitch, as Ludo Bagman, h >>ead of the games department at the ministry, burst into the box. >>Sati rolled her eyes. TESTAMENT: And they fell out of her eye sockets. >>"Hello Sati." Said Ludo, loudly. "Lovely to see you again." >>"Can't say the same to you." She said just as loud. >>He didn't catch the seriousness in her voice. "Ah, always one for jokes you are." >>He said laughing. [Everyone shudders] SOL: I dunno what's worse. This person not reading the novel properly or or that pompous ass' laugh?? >>She gave an exasperated sigh, and sat down in her seat, [Testament makes a farting noise while everyone else laughs] >>"will he ever clue in?" she muttered. She folded her arms across her chest, >> and waited for the game to start. >>Ludo Bagman, the commentator for the match, put a spell on his voice box, SOL: Unfortunatly it was the feedback spell >>so that everyone in the stadium could hear him. He introduced the team mascots, >>and then the players for the Bulgarian team. >>"And I give you. Dimitrove."began Ludo. "Ivanova, Zograf, Levski, Vulchanov, Volkov, KY: (Ludo) Shmearnov! Mikes hard lemonade and... EVERYONE: (singing) Beezlebub >>and. Krum!" >>Sati couldn't help but smile when he announced Krum. MILLIA: (Sati) He makes my ass tingle with glee! >>She and Viktor Krum had gone to school together the previous year. >> They had gotten into quite a bit of trouble together; sneaking into >>the teachers lounge, SOL: Having underaged sex. >>changing grades on other student's papers, and of course, the occasional bullying >>(not so occasional, in Sati's case). When Krum flew by the box, he waved, and Sati >>laughed when he almost lost control of his broom. TESTAMENT: (Sati) He broke his neck! Good for him! >>She laughed even harder when she noticed that the girl with bushy brown >>hair thought that Krum had waved to her. She could barely control her laughter. KY: Man it's like Hermione has fiber optic hair! >>"Is something funny?" Asked the girl. >>"No, its just I'm remembering. something. that ah. happened last >>time I saw a Quiditch match." She lied. SOL: (Sati) Someone got a Quaffle up the rectum! Good times good times! >>"What exactly was so funny?" asked the girl, clearly not believing Sati. MILLIA: (Sati) LOOK YOUR HAIR SUCKS OKAY!!! >>"It's just that, I was in the top box, I always get good seats. SOL: (Sati) Because I'm a made up character who is popular and mean! >>And as the players flew past, one of them waved, lost control of his broom, >>and went flying into a pillar." TESTAMENT: (Sati) He lost the use of his legs ever since! Isn't it funny?? >>She said, making it up as she went along. No one believed her. EVERYONE: Well... duh. >>"I saw that game too." Lied Draco. "It was friggin hilarious. But of course >>none of you were there. I imagine it was hard for you to come up with the money >>to get tickets to this match. SOL: (Ron) We got them for free so we didn't pay a fortune so eat my shorts rich boy! KY: Zing there Sol! >>Sati gave the girl the finger, SOL: HEY THE FIC IS FLIPPING US OFF! [Everyone gives the fanfic the finger] >>and stood up by the edge of the box again. TESTAMENT: Hermione pushes her over the ledge killing her instantly and there was much rejoicing! EVERYONE: Yay! >>She watched the game in silence. Ireland was ahead by 160 points, with a score of 170-10. >> There is no way Bulgaria can catch up now. She thought. If Krum gets the snitch, >>at least they'll go down without complete humiliation. MILLIA: Unfortunatly that means the other team can stick frozen ice pops down their trousers and give them wedgies. [all men shift uncomfortably in their chairs] >>And that's exactly what he did. KY: Get frozen ice pops shoved down his trousers and given a wedgie? Yipes! >>Lynch, the Ireland seeker went into a dive, with Krum on his tail, >>+the two seekers crashed, and while Lynch was stomped on by the Bulgarian team mascots, >>(the veela) Krum emerged with the snitch. >>"Ireland wins." Shouted Ludo. "Krum gets the snitch, but Ireland wins." EVERYONE: BREAK OUT THE GUINNEASE!!!! >>Sati gave a small smile. She had personally wanted Bulgaria to win, >> but she didn't want to let the over excited weasleys know that, >>in fear that they might clobber her, which she deemed was very likely. SOL: Yeah because their not bloodsucking snobs like you! KY: I'd clobber her for the fun of it all! >>"I'm going down to the pitch." She whispered to Winky. She slipped out >>of the box and practically bounced down the steps. It wasn't until she got >>to the bottom, that she realized that Draco had followed her. MILLIA: She could smell the oil in his hair a mile away! >>"Why did you cover up for me?" she asked. "I mean, when I was laughing. And I lied." SOL: (Draco) Because your ass gives me that funny feeling in my tummy. >>"There was no way that I was going to let Granger have the >>satisfaction of knowing she was right." >>"Granger?" >>"Bushy hair." EVERYONE: Cousin It??? >>"Oh, I see. You don't like her." EVERYONE: AND WE DON'T LIKE YOU, SATI! >>"No. So. do you know Krum?" >>"We're friends from school. In fact I'm going to try and find him now." >>"Mind if I come?" >>"Knock yourself out." SOL: (Sati) Not really.. knock yourself out! You'll be doing the world a favor! >>They headed to the Bulgarian side of the field. KY: Fortuneatly a Lepracaun from the Irish team crapped on their heads. >>She made her way towards the Bulgarian change rooms. >>She would have walked right in, if she hadn't been stopped by a body >>guard like person at the door. >>"Oh come on." She said angrily. "Do you honestly think I'm going to go in there, >>and murder the team? MILLIA: She wants to have a look at their weeners! SOL: So does Draco EVERYONE: ZING! >>Puhleeze." TESTAMENT: Talk to the hand! >>"Sati?" asked a voice. Sati recognized Krum's voice immediately. >>"Viktor. I'm coming in there. So you all better have your pants on. KY: So much for the mens ring toss game. [Everyone else shudders] >>I know a very good severing charm, if you catch my drift." SOL: Oh I get it! Sati is one of those characters that were cut from the origanil draft because she's too mean and crude and so *Beeping* STUPID! >>She walked into the change room, dragging Draco behind her. >>The team members were dressed, and lounging around on the benches, >>with glum looks on their faces. MILLIA: (Team member) Did you have to bring HIM along?? >>"Oh cheer up. It's not that bad. You guys were much better anyways. >>And besides, Ireland had the hometown advantage, you didn't." >>"You'd think she'd be cheering for Ireland wouldn't you." Krum said to his teammates. KY: (Sati) Their mascot crapped on my head! I hate them! >>"Oh shut up. You know I support Bulgaria fully. And despise anyone who doesn't." >>"And I suppose this guy with you was cheering for us too." TESTAMENT: (Draco) Me? I was here for the food! >>"I don't know. I didn't ask him." TESTAMENT: (Draco) But I... >>"Do you even know him?" TESTAMENT: (Draco) But I mean... >>"Met him before the match." TESTAMENT: (Draco) If I can only say.. >>She turned to Draco. "You were cheering for Bulgaria, weren't you?" >>"Yes." Draco assured her. "Of course." SOL: (Draco) Just so psycho bitch won't get mad I'll say that. >>"Draco. Sati." Called Ludo from outside the change room. "Come out now." MILLIA: (Draco) But they were going to teach us how to play "Pin the Tail in the Donkey!" SOL: UGH! MILLIA THAT'S LUDE! MILLIA: Sorry... sorry... I'm going lower then this fic! I appologize! >>Draco shrugged, and they headed out. >>"What now?" asked Sati impatiently. >>"Next time you are to tell someone when you go traipsing around." EVERYONE: "Traipsing"? SOL: My brain! *sobs* >>"I told Winky." >>"House elves don't count." TESTAMENT: Because house elves aren't people! MILLIA: S.P.E.W IS IN DA HOUSE! W00t W00t! KY: HOUSE ELVES HAVE RIGHTS TO BEE-OTCH! >>"They count for me Mr. Bagman. Besides, its not like my father even showed up >>to watch the game, so I doubt he cares." SOL: Face it Sati, daddy hates you. >>"Actually, your father is worried sick about you." MILLIA: He's worried that something DIDN'T happen to her. >>"Somehow I highly doubt that." EVERYONE: So do we! >>She followed him, all the same. Draco right beside her. MILLIA: So Draco is immediatly her bitch? What the hell! >>First they stopped by The Malfoy's campsite. Their tent was more like a mansion. >>It had turrets, towers, a mote, and even a drawbridge. TESTAMENT: And a giant man eating bunny too! >>Draco stayed there, and Ludo brought Sati to her campsite. >>Her tent, was also a magical tent, but hers was much less elegant than the Malfoy's. >>She had a separate tent from her father, which suited her just fine. >>Inside, it was like a completely furnished, four storey house, >>with everything she needed, inside of it. It looked tiny from the outside, >>but once on the interior, it was completely different. SOL: I wish the Lobby of Brain Breaking was like that! TESTAMENT: Yeah all we get is a fridge full of cheez whiz and hamdingers and a bean bag chair! >>It was getting late, so she put her pajamas on and curled up in bed with a book. MILLIA: Ironically it was the REAL Harry Potter book. >>She was almost asleep, when she heard numerous screams. KY: RUN! CARROT TOP AND MICHEAL JACKSON HAVE JOINED FORCES! SOL: THEY HAVE BANNANA WARMERS AND THEY'RE NOT AFRAID TO WHERE 'EM! >>She sat upright, TESTAMENT: (Sati) I wet my bed! >>and her book fell to the floor beside her. She tiptoed out of bed and poked >>her head out of the tent. All around, people were running to wards the pitch, >>screaming and yelling about flying muggles. MILLIA: Well... that's something you don't see all day! >>She slipped on her sandals, and went to her father's tent. >>There was no one there. Not even Winky. Oh sure, go help other >> people but forget completely about your only daughter. EVERYONE: Who wouldn't forget her? >>What an idiot. TESTAMENT: So says the dessert to the grain of sand. MILLIA: ZING! >>She stopped someone and asked what was going on. He ignored her, >>and ran on. That was pointless. She ran back to her tent, grabbed her >> wand and hurried after the crowd. She ran like mad. Pushing people aside, >>and trying and failing to keep warm at the same time. SOL: Why won't she just use a fire spell on herself? >>She bumped pushed through to people and tripped over a body on the ground. KY: Never EVER look an angry Micheal Jackson in the eye. Yipes. >>"watch it." She said angrily. "And if I were you, I'd get my ass off >>the ground before someone else steps on you." >>The moonlight illuminated the face of Harry Potter, The bushy haired girl, EVERYONE: Cousin It?? >>and on the ground at her feet, was one of the weasleys. She laughed and ran on, MILLIA: This character makes no sense!! She's mean and evil but at the same time she wants to help out the muggles? MAKE UP YOUR *BEEPING* MIND!! >>not noticing Draco standing by the tree. KY: Taking a leak. >>She kept going, but soon had a huge cramp. SOL: You shouldn't eat and then run! >>She stopped with her back to a tree, TESTAMENT: But it ended up being a Whomping Willow! DOH! >>she crouched on the ground, and watched as the three stooges >>(Harry, the Weasley boy, and bushy) EVERYONE: BUSHY? KY: This person sounds like they just read the book description on the back! >>ran past her. After a while she walked a bit farther. >>She heard twigs snapping behind her, in the bushes. MILLIA: someones walking in Hermione's hair?? >>"Hello?" she whispered. "Anyone there." [[Testament does the Jaws theme]] >>Must be my imagination. She walked farther, and came to a clearing. >>The three stooges were there too. KY: Larry, Moe and Curly?? >>Sitting under a tree. Then she heard the twigs snapping. >>"Tell me I'm not imagining that." She said to them. TESTAMENT: (Harry) oh it's just a giant bear going to chew your head off. No big worry. >>"You're not. I heard it too." Said Harry. From behind him, they heard someone say, SOL: I LIKE CHEESE WHIZ! KY: FEEL MY FART OF DOOM! MILLIA: ROCK AND ROLL! WHOOOOOOOOOO! TESTAMENT: I HAVE NO MORE TOILET PAPER!! >>"MORSMORDRE." A green skull appeared over top of them. >>Sati screamed. It was the dark mark. People all around screamed, but not nearly as loud as Sati. SOL: (Sati) I AM A MARY-SUE, I AM! >>"Calm down." Said Harry. KY: Who has been reduced to a MINOR character. >>She screamed even louder. TESTAMENT: (Sati) YOUR FACE DESTURBES ME! IEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! >>She ran for cover under the trees on the other side of the clearing, SOL: (Sati) It's not safe! It's not safe! It's not safe! >>so did the other three. They were in the middle of the clearing when they >>heard all sorts of popping noises all around them. MILLIA: Draco thought it was funny to stick cracklers down Neville's pants. >>Figures appeared, each one with a wand pointed at them. KY: Who's that wizard doing Tai Chi? EVERYONE: It's me! It's me! >>"Duck." Shouted Harry. EVERYONE: WHERE? >>They did, just as each wizard shouted 'stupify'. SOL: How come a Distrubed song few right into my head once when they said that? >>Sati felt the wind blow over her head, and then heard someone say, TESTAMENT: Shimmy Shimmy coco puffs. >>"That's my son." It was Mr. Weasley. He came forward. "Ron, Harry, Hermione, are you okay." >>Then the voice of Sati's father cut in. "out of the way Arthur. Which one of you three did it?" TESTAMENT: (as a distant voice) I did it! >>he said to the three. He hadn't noticed Sati yet. MILLIA: Because she doesn't exist silly! >>"I'm here too father." She said. "And none of us did it. It was someone >>in the bushes. They said a spell, and it appeared." >>The ministry wizards checked the bushes, EVERYONE: Hermione's hair?? >>and emerged a minute later, with the body of Winky. >>"Winky." Cried Sati, "but how? Why? Winky doesn't have a wand. She couldn't have." >>"She was holding a wand miss crouch." Said on of the ministry wizards. "What?" KY: Umm.. who said "What?" >>"Sati, go back to your tent." Said her dad. >>"But." >>"Now please." EVERYONE: MY ASS! >>Sati trudged away, muttering something about overprotective fathers. >>She didn't go to the campsite; instead she wandered aimlessly all around the area. SOL: And ran into a tree! DOH! >>She found her way to the section where all of the Bulgarian fans were. >>She went through them, smiling at all the people she passed. MILLIA: (Sati) I'm better then you, you, you and you! >>She then came to all of the Ireland fans. She ignored them, >>and continued on her way to her campsite. She reached her campsite, >>and her father still wasn't back yet. She crawled into her tent, >>and sat in the kitchen part. She was sitting down, when she heard >>a group of teenagers outside her site. KY: YOU JUST SAID SHE SAT IN THE KITCHEN PART! WE ALREADY KNOW SHE'S SITTING! >>She poked her head out of her tent. >>"Shut the fuck up." She yelled. SOL: Now THAT isn't in the books! >>"Make us bitch." One of them said to her. KY: Neither is THAT! MILLIA: Maybe this is the story that made parents think the book was Satanic? >>"I will." She stormed out of her tent, and stomped over to the group. TESTAMENT: Making a squishy squish noise every time she made a step. >>She slapped a guy across the face, and the others backed off, SOL: (Teenager) We weren't expecting a girl to beat us up! RUN! >>all but one. It was Draco. KY: (Draco) My hair sense it was you. >>"Hello Sati." He said. "Quite the attitude you've got." >>"Oh, its you." She sneered. >>"Yes, it's me." EVERYONE: MARIO! >>he sneered back. "Did you enjoy tripping over that git Weasley?" MILLIA: (Sati) Tripping over Weasley's are fun! >>"You were there? Anyways, yes I did enjoy it." EVERYONE: HUH? KY: Personally I'd sue him for injuring me! >>"Care to join us?" he asked. >>"That depends, what are you doing?" SOL: (Draco) Smoking raisins. >>"Well, let me see here, reeking havoc, waking people up, and pissing off the ministry." KY: (Draco) And pissing off... EVERYONE: The stinky guy! >>He said, sure that she wouldn't go with them, in fears of upsetting her father. >>"I'm in." said Sati. >>"What about your father?" he asked uncertainly. EVERYONE: What about him? >>"Screw him." She said angrily. MILLIA: Ugh! Why would I want to??? >>"He wouldn't give a shit anyways." She stalked over to Draco, giving him a >>look that said 'I'm no innocent little girl'. SOL: To me I interpreted it as "I'm a marshmellow" KY: I dunno, I thought it ment "I'm so not nice" MILLIA: Me it screamed out "Look at my world! I'm a bitch" TESTAMENT: I thought that look said "I like ham" >>They wandered around, for a few hours, making as much noise as possible. SOL: (sarcastically) Oh that looks like fun. >>They were screaming and yelling, with bottles of beer in their hands, EVERYONE: HUH? KY: Where did the beer come from? SOL: They probably did the spell "Beerolosis" [Beers appears in everyones hands] TESTAMENT: I gotta learn me that one! >>when about five ministry wizards approached them. One of them was her father. >>"Shit" she muttered. "Hide me." EVERYONE: NO! >>she hid between to girls, and dropped the empty beer bottle that was in her hand. >>The ministry wizards told them all to go back to their tents, and then left. MILLIA: Oh jeez! That'll stop them! >>"Whew. That was close." She stepped out from behind the girls, and swayed a bit. >>"What's wrong with her?" asked a boy. SOL: (Draco) she's a Mary-Sue, they get antsy sometimes. >>"Oh god." KY: (in low voice) WHAT?? >>Said Draco. "She's drunk. Does anyone know how much she drank?" >>"3 bottles." Said a girl. SOL: When did she drink the beers??? When she was hiding behind them?? Ugh I need a smoke! SMOKECANCEROUS! [Ciggarettes appear in Sol's hand and he takes one and lights it up] SOL: *sighs* I'm glad I learned the useful spells. >>"Damn it. If we don't get her back to her tent soon, she'll get in shit. >>Not to mention, she'll rat us out too." MILLIA: I thought she wasn't an innocent girl? >>They brought her to her campsite, and a few of the girls brought her inside. >>She woke the next morning with a killer hang over. SOL: Serves her right for not drinking the beer they said she did! [they all wait] KY: Fics over? MILLIA: Yeah... EVERYONE: TELEPORTTY!!! [Everyone dissappears from the theatre] <1 2 3 4 5 6> MILLIA: I hate to ask... but what's with all the potion stuff? TESTAMENT: Well, this fic made me realize how people just forget the art of potion mastery! KY: Uh oh (hides under a table) TESTAMENT: Well I'm going to do an experiment that makes the ultimate soft drink! MWA HA HA HA HA SOL: oh yeah? (turns to Millia) Koo Koo! TESTAMENT: Add alittle this... alitte that and... **BOMB!!!** (Super Mario 2 style) TESTAMENT: SWEET! EVERYONE: WHAT?? TESTAMENT: I managed to turn water into beer! EVERYONE: SWEET! (Everyone takes alittle bit of the Fast Brewed Testa-beer(tm) ) TESTAMENT: Fast Brewed Testa-beer(tm) Because water just isn't enough! The End... For now STINGER: **"My Ass!"**