Don't take this personally ^_^ All of these are all copyrighted to their respectable owners. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ GUILTY VERSION 2.2: EPISODE 15= CLOUDS MISTAKE ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ In the far and distant future During a big fight, Guilty Gear fighters are gone away To a world of stories that bite. Edgey made a great attack, They could not even counter-act Edgey grinned a grin so sly She'll brake their brains until they cry. EVERYONE: "What... The... HELL!!" EDGEY: "I'll send them cheesy fanfics the ones that make you insane" (la la la) But they like to fight alot, so they can take the pain (la la la) Now keep in mind, they can't take control to make the fanfics stop Fighting is not the answer here Even if they want to kill each other GUILTY ROLL CALL ("Lets Rock!") Testament ("What the...?") Millia ("Oh boy!") Ky Kiske ("I don't like this") Sooooooooooool ("Go to hell") If your wondering why Edgey's mean and other pointless facts (la la la) EDGEY "Shut up and watch the fricken show! So sit down and relax" for Edgey's Theater of Brain Breaking (TWANG) ------------------------------------------------------------- SOL: Oh hi everyone, Sol Badguy here. I'm in a very good mood... does anyone wanna know why? MILLIA: No.. TESTAMENT: Not useful.. KY: I don't care what you think... SOL: Well I'll say it anyways... A FINAL FANTASY SEVEN FIC! WITH TIFA!! MY TIFA!! MILLIA: Edgey! This isn't another hentai is it??? [Office of Brain Breaking (OBB)] EDGEY: No no no! Actually it's a normal fic! [LOBBY] SOL: (Stops dancing) Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat??? Nooooo!! You can't do this to me!! [OBB] EDGEY: BUT I CAN! I CAN! VENOM: You wanna know why? ZATO: It's because... ALL: WE'RE EVIL! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL!!! [LOBBY] KY: (under his breath) and stupid... [OBB] EDGEY: Well you guinea pigs! Enjoy your fic! [LOBBY] SOL: TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFAAAAAAAAAA!! EVERYONE: WE HAVE FANFIC SIGN!!! <6 5 4 3 2 1> >>Authors Notes: ...Well I'm being pushed into this by Sara KY: Fanfiction by force! How to stop the circle! SOL: Next on Dr. Phil! >>*pokes tongue out at her* but well here goes. >>This is just coming straight out of my brain >>and into the computer! SOL: So it's a blank page? MILLIA: No author bashing until we see the whole fic Sol! SOL: But... it's not hentai... and Tifa won't go bouncy bouncy... ;_; TESTAMENT: Lost cause... >>Enjoy. R&R!! WARNING: There is a >>litttttttttttttttttttttle bit of language... >>hardly any but still. TESTAMENT: Anyone offended by the words F*** shouldn't read this! >>Tifa glared at Cloud, MILLIA: (Tifa) for the last time! STOP WEARING MY CLOTHING!! >>"I still can't believe you asked HER >>to go with you and not me!" she said. KY: Yuffie? SOL: Dear god... Barret in the Sailor outfit? TESTAMENT: Probably one of the men from the Honey Bee Inn. >>Cloud looked at her and then at Aeris, SOL: Choose Aeris! Leave Tifa for meeeeeeeeeeeee! >>he had no idea how he'd gotten into this predicament. MILLIA: That's easy. He asked Aeris out and not Tifa. Whatta Chocobo head! KY: Let the Cloud bashing Begin! >>"But I'm going with you! Not Aeris... >>so what's the problem?" Cloud asked confused. SOL: As we are... who the hell did he say that too!? >>Tifa huffed at him, "If you don't understand I'm >>not even going to try and talk to you." KY:; (Tifa) I tried even doing simple graphs and a puppet show but you still don't get it you putz! >>she said storming away. SOL: Bouncing in the process making me one jolly ripe old elf. *drools* MILLIA: Jolly ripe old elf??? >>Cloud stared after her and turned to Squall, EVERYONE: HUH!? TESTAMENT: We have crossover sign and we didn't even expect it. My brain hurts! >>"Do you understand??" he asked. EVERYONE: HUH?? MILLIA: Why did he say that?? >>Squall looked at him blankly, "Whatever." >>he said folding his arms. >>Rinoa sidled up beside him, "Hi Squall." she giggled. KY: (Squall) Whatever >>He turned his head to look at her for a second, >>a blank look still on his face, "Whatever." KY: I was right! SOL: For a first... >>(we see Yuffie sneaking up behind Cloud >>and trying to steal some of his materia) >>Cloud turned around and smacked Yuffie on the head >>lightly with the hilt of his sword. MILLIA: Knocking her out KY: Lightly with THAT sword... she'd be lucky if she escaped without a concussion! >>She quickly ran over to Aeris rubbing her head. >>"Aeris! Cloud hit me again!" she whined. >>Aeris started telling Cloud off, TESTAMENT: (Aeris) I was supposed to get the first hit in Clod!! >>"Cloud! Honestly! Why do you always hit her! >>You know you'd think after all this time.." SOL: Cloud... think???? >>She went on and on but Cloud had by that time just tuned her out. TESTAMENT: (Cloud) Whatever KY: (Squall) That's my line! >>'I don't know WHAT Tifa's problem is. MILLIA: (Cloud) So I want to see another woman on the side, so what? >>She's going with me isn't she? Maybe I'll ask Rinoa... >>no but she's a girl and she won't tell me either... EVERYONE: HUH?? >>Selphie? Nope she's probably jumping up and down somewhere... TESTAMENT: Funny enough when she's doing that, Irvine is missing as well. >>I swear what a ditz that girl is! Irvine...yeah that's >>the last person I'd ever go to for advice. >>I'd be more likely to get hit by Tifa if I listened to him. SOL: Fic... you're hurting my brain!? Wouldn't Tifa just hit Cloud for the hell of it? MILLIA: Sol... that's what you would do. SOL: Well I think everyone should have a shot at Chocobo head! >>So...who? Squall has Rinoa and I guess he's good with women... >>but the only thing he ever says is whatever... KY: (Squall) Whatever.... >>how boring..okay WHO CAN HELP ME?...Quistis? QUISTIS! YEAH!' SOL: Wouldn't the Trepies be around her then??? >>Cloud quietly walked outside without Aeris noticing >>as she continued to rant. He quickly wandered over to >>where Quistis usually sat reading some book about whips. TESTAMENT: Makes it sound like it's Quistis... Bondage addition! SOL: Get the latest in whip technology! MILLIA: Order now and you get a free Whip for starters guide! KY: call 1-800-WHIP-ME! >>And where was she? SOL: In the Bathroom? KY: Signing autographs for the Trepies? MILLIA: Singing in the rain? TESTAMENT: Whipping Cid to a bloody pulp for even starring in "Yuffie's Chocobo" SOL: GRAAAH! WHY MUST YOU REMIND US??? >>Exactly where he'd thought she would be. >>And what was she reading? A book on whips. >>'She's predictable but if she can help me then >>she can be as predictable as she likes!' MILLIA: Does Cloud speakey English yah? >>"Hey Quistis." Cloud said. >>Quistis looked up for a moment, "Hello Cloud." she said slowly. >>She watched him for a minute waiting for him to say something, "Look I don't >>mean to be rude but...spit it out!" SOL: (Quistis) YOU WHERE WITH SEPHIROTH A MINUTE AGO SO SPIT IT OUT!!! DON'T SWALLOW!!! TESTAMENT: Sweet merciful crap that was sick!! SOL: Ow!! >>Cloud nodded, "Um...well you see...I asked >>Aeris to go with me to this show thing... >>and she said no so I asked Tifa. >>And she was really happy to go and then she >>found out I'd asked Aeris first and her second. SOL: FINALLY!!! We know what's going on in this fic!!! >>So now she's mad at me and I don't know why. MILLIA: BECAUSE SHE'S THE SECONDS UNICORN HEAD!!! >>Why is she mad Quistis?" he asked all in one breath. KY: (Immatating Cloud) My name's Cloud and I'm the biggest idiot ever!!! >>Quistis stared at him for a second, "Do I look like a fricken >>psycaiatrist to you? Why come to me? Go away I'm reading." >>she said looking back down at her book. TESTAMENT: (Quistis) I WILL be better then Betty Page dammit! >>Cloud glared at her as he walked away. >>'Cow. SOL: Oooooo there's a shot! >>So now who do I go to? Aeris was always the one >>to tell me what I did wrong but she's pretty mad at >>me for hitting Yuffie...I mean it's not like it hurt her!' MILLIA: (Cloud) Just because she was hospitalized that one time means NOTHING!! >>Cloud sighed and went and sat on a bench. KY: (Cloud) Guess I'll just ask Zell out on a date then. >>Tifa came up behind him, >>"Cloud?" she asked as she sat down beside him. >>He looked at her, "Tifa! Hi! You're not...er...going to hit >>me are you?" he asked slightly moving away. EVERYONE: HIT HIM! HIT HIM!! >>She laughed and shook her head, "No...Cloud I >>realise now why you asked Aeris first." SOL: (Tifa) Because you wanted that swave Sol Badguy to date me instead. TESTAMENT: You wish! >>Cloud raised an eyebrow, MILLIA: The people's eyebrow. KY: If you smell what Cloud is cooking >>"You do?" he asked confused. >>Tifa nodded, "It wasn't because you like her more. It was because >>she never get's asked anywhere! And I feel so happy that you are >>that caring and considerate to ask her even if she said no." EVERYONE: Aaaaaaaaaawwww. >>Cloud looked confused, "But the reason I asked her was because >>I wanted to go with her." he said bluntly. SOL: Did I just here a toilet flush? TESTAMENT: Clod just single handedly destoryed that moment. >>Tifa froze for a second, "Cloud!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >>You JERK!" she yelled, smacking him over and over again. EVERYONE: TIFA TIFA! GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TIFA! >>He rolled off the rock, EVERYONE: HUH?? KY: Didn't the author say he sat on a bench???? >>"I was kidding!" he lied, "I was! I just wanted >>to see your...er...response." >>Tifa smiled, "Oops..sorry. Now let's go put some ice on that black eye of yours." SOL: So she gets it from the ice box she was sitting on. >>Cloud nodded. >>"Whoo got out of that one! I nearly >>stuffed that up!" Cloud said outloud. EVERYONE: WAAAH WAAAH WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! >>Tifa stopped walking and stared at him. >>Cloud looked at her, "I said that outloud didn't I?" he asked. >>Tifa's response was simple and painful. TESTAMENT: She put him in a double jock lock KY: double jock lock? TESTAMENT: A wedgie... but much much worse. >>The last thing Cloud saw was Tifa's fist coming towards him SOL: I'LL DATE YOU TIFA!! PICK ME! PICK ME!! >>"That'll teach him to ask her first." Tifa said stepping >>on him as she walked over and linked arms with Aeris, >>"What a creep!" she said. >>Aeris nodded, "Totally!" KY: Did I just read what I think I read???? MILLIA: Now Sol will never have a chance with her! SOL: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! TESTAMENT: I guess we better console him.... or at least taunt him endlessly! MILLIA: Sounds good to me! KY: Ooo! Ooo! count me in!! <1 2 3 4 5 6> SOL: Oh Tifa dear! Why did you have to love Cloud and become a lesbian because he woundn't date you?? MILLIA: Sol... it's only a fic... TESTAMENT: With a crossover... KY: and it was badly written... SOL: I DON'T CARE! TESTAMENT: I smell a song... SOL: I met a girl and Tifa was her name. Her chest size is D and the size of my love is the same. Oh I loooooove you girl! And Tifa was her naaaaaaa~aame! MILLIA: Who the hell is playing the piano?? SOL: Ooooh Tifa! Ooooh Tifa!! Oooooh Tifa!! Ooooh Tifa!! KY: Moron... SOL: I know a girl! And Aeris is her name. I wish her death for taking my Tifa away! I hope Sephiroth impales you! Ooo Aeris go away!! Ooooo yeaaaaaaaah! MILLIA: that was a new twist.. O_O SOL: [talking during the song like in old 50's tunes] Oh Tifa, my heart was taken away. Your beauty! Your strenght... Your shabadoos! They invigorate me! Why, oh why did you have to love Cloud and then turn lesbian because of it? Oh sweet Tifa! I just can't see striaght anymore, because I was hit in the head with a crow bar! Oh Tifa can't you see SOL: YOU'RE MY GIIII-RRR-RRRL!! OOOOH TIFA!! (Everyone with Sol) EVERYONE: Ooooooh Tifa!! Ooooooh Tifa!! Dear Tiiii-eeee-eee.... faaaaaa... MILLIA: So what do you think about that Edgey??? [OBB] EDGEY: Well I took a census with everyone in the room here and frankly.. EVERYONE: We think it really really sucks. EDGEY: Venom.. hit the button... The End... for now! STINGER: "But I'm going with you! Not Aeris... so what's the problem?"