03.15.02-03.27.02
03.27.02 03.26.02 03.19.02 03.18.03 03.16.02 03.15.02 03.27.02 03.26.02 03.19.02 03.18.03 03.16.02 03.15.02seven weeks of staying up allll night! ------ oh well. not really. kind of just one. coming up. i already know im going to study with david over break, but thats my only plan. we are going to get 5s on all our AP test and at least 1400s on our SATs. thats our goal.
my eyeballs hurt. let me see, today today, during math i did a computer assignment, physics we had a fun quiz and a guest speaker and tomorrow we are taking notes on Apollo 13. physics note. im laughing. haha, today during history, mr burke didnt show up for the first, like, ten minutes, and then he came with these drugged up gay men to talk to us about life. then in english we did absolutely nothing, except david and justin tried to ignore me, but im just too irristible. then i ended up giving justin money. im a sucka. lunch was cut short because i had to go take a math test and i took it and it wasnt that bad and i really hope i did well. because i think i did. then i went home and basically that all. read ch 28 in history and went to choir.
at choir, we sang this pretty song, and then this druid song, and then we got to sing lying on the floor on our backs. it was so cool. we sang two or three fun songs that we all know by heart and it was just fun. Yonder Come Day and Lord, Have Mercy. wonderful wonderful songs. tomorrow is maundy thursay, and then good friday, and the sadurday and then easter sunday. on sadurday i have to babysit, but that means money, yay.
david and i are working on a after school special for the 21st century, so look for that coming.
what im listening to: elliot smith on the bootylicious disk./ what im wearing: l.e.i. jeans and my argyle sweater/ what im thinking: <my eyes really are hurting.>
okay, so i havent updated in a while. but i have every good reason why. ive been terribly horribly no good very badly sick. from wednesday night to yesterday, i was bed ridden with fever and cough and cold and that type stuff. i wont go into details. but anyway, im back. i went to school today, and i successfully pushed back the math test i missed another day, so im taking it tomorrow during fifth. i think im okay, but everyone is saying its really really hard, so i dont know how ill do. i have a physics quiz tomorrow, and i have three days of assignments to make up, but i think ill do okay without making them all up yet, so ive only done one. i also have to make up a history test, which hopefully hell let me do thursday because i didnt have time to read it tonight. those things take hours of time. and money.
i helped my sister with her math and then we had some fun laughing. its was nice. i showed her the note justin wrote me today ("justin bradley is sexier than carrot top") and she goes "are you in love with this justin kid?" (i always ask her if shes in love with anyone she talks about) and i said yes, but as like a brother more than a lover. then she goes "is that the justin from la veta?" "yes" "the one you used to say was your cousin or something?" and then i remembered that we used to tell kids on the bus that we were brother and sister but we lived n different houses because he lived with our mom and i lived with our dad. and then crystal says "and you told people bill clinton was your uncle" and we did that too! ahhh.. goodtimes of lying. im going to have to remember to remind justin about all this.
i babysit on friday night. mo' money, less problems. i need to get shirley a birfday present and take malmal shopping or something for her (very late but much deserved) birfday present. i still need a job, and i think i aspire too high, and im going to go look into shoe storees at the mall and the block. id like the block better though, me thinks. i mean, i hate the block, but i like their shoes better. oh yes, i do. i should apply to some restaurants too. maybe johnny rebs. okay. i hope you didnt miss me TOO much, and i really dont know why im still doing this stupid thing because it lack content and readers.
what im wearing: green top and cherry pjs/ what im listening to: burn one down is in my head/ what im thinking: <"if you dont like my fire, then dont come around, cause im gonna burn one do-o-own, im gonna burn one, down.">
Im so discontented. i dont even know if that is a real word. I need something to do with my life. I need a job. i have nothing to do after school, during school, ever. I am going into a slump. I was thinking (last night, as i laid in bed, trying to fall asleep, which didnt occur until 2 hours after i started trying) about my life. I go to school and do the same thing every day. I dont even need to attend 4/5 of my classes because of the lack of content. i come home, and i do nothing. luckily i havent taken up eating as a way to waste my time. im actually losing weight, although i have stopped kickboxing because i feel dumb doing it when other people are in the house. but anyway... I am planning prom, but i wont have a date because all my guy friends either 1) have girlfriends 2) hate dances 3) have already gone to a dance with me 4) are potheads 5) are potheads with girlfriends who hate dances and have already gone to a dance with me or 6) have way better options for dates than myself. now, this goes for guys asking me to prom and me asking guys to sadies, but im more broken up and depressed about prom than sadies because i really want to go to prom, and i really want a boy to ask me, especially after what happened with prom last year (id rather not indulge into the details). i took a step toward employment and turned an app into barnes and noble today, but they said they hire according to experience and availablilty, and im plenty available, but not at all experienced. i can read, though, and um... i like books. i also got some applications, and im going to go to *shudder* the block tomorrow and get some more. i have so little life, and what i do have is so routine it drives me crazy insane. i want to meet new people, but that doesnt happen to girls like me. im too geeky. and unattractive.
i hate it when i get like this, when i feel all dependant upon other people in order to make myself feel better, and i feel as though other people arent around to make me feel better. its not like i want pity, its like i want a boyfriend. and i HATE wanting a boyfriend. more than anything, because it shows I have a weakness that I criticize in others. i am hypocrites.
what im listening to: the gurgle of my hungry stomach, but the old mother hubbard style the inside of my cupboards are taking on./ what im wearing: micah shirt, cherry pajamas/ what im thinking: <what i did today doesnt even matter.>
WELL, i STARTED to write a entry for yesterday, but my damn comouter froze up, so i stopped. yesterday is summed up in the next few words (in chronological order) : sleepy, dancing, hungry, bored, embarrassed, sleep, oops, singing, eating, talking, sleep. notice that sleep dominates. i will write the rest of today's tonight, because, today is only half over, my dear. and i think i want to go to deidrichs tonight, if anyone is available.
later... much, much later...
"cause waking up is hard to do-ooo" oh man, it was so hard to wake up this morning. school was normal, except stupit justin kicked me in the shin during english. my shins bruise so easily and it hurts so much. the bruises never ever go away. ever. so yeah... that. after school em and i went to in n out and got some free food, and then i went home, and ate some more. today i ate like a fatty. yogurt in the morning, cheeseburger and yogurt when i got home, and then a bunch of rice, corn yummy stuff and two carnitas tacos for dinner. yopliat, i must reiterate, is SO good. harvest cherry and french vanilla = my favorite. okay, enough about food. lets talk about sleep. i slept for three hours when i got home, and then i went and got my physics book from school where there was some crazy kids concert going on so it was a mad house trying to get out of there. and the sun was horrible in my eyes. i got home and chilled for a while until dinner. oh dinner was so good. my mom makes carnitas.... oh... mmm... so good... thats right, takeshi, this is all for me. haha, spirit week moment. okay, so then i did my physics, which makes me feel like ive accomplished something, because i have nothing to do anymore since water polo ended. i feel so lazy, but im so lazy i havent applied for a job yet. and whenever i talk about it, i feel even more lazy and useless. okay, so then i read, and ate more corn yummy, and now here. im going to go read some more, so, thats my entry for the day.
what im listening to: nothing./ what im wearing: white tank top, express jeans, unmatching socks/ what im thinking: "cotton rust is POtash Starvation!"
i have a cold. my nose hurts me, and now i am starting to feel sick all over, which i havent been feeling in the past few days, even though my nose has been hating me. i brought a box of tissues to julias house. my nose is all red like and im really self conscience. con-science. with science. or... against science. how can con mean with AND against? i just dont get it.
so, i woke up and i blew my nose, and i remember i was dreaming about taking showers... in big rooms... it was weird, because everyone was taking a shower together and it was like, okay, but we went into a room with huge windows for walls and we didnt want to take showers in there because someone might see us. anyway, i woke up at 9:30, surprisingly early for how tired i felt last night, and instead of taknig a shower DIRECTLY from bed, which is what i always do, i went into the living room and watched some TLC with me dad. i really like home improvement shows. i dont know why. so i watched tlc for a while, and then i took a shower. i got dressed and the next few hours are a blur.... more tlc, maybe i watched a movie? i dont remember, then my sister and i watched jeff corwin and man, hes funny, and we laughed together, which is all we do, EVER. then she fell asleep so i had no one to laugh with, so i went to read history, and i got sidetracked so i ate some... muffin? or... oh! i ate some fish and asparagus, and then i went and read some more history, and it seemed like i was reading forever, and i decided i couldnt finish, so i have to finish tomorrow. zoot suits were worn by mexican-american gangs during WWII. so cool to know. um... then i think i went online, and then i went to get an SAT book at barnes and noble (you know what bugs me? when people say "barnes and nobles" that bugs me.) and i need a job, and im a lazy buttface, and then i got home and i drank a bunch of water and went online some more and drank more water and ate dinner, and did the dishes and then i went to julias. ahh... a home away from home. a place to bring your tissues. nick and jake came over and we started watching a pretty funny movie, but we got sidetracked and then we went to deidrichs and that was a lot of fun. The guy performing played "maxwell's silver hammer" by the beatles, and it was cool. so we (I) tipped him. we stayed there until 10:30 and wet back to julias where we just talked for a while and i started feeling pretty ill so i came home. and now im here. and my journal has bnecome so UNINTERESTING, and im sorry. write me hate mail, and maybe ill have reason to change it. because, as of now, i write this for myself, to feel like i have a purpose, because my life is so meaningless right now. im so bored with everything. but at least i dont think its my fault anymore... im just in a bad situation at the moment, it has nothing to do with the quality of my persona. and thats a good feeling.
what im listening to: "bang bang maxwell's silver hammer" running through my head/ what im wearing: my NEW favorite PERFECT express jeans and mt white collared shirt and my sisters white pumas. i love pumas./ what im thinking: <i really hope i dont get really sick. im getting sleepy.... and i didnt do my kick boxing yet....>
today was pie, or... cake. except i think i screwed up majorly on a physics quiz, but the rest of the day was so easy. after school i took emily home, and we had shakes at carls jr and we had a grand ol' time. then i went home and lounged and mallory called and we talked on the phone, which is whacky, because we dont ever talk on the phone, and then mal, david and i went to hang out, and this is our adventure...
they picked me up in davids car, but mallory was driving. David said he's sick, so he cant move, and it hit him on the way here, and its because he ate, or something like that. so, i have to take some stuff to crystal at her friends house, and mallory takes it inside because david cant move and i am in the back seat, and then she takes FOREVER inside as david threatens to kill me with his seat... finally she comes out with a whole pizza, which was awesome because then we didnt have to buy food. we drive around and go to a grocery store to get some drinks, and david just gets a snickers bar and a bottle of pepto bismol. or, actually, bismuth, the store brand. so i sit in the front, and david is in the back with the pizza and we are looking for a place to go to eat it, but david is eating it in the back seat and drinking his bismuth and i thought he was sick, but still he was eating. we decide on the fun zone, and we get there, and its freezing, so i wear henry's sweatshirt that was in davids car. we come to find there are two pieces of pizza left, because david ate the whole damn thing, and since pizza petes was closed we couldnt get more free pizza, but, mal and i werent that hungry anyway. the only thing that is open is the arcade, so we go in there, and play a bit, but mal refuses to get us free tokens, so we dont spend that much money, and just as i think we are done, mallory gets some free tokens and a wasted three on the retarded dance dance revolution game that wont let me win. i swear i was doing to right and they said i was doing it wrong. and i sucked at pinball too. so, our token bank (aka mallory's pocket) is exausted, so we head home. we dropped off mallory first, and i borrowed rushmore and fargo from her, and david tried to steal some food, and then david and i left. i thought he was going to take me home, but we went by hollywood video because he wanted to rent some movies, and we spent 15 minutes there, and i was being a baby, and whining, because i was tired and wanted to go home. ordinarily i wouldnt have cared so much, but i didnt want to get yelled at because i called my mom an hour before that and said we were on our way home. so he gets some movies and takes me home and i watch rushmore, even though i was sooo tired i almost fell asleep like, 10 times. or more. i had to keep myself from blinking because when i did i would fall asleep. but it was a fatnatis movie, and i plan on watching fargo tonight. and i need to give mallory her cds back too. its nights like these that make me happy. impulse decisions, tons of fun, skeeball and free pizza. what more could a girl want?
what imlistening to: the bootylisious disk/ what im wearing: my flannel pajamas and a red tank top/ what im thinking: <im gonna go to david's house and play videogames...>
seven weeks of staying up allll night! ------ oh well. not really. kind of just one. coming up. i already know im going to study with david over break, but thats my only plan. we are going to get 5s on all our AP test and at least 1400s on our SATs. thats our goal.
my eyeballs hurt. let me see, today today, during math i did a computer assignment, physics we had a fun quiz and a guest speaker and tomorrow we are taking notes on Apollo 13. physics note. im laughing. haha, today during history, mr burke didnt show up for the first, like, ten minutes, and then he came with these drugged up gay men to talk to us about life. then in english we did absolutely nothing, except david and justin tried to ignore me, but im just too irristible. then i ended up giving justin money. im a sucka. lunch was cut short because i had to go take a math test and i took it and it wasnt that bad and i really hope i did well. because i think i did. then i went home and basically that all. read ch 28 in history and went to choir.
at choir, we sang this pretty song, and then this druid song, and then we got to sing lying on the floor on our backs. it was so cool. we sang two or three fun songs that we all know by heart and it was just fun. Yonder Come Day and Lord, Have Mercy. wonderful wonderful songs. tomorrow is maundy thursay, and then good friday, and the sadurday and then easter sunday. on sadurday i have to babysit, but that means money, yay.
david and i are working on a after school special for the 21st century, so look for that coming.
what im listening to: elliot smith on the bootylicious disk./ what im wearing: l.e.i. jeans and my argyle sweater/ what im thinking: <my eyes really are hurting.>
okay, so i havent updated in a while. but i have every good reason why. ive been terribly horribly no good very badly sick. from wednesday night to yesterday, i was bed ridden with fever and cough and cold and that type stuff. i wont go into details. but anyway, im back. i went to school today, and i successfully pushed back the math test i missed another day, so im taking it tomorrow during fifth. i think im okay, but everyone is saying its really really hard, so i dont know how ill do. i have a physics quiz tomorrow, and i have three days of assignments to make up, but i think ill do okay without making them all up yet, so ive only done one. i also have to make up a history test, which hopefully hell let me do thursday because i didnt have time to read it tonight. those things take hours of time. and money.
i helped my sister with her math and then we had some fun laughing. its was nice. i showed her the note justin wrote me today ("justin bradley is sexier than carrot top") and she goes "are you in love with this justin kid?" (i always ask her if shes in love with anyone she talks about) and i said yes, but as like a brother more than a lover. then she goes "is that the justin from la veta?" "yes" "the one you used to say was your cousin or something?" and then i remembered that we used to tell kids on the bus that we were brother and sister but we lived n different houses because he lived with our mom and i lived with our dad. and then crystal says "and you told people bill clinton was your uncle" and we did that too! ahhh.. goodtimes of lying. im going to have to remember to remind justin about all this.
i babysit on friday night. mo' money, less problems. i need to get shirley a birfday present and take malmal shopping or something for her (very late but much deserved) birfday present. i still need a job, and i think i aspire too high, and im going to go look into shoe storees at the mall and the block. id like the block better though, me thinks. i mean, i hate the block, but i like their shoes better. oh yes, i do. i should apply to some restaurants too. maybe johnny rebs. okay. i hope you didnt miss me TOO much, and i really dont know why im still doing this stupid thing because it lack content and readers.
what im wearing: green top and cherry pjs/ what im listening to: burn one down is in my head/ what im thinking: <"if you dont like my fire, then dont come around, cause im gonna burn one do-o-own, im gonna burn one, down.">
Im so discontented. i dont even know if that is a real word. I need something to do with my life. I need a job. i have nothing to do after school, during school, ever. I am going into a slump. I was thinking (last night, as i laid in bed, trying to fall asleep, which didnt occur until 2 hours after i started trying) about my life. I go to school and do the same thing every day. I dont even need to attend 4/5 of my classes because of the lack of content. i come home, and i do nothing. luckily i havent taken up eating as a way to waste my time. im actually losing weight, although i have stopped kickboxing because i feel dumb doing it when other people are in the house. but anyway... I am planning prom, but i wont have a date because all my guy friends either 1) have girlfriends 2) hate dances 3) have already gone to a dance with me 4) are potheads 5) are potheads with girlfriends who hate dances and have already gone to a dance with me or 6) have way better options for dates than myself. now, this goes for guys asking me to prom and me asking guys to sadies, but im more broken up and depressed about prom than sadies because i really want to go to prom, and i really want a boy to ask me, especially after what happened with prom last year (id rather not indulge into the details). i took a step toward employment and turned an app into barnes and noble today, but they said they hire according to experience and availablilty, and im plenty available, but not at all experienced. i can read, though, and um... i like books. i also got some applications, and im going to go to *shudder* the block tomorrow and get some more. i have so little life, and what i do have is so routine it drives me crazy insane. i want to meet new people, but that doesnt happen to girls like me. im too geeky. and unattractive.
i hate it when i get like this, when i feel all dependant upon other people in order to make myself feel better, and i feel as though other people arent around to make me feel better. its not like i want pity, its like i want a boyfriend. and i HATE wanting a boyfriend. more than anything, because it shows I have a weakness that I criticize in others. i am hypocrites.
what im listening to: the gurgle of my hungry stomach, but the old mother hubbard style the inside of my cupboards are taking on./ what im wearing: micah shirt, cherry pajamas/ what im thinking: <what i did today doesnt even matter.>
WELL, i STARTED to write a entry for yesterday, but my damn comouter froze up, so i stopped. yesterday is summed up in the next few words (in chronological order) : sleepy, dancing, hungry, bored, embarrassed, sleep, oops, singing, eating, talking, sleep. notice that sleep dominates. i will write the rest of today's tonight, because, today is only half over, my dear. and i think i want to go to deidrichs tonight, if anyone is available.
later... much, much later...
"cause waking up is hard to do-ooo" oh man, it was so hard to wake up this morning. school was normal, except stupit justin kicked me in the shin during english. my shins bruise so easily and it hurts so much. the bruises never ever go away. ever. so yeah... that. after school em and i went to in n out and got some free food, and then i went home, and ate some more. today i ate like a fatty. yogurt in the morning, cheeseburger and yogurt when i got home, and then a bunch of rice, corn yummy stuff and two carnitas tacos for dinner. yopliat, i must reiterate, is SO good. harvest cherry and french vanilla = my favorite. okay, enough about food. lets talk about sleep. i slept for three hours when i got home, and then i went and got my physics book from school where there was some crazy kids concert going on so it was a mad house trying to get out of there. and the sun was horrible in my eyes. i got home and chilled for a while until dinner. oh dinner was so good. my mom makes carnitas.... oh... mmm... so good... thats right, takeshi, this is all for me. haha, spirit week moment. okay, so then i did my physics, which makes me feel like ive accomplished something, because i have nothing to do anymore since water polo ended. i feel so lazy, but im so lazy i havent applied for a job yet. and whenever i talk about it, i feel even more lazy and useless. okay, so then i read, and ate more corn yummy, and now here. im going to go read some more, so, thats my entry for the day.
what im listening to: nothing./ what im wearing: white tank top, express jeans, unmatching socks/ what im thinking: "cotton rust is POtash Starvation!"
i have a cold. my nose hurts me, and now i am starting to feel sick all over, which i havent been feeling in the past few days, even though my nose has been hating me. i brought a box of tissues to julias house. my nose is all red like and im really self conscience. con-science. with science. or... against science. how can con mean with AND against? i just dont get it.
so, i woke up and i blew my nose, and i remember i was dreaming about taking showers... in big rooms... it was weird, because everyone was taking a shower together and it was like, okay, but we went into a room with huge windows for walls and we didnt want to take showers in there because someone might see us. anyway, i woke up at 9:30, surprisingly early for how tired i felt last night, and instead of taknig a shower DIRECTLY from bed, which is what i always do, i went into the living room and watched some TLC with me dad. i really like home improvement shows. i dont know why. so i watched tlc for a while, and then i took a shower. i got dressed and the next few hours are a blur.... more tlc, maybe i watched a movie? i dont remember, then my sister and i watched jeff corwin and man, hes funny, and we laughed together, which is all we do, EVER. then she fell asleep so i had no one to laugh with, so i went to read history, and i got sidetracked so i ate some... muffin? or... oh! i ate some fish and asparagus, and then i went and read some more history, and it seemed like i was reading forever, and i decided i couldnt finish, so i have to finish tomorrow. zoot suits were worn by mexican-american gangs during WWII. so cool to know. um... then i think i went online, and then i went to get an SAT book at barnes and noble (you know what bugs me? when people say "barnes and nobles" that bugs me.) and i need a job, and im a lazy buttface, and then i got home and i drank a bunch of water and went online some more and drank more water and ate dinner, and did the dishes and then i went to julias. ahh... a home away from home. a place to bring your tissues. nick and jake came over and we started watching a pretty funny movie, but we got sidetracked and then we went to deidrichs and that was a lot of fun. The guy performing played "maxwell's silver hammer" by the beatles, and it was cool. so we (I) tipped him. we stayed there until 10:30 and wet back to julias where we just talked for a while and i started feeling pretty ill so i came home. and now im here. and my journal has bnecome so UNINTERESTING, and im sorry. write me hate mail, and maybe ill have reason to change it. because, as of now, i write this for myself, to feel like i have a purpose, because my life is so meaningless right now. im so bored with everything. but at least i dont think its my fault anymore... im just in a bad situation at the moment, it has nothing to do with the quality of my persona. and thats a good feeling.
what im listening to: "bang bang maxwell's silver hammer" running through my head/ what im wearing: my NEW favorite PERFECT express jeans and mt white collared shirt and my sisters white pumas. i love pumas./ what im thinking: <i really hope i dont get really sick. im getting sleepy.... and i didnt do my kick boxing yet....>
today was pie, or... cake. except i think i screwed up majorly on a physics quiz, but the rest of the day was so easy. after school i took emily home, and we had shakes at carls jr and we had a grand ol' time. then i went home and lounged and mallory called and we talked on the phone, which is whacky, because we dont ever talk on the phone, and then mal, david and i went to hang out, and this is our adventure...
they picked me up in davids car, but mallory was driving. David said he's sick, so he cant move, and it hit him on the way here, and its because he ate, or something like that. so, i have to take some stuff to crystal at her friends house, and mallory takes it inside because david cant move and i am in the back seat, and then she takes FOREVER inside as david threatens to kill me with his seat... finally she comes out with a whole pizza, which was awesome because then we didnt have to buy food. we drive around and go to a grocery store to get some drinks, and david just gets a snickers bar and a bottle of pepto bismol. or, actually, bismuth, the store brand. so i sit in the front, and david is in the back with the pizza and we are looking for a place to go to eat it, but david is eating it in the back seat and drinking his bismuth and i thought he was sick, but still he was eating. we decide on the fun zone, and we get there, and its freezing, so i wear henry's sweatshirt that was in davids car. we come to find there are two pieces of pizza left, because david ate the whole damn thing, and since pizza petes was closed we couldnt get more free pizza, but, mal and i werent that hungry anyway. the only thing that is open is the arcade, so we go in there, and play a bit, but mal refuses to get us free tokens, so we dont spend that much money, and just as i think we are done, mallory gets some free tokens and a wasted three on the retarded dance dance revolution game that wont let me win. i swear i was doing to right and they said i was doing it wrong. and i sucked at pinball too. so, our token bank (aka mallory's pocket) is exausted, so we head home. we dropped off mallory first, and i borrowed rushmore and fargo from her, and david tried to steal some food, and then david and i left. i thought he was going to take me home, but we went by hollywood video because he wanted to rent some movies, and we spent 15 minutes there, and i was being a baby, and whining, because i was tired and wanted to go home. ordinarily i wouldnt have cared so much, but i didnt want to get yelled at because i called my mom an hour before that and said we were on our way home. so he gets some movies and takes me home and i watch rushmore, even though i was sooo tired i almost fell asleep like, 10 times. or more. i had to keep myself from blinking because when i did i would fall asleep. but it was a fatnatis movie, and i plan on watching fargo tonight. and i need to give mallory her cds back too. its nights like these that make me happy. impulse decisions, tons of fun, skeeball and free pizza. what more could a girl want?
what imlistening to: the bootylisious disk/ what im wearing: my flannel pajamas and a red tank top/ what im thinking: <im gonna go to david's house and play videogames...>
