Hey, remember when Vikings were cool? When kids came to school dressed as Vikings because they rule so much? When 96.5% of Americans were in the Viking fan club? NO! You don't! Vikings just don't get any credit. I'm talking about the norsemen, by the way, not the football team. The football team can blow me!

I got so much of a reaction on liking ninjas and oompa loompas that it's not even funny! Everybody thinks they're so cool! Nobody thinks Vikings are cool! Why the hell not? They had ships that looked like sea monsters, okay!? FUCKING SEA MONSTERS!! What's uncool about sea monsters? Nothing! This one time, I was swimming in the ocean when a sea monster came up to me and I was like 'Hi' and he was like 'greetings.' I asked, 'Who says greetings?' And he replied, 'Undoubtfully speaking, me!' So guess what I did! Yeah, it involves me kicking his ass because I rule so much! Anyways, back to the ships! Those things are pretty damn scary! I'll show you a picture, and if you don't start screaming like a baby girl about it, send me an e-slap at oompaloompa2172@hotmail.com for being a dumbass! Okay, here it goes... brace yourself!!

images.google.com/images?q=tbn:5IXe-T3vchoC:www.rosala-viking-centre.com/images/hogland2.JPG

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! PASSING OUT!!!

Okay, now that that's out of my system, back to the subject of vikings. Those things are pretty damn scary though, huh? Everbody thinks vikings use a Norse accent because their norsemen... haha boy are they wrong! It's because they're rebels! Everybody knows that when you hear a guy walking down the street using a norse accent, you better stay away or he'll beat the living shit out of you!! Ask Old Man Werenbaron... he'll tell you! Or I'll tell you! It'll be like Norse Legend Time! It'll be fun!

Old Man Warenbaron was walking down the street one day, spitting on every norse thing he could find. He got the norse stop sign, the norse sewer cover, the retarded norseman's scalp... just about everything. All of a sudden, the Old Man heard a voice. It spoke in a norse accent. It said 'Take this, bitch!' as a norseman flew down from the sky and dropped that bitch! It was SWEET! I was there, but I forgot my camera, sorry. Anyways, the point is, don't pick on norsemen.

Now, about the rumors that have been going around Dickinson for the last few years that I am, in fact, a Viking... well, alll I have to say is.. you caught me.

Now, this may very well be the reason that I rule so much! Well, part of it... keep in mind that I'm also a ninja and a superhero. The picture above lists a really good point though... am I viking... or a pimp?! I'd have to say both, judging by my sexy muscles and my viking helmet. I have a confession to make. The fact that I only have four fingers on one hand ISN'T the photographers fault! It was just hiding for the picture. I have five fingers I swear. I rule so much it's scary.

Next time somebody walks up and asks me why I rule so much, I finally have an answer ready... I'll reply, 'BECUASE I'M A VIKING!' I'm sorry, there's no viking fan club because vikings are underrated! Nobody else can be a viking, just me. HAHA! Sucks to not be able to be a viking. That's all for now, have a nice day.

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