The only way I could possibly be ANY cooler... is if I was an oompa loompa! That's because oompa loompas kick so much ass, it's almost impossible. But, they do have a few glitches... oh, wait. No they don't. Some people think that their songs are annyoing, but they're all wrong. If oompa loompas say it, it suddenly becomes right. An oompa loompa could rap to Shaq's whole CD, and it would suddenly become completely sweet. Can't you just picture one of these fatasses screaming out shit like 'Yo yo you wanna ride with the king extreme Shaq glim Shaq wrist just bling! ever since 15 big things ever since I spit 16 so if you wanna holla come and see me.' Man, Shaq is pretty cool too! I mean, he sucks at basketball, but if I had to pick one Genie in the whole world... actually, it would probably be the Aladdin one... but if I had to pick two, it would be him and Shaq.
Ok, back to oompa loompas! It's been brought to my attention that they're fat, and being fat isn't cool. Well, for those of you who are wondering, being fat is in fact very cool! 'Well,' you say, 'You can get a heart attack from being fat!' For those of you who said this, I must reply that you are a dumbass! Oompa loompas don't get heart attacks! Only people with no friends have heart attacks. Ha!! That means someday Eddie Munster's going to have a heart attack. I'm going to go to his funeral, spit on his corpse and laugh at him. Then, when I get kicked out of the funeral for doing that, I would make faces through the windows to make things worse. Making things worse kicks ass.
Haha what a homo. Eddie Munster would rule if he was an oompa loompa, though. Because oompa loompas rule. I would actually be cool if I was an oompa loompa... oh wait... I already am cooler than everybody else in the world. Except oompa loompas. They kick ass. A ninja oompa loompa would be the best thing ever. Now THAT would kick some major ass!! Now onto some club information for the ORL.
Okay, this is the coolest club ever. Here's what we do! We like oompa loompas! And guess what? If you read this and don't sign my guest book or e-mail me (tempy34@hotmail.com) and ask to join, I'll track you down and slit your throat! I've done it before... okay, no I haven't! But I could... no, I couldn't. You should join though because our club rules. We already have 5 members, and four of them are ninjas!! I'm... I'm the other one. Who cares though, I kick ass. And I kick the asses of people who diss us! Okay, get this!
I saw this dude walking down the street wearing one of those 'Oompa Loompas Blow' shirt. And he was listening to this CD, which had the Baha Men rapping or singing or whatever they do about how bad oompa loompas blow. I started bitching him out! I was just like 'Hey! I don't need this shit!' The what did I do?!! I'll tell you what! I... I whistled for my ninjas... so they could do my dirty work... because I'm not capable... but I would be capable if I was an oompa loompa!! DAMMIT! THEY RULE SO MUCH!
That's about all for now. Go back home. TO MY HOME PAGE!!! RARARARA!!!
