One day, I was sitting at school and we were having hot dogs. I hated hot dogs already, so I said out loud 'Damn! I hate hot dogs so much!' Next thing I know, the hot dog jumps up, flips me off, and starts cussing at me. It was the scariest thing ever!! This is exactly what he said:

The stupid thing flipped me off!!! What would you do? I'll tell you what I did!! I kicked it's ass right there. I started laying smackdowns and what-not... it was so cool. Of course, you probably know what happened. Somehow, my stupid principal didn't hear it cuss me out or see it flip me off, so I get a detention. It was stupid... but, in detention, I decided I would destroy the hot dog race no matter what...

The second I got out... well, not really the second. First, I went to track, went home, ate supper, watched South Park, harassed some helpless animals, beat up a few little kids, went to bed, woke up, went to school, turned into a pirate... well, you know what I meant. Pretty much the second I got out of detention, I went to the Mayor's office and told him hot dogs should be outlawed all the way throughout the town. Well, that goofy bastard tells me that there's nothing to be afraid of because hot dogs aren't alive. I tell him that they're not only alive, but they're pure evil! He just freaks out on me for saying that!! Well, that and a few 'Your momma's so fat jokes'... hehe.

Nobody will listen to me about hot dogs. I feel like Jesus. Hell, I practicully AM Jesus. I look almost exactly like him, for starts. I can perform miracles like him. And now nobody will listen to me like him. Now, I'd have to follow in his exact footsteps and start an underground society of people who hate hot dogs... Yeah, if you're reading this, pass on the word... wait, no, don't pass on the word. Just give my link to your friends... the main page link... so I get hits... he...he... Anyways, we need to put a stop to this hot dog shit. That's funny... it's the Hot God (me) verses the Hot Dog. (It's funny because God is Dog backwards.)

Anyways, I took my whole patrol of angry citizens (which was just me) to the farm, and I was gonna kick some donkey ass!! Then this farmer came out and told me hot dogs are made out of PIGS, not DONKEYS... so I kicked his ass, too, simply for making me look stupid.

Next, I went to the pig farm and massacred 403040500 pigs by myself. I was riding home in my pimped-up McClaren's when some cops pulled me over and told me it's a crime to kill pigs!! How was I supposed to know?!! I spent a year in prison, and now here I am again, with the following message...

Please people! I'm not forcing you (yet)!! When a fat cook offers you a hot dog, just say no! They are PURE EVIL!! Not to mention, they waste good ketchup and mustard, which could be used on something good like hamburgers... or goat meat. Yum, yum!

Hot dogs don't have to be eaten by the way. They can be used to drug up pipes... or as guitar picks... or fake fingers to make people think you have really fat fingers!! That's always really really funny! This one time... I... I... I've got nothing... it would be funny though.

That's about all I have to say on this one. Spread the word though... or just my main page address... but don't eat hot dogs either way.