LITERARY TRIVIA & CURIOSITIES
by Nirmaldasan

PATTERN PROSE

The  first  edition
of literary  trivia
&  curiosities  ap-
peared   in   December  2003.  A  second
enlarged edition is  arriving at port
online in February 2004 to plea-
se  myself  and  those   who
love such stuff. Anchor!

MILTONIC PROEM

I who erewhile Rocking Pegasus sung,
Still rocking and hoping to soar, now sing
Literary Trivia & Curiosities.
But the sequel goes ta-duk-ta, ta-duk!
The rocking horse is now a rocking chair.

TANKA

The clock has struck five,
The world is about to wake;
Crows caw in the skies,
A lizard clucks on the wall,
And 'Milk!' cries the old milkman.

ANSWERS TO RIDDLES IN ROCKING PEGASUS

1. I am smaller than a lock
But bigger than a pin.
Though you can put me in a box,
You can never lock me in.
     Because I am the KEY !

2. At night I am not the moon
And am not the sun at noon.
But I always have to lie
In the middle of the sKy.
     You now know I am K !

EMIR NUF

(Fun rime spelt in reverse is emir nuf, a new verse
 form that I have invented. The second line has
 two words linked by &. Reversing this line yields 
the first. The third and fourth lines rhyme with the
 first two. The rhyme scheme is either abab or abba.) 

Mit & mar,
Ram & Tim.
You can find them at the gym
Or surely at the bar.

Enaj & mailliw,
William & Jane.
Her cheeks are of rosy hue,
His full of lipstick stain.

Luap & retep,
Peter & Paul.
One watches every step;
The other, every gal.

NON-LINEAR VERSE

(Linear verse is read from first line to last. 
Non-linear verse -- my invention -- permits you to
 read the lines in any order. The following verse 
can be read in 120 ways.)

For ever and for ever,
In the wilderness sands,
On the banks of a river,
A banyan tree stands,
Like a sage in prayer.

THOUGHTS IN THE CLASSROOM
(with apologies to John Keats)

Much have I travelled in the realms of gold,
That latest Bond movie I have not seen;
Round many western islands have I been
There's no escape from this professor's hold.
Oft of one wide expanse had I been told
Where one can roam and rule as one's demesne;
Yet did I never breathe its pure serene
If only I can speak out loud and bold:
Then felt I like some watcher of the skies
And dreaming of damsels within my ken;
Or like stout Cortez when with eagle eyes
The professor stares at us -- and all we men
Looked at each other with a wild surmise --
His words go over our heads to Darien.

BABBLING MUSE

Taputi, din-din-doey,
Kapuka, tirra lirra,
O ri ri cadul gu lo!
What do these words mean?
Every babe will surely know.

SAIDAPET DOGGEREL

A pet said, "I am not your pet."
"I am not your pet," said a pet,
Said-a-pet, sai-da-pet,
SAIDAPET !

GRAFFITI

I came across some graffiti
Neither meant for you nor me.
But every line of it I read;
And this is what it said:
"The book is so small
To write about you all,
Give me a call
And I will tell about you all."

One more stanza there is;
And what it says is this:
"You may walk a mile,
Forget me in a while.
I am remembering you in my smile
What's about you in a while."

Though those lines are not so good,
The thought is easily understood.
And since the author is not known,
I have made those lines my own.

MNEMONIC

Jackie's peculiar face
Is difficult to trace.
Just think of a black pot of stew
With carrots sticking out, yahoo!

But Susie's telephone number
Is easy to remember. 
Two, three, five, seven, triple one, three -- 
The first six primes, O really!

BOUTS-RIMES
(With rhymes from Emerson's Brahma)

The leopard slays,
The lamb is slain;
And Nature's ways
Revolve again.

The hunters are near,
Each day's the same;
The king will appear
And hunt for fame.

Night and Death are out,
Fate will clip your wings;
And a song of doubt
The dying swan sings.

Hell is the dark abode
For those with sins seven.
But the meek and mild and good
Find a place in heaven.

TYPOGRAPHIC VERSE
(A typographic line has a visual identity. Whereas in
 metre 'the sound seems an echo to the sense', in this
 kind of free verse, the type seems a shadow to 
the sense.) 

Typo 
graphic 
verses

are lines
not sung
but drawn

lines drawn by
the chariot of Type
whose postures
reveal to the eye
shapes and furies
concealed to the ear.

When Ajax strives
Some rock's vast 
WEIGHT
to throw,
the Type too
LABOURS

and when
swift Camilla
scours the plain,
the chariot of Type
rolls-on-with-ease.

Or when 
some ship
laden with oil
springs a le-
ak
and
s
i
n
k
s
and 
the oil slick
s       p       r       e       a       d        s 

the Type seems
a  shadow
to the S e n s e.

DOUBTING THOMAS

        ? ... !

(This is an abstract poem that communicates without
 a word. The title alludes to the 
Christ-Thomas episode. The question-mark,
 ellipsis, and the exclamation-mark symbolise 
polar opposites in time. If a poem can be paraphrased, 
we can say Thomas moves on from doubt to conviction,
 from darkness to light, from sin to virtue ... )  

SQUARING THE CIRCLE
(a literary solution to a mathematical problem)

        C I R C L E
        C I R C L E
        C I R C L E
        C I R C L E

SLOGAN

Workers seldom speak. 
Others always squeak.

REVERSE RIMES
(words such as was/saw, evil/live, stun/nuts ... )

If I were a rich emir,
I'll learn to talk in rime.
And like radium I will emit
Verses to kill the time.

I'll go to the weekend mart
In the early morning tram.
And I will buy, if I may,
A kilogram of yam.

ECHO MEDIA

VOICE: The chief has ...
 ECHO: Chief ass!
VOICE: News sense.
 ECHO: Nuisance!
VOICE: He has Midas touch.
 ECHO: Ass touch! 
VOICE: Great brain he has.
 ECHO: Brain hee-haws!
VOICE: What if he comes along 'n' hears?
 ECHO: Long ears!
VOICE: He's assistant Times editor.
 ECHO: Ass is ten times better!
VOICE: That's slandering the boss!
 ECHO: That's slandering the ass!

HOW TO WRITE TROCHEES

Dumta dumta dumta dumta
Stress the dum, unstress the other,
Prowling leopards, roaring tigers,
Smiling babies, laughing Buddhas,
Dumta dumta dumta dumta
Dumta dumta lovely trochees!

TRANSLATING THE TRANSLATION

(On October 16 1992, I translated into Tamil a 
poem of William Butler Yeats titled 'He Wishes
 For The Cloths Of Heaven'. More than ten years later
 I am translating the translation back into
 English. Those familiar with the original can see
 the difference.)

Heaven's
bright bright clothes
moon-pearl star-gems
embedded golden clothes
were they mine
Love
I would have spread them
under your feet.
Alas! poor me
has only dreams.
For your flowery feet
I have spread them
by your side.
Slowly, slowly, walk along
for what your foot embraces
are my dreams ! 

(O boy! Robert Frost is right. A poem is surely 
lost in translation)

FRIENDLY EXPLETIVES
(a prose-poem)

A drunkard stumbled and fell. I lifted him up but 
he swore at me: "@@!!@**!**@". I forgave him because 
I knew he wasn't sober. Later I caught him in a sober 
state and asked for an explanation. He still swore
at me: "@@!!@**!**@". 

My God! Those were the very words he uttered when he 
was drunk. Now how can I forgive him? I was about to 
smash him in the face when his friend came along. I stepped
aside. They both went together to the bar. They laughed and 
cursed each other: "@@!!@**!**@". 

BLUES
1. I will shoot every dog in town 
who says I have the blues.
Said, will shoot every dog in town 
who says I have the blues.
Then there will be none, I suppose, 
to pursue the murder clues. 

2. I woke up one morning 
and found me under the cot.
Said, woke up one morning 
and found me under the cot.
Thanks to seven pegs of whisky 
and an overdose of pot.

3. Some ass has stolen my horses 
and I am left with none.
Said, some ass has stolen my horses 
and I am left with none.
My feet are tired on the highway, 
God save that son of a gun!

TONGUE TWISTER

Consonants in clusters twist the tongues

COMMUNITY POEM

wed was i i saw dew
Now live on, no evil won

(These are palindromic lines. Those who wish
 to add palindromic lines to this community poem 
may contact the author: nirmaldasan@hotmail.com )

EPITAPH FOR COMMENTATORS

Silent in the womb,
Silent in the tomb.

POET OF ENTERPRISE

We go upon a pilgrimage
To where the poet is laid to rest.
Upon life's enterprising stage,
Nissim Ezekiel gave his best.
To him in verse let's pay homage.

When, finally, we reached the place
We understood why we were there;
The trip had brightened every face.
His deeds were something great and rare.
Home he's gone, requiescat in pace.

INTERLUDE

Thomas Hood, author of 'Whims And Oddities', says
 that a gentleman cannot always be breathing his 
comic vein. Nirmaldasan completely agrees with
 him. So here and there this poet becomes serious. 
But you can always take him lightly.

THE BODHISATTA -- FIRST VERSION

I have been a dormant seed, seasoned by showers of spring.
 I have been a dancing reed with foot rooted in 
the soil.

I have been a caterpillar devouring the freshest
 leaves. I have been a butterfly fluttering 
embroidered wings.

I have been a chameleon changing colour from bark to
 bark. I have been a swift-winged kite hovering
 over a terrestrial prey.

I have been little prince Siddharth, nursing a 
crimson wing of a wounded swan.

Note: Composed on October 26, 1995. I later recast 
the lines in metre and added it to a collection
 titled Truth And Pleasure in Tinai 2. 

FIRST SURAH OF THE QURAN
(a paraphrase based on the translation of 
Marmaduke Pickthall)

Lord of the worlds, Allah, praise be to thee,
Thou God of beneficence and mercy!
Praise be to thee who owns the Judgment Day!
To thee alone we prostrate lie and pray;
To thee for aid we come on bended knee.
Shew to us the sole way that leads to thee,
The path of those who thy favours acquire,
And not of those who stray and earn thine ire.

AN ANCIENT MOSLEM PRAYER
(a paraphrase)

Almighty God, if I do thee worship
From fears of burning hell,
O therein let me dwell.
O Holy One, if I do thee worship
From hopes of paradise,
Let my hopes be vain sighs.
But O my Lord! if I do thee worship
With love expecting naught in return,
Hide not from me thy beauty eterne.

GOOD NIGHT

The rocking chair is rocking still
And I cannot cease to sing.
But it is night and we must sleep.
Good night! Good night!
But at dawn I will harp again
For I cannot cease to sing.
Good night! Good night!