Today, I was on the bus, on my way to meet Ronnie. Sharing
it with me were a group of children from kindergarten. It was a
rather big group, so it was a bit crowded. Right across from me
a little girl sat down and looked up.
That´s a nice thing with children. They haven´t learned to be
discrete, so they always look straight at you.
And the look was nice. Her eyes were of the icy blue kind, with
a black rim around the iris. You know, like touching an icecube
and realize that it warms you.
Snow fell from her hair, down on her nose,
where it melted,
and trickled down
onto her lips.
Hah.
She´s going to grow up into a
heart-breaker.
She didn´t smile though, but looked honest as she asked
"Do you want one?"
She offered me from the bouquet of twigs she held.
"Thank you. No." I said. "My hands are cold, and those are
snowy."
"Oh."
And we didn´t speak again.
But yet it made me.

Later on the subway station, I walk in circles around the
bench, around gentlemen smelling of after-shave and ladies with
flaming red hair that should be grey.
Around the foreign kids with striped sportspants.
Around the girl with the black hair and the mascara.
From black square to
black square.

Up until today,
I didn´t realize why the postal service chains their pencils to
their tables, but I do now,
as
I would have snatched, and
shoplifted
it
otherwise.
For I have no pencil yet. I have to write this mentally. And I
am.
For now,
I feel inspired.
I circle
and I forget
all of those
who love another.
Ignoring all of those
who love each other.
Today, now,
they don´t distract me, it is as if I´m floating in an eternal
post-orgasm.
So today, now,
no estrogen can match the electricity in my mind.
Today I´m in love with it, today
it´s all I need, all that
loveth me, all that
I love.
And no
touch, no
breath or saliva, no
eyes with lashes,
no tongue, no nailpolish,
no breasts or vagina
can match that.
Today my inspiration burns. Today my mind fuels itself.
Today I´m not out hang-gliding, or
kite-flying.
I´m not trying to catch up.
Today,
I´m staking out new ground in myself.
Today,
I´m Silver Surfing,
on top of myself all the time, riding,
and being carried.

That is inspiration, when
everybody is celebrity, everybody is linear, chequered and
three-dimensional,
when everybody is solid and detailed,
when everybody is translucent.

These are the moments I love, and the passion I search for.
For indeed, it is
when all
is splendid,
and all
is painted.

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