Sarah woke up and jumped up. She had to finish the dress to show her mother. She ran into the closet. All she needed to do was to sew ¼ more of the zipper on and she was officially done. She looked at the airline tickets that were on the desk. Her mother didn't know she was going and she was going to tell her today. She figured she would go to the mall today and look around. She wanted to get out and she decided not to start school until she came back. Yesterday she had run by the hospital and she cut a few of the top stitches on purpose to go and have them redone. She had them redone in a flesh colored.
She finished the zipper and smiled. She stood up and tried on the dress. It was perfect, absolutely perfect.
She put the dress on its hanger and walked downstairs. "MOM!" "YEAH!" "I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!" "THEN COME ON DOWN!" Sarah left the dress on the stairs and walked into the kitchen. Before her mother could ask her what she wanted to tell her she started talking. "Mom, before the Hanson's left to New York they wanted to know if I wanted to accompany them to the MTV Awards." Her mother laughed, "I don't think so, you have school starting in two days and you don't have anything to wear." She got a little impatient. "Mom, school can be put off a little more. And second what if I told you I already made my dress." Her mother stopped cleaning the over. She took off the yellow plastic gloves. "Excuse me? And where would you get a dress for free because I know you don't have any cash." She sighed and went and fetched the dress.
She walked back into the kitchen with the dress and her mother turned around to face her. "Please tell me that is not the dress that I think that is." Sarah turned red in shame. "I'm sorry mom, I would have told you sooner but I wanted to first have the dress so you couldn't use that for a reason against me going." Her mother didn't say anything she just stared at the dress. Sarah was getting a little anxious. "Mom, I'm sorry but look, I have the dress! I could go!" Her mother didn't say anything at first and then said, "Sarah, you are not going to New York. I want you to undo what you did to my dress and put it back in the attic. You are going back to school and this is going to end the conversation." She turned back around and Sarah stood there. "You can't do that, it's not fair." "I don't care what's fair, what's not fair is you stole from me and then didn't even bother to think how I would feel if you did this to something of mine." Tears started to pool in her eyes. "Mother, it's not fair. Please, after all the hell I've gone through please let me do something that I will enjoy." "Sarah, you can go next year. You still have to heal. After all you burst your stitches yesterday." Sarah wouldn't give her mother the satisfaction that she was aching to cry. She took a deep breath, "you can either give me a blessing in a sense for me to go, or I go whether you'd like me too or not." Her mother turned around and she could read the fury in her eyes. "You are not going to do any such thing. If you leave you will not be welcomed back. You are going to listen to me and do what I say. I am your mother, I cared for you and . . ." "What complete and total bullshit! Yes, you foot the hospital bills but you NEVER came to visit me in the hospital ever! You don't even give a damn about me! You could have least sent a card to the hospital so I knew that you gave a shit on holidays and my birthdays." Her mother looked wounded, "fine, go to New York." Sarah looked taken aback. "I'm sorry mom, I shouldn't have said that." "No, just go Sarah. Go away now, I have to finish cleaning." "Mom, I'm sorry, that was really mean." "Yes, but you meant it and I'm sorry you feel that way." She walked over to her mother and hugged her but her mother didn't respond back. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say what I did." "Yes you did." Sarah started crying, "I'm so sorry." "I know you are and I forgive you just go away now." And her mother turned away and finished cleaning the oven.
She walked up the stairs and into her bedroom. She felt hideous for saying those things to her mother. She had never spoken to anyone like that before. She knew it had hurt her mother and she never came to visit because she was always working to pay for the bills.
Her mother stopped and sat at a kitchen table stool. She started crying. She didn't know what to do. Sarah was right, her own daughter had been in the hospital in pain and dying and she never came to visit often in the least. She felt horrible but she also had been working trying to afford the hospital bills. She just sat there thinking of how she could make it up to her daughter.
Sarah dug around her room. Before she had been in the hospital she used to hide money around her room for emergency situations. Normally it ranged from needing money or candy or wanted a new shirt down at the mall. Lifting cushions and drawer hinges she trashed her room looking for money.
She stood up and counted about $37. She grinned and needed to find a way to the mall. But she figured better late then never and looked for the car keys. Then went back upstairs and found her old license. "Mom, I'm going to the mall to pick up some stuff. Do you want to come with me?" "No, I'll stay here, have fun and please be very careful." "I will, I promise. And I'm sorry mom for saying those things to you."
