Slipknot takes the "Give Us Your Puppy-Kittens" Tour out to Sedona, Arizona. Once again, that damneded Trak-Tour breaks down!!! Slipknot gotta walk in hot, hot sun, wearing hot black coveralls, and nobody brought their speedos!!! After the first few HOURS the guys start going all Norman Bates, being baked and all, and lose their fucking heads!!!!
Sid: Buzz.....buzz.....buzzz....I'm freeeeeeeee!!!! Buzz...buzzzz...buzzzzzzzz........
Sid sees some buzzards flying around, and, on a whim, Sid flys up and starts knocking the fuck out of the buzzards.
Sid: buzzz....buzz....buz.....this is fun!!!! buzz... buzzz...buzzz.....
Craig: Dude, Chris, bite that green thing!!!
Chris: Dude, okay, but you have to hug it!!!
Craig: Okay!!!
Chris goes over and takes a big bite out a cactus. Craig then wraps his arms around it in a big hug!
Craig: Ow, fuck mother fucker fuck, ow god damn!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Chris: Dude, your mom's fucking hot when she's naked, man!!!!
Chris runs over and begins humping a dead desert rabbit.
Chris: Dude, I'm fucking your mom!!! Your mom fucking wants me!!!! She's so fucking wet!!!!!
Suddenly, a buzzard flies down and bites Joey in the ass.
Joey: Ow!!! Fucking-asshole-prick!!!!
Mick runs over and clubs the buzzard. Just as Jim about to bury his size forty in the bird's ass, Corey dives over and hugs the bird.
Corey: NOOOOOOOO!!!!! DON'T HURT DENISE RICHARDS!!!!!
Jim: Dude, what the hell is with you?
Joey: Yeah!!! It fucking bit me!!! It might leave like marks and stuff on my sexy, tight ass!!!!
Nighttime
Paul puts down his Harry Potter book and says...
Paul: Snort, snort. Look, alamabobs!!!
Jim: Dude, you mean fucking aliens!!!
Paul: Yeah, that's it. Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Suddenly, a bright light fills the sky, and Slipknot find themselves on an alien ship.
Chris: Dude, me and your mom can just fuck for hours, dude!!!! She's fucking horny as hell!!!! And kinky too!!!!!
Alien dude Named Kavorshak: Meerp meep murf!!!
Sid: Buzzz...buzz....buzzzzz.z..z..whuht?...buzzz..buzzz..buzz....
Mick: Grrrrrrr....no.....anal....probe....for....meeeeee!!!!!
Corey: (still cradling buzzard like little kid with teddy bear) What did he say?
Joey: ANAL PROBE?!? OH, NO!!! MY MAKE-UP!!!!!
Mick runs over and clubs Kavorshak. Kavorshak go splat.
Mick: Grrrrrr...I....AM....KING!!!!!
Alien named Rentahs: OH NO!!! IT IS SATAN!!!! RUN!!!
Aliens hit button and send Slipknot back to desert!!! Mick is pissed!!!
Mick: GRRRRRRRRROOOOOOWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLSSSSSSWWWWOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mick grabs Corey, rips buzzard from him, and clubs the buzzard into oblivion!!!!!! Corey walks off...whining like Jon Davis.
Sedona is too hot. I wanna leave!