It has been one year since all contact was lost between Amanda, Nick, and Criss. No phone calls were ever sent, no letters were mailed, and no visits were made. Amanda's life was just a mess. She loved Nick with her life and could never forgive herself for what she did. She left him a letter, showing no sign of love. She left her best friend with a hug saying she'd be back, but never returned.
It was time she got her life straightened out. Chris helped her emotionally when she needed a shoulder to cry on but only Nick could let her forget her pain.
"I'm going to California." Amanda announced early one Saturday morning to her family.
"You're what?" her mother responded.
"I'm going to California to visit some people."
"And how are you going to get there?"
"I'm driving there and staying at a hotel for a week. It's already booked and I'm not backing out of this. I leave in 2 days."
"Well, you're old enough to do this. I can't say no."
"I'm going to Chris's. I'll be back later."
Amanda walked down the street to see her best friend since childhood. He didn't know she was leaving for California in 2 days. He didn't know she would go back there at all after what happened.
She knocked on the door. Chris opened the door with a smile.
"Good morning." he said.
"Hey." Amanda went inside and followed Chris up to his room.
"So, whatz up?" he asked warmly.
"I'm going to Cali in 2 days to see Nick." she said bluntly.
Chris looked at her silently. He was shocked to hear she was going.
"Chris..?"
"I'm just sort of shocked. I mean, it has been a year Amanda. And you're just going back now? After no contact with Nick or Criss?"
"You don't know how hard this is on me. I left so abruptly Chris. I left Nick with a letter!!!!" Amanda voiced with a sadness in her voice.
"Life has been so hard since I left. I never called him, never visited him. I showed no sign that I still cared. I need to fix what I broke." she continued.
"Mandy, things are going to be different when you get there. Things change over a course of a year. I'm sure Nick is dating again or has a girlfriend. He probably moved on, just like you should've. "
"How am I supposed to move on when I left someone I loved so much!?"
By now tears rolled down her face. Chris hugged her to give her come comfort, but knowing that she would be in pain until she went to see Nick and make things right again.
Amanda stayed with Chris for the day. They went out for pizza at lunch time, rented some comedy movies so it wouldn't depress Amanda. She walked back home around 8 o'clock, where hardly any light shown on the street. She entered her house and went straight up to her room. Grabbing the suitcase shoved under her bed, she began to throw in some clothes. She zipped it up after packing it to the max and slipped it back under her bed. Amanda sat down on her bed and opened the nightstand drawer to her left. She dug through it until she found a green box. She pulled it out and set it on her bed. Closing her eyes she slowly opened the lid. She opened her eyes again to reveal what was enclosed in the box. Amanda pulled a frame and examined it. It was cracked down the middle but the picture was still visible.
Tears streamed down her face as she seen the familiar blonde she left behind a year ago. The picture was the one she threw on the floor the day Nick kissed Megan. She kept it since it was the only picture of her and Nick together. It was taken on a bright day in Nick's backyard. She still remembers Criss taking that photo.
Still rummaging through the box, she pulled out more items that reminded her of her life in California. There was movie stub tickets for the movies Nick took her too and the ones with Criss, dried flowers Nick had given her, and probably the one with the most memory was a bracelet that had Nick and her name on it. She had it made before she left. No one but her knew it existed. She carefully put all of the valuables back into the box, leaving the frame for last. She held it close to her heart before putting it away with the rest of the things.
Amanda went to bed early that night. She spent Sunday saying bye to some friends, leaving Chris for last.
"See ya in a week buddy." she said care free.
"Yeah, just don't get hurt Mandy. I can't stand to see you hurting."
"I won't. I'm going back to get things right again."
Chris gave her a warm friendly smile and gave her one last hug before she went back home.
"Bye" she yelled down the street. She seen Chris give her a wave before entering her house. She had dinner with her family and said her byes since she would be leaving super early in the morning. Sleep was something she didn't get that night. Most of the night was spent with tossing and turning thinking of what was to come.
Early Monday morning, around 4 A.M. she packed her car, grabbed her purse and was off. She seen maybe one or two cars during the first 3 hours of her trip. It was a 13 hour trip to California. She drove for 6 hours before stopping for something to eat and a bathroom break. Then she continued her last 7 hours. It was after 5 by time she reached the sign, 'Welcome to California'. She drove to the hotel she was staying at right inside of L.A., about 20 minutes from Criss and about a half an hour from Nick's.
She pulled into the Holiday Inn parking lot and found a spot close enough to the doors as she could. Amanda grabbed her suitcase and purse and went inside. At the desk she got the key to her room which was on the 4th floor. Amanda threw her stuff on the bed and collapsed with it. She was ready for all action that would take place tomorrow. All the pain and emotions would go through the roof, but she decided she could take it. She had to be strong in front of Nick and Criss. What she didn't know is that she would have to be stronger to face the events to come.
