(Author's Rantings)------------------------------------------- Finally! In this story I got around to explaining a little about Delet! Well... hehehe, on second thought, maybe I didn't! ^_~ (Beginning of Story)------------------------------------------ Episode Thirteen: Folklore for Dummies (The show opens on our heroes in the woods. Sorta' campy [no, not THAT kind of campy] setting, you know, the sleeping bags, extra clothes, and all that other stuff that the gang tends to have hanging around when it gets dark. So ob- viously, it's about late-afternoon or so, and everyone's setting up camp. Brock is trying desperately to start a campfire.) Narrator: Yo'! S'up, homeys? Word! We just chillin' h... Brock: (Interrupts him.) Hey, Mr. Narrator! We told you before that style just doesn't work... Jessie: (Winces.) Ew! It's not you at ALL! James: (In his goofy voice.) It's tacky! > <; Narrator: Okay, okay. Well, anyway... Jessie, Teem, Meowth, and James were fired from Team Rocket and have joined Ash and his friends. And it looks like they're already forming some close friendships. Meowth: Well, all except for Ash an' Jessie... (He motions over to them.) Ash: (Very perturbed.) Jessie! Keep your nasty ol' Team Rocket uniforms off my stuff!!! > <; Jessie: (Equally enraged.) For your information, Ash, that uniform is one of the most highly acclaimed outfits in animé fashion circles! Which is more than I can say for your ap- palling outfit! Not only that, but I designed this specific version of it myself! James: (Whining defensively.) Hey! I helped! Jessie: Hmm? Oh, yes, Jamzie helped too... a little... - -; Ash: I don't care! I think it's dumb! Besides, you aren't in Team Rocket anymore anyway! Jessie: Well? That's the only clothes I have with me! What do you want me to do? Walk around naked? Brock, James, and Teem: (They all look up for a second, then look at each other and blush a deep shade of red.) Ehhhh... heheheh... =^_^;= (Laughing nervously.) Meowth: See what I mean? Narrator: Eh, yeah... Well, anyway, I'll let you guys do what- ever it is you want, I'm gonna' try to come up with a new narrating idiom. Meowth: Okay, whateva' (He shrugs.) (Misty walks up to the group with Delet, Pikachu, and all the other pokémon that aren't in pokéballs. They've all ap- parently just gotten back from a swim. Misty has her hair down, without the one funky sprout of hair going up like she usually has.) Misty: (Smiling as she is completely unaware of the chaos at the "homebase.") Nothing like a good swim in the pond, right girls? Delet: Delet! Del Del! ^_^ Pikachu: CHU! KACHU! {I'm a boy, Misty! A BOY!} Misty: Oh, sorry, hehe ^_^; I tend to forget, what with your voice and all! What about you, Arbok? Arbok: Chaaaa... boookha? {I... don't really remember, ask Jessie.} Delet: Delet? Del del del? {You don't know if you're a girl or a boy?} Arbok: Bokkhaaaa... {It's hard to tell with snakes.} Misty: That's weird... Oh, and I forgot you too, Psyduck! You're not a girl! Hehe... =^_^;= Psyduck: @_@ Psy? Psyduck? {What? Snake? Huh?) Ash: (Looks up from his dispute with the other female human of the group.) ::blinkblink:: Oh, hey, Misty. Brock: Hey, Misty. Teem and Meowth: Hiya! (They wave.) Ash: You know what? Your hair looks good down like that... (Everyone gives him a look.) Ash: What? I'm just saying it looks good. Misty: Uh... thanks, Ash... - O Pikachu: (Taunting sing-song voice.) Pika, pika chuuuuuu!!! {Someone's got a cruuuuuush!!!} (He points teasingly at Ash.) Ash: No I don't! I'm just saying her hair looks better that way! That pigtail thing she usually has looks doofy. Teem and James: (They look at each other, then at Misty.) He has a point. Misty: (Her face turns red and she grows fangs.) I'll show you clowns doofy!!! > <; (She chases them all around, throwing punches left and right.) Teem: OW!!! James: OOH!!! Ash: CUT IT OUT!!! (Meowth, Brock, Jessie, Pikachu, Delet, and Arbok all look at each other, sigh, and get those little sweatdrop things. Psyduck simply replies...) Psyduck: Psyduck? Jessie: Arbok, be a dear and put a stop to that, would you? Arbok: Chaabokh! (He, uh... she... uh... Arbok nods and rushes off to stop them.) Brock: (He turns to Jessie.) PLEEEZE would you go on a date with me, Jessie? Please? Jessie: (Shakes her head.) Sorry, Brock. James and I are too close. Brock: (Sigh.) Okay... - -; (He goes back to his fire, mut- tering. Meanwhile, Arbok wraps up Teem, Ash, Misty, and James and drags them back to Jessie.) Jessie: Thank you, Arbok! ^_^ Wanna' take a rest now? (She holds up a pokéball. Arbok nods happily and hops in, drop- ping the fighters to the ground. Misty punches Ash one more time for good measure.) Ash: OW! (A little later, it has become darker and the campfire is set. Most everyone is retiring to bed. Ash quickly puts a rubber snake in Misty's sleeping bag and gets attacked by Misty. Delet curls up in one of Teem's vests, and various other shenanigans ensue.) James: (Puts his things by Jessie's.) I'm sleeping with Jessie! Jessie: I've got James! (She puts all of her items with his.) Meowth: Whoa! Hey, you two! You wanna' wait an' get married first? (Sweatdrop.) Jessie: We meant in OPPOSITE sleeping bags, dummy! (She konks him on the noggin with a big ol' animé mallet.) Meowth: Meeeowwwwwwth! > <; (Rubs his head.) Teem: Awww... stinkburgers. Do we really gotta' go to bed now? Brock: What do you mean, Teem? Teem: I wanted to stay up late and share stories and legends and embarrassing secrets! (He squeals like a girl.) Ash: (Looks angry.) Ohhh... that sounds stupid! James: (He gets his lovable goofy voice.) I dunno! It sounds like fun! ^_^ Misty: Yeah! Pikachu: Pika! {Yeah!} ^_^ Brock: (He shrugs.) Okay, uh... Teem: OOH!!! (He picks up Delet.) Tell me about Delet, guys! C'mon! Tell me the Legend!!! Ash: (He perks up.) Yeah! I wanna' hear about that! Brock: Oh, okay, well it's like this... Delets existed a long, long time ago... Teem: In a galaxy far, far away? (Delet giggles.) Brock: No, like when knights and dragons were around... Misty: Wait! I thought it was a pokémon god... Jessie: You're both wrong! It was a genetics experiment! Brock: (Thinks a bit.) No, I'm pretty sure it was medieval times... Jessie: (Angrily.) Are you saying I don't know my legends? Brock: I didn't say that! (Defensively.) Ash and Teem: Oh, brother... (They roll their eyes.) Meowth: You'a all wrong! I'm a pokémon, so I obviously know da' real legend! Delets came from outa' space, like da' Mew. And d'ey was da' strongest pokémon in da' univoise! But when d'ey came ta' Eoith (Earth), most of 'em couldn't live d'ere, 'cause d'ey wasn't used ta' it! James: I was told that the principal of Pokémon Tech had a secret kingdom of delets that lived under the secret halls of the school... Jessie: No, James, dear, it was gnomes, and he knew a family of them who stole all those things from our lockers all the time. James: Oh, yeah. Teem: ::blinkblink:: Ash: Is there a consistant Delet Legend? Teem: I guess not. (Delet and Pikachu shrug.) Misty: Well, anyway, the Legend says that delets were really rare. Brock: Yeah, and strong. Jessie: And beautiful! Delet: Dellll.... delet let... {Aww... you're too kind...} =^_^= Teem: Well, I know a legend... a SCARY one!!!! It's a tra- ditional American ghost story! Delet: Let del! {OOH! Tell us!!!} Ash: The truthful politician! HAHA!!! Meowth: Da' well-written sitcom! HAHA!!! Teem: (Rolls his eyes.) No, this one's really scary, just listen, okay? (They all giggle.) All: Okay. Teem: Okay... (He gets an evil look in his eye.) There once was this guy working at WalMart named Kernan Leipowitz... Jessie: Yawn... Oh, it's sooo scary. (Hugs James drama- tically.) Help me, James, I'm soooo scared! Teem: (Yells.) I'm getting to the scary stuff!!! > <; (He gets creepy again, well, creepier than usual at least.) One day, Kernie, as he was called, was working late... doing some in- ventory checking, when he decided to get an Icee. He was gettin' kinda' thirsty and everything... Well, he drank it REALLLLY fast and got a brain freeze! Ash: Yeah, just like I'm getting now... Zzzzz... (Everyone giggles.) Teem: (Yells again.) Gimee time here!!! > <; He drank it really, REALLY fast. So fast... his HEAD EXPLODED!!!! (Everyone gasps. Teem grins satanically.) Creepy, huh? Any way, years later, another young employee was working late... when a tall, spectral figure with a happy-face button for a head leaped out at him and HACKED MADLY AT HIM WITH A RUSTY BLUE CHAINSAW!!!! (Everyone has faces both of fearful dis- gust, yet slightly amused criticism.) Gore flying every- where! It was disgusting, I mean-- Brock: Where'd he get the button-head? Teem: Don't interrupt. After his bloody act, Kernie rushed off to the woods nearby, where a boyscout troop----(Hours later.)----And next to the horribly mangled courpses, they found a rusty blue chainsaw... Some say that the spirit of Kernie the Face still wanders through forests, looking for young lovers (He looks evilly at Jessie and James and drools for dramatic effect.), seeking revenge for his lost love by destroying them and all the ones they know closely. (He laughs demonically. Jessie and James are whimpering and hugging each other. Brock is pale, Misty and Ash are hiding in their sleeping bags, and all the pokémon are huddled together.) Meowth: D-d-dat's not a real story, is it? Teem: Nah, it's the plot to this long series of slasher movies in America... Pikachu: Ka?!? Delet: Let del!?! Misty: Then what's the big idea scaring us like that? > <; Teem: Hehehe... because it was funny. Jessie: (Glares at him.) You think scaring us is funny? I'll give you funny, you little blue freak! Teem: Whu-oh! O o; (They all leap on Teem.) OW OW OW YEOW OW OW! Oh, holy mother of pearl in a sidecar goin' 80 with chocolate jimmies and a lobster bib! STOP!!! (Suddenly, a dark figure looms over them. Meowth looks up at it with a disgruntled expression.) Meowth: (Rudely.) Yeah, whaddaya' wa---wa----wa---HO BOY! O o; (He whimpers.) James: Meowth, what are you whimpering about? Meowth: Look up, you guys... (Everyone looks up and sees the figure of Kernie the Face, looming over them with his sadistic grin.) Everyone: ::blinkblink:: AAAAAAAAAAAUGGGGK!!!! (They all dash madly through the woods with Kernie in hot pursuit.) Misty: I thought... (huff) you said... (puff) Kernie was fake... (gasp) Teem... Teem: Hey, how was I to know it was based on a true story? James: Oh, like... (gasp) the Blair... (huff) Witch Project? Teem: Sorta... - -; To Be Continued...