May I have your attention please?
Will the real Mean Mike please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Mean Mike please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here..
[Mean Mike]
Y'all act like you never seen a jobber before
Jaws all on the floor like Mean Mike actually scored with that 20 cent whore
and he started lookin real wierd cuz it never happened before
This is his first time, dont be so mean (Ahh!)
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,
he didn't just screw who i think he did, did he?"
And The American Hero said... nothing you idiots!
The American Hero's dead, he's locked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)
Homosexual men love Mean Mike {*vocal turntable: chigga chigga chigga*}
"Mean Mike, I'm sick of him Look at him, walkin around grabbin his...wait he has nothin to grab,"
"Yeah, but he's so smelly though!"
Yeah, he probably got a couple of screws last month
But its no worse, than what's goin on in Ozz's bathroom Sometimes, Ozz just wants get on TV and just let loose, but can't
but it's cool for Onslaught to hump a dead moose
"My gun is to your head, my gun is to your head" And if your lucky, i might not declare you dead
And that's the message that Ozz delivers to his kids
And he expects them not to know what excactly Mean Mike is
Of course they gonna know what homnosexuality is
By the time they hit third grade
They got the BCW live don't they?
"We ain't nothing but mammals.." Well, some of us who are liek Hannibal
who cut other people open like cantaloupes {*SLURP*}
But if Miek can hump dead mamals and suck camels
then there's no reason that a man and another Mike can't elope {*EWWW!*}
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Mike,put on your panty hose and sing the chorus and it goes
Chorus:I'm Mean Mike, yes I'm the real Mike
All you other jobbers are just imitating
So won't the real Mean Mike please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?
[Mean Mike]
Positively Rick don't gotta bring weapons to his matchs;
well Mike duz, nuff said
You think I give a damn about the World Title?
Half of you othe rjobbers cant even hit my stomach let alone spank me
"But MIke, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
"Hell yes!"
So you can, sit me there next to Jimmy Z?
Shit, Y2C better switch me chairs
so I can sit next to Matt Extreme and Mega Phat
and hear 'em argue over who he gave head to first
Your bitch ass never beat me, all you ever did was shit and pee
"Yeah, he's a tough gu...wait i gotta see"
I should download his Erotic night sessions on mp3
and show the whole world how you gave Reeshi VD {*AHHH!*}
I'm sick of you little girl and boy champs, all you do is annoy me
so I have been sent here to lose to you {*bzzzt*}
And there's a million of us just like me
who lose like me; who just don't win like me who suck like me; blow, talk and fuck like me
and just might be the next best thing but not quite me!
I'm Mean Mike, yes I'm the real Mike
All you other jobbers are just imitating
So won't the real Mean Mike please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?
[Mean Mike]
I'm like a head trip to listen to
cuz all you do is joke about me messin up the
powerslam in your livin room
The only difference is I got no balls and take it
And all i am is talk and i always sugarcoat it for all
I just get on the mic and suck it
and whether you like to admit it {*ERR*} I just cant cut a decent promo
worse than 99% of you e-fedders out there
Then you wonder how can kids sit in front of a tivo to watch me
It's funny; cause at the rate I'm goin when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person sittin on the corner
Pinchin nurses asses when i realize they were actually 90
And I'm jerkin but these 6 bags of Viagra seem to be fightin me
And every single person is a Mean Mike lurkin
He could be workin at Auto Zone, messin around with his bone
{*HACH*} Or in the parkin circlin,
Screaming "I couldn't get a fuck!"
with his windows down and his generic system up
So, will the real Mike please stand up?
And stick 3 of those fingers on each hand up..?
And be proud to be outta your job and outta your hoe
and one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
I'm Mean Mike, yes I'm the real Mike
All you other jobbers are just imitating
So won't the real Mean Mike please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?
I'm Mean Mike, yes I'm the real Mike
All you other jobbers are just imitating
So won't the real Mean Mike please stand up,
please stand up, please stand up?
[Mean Mike]
Ha ha
Guess there not a Mean Mike in all of us
Fuck it, let's not stand up
