Boyz!
Waking up to a world full of delight one would say. But not I, I wouldn't believe that delight is the right word to use in a situation of turmoil. Most people assume being gay is about sleeping with your best friend, who also happens to be gay, and sleeping with his best friend, who is also gay. In real life, however, sex only drives the man with the small penis. You know, the one you make fun of that always is playing with himself and being sexual towards anything that looks his way. Well guess what? I have only met a few of those people, and the ones I have met like that I have kept my distance from. The real world instead has created a dramatic scene surrounding the gay world that seems to the most part to be true. Since I have come out my life has been a soap opera. The joke is, it should be scripted and titled Gays of Our Lives and should be airing this fall on pridetv. However I'm sure every other gay person in the world lives the same dramatic existence and the only people that would watch would be the straight folks so they could have a small glimpse into the world of gayness. I ask myself the question, is it possible for a gay person to live a less dramatic life and still be in the scene? This is what I have been attempting to accomplish since my adventurous leap into the gay world this past November. Can reality be this complicated that I have to be stressed all the time wondering who is talking behind my back and wondering what I have said about this person today? If I do not say something about a certain topic, it does not matter, someone will make a story up for me. So should I just say nothing at all and be the biggest gossip in the gay scene? Or do I say everything on my mind and then have my words twisted in several directions until they form nasty comments about everyone I have ever met? To me it seems like a no win situation. An endless, vicious circle that has no end, but a rollercoaster of a ride. Can being gay be this difficult? If so, I now have realized why most stay in the closet! And one more question, can I get back in?
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