Men Are Such Babies!



Logan is as badass as they come. But is that necessarily true when Marie is carrying his kids? (Set in the "Echoes That Start" Universe)

Rated R


Now, don’t get me wrong, Ah love Logan to pieces. That man is a walkin’, talkin’ sexual fantasy who just so happens t’ be head over heals in love with me. In mah whole life, Ah’ve never been able t’ brag ‘bout somethin’ like this, but Ah can now.

Logan is mine.

For any o’ ya that don’t believe me, let me give ya a little visual o’ what’s goin’ on right now.

We’re in our bedroom-- yeah, we share a room --in bed. Ah learned t’ control mah powers a couple months ago so there’s not a stitch on me. There’s not a stitch on Logan, either. We’re both naked as the day we were born an’ Logan’s currently pressin’ little kisses all over me with the occasional open-mouthed one. Lately he like t’ focus on mah stomach. He could spend hours just kissin’ mah stomach if Ah’d let him.

Have Ah mentioned the fact that Ah’m pregnant?

That’s right, Ah’m gonna be the mother o’ Logan’s child. This is somethin’ Ah’ve dreamed ‘bout mah whole life. For a while, though, Ah didn’t think that Ah’d ever get t’ have kids. What man would want a woman he couldn’t touch? ‘Course then Logan comes along an’ all mah plans get changed. We fall head over heals in love fer each other, get married then a couple days later find out that Ah can touch him.

Personally, Ah think that Logan’s more excited ‘bout the fact that he’s gonna be a daddy than the fact that he can touch me now. He gets this big sappy grin on his face an’ just rests his hand on mah stomach. An’ every night ‘fore we go t’ bed, Logan kisses mah stomach an’ says g’night t’ the baby.

Ah know that yer laughin’ right now, but it’s the truth. Logan really is a softy. There’s no way in hell that he’d ever let anyone but me see this side o’ him, but it’s there. Ah’ve threatened t’ hide a video camera in our room an’ tape Logan bein’ all nice an’ sweet just so Jubes and Kitty’ll believe me. Hell, if Ah were them, Ah don’t think Ah’d believe me either.

Sweet bleedin’ Christ! When did Logan get down there?!

Good Lord that man has a talented tongue! It’s just so-- Oh Gawd! Yeah, sugah, just like that! --just so un-fuckin-believeable! Don’t even think ‘bout teasin’ me, Logan, or Ah’ll rip yer balls off! That’s-- LOGAN! Logan, please! Please! Ah feel like Ah’m ‘bout t’ fall apart at any-- PLEASE! OH GAWD!! LOGAN!!

Shit, shit, shit. Holy fuckin’ shit! That was amazin’!

Damn, now Ah’ve lost mah train o’ thought.... Right! Logan bein’ a softy.

It’s true. The guy’s a fuckin’ baby. Sure he like t’ act all tough an’ macho on the outside, but get him alone an’ he’s like a big teddy bear. Cuddlin’ with Logan is almost better than havin’ sex.... Not that Ah’d give up havin’ sex with Logan. But just feelin’ those arms wrapped ‘round ya after a hard day. The way he holds ya, the way he kisses the top o’ yer head and nuzzles against the side o’ yer face, the way his chest rumbles when he starts purrin’.... Granted, he only does this with me-- or at least he better if he wants t’ remain completely intact --but it’s still one o’ the best feelin’s in the world.

Y’know, Ah think Logan’s spendin’ so much time focusin’ on mah stomach cause he knows that it won’t be so small fer a very long time. Accordin’ t’ Jeanie, Ah’ll start gettin’ fat in a couple o’ weeks. Ah don’t wanna get fat, but there’s no avoidin’ it when yer pregnant... or when ya have a husband that feeds ya as much as Logan feeds me.

An’ it’s not like Ah can say no t’ him. Every time Ah try he gets this wounded look on his face. Like Ah just punched him in the gut or told him that hockey sucks. So Ah eat the snacks that Logan brings fer me without complaint.

‘Course, when he brings me strawberries or any other finger foods, Ah can’t help but feed him some. An’ Ah know that he can’t help it when he accidentally brushes his lips or tongue across mah fingers. See ‘cause Ah’ve just got these real long fingers and Logan’s got this real big mouth.... It’s bound to happen every once in a while. An’ o’ course, Ah can’t let him go walkin’ round with little smears o’ food on his face so Ah hafta lick off any access food that winds up on ‘round his mouth.

I am sorry to interrupt your night, but I need Logan in the map room.

Grrrrr.... Leave it t’ Chuck t’ interrupt the nice, quiet night Logan an’ Ah were havin’. Logan doesn’t look very pleased, not that Ah can blame him. Ah’m right pissed mahself. But, that’s what happens when yer a superhero. Ya don’t necessarily get a night off.

Be careful, sugah. Ah’ll be waitin’ right here when ya get home.

Yeah, Ah’ll be wearin’ exactly what Ah’m wearin’ right now.

Ah just promised.

Logan, quit bein’ such a baby. Ah’ll be fine. Ah’ll prob’ly just go have a nice long bath an’ read one o’ those pregnancy books ya bought me.

No, the one with the picture o’ the unborn baby on the front. Ah read that one last time ya had to go on a mission.

Ah love ya too, sugah.

Always.

Ah hate it when Logan has t’ go out on a mission. It means that Ah hafta stay behind, waitin’ t’ find out whether he’s all right or not. ‘Course, in the end, Logan always ends up bein’ all right, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get hurt. More often than not, Logan comes back from a mission lookin’ beat as hell an’ half dead. Since he’s the one that’s least likely t’ die, Logan’s decided that it means he has t’ be the one takin’ all the risks. Ah hate it when he does things like that, but Ah know that he wouldn’t be Logan if he didn’t do that.

Logan’s heart is as big as they come. He just doesn’t always know how t’ let it show. Logan’s been hurt a lot in his life, so he’s not the most trustin’ person. T’ this day Ah don’t think he completely trusts everyone at the mansion. He’s always waitin’ fer the other shoe t’ drop. It hasn’t yet an’ Ah keep tryin’ t’ tell him that it won’t. We’re a family. Everyone at the mansion is part o’ one big family.

Okay. Somethin’ bad’s happened. Ah can feel it in the pit o’ mah stomach. Somethin’ happened t’ Logan.

Professor, what’s goin’ on?

Magneto has escaped from his cell and is now on the loose in the prison.

WHAT?! How on earth could ya let Logan go? Magneto could bend Logan ‘round like a pretzel if he wanted t’! Logan could be seriously hurt!

Logan is a member of the team. He knew the consequences going in.

An’ it didn’t even occur t’ ya that Logan would go whether he was in danger or not? Damn it, Professor, Ah thought ya knew Logan better than that! Logan’s like one o’ those kamikaze guys that purposely crash their planes! He doesn’t care what happens t’ himself as long as everyone else is all right!

I am quite certain that Logan will be all right.

He’d better be or ya’ll have one pissed off pregnant woman ready t’ go medieval on yer ass! Ah don’t want Logan t’ get hurt!

Those next few hours seemed t’ take ferever. Ah was goin’ outta mah mind worryin’ ‘bout Logan. Ah didn’t think that he was dead. Or even hurt real bad. Ah’d have felt it if he was, wouldn’t Ah? Ah’d like t’ think that Ah would, but Ah’m not sure. Logan an’ Ah have a pretty strong connection, but Ah’m not sure that it’s that strong. Ah’m sure that the only reason Ah feel sick t’ mah stomach is cause it’s nearly four in the mornin’ which means that mah mornin’ sickness is gonna start up in a couple o’ hours. That’s it. Mornin’ sickness.

Then why is mah heart havin’ such a hard time beatin’?

The jet!! The jet’s back!

Logan’s back!

Ah’ve gotta get down there! Make sure that Logan’s all right! Ah know Ah said that Ah’d be waitin’ up here wearin’ nothin’ but a smile, but Logan’ll just hafta fergive me. Ah can’t stay up here another minute. Sweat pants, sweat shirt, wool socks. Check. Check. Check. All right, Ah’m ready t’ go. It gets awful cold down in those lower levels an’ Logan’d have a cow if he saw me down there wearin’ only shorts and a tank top. It’s not like Ah’m gonna look good wearin’ those skimpy tanks fer much longer. Gotta take advantage of it while Ah can.

Damn it! Has the elevator always been this slow? If Ah ever wanted t’ know what slow torture was like, Ah think Ah know now. Somethin’s wrong. Ah can feel it.... Ah just don’t know what it is.

Please don’t let it be Logan. He’s gotta be all right. Ah’ll kill him if he’s not all right!

He’s all right!

Gawd damn it, Logan! Ah thought ya were dead!

‘Course Ah can see yer not dead! Yer standin’ there an’ talkin’ t’ me!

Professor said that Magneto was there an’ Ah just got real scared. Ah thought that he’d do somethin’ awful t’ ya.

No! Logan, calm down. No, Ah don’t think the Professor needs three new holes in his chest. He didn’t mean t’ worry me. Ah asked him a question an’ he answered it. Simple as that.

Logan, please.... Please just stop. Ah just... Ah just wanna go t’ our... t’ our room? Okay? Can we do t-that?

Thank ya, sugah.

Ah’m fine.

No Ah’m not really upset. It’s hormones.

Yeah, hormones. An’ they’re gonna be getting worse soon. This is just the beginnin’. Wait till Ah get t’ the point where Ah can’t see mah toes. That’ll be pure hell fer ya.

Oh mah Gawd. Logan’s bein’ all sweet an’ tender....

With witnesses!!

He’s down on his knees now an’ rubbing his face against mah stomach real gentle like. Ah can hear him purrin’ too. It’s like he’s givin’ mah stomach a massage. Feels real nice. An’ he looks so damn beautiful like this. His hair all rumpled and sweaty, face flushed, eyes closed. Have Ah ever mentioned how wonderful Logan’s hands are? Like right now when he’s rubbin’ his hands up an’ down mah back...an’ mah hips....

Logan. Sugah. Ah think we hafta head upstairs now.

Well if ya keep kissin’ me like that, Ah’m not gonna be wearin’ clothes fer much longer.

No, it won’t be mah fault, it’ll be yer fault.

Ah like this. Logan’s got me up in his arms now an’ is carryin’ me towards the elevator. Behind him, Ah can see everyone starin’ at us. Their eyes are practically buggin’ outta their heads. Scooter looks ‘bout ready t’ have an aneurysm.

Back where we started.

Ah’m naked.

Logan’s naked.

He’s pressin’ lots o’ soft kisses on mah stomach an’.....

Sweet bleedin’ Christ!!

The End

Email: crazyundeadfairy@yahoo.com