Nick left his horse where it could enjoy the cool breezes and eat to its hearts delight. Nick approached the small fenced area, but was suddenly overcome with emotions and dropped to his knees. Feeling weak and alone Nick let himself lean over and took a seat on the ground while closing his eyes and gathering his thoughts.

Joshua, Nick's eighteen-year-old son, was once more the cause of his father's anger. They butted heads on everything these days. Today's argument was no different. Josh insisted the ranch be diversified. He saw the Barkley future tied more to their multiple agricultural interests and not the cattle business. Jarrod already moved the Barkley family away from the mining business years before and agreed with decreasing their interest in the cattle market. But the cowboy in Nick simply didn't want to let go of something, which was so much a part of his very being.

Nick reached over to pick up a few pebbles and threw them angrily at a far tree. Why did his own son want to drop out of the business, which made this family's fortune? The fortune Josh and his younger siblings would one day command. Jarrod's four daughters showed no interest in the ranch other than their annual visits from San Francisco and Audra's girls cared even less since grandma Victoria visited Sacramento on a regular basis. No, it was Nick's children who loved the ranch and all of them, his four boys and three girls, would forever value their voting rights concerning the ranch's business decisions.

Nick laid down and watched a puffy cloud stroll across the sky. With each breath he calmed as the anger eased from his body, mind, and soul. Closing his eyes Nick gratefully listened as the breezes swished through the trees, a nearby creek flowed, and the birds sang their spring love songs. He chuckled to himself knowing a visit to this quiet corner of the ranch had once more worked it's magic.

"Okay, Heath," Nick smiled and relaxed more, "I hear you, little brother."

Nick smiled knowing the sounds he rarely let himself be quiet enough to hear were Heath. That boy was the quietest darn creature the good Lord ever placed on this ranch, but now Nick was grateful for the lessons his brother taught while not uttering a sound. Nick knew Victoria came here to listen quite often even though they rarely spoke of it. Somehow they both found comfort in the knowledge Heath's presence was echoed across the ranch with each breeze which ruffled a leaf, each ray of dawn hitting the barn roof, or a small animal scurrying across the verandah.

Without realizing what was happening Nick dozed off. Instantly he traveled to those last days with his younger brother. Jarrod worked fast and efficiently to get back to the prison camp. He helped Nick carry Heath to the wagon after the doctor quickly assessed his injuries and poured two large buckets of water across the overheated man. Heath began to shiver before they got to the doctor's house. Jarrod covered him with a blanket while Nick held Heath close.

They carried Heath into a bedroom at the doctor's house and suffered through the next few hours of torture with him. The doctor washed and cleaned all of Heath's various wounds, cut away dead tissue from the burn on his leg, and did what he could to repair the already constricted skin on Heath's back where the new lashings tore apart the scar tissue left from Carterson. While the doctor cleaned his instruments and put away his supplies Heath fell into an exhausted sleep. The three men stepped out into the hall to speak.

"I'm afraid your brother is a very ill young man."

"We know," Jarrod moved closer and put an arm around Nick's shoulders.

"The leg is horribly infected as are the back wounds. The damage to his kidneys and other major organs from the hours he spent basically being baked alive ... Well, the outlook is very poor. Very poor."

"What can we do?"

"Heath shouldn't be moved. For now I would recommend we keep him comfortable, treat the wounds, keep his temperature as normal as possible, and rehydrate him if Heath can keep anything down. I'll gladly medicate your brother as needed for pain, but we must remember his body is unable to handle much of anything besides a bit of water right now. We can tackle the pain at Heath's request or when you two feel the need to speak for him. Right now I must clean up and get out to see a few patients. Is there anyone I could notify for you?"

"I'll write out a few wires while you are dressing. Thank you, doctor."

"WAIT, JARROD! ARE YOU SAYING THERE ISN'T ANYTHING ...," Nick took a few deep breaths while Jarrod rubbed his shoulders, "Are you saying there isn't anything for us to do, doctor?"

Nick felt himself resting back in Jarrod's care.

"Please, I hope you will feel free to call in another doctor if you think it would help in anyway. From my assessment I've found there to have been earlier damage which makes these new injuries even more complicated than normal. Am I right assuming your brother suffered similar injuries in his youth?"

"Yes, doctor," Jarrod spoke for both brothers, "Heath survived Carterson, but he told us he left there very ill and was lucky to recover."

"As I feared," the doctor shook his head, "So much damage. Scar tissue and who knows what else going on inside of him. Hard to believe Heath could suffer the same horrors twice during such a young life."

Nick tried deep breathing to stay calm. Jarrod made his mind review what to think, do, or say.

"Nick why don't you keep Heath company while I write out these wires for the doctor. Then you can clean up and I'll sit with him."

Nick wandered away in shock and sat clinging to Heath's hand. The doctor and Jarrod watched as the tall cowboy laid his head down on the mattress overwhelmed by exhaustion, fear, and sorrow. Without moving or opening his eyes Heath began to pet Nick's hair. Jarrod turned away before he was unable to think through what to write in his wires. The doctor started up the stairs but turned when he heard Jarrod whisper.

"Are you sure, doctor?

"I'm afraid I am. Miracles are always possible and I've seen my share of them during twenty-five years in medicine. But in my assessment your brother has only another day or possibly two left on this earth. I'll do whatever I can to keep him comfortable and assist your family."

"Thank you, doctor."

Jarrod watched the man walk wearily up the stairs, glanced at Heath offering silent comfort to Nick, and then sank into a desk chair to write his wires. Audra was away on holiday with friends, mother at home in Stockton, and he wired Stockton's doctor for a second opinion on Heath's case. Leaving the wires by the doctor's bag Jarrod returned to comfort his brothers.

Heath rallied when Victoria arrived early the next morning. He continued to refuse anything for the pain, but seemed to find comfort in her touch and the sound of her words. Mostly Heath slept wanting to talk or simply hold someone's hand when he did open his eyes. The three Barkleys took turns while making sure Heath was never alone.

Heath smiled at Jarrod after a long sleep full of dreams of his mother and his childhood in Strawberry. For once the dreams stayed happy and the memories warm. Jarrod wiped his brother's face with a cool cloth and moved close to be sure their eyes met.

"Penny for your thoughts, brother Heath."

Heath smiled as Jarrod held his hand, "I was just thinking I must have done something good."

"Sorry," Jarrod smiled back and ran his free hand through Heath's blond hair.

"I guess you and mother must have been right. I always thought you were crazy trying to convince me I was a good person ... Worthy of the Barkley name."

"Why didn't you believe us before now, Heath?"

Heath laughed which eased Jarrod into joining him, then continued, "Oh I've done a few things in this life," Heath raised an eyebrow, then continued, "I would prefer not to share even though I know I've got some answering to do at those pearly gates real soon."

"We'll see about that!"

Heath held Jarrod's hand tighter and their eyes exchanged the honesty of the moment and quieted Jarrod's protests.

"Growing up in Strawberry and for so many years after that I fought all the labels people gladly threw on my shoulders. I was fighting long before I even knew the word's hurtful meanings. I might have been flailing against the tide, Jarrod, but in my heart I believed the words were true.

"You, kind brother, have taught me the gift of words and the need not to underestimate their impact and more importantly their value in our lives. I figure I must have done something good to live long enough to spend time with you ... Learn from you. Seeing you listen and evaluate the labels which walked on Barkley land when I did gave me the ability to begin to shed those awful words. I'll never be able to thank you for that, big brother."

"There's nothing to thank, Heath."

Heath shook his head and closed his eyes unable to stop from drifting away from their conversation, whispering, "Yes, there is, Jarrod. Yes there is ..."

"What's so interesting, little brother."

Heath smiled while continuing to look outside, "shhhh."

Nick sat for a moment and suddenly heard the baby birds protesting loudly for their dinner. As he turned his attention to a tree across the way from the doctor's house Nick saw the mother bird fly in and feed her young before pushing them all down into the nest for an afternoon rest. When Nick returned his eyes to his brother, Heath was watching him and smiling.

"Never a thing wrong with your eyes and ears, Heath!"

"Then why have you spent the last year and a half yelling at me?"

Nick started to formulate a defense, but then saw the twinkle in Heath's eyes and stopped. Suddenly frightened Nick reached for Heath's shoulder and held on while unable to stop his tears. The moment left him speechless.

"No, regrets Nick. You mustn't have any regrets."

Nick shook his head in agreement while taking some deep breaths and gaining a bit of control.

"How about you, Heath? Any regrets?"

Heath smiled and closed his eyes. For a moment Nick thought his little brother drifted off, but then Heath opened his eyes and stared deeply into Nick's. For a moment Nick was sure Heath could see his very soul.

"I've done some dumb stuff, but I've only got one big regret."

"Give?" Nick tried to smile.

"I always wanted to meet a gal and have a bunch of kids. Ya know ... All those kids you've been assuring me would be terribly spoiled."

"Yes, I know the ones."

"Nick," Heath pulled hard on his brother's hand, "You are gonna have to have that pack of kids for me."

Nick laughed and sat close while smiling and shaking his head.

"Nick, I mean it. Have a family ... Lots of kids. And love them more than your life. Every once in a while when they want something dumb or frivolous just give it to them. Surprise the heck out of them and show up on the verandah with their heart's desire."

"Oh, I see. You're feeling a bit poorly and think that gives you the right to tell me what to do!"

Heath laughed and closed his eyes once more. Nick held his hand when it weakened and threatened to fall limply back to the bed.

"No," Heath whispered with his eyes shut, "If you spoil them a bit then I'll be there. That's all."

Nick put his head on Heath's shoulder and silently agreed. Victoria came in and gently rubbed Nick's back. When she pulled him to a sitting position Heath opened his eyes and smiled at them both.

"One suggestion, Nick," Heath took some breaths and fought the lethargy trying to swallow him, "When you get mad ... And you know you will ... Take a minute and walk away before you go hollering. Think of me and for one glorious moment LISTEN. Listen to your children, Nick. Listening isn't really hard to do, Nick, just listen. Please try ..."

Heath drifted away and Victoria held Nick while he tried to come to grips with what was happening to their family. When he was ready Nick left for a walk with Jarrod. No one wanted dinner as their day with Heath flew into memories. The brothers popped in and out during the night, but Victoria stayed with her youngest boy. Heath opened his eyes occasionally and once he smiled, but he was usually too weak to speak. The horribly sick man didn't even moan as Heath was moved or his wounds treated. They passed the night in silence while Victoria prayed for a miracle.

Dawn was less than an hour away as Victoria stared out the window and took in a few deep breaths. When she went back towards the bed to caress her blond son's cheek Heath opened his eyes and smiled. Victoria bumped his injured leg as she moved closer to sit on the bed with her arm around his shoulder.

"Oh, Heath ..."

Heath patted the bed where Victoria had been going to sit, pleading, "It doesn't hurt, mother. Really!"

She took his word sensing they both needed to be close.

"I've been so lucky, mother. Please don't be sad. I'd rather you think of the days of grace you gave me."

"Days of grace?" Victoria stroked Heath's hair.

She watched Heath search the horizon for dawn, which was his favorite moment of any day.

"Hannah used to tell me every life has a few days ... Days of grace she called them. You have to work hard not to be so bitter or blinded by hate to miss them. She said God provides them even in the midst of terrible sorrow.

"For me, I've had the past eighteen months ... All of them were days of grace. I have you to thank for that, mother."

Victoria did her best to smile while rubbing his back and face without giving in to the shakes which threatened to overcome her entire body. Heath watched a few more moments before closing his eyes and resting. She thought he had gone back to sleep until Victoria noticed a tear rolling down Heath's face. Victoria gently wiped the tear and kissed her brave son's cheek.

Heath opened his eyes and gazed into hers, confessing, "I'm glad Audra isn't here, mother. Don't tell her I felt like this because she wouldn't understand. Tell Audra I want her to think of me when she rides full speed across the ranch. I'll always be with her and wouldn't want Audra thinking of me all broken to pieces in this bed."

Victoria nodded unable to find words. Heath took some breaths, put down the pain he denied feeling, and gazed to the horizon for strength. They watched enjoying the form of communication, which solidified the bond between them since Heath rode onto the Barkley ranch. Suddenly Heath tried to sit up, but then fell back into the bed. The pain, fear, and panic painted on his drawn face made Victoria want to pull away to get the doctor.

"No, mother, please stay," Heath clung to her and begged while gulping air and striving for control.

Heath settled in a bit while all Victoria could do was hold tight.

"All my life ... I've had this dream," Heath's breathing was heavy as he struggled to tell her something the boy felt important, "I dreamt my father ... came to get me. I used to think he would ride into Strawberry and make everything okay."

Heath took a moment and rested as he clung to Victoria. His struggle for air left no doubt in his mother's mind what was happening. Victoria moved her face closer so Heath would know she was staying right by his side.

"Once at Carterson ... I should have died. I was strung up ... after another whipping and it was so hot," Heath closed his eyes and winced as if back in the horrible place, "Then I dreamt my father rode in through the front gates, struck down the guards, and saved me. He pulled me up in front of him on an incredible horse and his arms were so strong, so very strong...."

Heath struggled to open his eyes then searched for Victoria and some focus, "Do you think ... I mean would it be all right if I asked to be buried over in the stand of trees with father? I'd like to think father might help me cross over. I'd be lying if I told you this dying wasn't frightening for me, mother."

"Of course, darling," Victoria choked out a whisper while stoking his face.

"You Barkleys," Heath gasped and held tight as pain shot through him.

Heath breathing became a horrible struggle between his will and the inevitable. Jarrod and Nick quietly entered the room and knelt on the other side of Heath. They both touched him and quietly told Heath they loved him. Heath fought off whatever physical demon was hurting him. Sensing Victoria, Nick, and Jarrod's presence Heath started to relax into his family's embrace.

Heath looked at Victoria, barely whispering between fractured breaths, "You Barkleys ... spoiled me ... For a man ... who thought himself a loner ... I sure as heck have gotten used to not being alone."

They caressed him and their hands reassured Heath as he felt his will slipping away. Surrounded by love Heath let their cooed words and gentle touch erase any sign of panic. Finally the pain seemed to melt from his body. For an instant the boy glanced at Victoria and mouthed the words "I love you, mother." Heath turned his eyes from his family and looked to the horizon. Victoria watched her youngest son turn the incredibly blue eyes she would forever miss back to the window. A few moments later she felt Heath's gentle grace let go of her hand. She fell on her son's limp body letting her eyes turn to the first rays of dawn, which Heath loved so very, very, much. Jarrod and Nick held them both. Victoria quietly prayed out loud trying to honor the young man who changed so many lives in his brief stay on earth:

"Dear God, Thank you for this wonderful young man, my son, Heath. Please ease his suffering and grant this beloved child the peace he so richly deserves. Grant Heath's wish, Oh Lord, be with him and don't let my boy be afraid as Heath crosses into Your loving embrace. Thank you, Father, for letting us share these past few months ... These days of grace."

Unable to continue Victoria let herself cry until Jarrod's gentle arms lifted her from Heath's body. They left Nick to grieve alone.

BVBVBVBVBVBBVBBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBVBV

Nick slammed the front door. Victoria jumped, but then composed herself in the chair by the living room fire.

"WHERE'S JOSH?"

Victoria rose and embraced Nick when he entered the room.

"He, Ann, and the other children went to the Morris' party. Remember?"

"No, I forgot."

Nick flopped into a chair and his mother offered him one glass and kept the other as Victoria eased back by the fire.

"I'm glad. It will be nice to have you all to myself at supper, Nick."

Nick laughed before gulping his shot and getting up to pour another.

"Supper ready, mother?"

"No, you have an hour. Why?"

"I think I'll write a quick note to Jarrod and ask him about selling off another chunk of the herd so we can plow under the north pasture for planting."

Victoria smiled at the fire reviewing Joshua's stormy revelations before Nick's oldest boy left for the party. Josh carried on about his father's inability to see the need for the Barkley ranch to diversify in order to survive the current economic times. The angry boy insisted his stubborn father was incapable of LISTENING. Without voicing his feeling it was obvious Josh also believed Nick didn't value his opinions regarding the ranch and left for the party feeling terribly hurt.

"That's a good idea, Nick. Take your time I haven't even started to read the paper."

Nick walked over and gently kissed his mother. As his spurs jangled across the foyer Victoria smiled sensing Heath's grace pass through the room.

"He listened, Heath," Victoria whispered, "What a charmer you are, sweetheart ... Nick listened!"