The music stops as the lights die down and the stage is bathed in a green glow. Gold dollar signs made from laser light begin floating around as the drums open into "Immortal" by Clutch. There's a HUGE pop as the new president, Gordon A. Powell III steps out onto the stage and waves to the fans. He basks in the fans' love for a minute before the music stops and he speaks.

"Welcome everyone to a new era in the Robo Wrestling Federation, welcome to the King of the Forest!!!" Another large pop emanates from the crowd. "Despite the tragedy that has occured, we will go on to have a good time tonight and crown a new champion! I've waited a long time to say this, and now I have my chance. LET'S LET THE ASSKICKING BEGIN!!!" The crowd roars as GAP's music hits once again and he walks backstage through the curtain.

FIRST ROUND

"Sensual" Benny LaBenze vs. Ken Wild

"Sexy Boy" begins playing and there's a mixed reaction from the crowd as "Sensual" Benny LaBenze makes his debut here in the RWF. There are more cheers as he stops to pose on the stage and his valet, Jennifer Wood, steps out behind him, wearing a skirt that a girl would have to shave to wear, and I don't mean her legs. They walk down to the ring and pose together once inside. "Falling Away From Me" breaks into Benny's song, and Ken Wild wastes no time getting to the ring. He's pumped up for his chance to win some gold. He slides into the ring and goes straight for Benny, who seems too busy admiring his own physique to see the attack coming. Wild pummels Benny with right hands and then whips him to the turnbuckle, following closely behind with a clothesline. He hits Benny with alternating knife-edge chops and kicks to the ribs as the crowd gets behind him. "Whoo!" they shout after every chop. They're just happy to finally see some live action once again. Benny catches one of Wild's kicks and trips him up, sending him to the canvas. He quickly follows up with an elbow drop to the caught knee and slides outside. Benny grabs Wild's leg and drags him out a bit, then takes the knee and smashes it against the ringpost. Jennifer cheers Benny on as he does it a couple more times. Benny rolls back into the ring and picks Wild up. He whips Wild to the ropes, and Wild goes for a clothesline. Benny ducks and rolls through with the half crab on the return. Wild is yelling out in pain as Benny locks down on it. After some struggling, Wild reaches the ropes and the ref makes Benny break the hold. Benny picks Wild up again, but this time, Wild elbows Benny in the nose. Benny cups his hands over his nose and turns, then Wild takes his chance and grabs him, hitting "The Wildplex!" Benny's head slams against the mat and he squirms as the ref makes the count. 1, 2... kickout by LaBenze. Wild gets to his feet and his a standing leg drop on Benny. He goes to pick Benny up, but gets kicked in the gut. Benny grabs Wild's arm and tries to hit the "Sensualator," but Wild reverses and sends Benny to the ropes. He runs after and goes for the "Running Yakuza Kick." Benny ducks out of the way and Wild racks himself on the top rope. Benny grabs the rope and racks Wild over and over again! He pulls Wild off and this time is able to connect with the "Sensualator!" He covers Wild, 1, 2, 3!
"Sensual" Benny LaBenze advances to the second round.

Death Warrior vs. "The Intern" Carnage

Carnage steps out onto the stage with a microphone in hand and wearing his old outfit as "Quiet Storm" by Mobb Deep booms through the arena. He's booed mercilessly as he motions for the music to cut and starts to speak. "This 'Intern' crap has gone on long enough. (A week maybe?) I just wanted everyone to know this before I kick the crap out of that fa..." Before he can finish his sentence, Death Warrior flies out from the back and spears Carnage from behind. DW kicks Carnage as he rolls down the aisle. "My god, the match hasn't even started yet and Carnage is getting his ass handed to him by Death Warrior of all people!!!" shouts commentator Dan Gosnell, "He could actually win this thing!" DW rolls Carnage into the ring and jumps over the ropes, hitting Carnage with a springboard leg drop. The bell rings and the match has started. DW picks Carnage up and drops him back down with a snap suplex, looking smooth for once in his career. Carnage is back up and goes for a clothesline, but DW ducks and rolls him up with a handfull of tights! 1, 2...SO CLOSE!!! DW tries to whip Carnage to the ropes, but it's reversed. Running clothesline is ducked by Carnage who nails DW in the jaw with a "Rated R" superkick on the return. Carnage hits the "Carnage Driver" and makes the easy pin over Death Warrior. "Whoops, guess not," declares Gosnell as the ref raises Carnage's hand in victory to a chorus of boos.
Carnage advances to the second round.

Zeke vs. The Patient

The sounds of Outkast accompany Zeke as he walks down to the ring. The fans cheer this rising young star as he jumps over the ropes and climbs the turnbuckle to acknowledge his fans. He stretches out on the ropes and turns to face the stage as "Fuck Tha World" begins playing and Doc Mangahaus walks out. He walks about halfway down the ramp, smiling at Zeke the entire time, then turns and points to the stage as the lights go out. This is quickly followed by a huge orange pyro explosion! The Patient, as big as he ever was, clean shaven and looking like a man possessed charges the ring. The crowd explodes as the two men trade blows. Patient takes a quick advantage, though, as he muscles Zeke into a corner. He winds up for a haymaker, but Zeke ducks under it, spins Patient around and hits a flurry of karate kicks about his head and face! The crowd cheers as Patient tries to get his bearings. Zeke forces Patient into the corner, leaps from a standing jump to the middle turnbuckle, then nails an awesome Huracanrana that pins Patient to the mat 1-2-KICKOUT! Zeke then hits the ropes and comes back with a flying body press 1-2-KICKOUT! Zeke hits a couple more elbows to Patient, that backs him to the ropes. Zeke bounds off and launches at Patient … WHO CATCHES HIM! Patient smiles sadistically, then hits a fallaway slam that sends Zeke over the ropes and to the concrete floor of the arena. The crowd chants "Holy shit! Holy shit!" as Mangahaus actually comes over and offers words of encouragement to Zeke. Patient grabs a chair and makes his way around the ring. When he raises the chair to devastate Zeke, out of nowhere, Zeke hits a spin-kick that launches the chair into Patient’s face and staggers him. Zeke then runs towards the announcer’s table, bounds off of it and hits a "Hallucination"(Front Flip to Missle Dropkick)! The crowd goes apeshit having not seen that move in their entire lives! Patient is launched back into the steel steps as Zeke is pumped. Zeke takes a few steps back as Patient leans back against the steps. Zeke gets a head start, charges Patient and goes for the Coup de Gracie "The Bullet"(Full sprint into a front handspring into a dropkick like kick). PATIENT MOVES!!! Zeke impacts with the stairs and starts to clutch his knee. Patient, sensing an opening, immediately grabs the ring bell and places Zeke’s knee on the steps and delivers a wicked blow!!! Zeke screams in pain as Patient picks him up and rolls him in the ring! It seems Patient might have grounded the high-flying risk-taker! Patient crawls into the ring and proceeds to drop heavy-handed blows to the head of Zeke, who is hopping on one leg now. As Zeke is staggered, Patient sets him up for the "Lights Out" Powerbomb! When Patient hoists Zeke up … DDT OUT OF NOWHERE! MY GOD! COVER 1-2-KICKOUT!!! Zeke points to the top rope and the crowd goes crazy, but with his bad wheel he’s forced to take a little bit too long … Zeke leaps and tries for a guillotine leg drop and connects! Another cover, 1-2 and Patient kicks out again! Zeke is racking his brain trying to figure out how to take the big man down. He picks Patient up and goes for the "Enigma", but Patient powers out and hits a modified "Whiplash Effect" piledriver!!! Both men lay on the mat as the referee counts. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6... All of the sudden the lights go out and red spotlights search around the arena. When the lights come back on, Vanity ShowWood is standing in the ring, ready to nail Zeke with a "Flashbulb", but Zeke isn't there. Both he and Patient are standing behind Vanity with grins on their faces. Vanity slowly turns around, knowing he's in trouble. Zeke and Patient start beating the piss out of Vanity with fists and kicks! He tries to run, but Patient gets a hand around his neck, holding him steady. Doc starts setting up a table outside as Zeke nails Vanity with a "Head Trauma" superkick. He picks Vanity up and hands him to Patient, who's poised on the top turnbuckle. Patient lifts Vanity up and, OH MY FUCKING GOD, DROPS HIM IN A "LIGHTS OUT" POWERBOMB OFF THE TURNBUCKLE AND THROUGH THE TABLE ON THE OUTSIDE!!! Vanity is out cold and blood is starting to ooze from his mouth as Doc stands over him laughing hysterically. Patient stands proud of himself, but loses his concentration as Zeke grabs his legs from below and drops him with a snap powerbomb from the turnbuckle! Zeke covers quickly as the ref counts, 1,2,3!!! Zeke upsets the monster Patient! Patient is up and gets in Zeke's face as the ref is raising his hand. He looks intense as he stares into Zeke's eyes. Patient then grabs Zeke's other hand and raises it high! He and Zeke shake hands in a show of sportsmanship, and maybe even friendship, then leave the ring taking one last look at the fallen Vanity.
Zeke advances to the second round.

Paramedics come out to check on Vanity who is lying motionless on the floor. They ready the stretcher and slowly lift him onto it as the Robotron comes to life. Gordon A. Powell is standing in the hallway pacing back and forth, he looks a little worried, as if he's trying to figure out what to do next. A pair of voices can be heard around the corner, arguing about something. One of them says, "I'm telling you, Bea Arthur is the sexiest of the Golden Girls!" The other replies, "What the hell are you talking about? They're all old, wrinkled and nasty!" They turn the corner to reveal themselves as the rookie, Terry Williams and Suicidal. Gordon seems less worried as he stops the two.

Gordon: Just who I wanted to see!!!

Suicidal: Bea Arthur?

Terry: No dumbass, he's talking to me. Wait, really?

Gordon: Yes you. Sunset Sanchez has no showed and I'm out a wrestler. What do you say kid, are you ready to take that step up?

Terry: Hell yeah! When do you want me to wrestle?

Gordon: You're up right now, go on out there!

Suicidal: Estelle Getty fan eh? I gotcha...

Terry: Come on you crazy bastard, I got a match!

Gordon shakes his head as the two run to the ring.

Shay vs. "The Innovator" Terry Williams

Shay is already standing in the ring as "Blind" by Korn hits the PA. The fans pop mildly for Suicidal, but there isn't too much crowd reaction for either of these rookies. The bell rings and the confident Terry raises his hand to Shay. Test of strength??? Shay feigns like he's going for it, but kicks Terry in the gut instead. He goes for a trademark quickly with a "Side Kick," but Terry sidesteps it and shoves Shay into the ropes. He hits a neckbreaker on Shay and covers him for a 1 count. Shay is back up and both men are trading punches. Shay tries to get a few kicks in, but Terry gets in too close for that. Terry whips Shay to the corner and follows through with a splash. He then whips Shay to the opposite corner and goes for another splash, but Shay dodges and this time hits the "Side Kick" right to Terry's head. Terry is down and Shay climbs the turnbuckle, then stalks Terry. Suicidal taunts Shay from the outside and gets his attention just long enough for Terry to stumble into the ropes and rack Shay on the turnbuckle. Terry climbs up and slaps the goozle on Shay for the "Zero Effect," but Shay lays some elbows into Terry's ribs and fights back. Both men jockey for position, but Terry comes out on top and hits the "Zero Effect"(chokeslam to Rock Bottom off the top rope). He reaches over and covers Shay for the 1, 2, 3!
"The Innovator" Terry Williams advances to the second round.

Kave Blackwell vs. "Jihad" Johnny bin Laden

"Party Hard" blasts over the PA as beer fills the air and everyone’s favorite frat boy, Kave Blackwell makes his way to the ring. Suddenly, Kave’s music cuts off as "Jihad" Johnny bin Laden makes his way down to ringside with all 17 of his wives in tow, wearing the traditional burqas. The bell sounds and Kave launches himself at Laden before he can even remove his turban. It falls to the wayside and one of his wives picks it up. Kave starts landing some vicious blows about the head of Laden, launches him from turnbuckle to opposite turnbuckle, hitting clothesline after clothesline. Kave is mad and the crowd is screaming "USA! USA! USA!" With every clothesline. Laden is shaken as Kave hits a quick "Sorority Sister Slam" (Rikishi Driver). COVER! 1-2 KICKOUT! Laden is pulled up by Kave as he shakes his head, signaling he’s not done with Laden yet, Just as the crowd roars its approval, Laden hits a low blow that sends Kave to one knee. Laden quickly follows it up with a short clothesline and an elbow drop. The crowd immediately starts to boo as Laden does a sloppy cover, posing for not even a one-count. Kave is trying to make his way to his feet as Laden starts to scream at him in Arabic. As Kave finally finds his feet, Laden locks on "Dream Of The Almighty" (Cobra Clutch). Kave appears to be going down as he falls to both knees after the hold is locked in for a few miutes of struggling. The crowd begins to chant "USA" to no avail … after the one count, they start to chant "BEER! BEER! BEER! BEER!" Kave comes to life just as his hand is about to fall for the third time and starts to stomp his foot to the chant, overcome, Laden has no idea what to do. Kave lands a few vicious elbows to Laden’s midsection and executes a "Dunk The Drunk" (Tornado DDT) out of nowhere before collapsing to the mat himself. He gets his bearings, crawls over to bin Laden and makes the cover 1-2-KICKOUT!!! MY GOD THAT WAS CLOSE! Kave gets to his feet, throws Laden into a fireman’s carry and starts to hit a few gut-busters as the crowd begins to sense the onset of his finisher, the dreaded Keg Toss… suddenly, one of Laden’s wives jumps onto the ring, pulls her burqa open and reveals a fine set of massively huge tits!!! The crowd goes ape-shit!!! Kave starts to smile as another wife jumps up and does the same! Another wife throws a beaver shot as Kave drops Laden and starts to fondle the tits of one of Laden’s wife. As this goes on, Laden makes his way to his feet, sneaks up behind Kave and rolls him up with a handful of tights! 1-2-3!!! BIN LADEN STEALS ONE!!! Before their husband can be angry, the wives hide their "assets" and head with their husband out of the building and to the back to a chorus of boos.
"Jihad" Johnny bin Laden advances to the second round.

Cabbie Klowaski vs. Dr. Doom

The crowd sits in anticipation awaiting the next match to start and erupt as "After Dark" by Agathodaimon hits. As the bass hits Dr. Doom steps out onto the stage and marches down the aisle wearing his usual attire. He has an evil grin on his face as he climbs the steel steps and into the ring. The crowd goes crazy with mixed reactions as 'Another One Rides the Bus' by 'Weird' Al Yankovic hits. Cabbie Klowaski walks down the aisle. His black eye has faded into a light purple colour and he seems intense. Cabbie climbs the steel steps and into the ring. He stares Dr. Doom down before spearing him down and delivering a series of punches to the head and face. Doom turns it over and punches Cabbie. Cabbie pushes Doom of and gets to his feet. Doom also gets to his feet and charges at Cabbie who takes him down with a Drop Toe Hold and quickly hooks on the Passenger Killer(STF). Doom quickly and wisely grabs the ropes. The ref starts to makes a count and before the count is up Cabbie releases the hold. Cabbie grabs Doom and lifts him to his feet but Doom elbows Cabbie in the gut a couple of times before whipping him to the ropes. Cabbie bounces back and gets clotheslined down. Doom starts to stomp on Cabbie. Cabbie grabs Doom's foot, takes him down and tries to get an Ankle Lock on but Doom rolls out of it and takes Cabbie down again. Cabbie gets back to his feet just in time to duck a clothesline from Doom and grab him into a Side Belly to Belly Suplex! Cabbie covers Doom 1... 2... Doom gets his shoulder off the canvas. Cabbie somps Doom a couple of times before attempting an Elbow Drop, but Doom moves out of the way. Doom hits a Leg Drop on Cabbie before hooking a leg 1... 2... Cabbie kicks out. Doom wastes no time in going back to work on Cabbie as he hooks on a figure 4 Leg-lock! Cabbie screams out in pain and Doom singes in the Figure 4. The ref gets down and starts asking Cabbie if he gives up. Cabbie shakes his head as he screams out in pain again. Cabbie then attempts to turn it over but Doom blocks it. Cabbie then fakes turning it to the left and quickly tricks Doom by turning it the other way. Doom this time screams out in pain but is close enough to the ropes to grab the bottom rope. Cabbie releases the hold but starts to stomp Doom relentlessly. Cabbie grabs Doom and lifts him to his feet before scooping him up and slamming him down with a Body Slam. Cabbie climbs up to the second rope and dives off with a front elbow before going for another cover 1... 2... Doom kicks out again but Cabbie covers again 1... 2... again Doom kicks out! Cabbie grabs Dooms legs but Doom grabs Cabbie and rolls him into a Small Package 1... 2... Cabbie kicks out. Cabbie gets straight back to his feet and starts stomping and kicking Doom. Cabbie grabs Doom and whips him into the corner. Cabbie charges at Doom with a Splash but Doom moves sending Cabbie chest first into the top turnbuckle. Doom then grabs Cabbie and hits a Reverse DDT. Doom staggers around before hitting an Elbow drop followed by another. Doom then hits the ropes and drives himself down with a third Elbow Drop. Doom grabs Cabbie and forces him to his feet Doom scoops Cabbie up and looks to be going for a Tombstone Piledriver but Cabbie struggles and slips behind. Cabbie hits a few clubbing forearms to the upper back of Doom before grabbing him in a Belly to Back suplex position and sitting him on the top turnbuckle facing the crowd. Cabbie then climbs between the ropes onto the ring apron and climbs up the other side of the turnbuckle. Cabbie looks to scoop Doom up but Doom elbows Cabbie and starts punching Cabbie desperately. Cabbie starts swaying ready to fall. Doom swings again but Cabbie ducks it, scoops him up and hits a TOP ROPE DRIVEN OVER THE EDGE!!! Cabbie gets an arm over Doom 1... 2... 3! Another One Rides the Bus hits again as Cabbie rolls out of the ring and walks backstage with a cocky look on his face.
Cabbie Klowaski advances to the second round.

Vanity ShowWood vs. Danielle Brisbane

Vanity ShowWood is on his way to the hospital, hence Danielle Brisbane gets a bye.
Danielle Brisbane advances to the second round.

Predator vs. Blockbuster

"Schism(String Version)" hits the PA and Predator walks out to the ring in a somber mood. He enters and takes a spot in the corner, looking like he's just going through the motions. Then "Never Gonna Stop" starts playing and out comes Blockbuster with Sandra. She's talking strategy to him as they walk down to the ring. Blockbuster gets in and charges after Predator before the bell even rings. He goes for a clothesline, but Predator ducks and chops him as he turns around with no effect. Predator chops him again, and again there's no effect. BB chops Predator hard and sends him to the canvas. He picks him up and whips him to the ropes, then hits him with a HUGE body press/drop! Blockbuster gets cocky and exclaims why he's so great to the crowd. Predator gets up and hits a surprise DDT on BB. He makes the cover, but BB kicks out with authority after a 1 count. BB is up and Predator uses all of his weight to clothesline him, spilling both men to the outside of the ring. They get up and Blockbuster whips Predator into the steel steps with a resounding THUD! Sandra encourages her man as he picks Predator up and throws him over the ropes back inside the ring. Blockbuster rolls in and picks Predator up into a "Bensonhearst Bomb!" This is it! 1, 2, NO, PREDATOR KICKS OUT! What tenacity! BB is noticably upset and picks Predator up for another one, but Predator hits BB in the temple with repeated punches until he lets go. Predator shows BB the "Hard Way Down"(elevated X-factor) and goes for a cover of his own! 1, 2, Blockbuster kicks out! Sandra jumps up on the apron and gets the ref's attention, throwing something behind his back to Blockbuster. BB puts it in his mouth and when he turns around tries to spit a mist into Predator's face, but Predator sidesteps it and soccer kicks Blockbuster in the testes! BB drops to one knee giving Preadator the opening he needs to lock in the "Fade Away"(combo tazzmission/steiner recliner). Blockbuster fights it all the way, but to no avail, after a few minutes of thrashing around, he finally passes out from lack of oxygen.
Predator advances to the second round.

SECOND ROUND

"Sensual" Benny LaBenze vs. Carnage

"Sexy Boy" blasts over the PA as the women sigh. Benny LaBenze comes strutting to ringside, this time without his woman, strutting his stuff for everyone who will look. In the middle of a disco-tech disrobing of his clothes, Carnage’s music hits and Benny doesn’t even know what’s about to go down. Carnage wastes no time walking up and setting a table outside, climbing into the ring and slapping the taste out of LaBenze’s mouth mid-grind. Benny launches himself at Carnage, who counters by ducking and hitting a wicked clothesline that folds LaBenze up like a house of cards in a gale. The ladies cheer as Carnage begins to punch with a closed fist to Labenze’s face. The referee steps in and warns Carnage about fighting with a closed fist, and pulls him away. Carnage rares back like he’s about to slap the referee, when LaBenze runs up behind Carnage and hits a wicked German Suplex with a roll-up 1-2-Kickout! That was close, Carnage is dazed as LaBenze hits an Overhead Northern Lights Suplex w/Bridge! 1-2-Kickout! LaBenze is taking it to Carnage and going for quick covers! LaBenze pulls a schoolboy 1-2-Kickout! Carnage is up now, and goes for a clothesline, but LaBenze ducks, slips behind Carnage and nails an Electric Chair Drop, followed by his Reverse Regal Cutter ("The Sensualator) LaBenze quickly covers Carnage 1-2-Carnage’s foot is on the rope!!! But LaBenze jumps up and starts to celebrate, thinking he’s one… he even points to the press box and demands they start to play his music. During the argument, Carnage has time to recover and looks pissed. He stands up and taps LaBenze on the shoulder, who slaps his hand away, not even paying attention and continuing his argument with the music operator. Carnage tries one more time, but LaBenze still ignores him. Carnage then smiles at the crowd, hoists LaBenze up in a reverse fireman’ carry and delivers The Carnage Driver (Reverse DVD) Carnage hooks a leg, 1-2-3!!! LaBenze is out like tube socks and flip flops.
Carnage advances to the thrird round.

Zeke vs. "The Innovator" Terry Williams

"Ba ba, ba.. ba.. ba ba!" The sounds of Outkast pump the crowd up as Zeke comes out once again. He's standing ready in the ring when Terry Williams runs down to the ring, followed far behind by Suicidal, who has a long piece of toilet paper trailing behind him. He's chasing it around like a cat trying to catch its tail as Terry slides into the ring. The bell sounds and both men lock up. Terry has the size advantage coming into this match and uses it to muscle Zeke to the corner. A few elbows and Terry backs up to ram a shoulder into Zeke, but Zeke lifts himself up and hits a sunset flip roll-up out of the corner, 1, 2, KICKOUT! Terry is shocked by the quick move and Zeke trips him with a drop toe-hold sending his face into the turnbuckle. Zeke straps on the "Number"(Regal Stretch), but is too close to the ropes and Terry easily grabs them, breaking the hold. Terry gets up again, furious that he's being humiliated like this. He grabs Zeke and throws him across the ring like a rag doll! A kick to the gut followed by a hammer blow to the back sends Zeke down. Terry picks him up and drops him with a back suplex. Cover, 1, 2, kickout by Zeke. Terry whips Zeke to the ropes and goes for a clothesline, ducked by Zeke who goes for a "Bullet"(front handspring into a dropkick) but Terry moves and Zeke gets caught up in the ropes! Terry pulls him out and powerbombs him, but doesn't let go. He powerbombs him again, then lifts him up and finished with a dominator hitting the "Ground Zero!" He covers Zeke, 1, 2, 2 and 9/10ths AS ZEKE KICKS OUT AT THE VERY LAST SECOND! Suicidal is yelling out a strategy to Terry, who is actually listening. Suicidal then stops yelling, sniffs his armpit and immediately runs out of the arena. What a nutball... Terry turns around and calls for his finisher. He lifts Zeke up into a fireman's carry and whips him around for the stunner, but the "Record Breaker" is reversed and Zeke nails Terry with an "Enigma"(Dragon sleeper swung into a stunner)!!! He makes a quick cover and the ref counts the 1, 2, 3!!!
Zeke advances to the third round.

"Jihad" Johnny bin Laden vs. Cabbie Klowaski

bin Laden walks down to the ring, all 17 wives walking behind him again. His wives look like they put on a little weight though, maybe they took their liberties with the backstage catering? The crowd is booing him out of the arena as he stands in the middle of the ring and is handed a microphone. "Listen to me American swine! I will save you all and show you the path to righteousness, beginning with my next opponent, Cabbie Klowaski!" Cabbie struts down to the ring to his music as the wives clear a path and let him enter. He walks up to Johnny as the music stops. "Cabbie, are you ready to commit your life to Allah and all of his teachings? Are you ready to give your life for, er, I mean to god?" Cabbie replies, "Gimme a beer first!" then clotheslines bin Laden out of his boots to a HUGE POP!!! He whips Johnny to the ropes and takes him down with a "Coach Crash!" Cabbie mounts Johnny and begins humiliating him by "Beating Him to Death"(repeated punches to the side of the head). My god CABBIE'S ON FIRE! He jumps on the ropes and asks for beer from the crowd. Someone tosses him one and he starts downing it as Johnny gets the referee's attention by complaining about Cabbie grabbing his beard. Meanwhile, Johnny's wives grab Cabbie by the legs and drag him out of the ring. They pull lead pipes out of their burqas and BEAT THE PISS OUT OF CABBIE ON THE OUTSIDE! Wait a minute, these definitely aren't the same wives we saw earlier, there's hair sticking out of some of their masks! They throw Cabbie back in as Johnny dons the turban, climbs the turnbuckle and lands the "September Skies!" What a cheap bastard! He pins Cabbie 1, 2, 3. GAP walks out to the stage with microphone in hand. "That's the second time tonight you've used outside help to win. There won't be a third, because your 'wives' are banned from ringside!" The fans cheer their approval as Johnny bin Laden stomps up and down.
"Jihad" Johnny bin Laden advances to the third round.

Danielle Brisbane vs. Predator

Predator comes to the ring looking a little worse for the wear having already fought a match, and awaits the fresh Danielle Brisbane. The bell rings, and the two athletes circle each other - we all know that Brisbane is the RWF’s very own giant-killer, so Predator had best not underestimate her! The two lock up, and Predator strong-arms Brisbane to the mat with one heave of his shoulders. Brisbane looks back at Predator, scowling.. Predator then invites Brisbane to lock up again. Once, again, Predator tosses Brisbane hard to the mat. The crowd boos a bit as Predator laughs at Brisbane. Brisbane closes in, and when they go to lock up again, Brisbane ducks under, spins Predator around and starts to way-lay him with vicious kicks about his face and chest! The crowd goes apeshit, as Brisbane sends Predator to the ropes and hits a hurricanrana that sends him over the ropes and to the floor! As Predator starts to get his bearings, Brisbane does a cartwheel, handspring and launches herself over the ropes!!! … but Predator catches her, turns and tosses her like a spear into the metal pole at ringside! A sickening thud fills the arena as the crowd lets out a groan. Brisbane looks hurt. Predator rolls her in the ring and goes for a nonchalant cover, 1-2-KICKOUT! What guts by the feisty female! The crowd starts to clap as Predator picks her up and signals for a powerbomb, but when he hoists her up, Brisbane spins through and hits the "Hey Baby Swinging DDT!!!" Cover! 1-2- Predator kicks out! Brisbane screams in frustration as she begins to climb the top rope … she leaps and hits her Top Rope Leg Drop!!! 1-2-KICKOUT!!! Predator is staggering to his feet now as Brisbane climbs the top ropes again, Predator turns, and a top-rope hurricanrana is nailed! 1-2-kickout! Brisbane hits the same move again!!! 1-2-Kickout!!! Brisbane goes to the top a third time and leaps! Predator catches her and turns it into a powerbomb in one fluid motion! Brisbane’s head hits the mat hard as Predator quickly slaps on his "Fade Away" (Combination Tazmission/Steiner Recliner) Brisbane tries to fight it, but ends up tapping out in agony.
Predator advances to the third round.

THIRD ROUND

Carnage vs. Zeke

Carnage is booed on his way to the ring, and flips off the fans in response. He doesn't care what they think, he's here to win. Zeke steps onstage for the third time tonight as the fans are clearly behind him. He walks down to the ring and as he steps through the ropes, he's attacked by Carnage with a knee to the ribs. Carnage follows up with heavy blows to the back. He whips Zeke to the ropes and hip tosses him. Carnage locks an arm bar on Zeke, who reverses it and puts it back on Carnage. Carnage rolls out and tries to reverse it again, but Zeke takes him down with a standing side kick. Whip to the ropes by Zeke who hip tosses Carnage this time. Carnage gets up holding his back and looks at Zeke who stands ready for more. The crowd chants, "Zeke! Zeke! Zeke!" as they lock up again. A whip to the corner by Carnage who follows Zeke in only to get a boot to the face. Zeke leaps up on the turnbuckle and jumps off with a "Hallucination", but Carnage catches him mid-flip and drives him down hard with a powerslam. Cover by Carnage, 1, 2, Zeke kicks out! Carnage picks Zeke up and hits the "Spill Slam"(body slam to reverse DDT) and covers him again. 1, 2, ANOTHER KICKOUT! Zeke just doesn't have quit in him! Carnage gets pissed and rolls out of the ring. He starts setting up a table as Zeke begins stirring in the ring. As Carnage is finishing up, Zeke is to his feet. Carnage jumps up on the apron and catches a "Head Trauma"(superkick) falling back and landing through his own table! Zeke rolls Carnage back into the ring and pins him, 1, 2, 3!
Zeke goes on to the Main Event!

As Zeke is walking to the back, the Robotron flickers to life to see GAP cornered in the back by bin Laden's brothers in arms. He starts fighting them off, but he's quickly overwhelmed. Zeke sprints into the back to help. GAP is getting beaten until a big hand reaches into frame and grabs one of the terrorists. It's Patient!! He knocks the bastard out and starts beating down more of them as Doc, Zeke, and even Cabbie join the fray to fight off the terrorists! After a few minutes, the terrorists start to lose and quickly run away. Patient helps GAP to his feet and speaks, "You know every GOOD president has had a head of security. Things like this just don't happen when there's one around." GAP replies, "You know where I can find one of those?" Both men smile as the camera pans away and we go back to the arena where the next match is getting ready to take place.

"Jihad" Johnny bin Laden vs. Predator

Johnny is already in the ring and is furious with what's just happened! He's all fired up and waiting for Predator to make his way out. Predator comes to the ring and Johnny wastes no time attacking him. He whips Predator to the ropes, but it's reversed and Predator slams him down hard with a spinebuster! Predator picks Johnny up for "The Drop", but Johnny wiggles his way out and falls to his knees behind Predator. He hits a low blow on Predator and follows it up with "The Infidel Treatment"(reverse Russian leg sweep)! Johnny runs to the corner and quickly puts the turban back on, then climbs the turnbuckle and leaps off. PREDATOR MOVES!!! Johnny holds his head as he rolls around on the mat. Both men are down as the ref starts counting. 1, 2, 3... Johnny turns away from the ref and reaches into his beard.. 4, 5, 6... Predator is up and reaches down to pick up Johnny. As he rises, Johnny throws a ringer to distract the ref and uses the other hand to throw a fistful of powder into Predator's face! Predator tries to wipe it away as Johnny rolls him up! 1, 2, 3!
"Jihad" Johnny bin Laden goes on to the Main Event!

MAIN EVENT

Zeke vs. "Jihad" Johnny bin Laden

Johnny is still catching his breath when Zeke's music hits. He runs straight to the ring and jumps in, taking it to Johnny! Zeke gets Johnny in the corner and pummels him with rapid-fire kicks, then follows up with a spinning back kick, knocking him down. Zeke gets a running start and nails Johnny in the head with a falling dropkick. Johnny is totally dazed as Zeke props him up on the turnbuckle. Zeke climbs and sends Johnny off with a top rope huracanrana! He crawls over and makes the cover. 1, 2, JOHNNY KICKS OUT. The crowd boos as Zeke gets up and takes the attack to Johnny again. He whips Johnny to the ropes and goes for a dropkick, but Johnny grabs the ropes and stops himself, causing Zeke to hit the mat. Johnny jumps on top of Zeke and starts pounding his head in with rights and lefts. He picks Zeke up and throws him through the ropes to the outside, then quickly follows him out. Johnny whips Zeke into the guard rail and gives him a knife edge chop. He looks out to the crowd and spits on the ground before chopping Zeke again. Johnny whips Zeke into the steel steps and then stomps on him a few times. He mockingly wipes his boot on Zeke's back, then walks over and grabs a chair from the announcer's table. He takes a swing, but Zeke ducks and Johnny connects with the ring post! The chair frozen in his hands, Johnny gets nailed with a "Head Trauma"(superkick) into the chair and his face! Zeke climbs the turnbuckle and waits for Johnny to get up. Johnny slowly rises and turns around as Zeke jumps off and hits the "Hallucination" to the outside! Both men are lying on the floor as the crowd chants, "RWF! RWF! RWF!" Zeke gets up and rolls Johnny into the ring. He slides in himself and makes the cover. 1, 2, JOHNNY KICKS OUT! More booing from the fans at this. They DO NOT want to see bin Laden win this match! Zeke persists and covers him again. Another kickout after 2. Zeke puts on the "Dark Sleep"(dragon sleeper) and cinches in tight as bin Laden struggles to get out of it. Johnny somehow manages to get his hand up and rakes Zeke's eyes. Zeke stumbles back rubbing his eyes as Johnny gets up and follows through with a clothesline. He picks Zeke up and drops him down with the "Allah Bomb!" Johnny covers Zeke, 1, 2, KICKOUT! HUGE POP by the crowd as Zeke kicks out of that one. Johnny throws Zeke to the corner and stomps him repeatedly in the midsection. He whips Zeke to the opposite corner, Zeke jumps to the middle pad and leaps back with a high cross body! He connects, but Johnny rolls through for a pin, 1, 2, KICKOUT! Both men are up, Johnny goes for a clothesline, ducked by Zeke who grabs Johnny in a waistlock. Zeke goes for a German suplex, but Johnny blocks it and heel kicks Zeke in the nuts! He reverses the hold and hits his version of the German suplex, "The Great Equalizer!" Johnny runs over and locks in the "Bow to Allah"(camel clutch). He screams in Arabic at Zeke, who is fighting for all he has not to give up. Zeke struggles until the ref makes Johnny break the hold. Johnny gets up angry and gets in the ref's face. Zeke somehow has the strength to reach forward and pull Johnny down into a schoolboy pin! 1, 2, NOOOO, Johnny kicks out at the last second. Zeke gets a burst of energy and hits the ropes, as Johnny turns around, BAM!!! BULLET!!! They lay on the mat, exhausted, hurt.... Both of these men have been through hell tonight. Zeke crawls over and puts an arm over Johnny. The ref counts, 1, 2, JOHNNY'S FOOT IS ON THE ROPE! Zeke gets up frustrated, asking the ref why. As Johnny gets up, he reaches into his beard and pulls out a pair of brass knucks! He slips them on and punches Zeke in the back of the head! Zeke falls cold to the mat and Johnny acts like he's scratching his beard as he stuffs the brass knucks back into place. He covers Zeke as the ref reluctantly counts the three. "NO NO NO!!! WHY??!?!?!?!" shouts announcer Mike Colley.

Winner and NEW World Champion: "Jihad" Johnny bin Laden

Johnny stands in the middle of the ring as the crowd threatens to riot. They throw all kinds of trash and debris into the ring at Johnny as he smirks, knowing this is just the beginning. The cameras show Gordon, Patient and Doc watching on a monitor in the back. Gordon shakes his head as the cameras fade to black.