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Ocelot, Issue # Eight

~Random Scribbling of the Insane Nature~

One thing they always teach you for writing papers is to hook the reader the first paragraph--that is, propose an interesting topic, and support it with reasoning. However, I don't have many interesting things to say at the moment. So I'm just gonna say that Ran is a bitch. He's a dirty cuntrag rivaling the suckness of Lewinsky and Naval ships. His words are always slanderous, his thoughts filled in contempt, and his mouth plagued on chat about nip-rape. If I were to be stuck upon a deserted island with him, I'd take butt-sex with Skipper over it. So what if I make up words? ::Shrug:: 'Obolescent' is a mighty fine sounding jumble of consonants and vowels. But anysnays, I did actually create a retort to the foul-mouthing of myself (on his part). Unfortunately, even our lenient censorship calls for much of it to be edited, and Utena just hates the two of us sometimes. Now that I cleared that aside, I need to think of what's bothering me about the nips these days (seeing how we were told to make it hateful and all). Oh yeah. What's with the fucking dating toys over there? You know, those little balls of plastic that get excited whilst in contact with another of the same nature. Maybe sexual attraction just lost it over there. I mean, they all look alike so what the Hell does it matter if we point one out from the crowd? Then again, such signs are simply those of desperation---are those short-legged whities so needy that they'd trade the basics of dating with that of tag? ::Shrug:: If anything, it's just society that's bogged down amongst years of Feminazi oppression. Just admit it, these days we can't lay atop a girl without being yelled at for 'rape.' With the dawn of equal rights came some mighty unexpected changes, and male testicles still haven't evolved to withstand a swift kick in the groin. Seeing how the subject is fluctuating as much as Ran's personality (had to get another one in there), I'll just talk a bit about Princess Mononoke. You know, that ultra-great movie by Hayao Miyazaki. Notice how I call it a 'movie.' Not an anime title, mainly in part because it doesn't contain voluptuously breasted women, or immense sweat-drops that paste themselves to the skulls of characters. I recently acquired myself a Fansub (you know you have a few of 'em), and enjoyed the experience tremendously. What worries me, however, is the subtle, yet bearing changes of which Disney plans to place upon the film. It's obvious the characters are Jap-lookin', so why the Hell don't they hire well-known Japanese voice-talent? No, such a thing isn't possible. They strive only to appeal toward the mass-market, and in doing so, alienate an entire culture (I mean, they could at least get some Chinks or something to fill 'em in, because admittedly, we don't know that many great Japanese actors and they all sound the same. And while I'm at it, we don't know many Chinese actors either. In fact, just skip this idea entirely. Asian actors sux. Yes, 'sux', not 'suck.' I've modified my speech to suit the masses. Am I still in parenthesis? Wh)oops. Sorry 'bout that. So what have we covered? Ran being an ass...check. The Japanese and their pathetic date-toys...check. FemiNazis...check. Nip-ass actors...check. White! I don't have much more to talk about at the moment. Ah! I got it. I was recently threading through the message boards in response to the Dalai Lama's visit, and was generally appalled by some of the reactions. Frankly, I think that if you are a practicing Christian (yes, most of you) who believe in two little fucklets being produced as the beginning of mankind, you shouldn't be here. As Ran and I have noted before, the truer Christians are, in fact, Buddhists. If you'll allow me to, I'd like to end this with a poem.. Roses Art Red Violets Art Blue Ran is a bulbous prick-shit manifestation o' all our inconsistencies whom can't help himself with little children. And if you don't respect my poetry, then join the legions. G'day.

End of Rant