Scully:
(To Skinner) With all due respect, sir, I think you overestimate
your position in the chain of command.
---
Scully:
how much have you had to drink?
Frohike:
(Holding up empty bottle of liquer) Do you recycle?
---
Frohike:
He was a good friend. A redwood among mere sprouts. I guess this means
he's passing you
the torch?
Scully:
Uh, afraid not. I'm soon to be out of a job.
Frohike:
Those sons of bitches! They're rigging the game.
Scully:
And like rats they just scatter back into the wood pile.
Frohike:
The rats that killed the cat
---
Deep Throat: There is truth, you old friend, if that's all you seek. But there's no justice or judgement without which truth is a vast... dead... hollow.
---
Skinner:
Miss Scully, I think you underestimate the duties and responsabilities
of my position as
Assistant Director..
---
Guard: That thing is more sensitive than a toothache...
---
Robert Hostess:
You must be careful now to end the ceremony properly. If you leave, you
must not do any
work, change
clothes or bathe for four days.
Mulder:
That's really gonna cut into my social life...
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Mulder: I was
a dead man. Now I'm back.
---
Mulder: There are truths out there that aren't on that tape.
---
Byers: ...using
his 'scientific' data on the effects of high altitude flying, we were able
to put astronauts on the moon before the Soviets.
Langly: One
giant step for mankind...
---
Scully: Whatever
happened to Klemper?
Langly: He's
still here. Living very well at the expense of the American taxpayer.
---
Frohike: Unbelievable!
We thought you were history!
Mulder: You're
gonna have to wait a little bit longer for my video collection, Frohike...
---
WMM: This is
not a profession for men who make mistakes. My god, you presume to make
us
believe and
simply fix it with enough bullets?
---
Scully: (to Kemper)
History may be the only justice
you'll ever
know.
---
WMM: What did
you tell him, Victor? (Mulder)
Kemper: I told
him that you were the most venal man I ever met. (venal means corrupt).
---
Scully: What
do you think your father would have been
doing here?
Mulder: I dunno...
but he never came home wearing a miner's cap.
---
Scully: What
do you think?
Mulder: I'd
like to try door number one, Monty.
---
Mulder: I think
with a crow bar and a small nuclear device it might be able to get through
one of
these things.
---
Mulder: Lots
of files.
Scully: Lots
and Lots of Files!
---
Mulder: You'd
be surprised what's not on the map in this country. And what the government
will do
to keep it that
way.
---
W.M.M.: You've become your father. (To Mulder)
---
Mulder: Is there
more?
W.M.M.: More
than you'll ever know.
---
CSM: What did
I tell you, Mr. Skinner. I don't negotiate. Especially with punks like
you who think
they can bluff
me.
---
CSM: (Reacting
to Skinner showing Albert in another room) What is this?
Skinner: This
is where you pucker up and KISS MY ASS!
---
Scully: I've
heard the truth, Mulder. Now what I want are the answers.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Scully: Feel
free to jump in any time...
Mulder: Why?
You were doing just fine.
Scully: You
have a theory on what's going on here?
Mulder: I just
don't think it's lightning.
---
Scully: ...I
hope you're not thinking this has anything to do with government conspiracies
or UFOs.
Mulder: None
of the evidence so far indicates either of those possibilities.
---
DPO: why do you
want to watch all that stuff anyway? They're all a bunch of losers.
Mom: Cuz they're
on TV. I don't see you on TV.
DPO: Buuurrrrp!
Mom: Manners
don't cost, Darren, they're free! What girl's gonna want a belchin' fool
like you?
---
DPO: Hey, you
know, I think you wanna be sum-place else right now, cuz I'm in the mood
for a little
barbeque.
Zero: Naw, man,
not the cows again....
---
Mulder: That's great, now can you make me a little cherub that squirts water?
---
Mulder: 8 1/2?
That's pretty impressive, Scully.
Scully: Well,
it says it right here on the bottom...
Mulder: Ooooh.
---
Mulder: Let's go see if the shoe fits.
---
Zero: You know,
I've been thinking...
DPO: First time
for everything. (cars squeal, stop inches from each other) Aw, damn ABS
brakes...
---
Zero: ...There's
another slight problem, she's married to your boss.
DPO: Maybe I
could fry him.
Zero: Dude,
he's your Boss!
DPO: Not if
he's dead he wont be.
---
Scully: (Seeing
Mulder flipping through DPO's copy of Celebrity Skin) I'm surprised you
haven't
already read
that issue.
Mulder: Oh,
I have. April is the cruelest month, but mine didn't come with this. I
found it between
Miss April and
Women of the Ivy League... (picture)
---
Scully: So what? Are we supposed to charge him with assaulting a cellular phone?
---
DPO: You know,
we could take an Accord or a Maxima... (Starts each of them with a wave)
you know, you like
any of these?
Or hey, you know, if you don't want to go Japanese, your know, how 'bout
a Taurus? (Starts the Taurus) Naw, you're right, you know, all these cars
SUCK!
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Clyde
Bruckman's Final Response 3x04
Clyde: What the
hell is Lallapallazzo?
Clerk: Who's
Buddy Holly?
---
Puppet: Don't apologize, you're a better dancer than my last date.
---
Zelma: Mr, please,
you're hurting me. (Lost accent)
Puppet: I know,
I know, but I'm sorry. But you're a fortune teller. You should have seen
this coming.
---
Cline: So what
do they say about the entrails?
Havez: Yuck.
---
Scully: (As M is being booted out) I can't take you anywhere.
---
Scully: Sorry about your Negative Energy, Mulder. You missed one hell of a good show.
---
Mulder: (with
a straight face) Mr. Yappi, read this thought.
Yappi: (snaps
his head back as if hit) So's your old man!
---
Young Husband: But this is a really GOOD boat.
---
Young Husband: Mister, you really need to work on your closing technique.
---
Clyde: (To Mulder's badge) I'm supposed to believe that's a real name?
---
Scully: (to Mulder) Oh, so now YOU'RE psychic?
---
Scully: (to Mulder)
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to give off any negative energy.
Clyde: Negative
energy, what is it?
---
Clyde: Oh, sometimes it... just seems that everyone's having sex except for me.
---
Clyde: You'll find a woman tomorrow morning... by the fat little white nazi stormtrooper (FLWNS) at Glenview Lake.
---
Mulder: Be honest, Scully. Doesn't that propane tank bear more than just a slight resemblance to a FLWNS?
---
Mulder: Do you
receive any other impressions from it? (the brass 3 frog thing)
Clyde: It's
ugly. (drops it) Next.
---
Clyde: I got
it. This is yours. This is from your New York Knicks T-Shirt!
Mulder: Miss.
Clyde: This
is worse than playing the Lotto.
---
Clyde: I guess I can't see the forest through the trees.
---
Mulder: I'm glad
I could bring a little smile into your life, Mr. Bruckman. (After getting
splattered with
mud)
Clyde: I'm not
smiling. I'm wincing.
---
Scully: So who's
it from?
Clyde: (Holds
to head, Jon Lovitz impression) The Killer!
---
Scully: We can't
come up with suspects by having visions.
Clyde: Jealous?
---
Scully: (After hearing that both she and Clyde would be in bed together) Mr. Bruckman, there are hits and there are misses. And then there are MISSES.
---
Scully: Chantilly
Lace?
Mulder: You
KNOW what I LIKE. :)
---
Mulder: If my Miss Manners serves me right, that protrusion from his left cornea is a salad fork.
---
Puppet: Hey,
it's not the way it's supposed to happen.. (him being shot dead)
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Scully: Third time's a charm.
---
Speranzo: Hey, look around, we ain't got budding opportunity to itchy-scratchy outside our cell!
---
Mulder: I guess you'll be able to finish up that autopsy now, Scully. (After finding the guard's body in the office)
---
Scully: Being
obsessed with it doesn't mean you can do it. (Reincarnate)
Mulder: No,
unless he knew something we don't.
Scully: Like
what, the magic password?
---
Mulder: Is there
another competing theory?
Scully: A very
good one and one much more believable...
---
Mulder: Imagine
if you could come back and take out 5 people who had caused you to suffer.
Who would they be?
Scully: I only
get 5?
Mulder: I remembered
your birthday this year, didn't I, Scully?
---
Scully: Woman
gets lonely, sometimes she can't wait around for her man to be reincarnated...
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Scully: I'm not
observing, I'm performing it myself.
Patrolman: You're
a medical doctor?
Scully: You
sound surprised.
Patrolman: I
dunno, maybe I guess I am...
Scully: Why?
---
Mulder: Okay, it's not yet the finely detailed insanity that you've come to expect from me, it's just a theory. But what if he's not doing this out of a psychotic impulse but rather out of some physical hunger? Maybe he needs to replenish this chemical deficiency in order to survive.
Scully: From
a dry skin sample you're concluding what? That he's some kind of a fat-sucking
vampire?
---
Scully: Yeah, scorpions predigest their food outside of their body by regurgitating onto their prey but... I don't know too many scorpions who surf the internet.
---
Mulder: Scully,
I wouldn't have made a good Amway salesman, I knocked on more doors...
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Mulder: (To Captain) What? We didn't sign in at the front desk?
---
Scully: (To Captain) Tell him (General) that it's OUR protocol... (and later) you never know when he might try and kill himself again.
---
Leonard: (To
Roach) You got that... 'I'm freakin out' look on your face... 'Ts the matter?
Roach: It's
nothing.
Leonard: Bull.
I spent 2 years with your sorry ass in a gun turret, I think I know when
you got something on your mind. C'mon Private, make your report!
---
Mulder: No, what I can't figure out is why a man who's so deliberately and methodically set out to commit suicide would leave the one entrance to the room unsecured. But then again I obviously have a feeble grasp of army protocol and procedure.
---
Scully: Find
anything?
Mulder: No,
but I'm really beginning to like the tune... (listening to the backwards
tape)
---
Mulder: Sometimes the only sane response to an insane world is insanity.
---
Mulder: Leonard
Trimble?
Leonard: (motioning
to TV) No, it's Fred Astaire.
---
Leonard: How's that? Oh, he's only the guy that turned me into 2nd base by getting my arms and legs blown off. Other than that he was a real good guy.
---
Leonard: ...I'd
like to get a little shuteye.
Mulder: No sleep-walking.
Leonard: That's
good. I haven't heard that one yet. Har De Har Har.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Scully: That's spooky...
Mulder: That's my name...
---
Mulder: Have you ever experienced temporary blindness before?
Lucy: I've probably experienced everything once or twice. It's all been pretty temporary.
---
Scully: I hate
to say this Mulder, but I think you just ran out of credibility.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Scully: (to Mulder) That's not your usual brand of entertainment...
---
Scully: Mulder, this is even hokier than the one they aired on the FoX network, you can't even see what they're operating on!
---
Scully: You spent
money on this?
Mulder: $29.95...
plus shipping.
---
Scully: Front
door's boarded up.
Mulder: Back
door's been busted open. Hope nobody let the rat out.
---
Mulder: (Pulls out 2nd gun) I get tired of losing my gun.
---
Mulder: Ah, look at this. A beacon in the night. (Skinner)
---
Mulder: Well, I didn't get his name, I was too busy getting my ass kicked.
---
Scully: What
would a Japanese diplomat be doing in that house, with a dead man... with
his head stuffed in a pillow case?
Mulder: Obviously
not strengthening international relations.
---
Mulder: I just remembered a piece of evidence from the crime scene that I 'forgot' to turn in...
---
Mulder: (about the list of names) Maybe he's gonna fit her for a pillow case too.
---
Langly: Just gotta love them German optics.
---
Mulder: Gotta love that global economy, huh?
---
Mulder: I don't
remember giving you a key...
Skinner: I came
to see you. Obviously I was late for the party. (Mulder's house is trashed)
Mulder: Yeah, I guess I should really fire my maid, shouldn't I?
---
Skinner: This morning his body was found floating face down in the Seano canal. I think we can assume he wasn't diving for pearls.
---
Skinner: Because
whatever you stepped in on this case is being tracked into my office, and
I don't like the smell of it.
Mulder: Mind
if I tidy up in here a bit first?
---
Scully: So you're
saying that this is man-made.
Agent Pendrell:
What else would it be?
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Mulder: You've never seen America until you've seen it from a train, Scully.
---
Mulder: (Not able to read Japanese) Why did I study French in high school?
---
Mulder: I just want you to point it at him. Don't pull the trigger (clicks empty gun). It'll kinda gives away the game.
---
Scully: Well
done, Agent Pendrell. Keep up the good work.
Pendrell: (grinning)
Hey, thanks. Keep it up yourself!
Scully: (looks
at Pendrell funny, then leaves)
Pendrell: (regretting
what he just said) Keep it up yourself... what a doof...
---
Mother: Ooh,
god. He's dead!
Mulder: Sssshhhhhh!
He's just got a little motion sickness. I'm gonna go find a doctor. Why
don't you and your young man just find another bathroom?
---
Mulder: The NSA? Since when did they start issuing you guys piano wire instead of guns?
---
M.I.Bs: The ruler of the world is no longer the country with the greatest soldiers, but the greatest scientists.
---
M.I.Bs: What's
the next step?
Scully: It's
not on the map.
---
Mulder: As an
employee of the National Security Agency you should know that a gunshot
wound to the stomach is probably the most painful and the slowest way to
die. But I'm not a very good shot.
And when I miss...
I tend to miss low... (Aims at crotch)
---
Mulder: What
are you watching?
Scully: Your
alien autopsy video.
Mulder: You
mean I might get my $29.95's worth after all?
---
Mulder: Tick,
tick, Scully. (When she's trying to read the code from the video)
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Reverend: Most people today tend to vest themselves in science and cynicism. They expect proof for all they see. Miracles are wondrous by nature, they need no rationale. No justification.
---
Mulder: No, I think this is a case of too much faith. (Tastes "blood") And too much sugar.
---
Principal: I love my job...
---
Scully: Did you
get a composite?
Mulder: Yeah,
looks like Kevin was abducted by Homer Simpson's evil twin.
Scully: This
isn't the killer, Mulder.
Mulder: I think
that's a safe assumption.
---
Mulder: By who?
Who asked you to protect him?
Owen: God.
Mulder: Heh,
it's quite a long distance call, isn't it?
---
Scully: Mr. Jarvis,
my religious convictions are hardly the issue here.
Owen: But they
are. How can you help Kevin if you don't believe? Even the killer,
he believes.
Mulder: Townfolk
wonder why I sleep in Sundays.
---
Mulder: Any revelations?
Scully: Mulder,
would you do me a favor? Would you smell Mr. Jarvis?
Mulder: You
want me to SMELL him? (Mr. Jarvis is dead)
---
Mulder: (To Scully about Mr. Jarvis smelling like flowers) And now you're suggesting that this is Saint Owen?
---
Mulder: ...These people are simply fanatics behaving fanatically using religion as a justification. They give bona fide paranoics like myself a bad name. They are no more divine or holy than that catsup we saw on the murdered preacher.
---
Mulder: (To Scully) You never draw MY bath...
---
Scully: (To Mulder) How is it that you're able to go out on a limb whenever you see a light in the sky, but you're unwilling to accept the possibility of a miracle? Even when it's right in front of you.
---
Scully: Mostly
it just makes me afraid.
Priest: Afraid?
Scully: Afraid
that God is speaking. But that no-one's listening.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Man: I thought
that nowadays you froze the insects to death.
Bug Man: Freeze
them? Where's the fun in that?
---
Scully: (Long diatribe about improbability of Darwinian Life arising elsewhere)
Mulder: Scully... what are you wearing?
---
Frass: How you
doing? WHAT are you doing?
Mulder: Just
sitting. Thinking.
Frass: Sitting
and thinking. And talking on the phone. Who with, your drug dealer?
---
Mulder: It appears
that cockroaches are mortally attacking people.
Scully: I'm
not gonna ask if you just said what I think you just said because I know
it's what you just said.
---
Man: The image
of those cockroaches has been permanently imprinted onto my brain. I see
them every time I close my eyes.
Frass: Try not
to close your eyes.
Man: How am
I going to sleep? WHERE am I going to sleep? Certainly not in this place.
---
Frass: (After
Mulder hangs up with Scully) Who was that?
Mulder: My drug
dealer.
---
(After taking
a whiff of burning manure)
Teen Guy: Dude!
That's some good crap.
---
Another Teen: You really ought to, you know? Try it! This stuff takes your mind and just sort of, you know, expands it.
Teen Girl: Yeah, well, something tells me it's more than my mind you guys are interested in expanding.
---
Scully: Was there any evidence of drug use at the crime scene?
Mulder: Uh, well he did have a homemade lab set-up, I'm not sure what he was producing. (smells and disgusted) Aww, man! Smells like a septic tank.
---
Doc: ...After talking with Agent Mulder here I suddenly feel slightly... constipated.
---
Mulder: I see the correlation but just because I work for the federal government doesn't mean I'm an expert on cockroaches.
---
Frass: (Mulder loses roach down the drain) Next time let me handle the roaches.
---
Scully: (Reading Breakfast At Tiffany's, picks up phone and without pausing) Who died now?
---
Scully: Did you
catch it? (roach)
Mulder: Almost.
Scully: I don't
know what to tell you, Mulder. I just hope you're not implying you've come
across an infestation of killer cockroaches.
---
Mulder: ...Nice
kitchen, modern appliances, moving walls...
Scully: Moving
walls?
Mulder: Yeah,
they're rippling... (Roach pops onto Mulder's flashlight) Oooh! Cockroaches!
(Mulder screams)
Scully: Are
you alright? What happenned?
Mulder: Flashlight
went out. (Bambi shows up) Gotta go.(hangs up)
Scully: Mulder? Mulder???
---
Mulder: Well,
Dr. Berenbaum, I'm gonna haveta ask you a few questions.
Bambi: For instance?
Mulder: What's
a woman like you doing in a place like this?
---
Bambi: Well,
there have been cases where cockroaches crawled into a person's ears or
nose.
Mulder: ....Nose?
Ewwwwww....
---
Bambi: (to Mulder) I don't know if you know anything about U.F.O's...
---
Mulder: Honest?
Bambi: Eat.
Sleep. Defecate. Procreate. That's all they do. That's all WE do, but at
least insects don't kid themselves that it's anything more than that. Does
my scientific detachment disturb you?
Mulder: No, no actually I find it... quite refreshing. (Scully calls,he picks up, says) Not now (and hangs up quickly).
---
Mulder: (about
pyramids) Which may just be giant symbolic dung heaps.
Scully: Did
you know the inventor of the flush toilet was named Thomas Crapper?
---
Scully:
Who?!?!
Mulder:
Dr. Birnbaum... Anyway her theory is...
Scully:
Her name is Bambi?!?
Mulder:
Yeah, both her parents were naturalists. Her theory is that UFOs are actually
nocturnal insect swarms passing through electrical air fields.
Scully:
Her name is Bambi?!?!?
Mulder:
Scully, can I confess something to you?
Scully:
(Sounding very wounded) Yeah, sure, okay...
---
Mulder: Yeah, I had a praying mantis epiphany. And as a result I screamed. And not... not a girlie' scream, but the scream of someone being confronted by some before unknown monster that had no right existing on the same planet I inhabited...
Scully: (Pissed-off by Bambi) Mulder, are you sure it wasn't a Girlie' scream? (Man screams on Mulder's side) What was that?
Mulder: Oh, I gotta go. (Hangs up)
Scully: Mu.. No... Oh...
---
Scully: (Knowing the phone's from Mulder, sounds pissed) What happened this time?
---
Mulder: I think this man simply saw some cockroaches and scared himself to death.
---
Bambi: (Looking
at cockroach genitalia) Oh my god!
Mulder: Is it
abnormal.
Bambi: I'll
say. He's hung like a club-tailed dragonfly.
---
Ivanoff: Why are you scaring my robots?
---
Mulder: So, this
one is just programmed to head towards any object moving within the field
of its sensors.
Ivanoff: No.
Mulder: Well
then why is it following me?
Ivanoff: It
likes you.
---
Ivanoff: Anyone who thinks alien visitation will come not in the form of robots but of living beings with big eyes and grey skin has been brainwashed by too much science fiction.
---
Mulder: (Picks up a roach in the hallway of MIR. We see Mulder through it's eyes) Greetings from Planet Earth.
---
Scully: What's
going on here?
Woman: Haven't
you heard about the roaches? They're devouring people whole!
(Scully gives her a strange look)
Scully: Have
you even seen a roach?
Woman: No, but
I'm not sittin around here waiting for them either!
---
Man: (As he pays for his stuff at the store, he just got done eXplaining to Scully about the Killer Roaches) Look, keep the change.
(He looks back at Scully as he starts out.)
We're all going to be bleeding from our nipples!
---
SCULLY: All right.
(Fed-up and starts yelling, holding up her badge.)
Scully: All right, listen up!
Scully: I'm Agent Dana Scully from the Federal Bureau of Investigation. I am assuring you that you are not in any danger. Everything is going to be okay if you just calm down, and start acting rationally. Now, where the *HELL* are those road maps?
---
(Scully calls Mulder from a convenience store)
Mulder: Mulder.
SCULLY: Mulder,
this town is insane.
---
Scully: Now, you can confirm this with your... Dr. Bambi... but..
---
Mulder: ...Might
they not have also been able to perfect the extraction of methane fuel
from manure? An abundant and replenishing energy source on a planet filled
with dung-producing creatures?
Scully: (eating
Chocolates) Mulder, I think you've been in this town too long.
---
Scully: (Pulls
up neXt to Mulder's car) Let me guess... Bambi.
Bambi: Fox told
me to wait out here while he checked inside first. Should I come along
with you?
Scully: No,
this is no place for an entomologist (loading gun).
---
Mulder: (looks at his-manure-covered-self after the eXplosion of manure) Crap.
---
Frass: (Looking around after the explosion) Why don't you go home and get some rest. You look pooped.
---
(Bambi goes somewhere with Ivanoff.)
Scully: Smart is seXy.
(Mulder looks at Scully)
Scully: (continuing)Well think of it this way, Mulder. By the time there's another invasion of artificially intelligent dung-eating robotic probes from outer space, maybe their uber-children will have devised a way to save our planet.
Mulder: You know, I never thought I'd say this to you, Scully. But you smell bad...
---
Mulder: (typing) ...Created by out own tech (beep)... tech (beep) (smacks the screen) (beep beep) technology... (Damn comps... :) )
---
Mulder: Or perhaps
that step forward has already been achieved on another planet by
organisms that had a billion years head start on us. If these beings ever
visited us, would we recognize what we were seeing? And upon catching sight
of us would they react in anything but horror at the mindless primitive
hideous creatures? (Reaches for cake, then sees a weird lookin' bug
on plate. Gets a stack of papers to smack it with but stops. Looks at it
for a few seconds curiously. Then it runs across the table and Mulder smashes
it)
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Terri: You know, maybe if we weren't virgins we wouldn't be so scared. (guy thinks about it for a sec, hits the brakes and goes off of the road to take advantage of the offer)
---
Scully: The map
says turn right at the intersection.
Mulder: The
detective who contacted me told me to turn left.
Scully: At the
intersection?
Mulder: At the
stop light.
Scully: This
isn't a stop light, it's a stop sign.
Mulder: Well,
I'm sure she meant a stop sign.
Scully: Turn
right.
(Mulder goes
right, there's a pause, then you see their car race by going the other
way)
---
Mulder: (Whispering
to White right in front of Scully's face) If, uh, you detect a hint of
scepticism or incredulity in Agent Scully's voice it's because of the overwhelming
evidence gathered by the FBI debunking virtually all claims of physical
abuse by satanic cults.
White: Is that
true?
Mulder: (Cuts
off Scully) Don't ask me...
---
Scully: Where's
she going? (White)
Mulder: You
don't suppose she's a virgin, do you?
Scully: I don't
think she's even a blond...
---
Mulder: If you
detect a hint of impatience in Agent Scully's voice that's because the
FBI study also
found that in
.....
White: How do
you explain the burning coffin at the funeral?
Mulder: (Cuts
off Scully) Don't ask me.
---
Mulder: It looks
like a... goat. Some kind of horned beast.
Scully: A horned
beast?
Mulder: Yeah,
right here. In the circle.
Scully: I think
you guys are seeing something that isn't there.
---
Mulder: If it's
no bother, if it's not too big a deal, maybe you can get me a few photographs
of that thing which bears absolutely no resemblance to a horned beast.
Scully: (kinda
pissed)Sure, fine (snaps gloves), whatever.
---
White: So, what
are you doing at my house?
Mulder: I was
hoping you could help me solve the riddle of the horny beast.
---
Margi: (Like
sportscasters) Hate him, Roger.
Terri: Points
though for improved dermatology, Gene.
---
Terri: Scott
Simmons. Babe-o-licious in overtime, Gene!
Margi: Minus
the Brenda appendage.
Terri: Hate
her.
Margi: Hate
her. Wouldn't want to date her.
---
Scully: ...but
I didn'y expect you to ditch me.
Mulder: I didn't
ditch you.
Scully: Fine...
whatever.
---
Bob: Maybe Harvey's
got something to hide. We got two kids who are prepared to say he took
them on a camping trip and made them play naked movie star games! (Almost
hits Mulder in the face with
shovel handle)
---
(Both M and S
pull out prophylactics)
Mulder: Go ahead.
Scully: No,
you go ahead.
Mulder: No,
no, no. Be my guest. I know how much you like snapping on the latex.
---
Scully: The bones...
turn out to be the skeletal remains not of an infant but of a beloved 14-year-old
Llasa-Apso , formerly known as... (pulls out collar) Mr. Tippy.
Terri: (comes
in) Mr. Tippy! (eXtremely sad)
Mulder: This
may not be any time to mention it, but somebody is wearing my favorite
perfume.
---
(Mulder is sniffing
Scully's head as she's going on and on in anger at him)
Scully: ...I
find your conduct and comportment in this investigation not just alarming
but highly objectionable... (without wasting a sec) WHAT are you doing
?!?!?
Mulder: Must be Detective White...
---
(Scully smoking!)
Scully: (Whiny
impersonation of Mulder) Detective White could use our help. (Angry) Detective
White...
---
(Mulder sniffs
White deeply while she's talking.)
White: What
are you doing?
Mulder: (Sheepish)
Nothing.
White: You've
been drinking.
Mulder: Yes...
eh... I have. Which is... funny 'cause I usually, uh, normally never, I
don't drink.
(White goes
to bottle, Mulder shrugs guiltily, White picks it up and drinks almost
the whole thing.)
---
(White throws Mulder onto bed and gets on top of him)
White: Maybe
we can solve the mystery of the horny beast!
Mulder: (Suddenly
getting second thoughts) Maybe we should just watch some television...
---
Mulder: Let me
drive.
Scully: I'm
driving.
Mulder: Scully,
it's not what you think.
Scully: I didn't
see anything anyway.
Mulder: Will
you let me drive?
Scully: I'm
driving. (Now really pissed-off) Why do you always have to drive? Because
you're the guy? Because you're the big, macho man?
Mulder: No,
I was just never sure your little feet would reach the pedals. (Slams door).
(Mulder, determined to drive, goes to other car and gets in)
Mulder: (Mockingly)
I'm a macho man...
---
Terri: Look,
Scott. We're not dressed like this for the funeral. We're here to make
you feel better
tonight. Harpe
P.M.S.
---
Zaharas: I'm
just waiting for authorization.
Mulder: I'm
a federal agent!
Zaharas: Last
I heard, the federal government couldn't pay its bills. Okay, you're good
for up to $300.
---
Mulder: What
if today was my birthday?
Zaharas: Then
I'd say 'Happy Birthday!' Unless of course you were born in 1979, and then
I'd call the police.
---
Margi: Back off,
Terri.
Terri: Happy
Birthday, bitch!
---
Scully: Sure, fine, whatever.
---
Scully: (Trying to get seat moved forward) You ready?
Mulder: (Trying to get the seatbelt) You're the driver.
(Scully, before Mulder is buckled in, hits the pedal, which shoves Mulder forward)
Mulder: Uh, Scully,
if I'm not mistaken we're gonna have to take a left up here. (Scully's
accelerating) Uh, there's an intersection up here, you're gonna wanna...
(she's still accelerating) Scully,
you're gonna
wanna... (she drives through the intersection) You just... ran a stop sign
back there, Scully.
Scully: Shut up, Mulder.
Mulder: Sure,
fine, whatever.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Nemhauser: He
bit me! The sonuvabitch bit me like a dog!
Cop: You ok?
Nemhauser: Yeah
yeah...
---
Mulder: ...failed
to mention on his INS application that he spent the better part of his
20's in an insane asylum.
Scully: He was
arrested last week for the serial murders of at least seven men.
Mulder: You
thought all they [Uzbekistan] produced were great hockey players.
---
Patterson: So
what is it Mulder? Little green men? Evil spirits? Hounds of Hell?
Mulder: Scully,
this is Bill Patterson. He runs the investigative support unit out of Quantico.
Scully: Yes,
I know. Behavioral Science, you wrote the book. It's an honor, sir.
Patterson: Is
that what you think? That the suspect is possessed by some
dark spirit?
Scully: (Smiling)
No, not at all, sir.
Patterson: (Eyeing
Mulder) Strange company you keep, then.
Mulder: (Laughing
to himself) That's what always amazed me about you, Bill. How you never
fit your own profile. No one would ever guess how really mean-spirited
you are. (Walks away)
---
Mulder: Patterson
never liked me.
Scully: I thought
you were considered the fair-haired boy when you joined the bureau.
Mulder: Not
by Patterson.
Scully: Why
not?
Mulder: Didn't
want to dirty my knees. Couldn't quite cast myself in the role of the dutiful
student.
Scully: You
mean you couldn't worship him.
Mulder: Something
like that, yeah.
---
Mulder: I've
got a few theories, I'm just trying to stitch them together right now.
Patterson: With
your face stuck in a library book!
Mulder: You
said it yourself, Bill. If you want to know the artist look at the art.
(Surprised at himself) I'm finally agreeing with you.
---
Mulder: (To Patterson) Well I wouldn't want to disappoint you by not disappointing you.
---
Scully: (To Mulder) Look, when I couldn't reach you I went to your apartment. I saw your new wallpaper. (Referring to all the gargoyle drawings)
---
Skinner: Are
you worried about Agent Mulder?
Scully: (scared
and worried) No sir.
Skinner: Off
the record.
Scully: (Silent
and Gives Skinner The look...)
Skinner: So
am I.
---
Mulder: We work
in the dark.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Scully: You know,
it's strange. Men can blow up buildings, and they can be nowhere near the
crime scene. But we can piece together the evidence and convict them beyond
a doubt. Our labs here can
recreate out
of the most microscopic details their motivation and circumstance to almost
any murder. Right down to a killer's attitude towards his mother and that
he was a bedwetter. But in the case of a woman... my sister... who was
gunned down in cold blood in a well-lit apartment building by a shooter
who left the weapon at the crime scene, we can't even put together enought
to keep anybody interested.
---
(Scully laughs at Mulder)
Mulder: What?
Scully: I'm just constantly amazed by you. I mean, you're working down here in the basement, sifting through... files and transmissions that any other agent would just throw away in the garbage.
Mulder: Well that's WHY I'm in the basement, Scully.
Scully: You're in the basement because they're afraid of you. Of your relentlessness. And because they know that they could drop you in the middle of the desert and tell you the truth is out there and you'd ask them for a shovel.
Mulder: That's what you think of me?
Scully: Well, maybe not a shovel. (Smiles) Maybe a backhoe.
Mulder: Well that's good, because there's some garbage in San Diego I want you to help me dig through. (Gives Scully her plane ticket)
---
Doc: Whatever
these men came in contact with, it was man-made. Levels like this just
don't appear in nature.
Mulder: Not
on this planet.
---
Mulder: So it's okay for us to go on board?
Morgan: Sure. Probably get more radiation off your cell-phone.
(Scully hangs it up, looking at it funny)
---
Morgan: ...It's
a mess, huh? (The ship)
Mulder: (Coming
in from other side) Smells like home.
---
Mulder: Looks
like the fusilage of a plane.
Scully: It's
a North American P-51 Mustang.
Morgan: (Light
goes on) Yeah, sure is.
Mulder: I just
got very turned on.
---
Skinner: Who
are you guys?
MIBS: We work
for the intelligence community.
Skinner: Remind
me not to move there.
---
Mulder: This
seat taken, Ms. Kallenchek? Geraldine Kallenchek, isn't it?
Ms. K: Jerri,
with a 'J'
Mulder: I noticed
you flew first class. Must be good money selling classified documents.
Ms. K: It's
a bull market, hon. And I'm Miss Popular. Let's Make A Deal.
---
Ms. K: Arrest
me? With what, your chopsticks? This is Hong Kong, Mr. Mulder. They don't
allow handguns here. They took yours away at the airport. (Mulder smiles
and handcuffs her to him) Hey! Hey! You can't do that!
Mulder: I just
did. NOW let's make a deal...
---
Mulder: Open it. (The door to her office. Since she just looks at him, he moves around and kicks it open) Pardon my gender type, but after you. (Shoves her in)
---
Mulder: Where
are the lights?
Krycek: Right
here. (Points gun)
Mulder: Krycek.
Thought guns were against the law here.
Krycek: Yeah,
well you know what they say... when guns are outlawed... (only outlaws
will have them)
---
(After Krycek
throws Ms. K out door and slams the door, with handcuff chain through crack
in door)
Mulder: No way to treat your business partner. Especially since she seems to be moving those secrets you're selling so well.
(gunshots fire outside in the hall. Ms K hits floor dead. Krychek moves towards window)
Krycek: Looks like she's your partner now.
---
Mulder: (Krycek
approaches Mulder, who punches him in stomach) That's for your partner.
This is for me. (hits him with is head in the nose) And this is for my
father. Points Krycek's gun at his abdomen)
Krycek: I didn't
kill your father.
Mulder: NOW
you tell me...
---
Mulder: Feeling
better?
Krycek: (Possessed
w/ 'black oil' a.k.a "Purity") Like a new man.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
CSM: Have the
bodies destroyed.
Doc: But sir,
these men aren't dead yet!
CSM: Isn't that
the prognosis?
---
Mulder: (Wakes up to Scully's smiling face) Guess I'm not dead.
---
Scully: Hi. How
are you feeling?
Skinner: Like
someone's been inside my stomach redecorating.
---
Scully: (comes
into Mulder's office and notices his suit)
Mulder: It looked
great on me in the store...
---
Mulder: I think
that Mrs. Gautier went to Hong Kong under the control of this thing to
find Krycek. (Scully laughs). I know... I know how it sounds.
Scully: Is anybody
NOT looking for Krycek?
---
Frohike: Nothin'
to it.
Byers: You should
call upon our services more often.
Langly: We show
talent for these G-MAN activities.
Mulder: You
mean if I want somebody whacked on the knee with a lead pipe?
Frohike: Only
if you want it done right.
Mulder: (Finds
tape case but no tape) It's gone.
---
Mulder: Actually it's a phone number. New York City area code. 555-1012. (Hands Frohike pencil) Now don't drop that. It's a finely calibrated piece of investigative equipment. I'm gonna make a phone call...
Frohike: (Still holding pencil like Mulder gave it to him) I'll be damned.
---
FBI: His name is Luis Ferdinal. Native of Nicaragua. School of the America's alumni...
---
Scully: There
must be 200 silos out here. And if I'm correct they were all filled with
concrete in accord with the disarmament treaty when the base was decommissioned.
Mulder: (Pulling
out gun) I didn't sign any disarmament treaty.
---
Scully: (In silo)
Where's the concrete.
Mulder: Apparently
nobody else signed that treaty either.
Scully: One
down, 199 silos to go.
---
Mulder: Actually
I wanted to talk to you, I wanted to... thank you for everything you did.
Skinner: You
mean me getting shot in the gut?
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Pusher: Let's get this show on the road... (pulls down flap of man in front of him, eXposing the FBI)
---
Pusher: (face
in register turnstyle that is spinning) Turn this thing off!
Frank: You're
Pusher, I presume?
Pusher: You
must be Frank BURST. You know I gotta tell ya, hehe, ya got the greatest
name.
---
Mulder: "Ro-neen."
It's a samurai without a master. (looks at Scully) What, you never say
Yojimbo?
Scully: Still,
what does it mean?
Mulder: Means
I bet I know ten to one what this guy's got stacked on the back of his
toilet.
---
Scully: Mulder,
I'm still not sure what we're looking for.
Mulder: Samurais
without masters have to advertise.
---
Scully: Inducing someone to buy hair color is a little different than inducing them to drive in front of a speeding truck.
---
Scully: Well
even if he could push his will, why would he... he cause an accident when
he himself was in the car?
Mulder: Maybe
he REALLY didn't want to go to jail.
---
Mulder: (Waking
Scully up) Hey. I think you drooled on me.
Scully: (Still
sleepy) Uh... sorry.
---
Pusher: ...You and your pretty partner seem awfully close. Do you work well together?
---
Scully: So, he's
a killer AND a golfer.
Mulder: Rings
a bell, huhm? Let's go, G-woman.
---
Pusher: (To lawyer)
Thank you very much. Excuse me for a minute. (Goes over to Mulder) I believe
you owe me five dollars.
Mulder: (Lookin'
for a $5 bill but as he's looking down at wallet, says) Hey, your shoe's
untied. (Pusher looks down) Made you look. How do YOU do it?
---
Mulder: ...Modell
psyched the guy out... he put the whammy on him.
Scully: Please
eXplain to me the scientific nature of the "whammy".
---
Scully: ...I'm
just looking for an explanation a little more mundane than the "whammy."
Mulder: Well,
he's laughing at us, Scully.
---
Skinner: (To Mulder) And you're saying this same mysterious phenomenon is the reason I have a size 7 heel mark on my face.
---
Mulder: (checkin' out the fridge) Hey Scully, check this out. Mango Kiwi Tropical Swirl. Now we KNOW we're dealing with a madman.
---
Frank: What's
up, Modell? How ya doin? Long time no see. Told ya we knew where you lived.
Nice apartment, Modell. Who does your decorating? The Grinch who stole
Christmas?
Modell: Ha ha
ha! Agent Frank Burst. The guy with the great name!
---
Mulder: (Admiring
video camera gear) Think I can get the Playboy channel?
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Mulder: Personally, if someone digs me up in 1,000 years, I hope there's a curse on them, too.
---
Scully: Well
apparently they've learned something from you, too.
Bilac: Yesssssss,
I've been teaching them the joys of American Bureaucracy.
---
(After leaving Bilac's house)
Mulder: Nice to meet people who really believe in something, isn't it?
---
Scully: ...and
the lack of other suspects.
Mulder: He did
look a bit squirrely back there.
Scully: Maybe
because he was up late last night murdering Craig Horning.
---
Scully: So you
think Bilac's innocent? That the victim wasn't even killed at all? That
he was devoured by a mythical jaguar spirit?!?!?
Mulder: Go with
it, Scully.
---
Scully: (Drops
a rat in bag) Ugh. Label that.
Cop: As what?
Scully: Partial...
dead rat body part...
---
Mulder: Rats?
Scully: Apparently the museum always had a rat problem. They must have crawled into the engine compartment to keep warm.
Mulder: (Ewwwww eXpression)
---
Mulder: Do we
know for sure it's Luden?
Scully: Yeah,
by what he had for lunch: corn chowder and... it looks like he'd been snacking
on sunflower seeds all afternoon.
Mulder: A man
with taste...
---
Scully: Most
probably a rat.
Mulder: More
rats.
Scully: Yep.
---
Scully: I guess
there is only one way to find out... (looking in toilets in women's room)
Mulder: Oh,
I hate this. (Lifts lid) Rats. Every toilet.
Scully: How
did they get in there?
Curator: (Pops
in) Agent Mulder!
Mulder: (Startled,
and disgusted by rats) Aaaa!
---
Curator: Police
found something outside.
Scully: Mona
Wassner?
Curator: No,
Sugar, her dog. He's dead.
Mulder: Finally
a body.
---
Vet: When I dissected
the dog's stomach, I found an undigested fragment of intestine, which appears
to be feline...
Scully: The
dog ate a cat.
Vet: I also
found what appears to be bits of rat fur. I think the rat ate the poison.
Scully: Cat
ate a rat.
Mulder: And
the dog ate the cat... More rats, Scully.
---
Scully: So what are we taking about, Mulder? A posessed rat? The return of Ben?
---
Scully: Have
YOU been drinking Yahe, Mulder?
Mulder: Go with
it, Scully.
---
Mulder: And one
way in (Through the steam tunnels).
Scully: And
one way out.
Mulder: Ladies
first.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Scully: What a way to go.... (burned alive in a crematorium)
---
Chao: We got
lucky with this one. (finding a body)
Mulder: Lucky?
Thats an interesting word for it.
---
Mulder: How many dishes do you have to break before your boss tosses you in an oven?
---
Scully: So youre
saying that the ancestral spirits pushed Johnny Lo into the oven and turned
on the gas?
Mulder: Well,
it would sure teach him to respect his elders, wouldn't it?
---
Scully: (Feeling
paint on door) It's still tacky.
Mulder: Can
you copy it down for me? (Painted words)
Neary: Yeah,
sure...
Mulder: (Looking
around apartment) Talk about tacky...
---
Scully: What
slum lord would spring for a new carpet in a dump like this?
Mulder: Looks
like he saved some money on carpet tacks and didnt even bother replacing
the old padding.
---
Chao: But the truth is I'm more haunted by the size of my mortgage payments. (than ancestral spirits)
---
Mulder: Looks like somebody was trying to get two burials for the price of one.
---
Scully: Do you
know how much the human body is worth, Mulder?
Mulder: Depends
on the body.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Jose
Chung's From Outer Space - 3x20
(After Scully raves about his books)
Chung: And here I was thinking you were just some... brainy beauty. Now I find out that you also have... good taste.
---
Scully: Ok, just
as long as you're attempting to record the truth...
Chung: Dear
god no! How could I possibly do that?
---
Cop: Cuz I don't need no lie detector test to see the only thing you were abducted by were your rampaging hormones, you punk!
---
Cop: Well, thanks
a lot! You really BLEEPED up this case!
Scully: Well,
of course he didn't actually say 'bleeped', he said...
Chung: No need
to elaborate. I'm quite familiar with law enforcement... vernacular.
---
Mulder: You still
gonna hold the boy?
Cop: Oh, you
bet your blankety-blank bleep I am!
---
Mulder: Well,
so what if they had sex?
Scully: So we
know it wasn't an alien that probed her.
---
Chung: Agent Scully, you are so kind... He's a nut! I read his manifest-o...
---
Chrissy: I just want to be taken away to some place where I don't have to worry about... finding a job.
---
SAAB: One of them was disguised as a woman, but wasn't pulling it off (Scully). Like, her hair was red... but it was a little TOO red, you know.
---
SAAB: And the other one (Mulder), his face was so blank and expressionless, he was barely human.
---
SAAB: ...I think
he (Mulder) was a mandroid. The only time he reacted was when he saw the
dead alien...
Mulder: (Looks
at alien, then with a high-pitched scream..) Waaaaaa!
Cop: Yeah, that's
a bleepin' dead alien body if I ever bleepin' saw one.
---
SAAB: Well, hey, I didn't spend all those years playing Dungeons and Dragons and not learn a little something about courage.
---
Schaefer: Ya'ever flown a flying saucer? Afterwords, sex seems trite.
---
Mulder: (while
chompin' down slice after slice of sweet potatoe pie) Have you ever found
a metal implant in your body?
Cook: (Shaking
his head)
Mulder: Have
you checked everywhere?
---
Scully: That was Detective Manners. He said they just found your bleepin' UFO.
---
Chrissy: Love...
is that all you men think about?
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Skinner: After 17 years, they (divorce papers) can wait another day.
---
Scully:Mulder,
it's me. I just got your message. You said Skinner called in a homicide?
Mulder: Yeah,
it appears to be a little more complicated than that. It seems like he
had a front row seat.
---
Scully: They
found no semen samples. There was some irritation, probably an allergic
reaction to latex.
Mulder: Least
they're having safe sex.
---
Scully: (while
looking at a nice condo) Business must be booming.
Mulder: I think
you mean banging.
---
Scully: Well
you can start by telling us if she was working last night and if she was,
who paid for her company.
Scully: I'm
afraid I can't do that.
Mulder: I guess
that would hurt future book sales, eh?
---
Scully: Do you
know him?
Mrs Skinner:
I used to think so. I'm Sharon Skinner. I'm his wife.
---
Pendrell: D'ya
know how an air bag works?
Mulder: Your
car hits somethin', a bag fills with air, you don't die.
---
Scully: Why not
just kill him?
Mulder: Well,
they already tried that once, and a second attempt would be too obvious,
even to these thugs.
---
Killer: I'm close.
I'll see you in an hour. (He's watching them just outside the restaurant)
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
USFS: Frog populations are declining all over the globe, Dr. Faraday. No-one knows why. We can't possibly place them all on the Endangered Species List.
Faraday: You'd find a way if they were cute furry mammals we were dealing with.
---
(Queequeg yelps and makes lots of sounds in the back seat)
Scully: Nature's
calling, I think we should pull over soon.
Mulder: Did
you really have to bring that thing?
Scully: You
wake me up on a Saturday morning, tell me to be ready in five minutes,
my mother's out of town, all of the dog sitters are booked and you know
how I feel about kennels. So, unless you want to lose your security
deposit on the car, I suggest you pull over.
---
Scully: So you
think... that there is a serial killer at large?
Mulder: Uhh,
the operative word being "large".
---
Faraday: Closest he ever came to communing with nature was subscribing to National Geographic.
---
Scully: Ya know,
his fly's undone.
Mulder: Are
you insinuating something?
---
Scully: ...we
eat fish and fish eat us.
Mulder: Are
fish also known for eating half and saving half for later?
---
Mulder: Yeah, but you got 2 to 3 in as many weeks. I'd say you're a little out of your bell curve, sheriff.
---
Teen: Dude, what's wrong with you? You made me drop my toad!
---
Mulder: It's three in one day, sheriff. All this driving from crime scene to crime scene is giving me highway hypnosis.
---
Scully: Could
you please repeat the last part again? I kinda faded out.
Mulder: Which...
which part?
Scully: After
you said I'm sorry?
---
Scully: You know,
on the old mariners maps the cartographers would designate uncharted territories
by writing "here be monsters."
Mulder: ahh,
I got a map of New York City just like that.
---
Scully: (As their boat sinks) There goes our $500 deposit.
---
Mulder: yeah, you know, living in the city you forget that night is so, uh, dark.
---
Scully: It's not until you get back out to nature until you realize that everything is out to get you. And my father always taught me to respect nature, 'cause it has no respect for you.
---
(Duck swims in out of fog, both have guns drawn)
Scully: (sorta
laughs, puts gun down)
Mulder: I'm
still tempted to fire.
---
Scully: I called him Ahab and he called me Starbuck. So I named my dog Queequeg. It's funny, I just realized something.
Mulder: It's a bizarre name for a dog, huh?
Scully: No. How much YOU'RE like Ahab. You're so... consumed by your personal vengeance against life, whether it be its inherent cruelties or its' mysteries, and... everything takes on a warped significance to fit your megalomaniacal cosmology.
Mulder: Scully, are you coming on to me?
---
Scully: You know
Mulder, you ARE Ahab...
Mulder: You
know... it's interesting you should say that because I've always wanted
a pegleg...
---
(Huge splashing comes near)
Scully: What
was that?
Mulder: I dunno,
but it ain't no duck.
---
Scully: (To Mulder) Well, captain, what now?
---
Scully: Well,
you slew the big white whale, Ahab.
Mulder: Yeah,
but I still don't have that pegleg.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Mulder: Our blind date's not off to a great start. I've been waiting here nearly 2 hours.
---
MIB: I was asked
to make sure you weren't followed.
Mulder: It's
just you, me and the drug dealers.
MIB: Well, this
area's always been known for its criminal element.
Mulder: Especially
when Congress is in session.
---
Mulder: Isn't
this a school day?
Boy 1: (surprised)
We didn't cut!
Boy 2: We got
a pass.
Mulder: You
got a pass to come in here and eat these people's food and watch their
TV?
Boy 1: No....
Scully: How
did you get in here?
Boy 1: Through
the window. They leave it open for the cat.
Mulder: Well,
maybe you should head back to school. (They go towards the window) No,
no, no, use the front door.
---
Scully: Mulder,
look at this. There must be thousands of videos here.
Mulder: Anything
good? (Scully gives him a "look")
---
Scully: ...You know that's what Patnick was watching at the hospital when he went all 'wiggy'.
---
Mulder: I just watched 36 hours of Bernard Shaw and Bobbi Batista. I'm about ready to kill somebody too.
---
Mulder: Studies have also shown a causal connection between cow flatulence and the depletion of the ozone layer.
---
Mulder: All I know is television does not make a previously sane man go out and kill five people thinking they're all the same guy. Not even Must-See TV can do that to you.
---
Scully: No, I'm
gonna watch the rest of these tapes. Just out of curiosity.
Mulder: You
have fun.
---
Mulder: A thing of beauty is a joy forever. What do you think, Scully?
(Holding a Little Traveller figurine)
---
Mulder: (Still holding the Little Traveller figurine) Unless you consider bad taste an act of violence...
---
Frohike: ...Glad
you asked!
Mulder: Bet
all you guys were officers in the audio-visual club in high school, huh?
---
Frohike: (waves towards the oscilloscope) We have touchdown.
---
Frohike: But we don't want to talk about it over the phone. Big Brother may be listening.
---
Mulder: It's
the naked lady in the ice cubes.
Frohike: Aahhh,
one of my personal favorites.
---
Scully: ...Everybody
was out to get me.
Mulder: Now
you know how I feel most of the time.
---
Mulder: You want me to go first this time?
(the last time, innkeeper got shot at through the door)
Innkeeper: Damn
straight!
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes
Mulder: I want The Smoking Man smoked out. I want him exposed for the murderous sonuvabitch that he is.
---
Mr. Mulder: And if you can't appease their conscience you kill them. But you can't kill them all. You can't kill their love. Which is what makes them who they are. Makes them better than us. Better than you.
---
Mulder: You gonna
smoke that?(takes out his gun) Or you wanna smoke on this?
CSM: You're
giving me a choice?
---
Mulder: I should shoot you right here, but they'd probably be able to save you.
CSM: Do it. Do it, Agent Mulder.
---
Mulder: You shoot
me and you'll never find it.
X: I ought to
shoot you anyway... after everything I've given you.
---
X: You're a dead
man, Agent Mulder. One way or the other.
Back To Season
3's Isms and Quotes