1/24/00

My world has completely changed since my last entry. Rob has been left behind, which makes me sad, but there is nothing I can do about it. I knew that he was leaving when I met him, and I would have to say goodbye as quickly as we met. It was hard, my stomach cramped, I could not even look at him. I told him I needed to detach; all of you who know me well would realize why. However, there was more to this than my exit from his life; you see, I was entering into an Other’s. The soul of darkness kissed my lips with exceptional simplicity and sent me full force into another world. The tides are crossing and I swear I have found something I was born with a destination to find. I am not the only one who feels this way. Everyone that belongs to my new surroundings has realized this as well. The face I always see in my meditations has arrived in full force! He is my vampire. My neck is now swollen from his morbid kiss, and the tender skin aches. The dull pain brings back the intense experience at times. This painful pleasure that is derived is bliss. This is the first being that I have ever really felt a connection with. The chaotic simplicity of these swirling fates pulls me in every direction, and yet, I am firmly planted on the ground. Today I was tested. Fate can be quite cruel at times. She sent yet Another in my direction, and I know it was her test for me. Some pale faced male with long hair was hired at my work. He was one of the few people I gawked over when entering my mundane work atmosphere. He was a striking force that I never thought I could get the attention of. It turns out I have passed the test this far, but fate does not give up. She keeps throwing fireballs at me with nothing to defend myself. My only escape is dodging. You see, this new kid knows Charles rather well, and has now invited me to hang out with him and the band. Also, he recognized me from the Seraphim Shock shows. I could not believe my face stood out enough for him to recognize me while I was drowning with all of the other souls in a sea of black. This is all I can share now, till next time…