Pain has no mercy
No care of timing
Striking without warning
As tentacles of pressure
Squeezing at the heart and stomach
Forcing the opening
To that avalanche of thoughts and events
You have been trying so hard to forget
Exploding to be played yet once again
To torment the heart and mind.
You fight it
With every breath you fight it
Trying to force it away
Some times you win
But mostly
It overwhelms you
Overpowers you
Consumes you
The enlarging lump in the throat
The trigger to the tears
Swallowing hard
Forcing eyelids tight
But you have lost
And once again have to
Re-live this agonising torment
You have tried so hard to block.
Thoughts exploding in turmoil
Randomly appearing
No order or sequence required
Conversations replayed
If only you could change the words
Always questioning
Why did I say that?
Why didn't I say this?
What made them feel like that?
And as the conversations in the mind
Continue and jumble
The sobbing starts and you know
You're to be left once more
With unanswered questions
That are going to come back
To haunt you
Over and over again.
Oh yes pain has no mercy
No care of timing
It cares not if you're at work
At home, awake or asleep
It comes without warning
To leave you
Exhausted
Grieved
Devastated
Desolate
Destroyed.
© Embeth Dec 01
