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Prom Night IV: Deliver Us From Evil

1991

8 kills
First Kill - 6 minutes

Here we go again with 1957. You know, I wish they'd make up their damn minds about what exactly happened at Hamilton High on prom night in 1957! This is getting really stupid. This time, we find out that some kids left the prom to go have sex in a car, and some crazed lunatic priest butchered them.

I guess the gym burned later that night? (See Prom Night III and you'll know why I'm cunfused...) Anyway, we quickly fast forward to the present, of course, and we find a young priest who has been assigned to guard the crazy, murdering priest from 1957. See, he's been locked up in the basement of some church this whole time. Well, the young priest thinks this is immoral or something, and decides not to administer his medication and see what happens. Wanna guess what happens? Right. The insane priest kills the poor guy. With a telephone line. Then he runs away. Are you sleeping yet?

Well, it only gets worse. Next we meet 4 kids: Mark, Megan, Jeff and Laura. (Believe it or not) Prom Night is coming up! But... these bad kids decide to skip the prom and go out to some house that Mark's parents have in the sticks. Of course, they first ride by the prom in the limo and moon their friends. Then they are dropped off at the house for a weekend of sex, drugs, and rock n roll, minus the drugs and rock n roll, plus some wine and a crazy priest killer.

I don't remember how, but we somehow learn that the house they are in was once a monastary or something. This was the logical place for the priest to return after he flees. Instead of his fellow priests, though, he finds fornicating teens. We know how he feels about this.

He watches them for a little while and realizes shortly that he's going to have to kill them. First, he calls them. I guess he ran to the pay phone right outside maybe. He basically tells them they're going to die, adding a few un-priestly curse words for good measure. "I just received an obscene phone call!" exclaims Megan. Then we finally get to see a couple of interesting kills.

First, Laura disappears. Jeff thinks he finds her rocking in a chair, but it turns out to be the priest wearing a wig. He kisses Jeff on the lips, squeezes his head, lifts him in the air, says the Our Father, waits for him to die, and tosses him aside. That was kind of different. Next, we see Mark and Megan running outside. They hear something and stop. Suddenly, FIRE! In front of them are two crosses, Jeff on one, Laura on the other, and they can only watch their friends' corpses burn. They run inside, the priest chases them upstairs, and they climb out the attic onto the roof. Megan jumps down. The priest, however, knows exactly where Mark's foot is and STABS it through the roof. Mark falls and begins to slide down the roof, but the priest stabs again, catching his hand. He pulls out the knife, lets him slide some more, and stabs his hand again. Impossible, yet brutal torture. Finally, he lets him fall, climbs on the roof, and drops a knife off which goes right through his chest.

Aside from the few interesting parts I described, this movie is crap. Out of 8 kills, there are 3 or 4 that we don't even see. "Crap kills" is what Blackie Woo calls them. If you do rent it, just fast forward an hour, watch the last 2 kills, and then put in a better movie.

-- Coolio


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