Bad Dog,Good Dog
There were three dogs in the pound. One dog looks at another one and asks him why he's there.
"Oh, I got a hold of my master's fur coat and chewed it up."
"Oh, no! What are they going to do to you?"
"Ah, they're having me put to sleep."
"Oh, that's too bad."
"So, why are you here?" asks the other dog back.
"Well, I went into my master's bedroom and chewed apart their mattress."
"Oh, well, what are they going to do with you."
"Well, they're putting me to sleep too."
So, they both look at the third dog, and he's got a half-ass shitty grin on his face.
"What are you in here for?" one of them asked.
"Well, my master had just finished taking a shower, and she bent over to get some clothes out of her dresser. Well, it was right there in front of me, and I couldn't resist, so I mounted her and took care of business..."
"What?! Are you crazy! Oh, man! She must be having you put to sleep for sure!"
"No," the third dog replied, "Just having my nails trimmed."
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