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Dead frog test:

A kindergarten teacher heard that one of her pupils had found a frog. She inquired as to whether it was alive or dead. "Dead," she was informed. "How do you know?" she asked. "Because I pissed in his ear," said the child innocently. "You did WHAT?" squealed the teacher in surprise. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst'. He didn't move."

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