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Skanaty the Pixie sat at her tiny Pixie vanity in her tiny little Pixie house in the Land of Severe Rockin Out brushing out her glittery hair when there was a knock at the door. To her surprise, standing there were 5 somewhat cute boys in their late teens or early twenty's. "Can I help you?" asked Skanaty in her tiny Pixie voice.
"Hi," said a bleached blonde one. "We're selling Girl Scout Cookies. Do you want some?" This tipped off Skanaty right here. These boys weren't Girl Scouts! They were that annoying boy band N'SYNC!
"Aren't you guy's that evil boy band?" Said a suspicious Skanaty. "You better get out of here. If any of the guards see you here in the Land of Severe Rockin Out, you're dead." She warned.
"Oh, I don't think that'll be a problem," said the one with the shitty looking braids.
"What do you mean?" Skanaty said slowly backing away.
Then, they all began to...yes...sing to her. Singing some sappy boy band love song that any chick or gay man will fall victim to if listened to.
"No! No, please! Stop...stop..." Skanaty grew weak and then fell under the evil hypnotic control of N'SYNC.
"Phase one, complete," said the older looking one.
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Tara and Tavis' 20 minutes were up and everyone was watching Tara try to learn the way of the pancake when there was a knock at the door. Kiley opened it to see (you guessed it) the Almighty Skaboom!
"Skaboom!" Tara squealed and ran to give him a hug. "Damn nice to see ya."
"Hey guys." Skaboom greeted everyone with a hug and a smile. Except Kiley. They just grunted at each other. "Um, have any of you seen Skanaty around?" Skaboom asked.
"Why?" asked Aaron. "Isn't she with you?"
"Well, I went to her little Pixie house today and she wasn't there. But I did find this," he said holding up a tiny piece of bleached out hair.
Dan, who was an expert at these things, took the follicle and examined it closely. "It's bleached. Probably off the head of someone in their late teens. A guy. A pussy actually. This guy is a wimpy little bitch." Dan concluded.
"Shit, then you know what that means!" said Tara, "Skanaty's been kidnapped by..." her voice trailed off.
"Who? Tell us!" Everyone ad-libbed.
"N'SYNC." said Tara not making eye contact.
Everyone gasped.
"Well, shit we gotta go save her!" boomed Skaboom.
"Let's go!" said Aaron and they all headed for the door.
"Ah-ah-ah! Not you," said Scott pulling Tara's shirt back, "You keep practicing."
"But, Scott!" Tara pleaded.
"No, you learn this and then you can come and chase evil doers with the rest of us," he said pointing to the stove.
"Dammit," Tara mumbled as she trudged back to the Kitchen of Absolutely No Space.
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The RBF, Skaboom, and Kiley ransacked the Land Of Severe Rockin Out looking for the missing Pixie. They searched the Palace, The Movies of Endless Shenanigans, the Mall of Never-ending Excitement, and they were now going through the Forest of Freakishness when Matt got thirsty.
"You guys," he said, "I'm getting thirsty."
"Yeah me too." Skaboom added.
"Where can we get a few beers around here?" asked Scott looking around.
"Well, we're kind of in the middle of a forest," Carlos pointed out. "There's not like a vending machine or anything?"
"Hey! What's that?" said Kiley, pointing into the distance.
It was a case of beer. How convenient! Too convenient actually.
The Party People ran to the cardboard box and they were passing out the beers when the ground dropped out from under them and they fell into N'SYNC's evil Dungeon.
"Holy shit!" said Carlos. "What the hell is this?"
"Look!" said Aaron pointing.
"Skanaty!" said Skaboom running up to the little Pixie chained to the wall.
"Those bastards!" cried Dan, "Not only are they pussys but their into Pixies with Bondage too! That's awful!"
The crew tried to undo Skanaty's chains as she babbled something about homos. When suddenly, they heard it. Softly at first but then it grew louder. The singing. The group whipped around and saw the boy band serenading them with their hypnotic love songs.
"Getting weak..." said Kiley trying to resist the evil force.
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Aaron blinked. He surveyed the sight around him. The Party People were all chained to the dungeon wall. "This is it," he thought sadly, "This is how it ends for the Reel Big Fish. Death by way of N'SYNC."
"Wakey wakey!" said the boy band approaching them.
"You son of a bitches!" screamed Kiley kicking her legs around, "You'll never get away with this! You're gonna fry!"
"Oh, I don't think so!" said the bleached one, evily, "You see, we're almost done with our plan to dominate the Land Of Severe Rockin Out! We've kidnapped the main house group, the Almighty, and the Princess! We know about the others that aren't quite as fans of us as we want them. People like you. You guys screw us over with your stupid horn sections and your moshing and your gorgeous chicks that like to party! So now we're taking over! Now we'll be really really cool, popular and we'll rule everything!" he let out an evil laugh that made everyone shudder.
"Will you stop at nothing?" wailed Tavis.
"When hell freezes over!" said the braided one.
"When pigs fly!" said the ugly one.
"When Tara makes the perfect pancake." said Scott.
The party people all laughed.
"Yeah, that's when we'll stop! That's what'll kill us." said the bleached one trying to get in on the inside joke.
Just then, Tara ran in with a dish stacked with pancakes. Fluffy, golden, disc shaped, beautiful pancakes! "I did it, you guys!" she exclaimed merrily. "I finally made the perfect pancakes!"
Then N'SYNC burst into flames and melted into nothing but a pile of sizzling goo on the floor.
"Hey, you killed them." said Skaboom.
"Huh," said Tara thoughtfully. "Fancy that."
"Will you get us down from here? My wrists are chaffing," Tavis complained.
"OK don't move!" Tara instructed. She took one of Aaron's shoes and shot out little star beams and they melted the chains and the Party People were free to party again. All except one...
Skanaty lay on the floor motionless. "Skanaty!" said Skaboom dropping to his knees beside her. "Skanaty please wake up!" You see, Pixies are very fragile little creatures when under hostile conditions such as these.
"How do we help her?" asked Kiley.
"The Kids Don't Like It!" said Skaboom, getting up. "You remember that story Peter Pan?"
"The porn?" asked Carlos.
"NO! NO! The Disney movie!" said Skaboom. "When Tinkerbell was dying you had to clap your hands so she would live! Well, it's kinda the same thing for Skanaty only to have to sing the kids don't like it WITH the hand motions."
"You mean raising the roof and throwing your fist?" asked Tara.
"Exactly. Now, Aaron, Carlos, Dan and Tavis you raise the roof. Tara, Kiley, me, Scott, and Matt will throw our fists. You too, kids at home!" said Skaboom motioning to the camera.
So they began to sing. Aaron's group raised the roof while saying the "kids don't like it" and Scott's group threw their fists on the "no no's." This went on for a while until Skanaty coughed and blinked a little.
"By golly it worked." said Tara thoughtfully.
"Is it over?" asked Skanaty.
"Yeah, said Skaboom helping her up, "Tara made the perfect pancakes and killed them."
"Wow." said Skanaty. "Go, Tara."
They all feasted on Tara's pancakes and then had a party celebrating the demise of the evil force N'SYNC. There was some table dancing, some cotton candy, some beer drinking, some cows, and of course...hot nooky.
~*~*~THE END~*~*~
And when you all get shot, and cannot carry on though you die, La Resistance lives on!