PWL BIGTIME LIVE!

MONDAY, JUNE 26, 2000 - NERF FOOTBALL STADIUM - LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA.

KERMIT THE FROG opened the show by interviewing LONG SWEET LIPS. None had any idea when Mondo Mbamba would return with his huge surprise, but assured Kermit that LSL would be bringing the gold back to the team shortly.

Opening Match: SUPER ELASTIC pinned QUESTION MARK in 6:47 to retain the World cruiserweight championship.

• The usual fast-paced affair from the cruiserweight division. Karate Man showed up following the match and demanded a chance to regain the c-weight belt. Elastic said that KM was the only other cruiserweight with any ability, and promised him a shot sometime in the near future.

Second Match: CAP'N CRUNCH pinned ORKO in 3:18 to retain the Midgets' World championship.

• Orko had the champion beaten, but interference from AA sewed the bout up for the Cap'n. After the match, Crunch and AA celebrated by getting extremely drunk.

Third Match: M. KLEATS pinned SKELETOR in 5:09.

• Kleats received a surprisingly large amount of cheers as he pummeled the Greyskull native. Kleats took the mic and reiterated his promise to either regain the North American title or be the one to end Terror's World title reign.

Kermit spoke with World heavyweight champion THE TERROR. Terror brushed aside Kleats' apparent challenge, and dismissed Mondo's big surprise. Terror said that he already knew what the surprise is, and it's nothing he won't be able to handle.

Fourth Match: GENERAL ZOD (with URSA) defeated STARSHINE HIPPIE by submission in 8:33.

• A slight setback in Starshine's rise in the heavyweight ranks, but it would have been nearly impossible for anyone to subdue the angry General. Ursa informed Kermit during the match that Zod is angry not because he lost an ally, but because he was made a fool. Ursa promised Zod would obliterate Non from this planet.

Fifth Match: THE WHO-NEE-2 MEN were paid $639.75 by THE ELECTRIC MAYHEM, who lost to THE SEXECUTIONERS in 5:45 when Don Jeremy pinned Dr. Teeth.

• This match was noteworthy only because the Mayhem were idiotic enough to pay to wrestle a match in which The WN2 men were booked to lose. After the contest, the WN2 men attacked EM and laughed as they were hauled away by PWL Security.

Sixth Match: FAT ALBERT defeated AA (JUSTIN TOXICATED and AL COHOLIC) in an handicap match in 9:01 when Fat Albert bearhugged both opponents into submission.

• There was nothing anonymous about the drunkards in this bout. Fat Albert, known to down an entire brewery's worth of goods in one sitting, seemed genuinely amused by AA's wacky drunken stumbling. The match was entirely Albert's, and could have put it away in the opening seconds, but stretched it out because he's Fat Albert, he has that kind of power, and the fans love him.

Seventh Match: THE PILLARS OF PAIN (GOLEM and QUARTZ) wrestled RUFUS VAN PELT and BILLY JO JIVE (with "Sweet" SUSIE SUNSET) to a twenty-minute draw.

• The battle between the PWL tag titleholders was an impressive one, as all four put on an exhibition of moves and holds nobody thought they had. After the match, Quarzt informed Kermit that the reason they hadn't performed like that was because they hadn't had to before. Look for rematches aplenty in this beginning feud.

Kermit interviewed SCHOOLHOUSE ROCKY, who informed Froggy that tonight, the Schoolhouse Rock would finally take what is rightfully his, PWL championship gold. He proceeded to refer to Big Sid Smith as a "stepping stone" to the World heavyweight championship, something that was stolen from him a few weeks back.

Eighth Match: SUPER HEAVY pinned GRIMACE in 8:11.

• Grimace took control early on, but quickly tired and was soon no match for the powerful Super Heavy. Through dogged determination, Heavy pieced together several combinations of moves, and his hard work, determination, and love of the fans paid off with the W. Heavy received loud applause for his victory, as the fans can see that Heavy is actually serious about "doing it for all the fans out there."

Ninth Match: SCHOOLHOUSE ROCKY pinned BIG SID SMITH "The Neighborhood Bully" (with "Mean Old" MR. McMASTER) in 6:03 to win the North American heavyweight championship.

• SHR said he was going to do it, thereby leading to specualtion that he, of course, would not. It was a shock, then, for the fans in attendance when Rocky steamrolled over BSS to capture the coveted NA strap. During and after the match, M. Kleats looked on from the entranceway.

Your Main Event: THE TERROR pinned NON in 7:07 to retain the World heavyweight championship.

• Another day, another successful title defense from the World champeen. Terror easily outwitted his foe, still preoccupied with beating up his old friend Zod, and thus Non was easy pickings for the top man in the sport. Zod performed the standard run-in-and-attack-somebody following the match, naturally picking Non for the situation.